


puppets on a string

by funkylittlebidiot



Category: Doctor Strange (2016), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: M/M, Mainly just focussed on Ironstrange though, Not Avengers friendly
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-18
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-02-12 13:22:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 35
Words: 107,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21477076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/funkylittlebidiot/pseuds/funkylittlebidiot
Summary: Stephen Strange is a villain.But a hot one.
Relationships: Tony Stark/Stephen Strange
Comments: 268
Kudos: 834





	1. unimportant / beacon

**Author's Note:**

> Decided to post the oneshots from Tumblr on here as well as it's turning into a semi-coherent fic  
Not sure where it will lead
> 
> It's not Avengers friendly for plot reasons but no unnecessary character bashing. Mainly in the first few chapters though. 
> 
> Follow me on Tumblr @funkylittlebidiot for more updates

Stephen’s ropes lashed out, battlefield now devoid of any conscious bodies. Everyone was either knocked out or had been portaled away.

They tied around Tony’s arms and legs, keeping him in place no matter how hard he struggled. Hatred burned in his chest, sure it wasn’t subtle in the way he was glaring at the sorcerer.

The sorcerer stepped forward, growl around his lips, which immediately had him on guard.

He stopped an inch from where Tony was suspended in front of him, so close Tony would be able to count each freckle if he’d had any, but tony refused to look away from his eyes.

“Who did this to you?”

A simple question worth such a complicated answer.

“You did.”

Stephen tutted in disapproval, playful smirk returning for barely a second. “I would never. Not that pretty little face of yours.”

“It must have been an accident -“

The sorcerer growled, low and deep, making Tony’s stomach twist as the sorcerer reached up his hand to cup his chin and tilt his head up to the light.

“You had this before the battle,” he ground out, thumb tapping the edge of the bruise adjourning his left eye. “You think your pathetic little make up artists could hide it from my attention?”

Tony fought the urge to roll his eyes. It could have been way worse, but he had controlled himself. With his enhancement there could have been a lot more damage. And Tony knew he had provoked him, had questioned his judgement one too many times and had made one reckless decision too many.

No he hadn’t. He wasn’t some battered housewife. He knew this wasn’t right, but what choice did he have? The team had seen it happen and thought he deserved it. He had to suck it up for the greater good.

“Don’t pretend I don’t already know,” Stephen ground out, digging his fingers into his skin as a warning. Even if he’d wanted to, he could never leave bruising, not with his wretched hands. “Who did this to you?”

“If you know, you know…”

He dug his fingers harder, ignoring the spikes of pain through his own hand and leaned forward into Stark’s space, foreheads barely grazing together. “I won’t do anything unless you tell me. You need to say it.”

“Then I won’t.”

Stephen hissed as if disappointed, pressing forward a little bit more. Tony could feel the sorcerer’s lips so close to his own and knew his heart was starting to speed up, hatred coursing through him. His body reached forward as if on instinct, even as he screamed at it to behave, but a second later, the sorcerer had pushed away, retreating out of his personal space and leaving only his hand, still wrapped around his chin and thumb now pressed against Tony’s lips in a shushing movement.

“We’ll see each other again soon, Stark,” the sorcerer drew out, voice like liquid as he let go of Tony and glanced around the ruins of the abandoned building. Tony didn’t take his eyes off the sorcerer, but could see some of the bodies starting to stir with consciousness out of his peripheral vision.

A second later the sorcerer was gone, and portals dropped open to drop off their remaining team mates minus Steve. He always got back a little later, a little more bruised. The ropes faded from his arms and he dropped them, taking a deep breath as he let his faceplate cover him, his suit a preferred hide-out as his teammates were already complaining about having lost once again.

“What did he even want,” Scott groaned from where he was still lying on the ground, sprawled out in exhaust. “He just wrecked this building for no reason.”

“Stark,” Clint called out, readjusting his hearing aid as he favoured his left arm, “what did he say to you this time?”

“Nothing of importance.” He spit out, because after all, his well-being wasn’t of importance at all.

Not to them.

\----

New York was always noisy, but up this high he could hardly let it bother him.

Just because he wasn’t allowed to put restrictions on his lab and everyone was too suspicious of him to leave him alone in there for more than three minutes, didn’t mean he couldn’t code FRIDAY to lie about his location to the team.

No one would dare mess with the AI, but even then, chances of running into someone inside were too high for Tony’s liking.

The roof had become an easy escape.

He had built this tower with so many hopes for the future, to be a beacon of … something….

He couldn’t even imagine what he had hoped for back in the day.

Instead it had grown almost into a prison tower.

He knew he could leave if he really wanted to. No one could really stop him from taking his suits and getting the fuck out of there. Yet his own conscience, the voice telling him he had so much to make up for, couldn’t let him walk away from helping however he could. It was his duty. He was iron man, and he had made the world dependant on him the second he’d outed himself at that press conference so many years ago.

He could hate it, could regret the decisions he’d made, but he liked being Iron Man. He liked helping people and protecting them from harm. Just because he’d messed up a few times didn’t mean he should stop trying. He would learn and be better until eventually he could save everyone.

If only he wouldn’t have to rely on the Avengers for help.

Tony sighed and rolled his eyes as he felt a familiar gaze on him, annoyance coursing through his veins as he gritted his teeth together. “Can I help you?”

“I’m content to just watch.”

The words made Tony’s head swivel back in exasperation, turning away from the city to glare at the sorcerer. He was floating a little farther back, cloak billowing and legs crossed in the air. He was watching Tony tentatively, amused smirk calmer than earlier in the day.

It was infuriating, the calm with which the sorcerer was watching him. He never understood how he could go from such anger and determined movements to the bored, easy expressions outside of battle. It was like every time Tony met him, he was someone else. Some other emotion dominating, some other character he was playing.

Some fights he was playful, almost flirting, and others he was merciless, able to drop half an army with a single breath. He still hadn’t figured out what made the difference.

He had been angry earlier. Tony was fully aware of the sorcerer’s obsession with him. He didn’t understand it, and it put him in trouble with the team on many occasions, but he couldn’t deny that it had worked in his favour plenty of times.

“Coming back for seconds?” Tony growled out, glaring at the sorcerer, “I think it was pretty clear you had all of us beat earlier.”

“No one got hurt,” he waved him off, cloak fluttering behind him as if agreeing.

“Most of my teammates would beg to differ.”

“Your ‘teammates’ are whiny little idiots.”

Tony silently agreed, but he was completely focussed on the sorcerer, watching for any sudden movements and taking an inventory of the weapon systems currently installed in his suit. Fighting magic was futile, he’d long learned, but perhaps if he got the best of him somehow…

“Just because I won’t kill you doesn’t mean I’ll let myself be captured.” He started dryly, as if reading his mind. Perhaps he was, he was magic after all. “If you feel like letting off some steam, however, I’m perfectly willing to fight you.”

He could. He could so easily yell and fight and let out his frustrations on the sorcerer. He was a villain after all, one they’d been trying to capture for months now, the mysterious organisation always managing to evade their grasp.

But he was tired. He felt like he’d been fighting all day, still sore from the hits he’d taken. He didn’t care anymore.

Besides the fighting would only draw out the Avengers below and he didn’t particularly feel like explaining why he was on the roof in the first place.

Instead, he focussed on the city sprawled out below them, the movements of the cars throughout the buildings and the lights from the bridges to their sides. He could feel the sorcerer’s eyes on him, but he ignored it in favour of breathing in deeply, the midnight air cutting through his lungs.

He didn’t know how long they sat like that, the quiet surprisingly calming even with the sorcerer’s presence. Eventually, a voice cut through the air, yelling his name.

Tony frowned, and could feel Stephen’s hands fire up with a spell behind him.

A glance over the edge of the building confirmed his suspicion and he rolled his eyes fondly, before turning to the sorcerer in a swift movement, blaster pointed at his face.

He wasn’t fond of Peter climbing the tall building, but the teen had become resilient after their first meeting. It was also hard to deny that he liked the vigilante’s excited blabbering, and it wasn’t like he could invite the kid inside. He didn’t want him exposed to the other Avengers.

The sorcerer met his eyes with a raised eyebrow at Tony’s protective reaction, infuriating smirk still across his lips, but he dropped his hands, winked and disappeared.


	2. champagne

His head swivelled back as he noticed a dark figure at the edge of the room, catching Stephen’s smirk right before he disappeared into the hallway. A tiny growl escaped his mouth, frown digging into his forehead. 

He glanced back at his teammates as Natasha caught his eye with a questioning eyebrow raise. Faking a nonchalant shrug, he let a smile smooth out his features as he motioned towards the surrounding crowd. The ballroom was well lit, the amount of people daunting, but it still gave for a good escape. “Saw someone I recognised. Be right back.”

She smiled and rolled her eyes. It looked jovial, like a friend used to his antics, but his only friend here was Rhodey, somewhere on the side wooing officials. He managed to hide his scowl long enough to make his way through the room, taking some unnecessary twists and turns to hopefully get lost in the crowd before heading towards the door leading into the hallway. 

He could have sworn he’d seen Stephen head in this direction, and whatever the sorcerer would be doing at the gala couldn’t be anything good. 

The hallway was empty of course, any sign of life long gone, but that didn’t deter Tony. He walked through, slowly making his way passed the different doors to the heart of the building. 

The ballroom for the party had been close to the front hall, but the interior was getting darker, less polished, clearly not part of the event any longer. 

He opened another door, leading into a room that looked like it came straight from 1835. 

The loveseats in front of the fire looked so old it looked like they belonged in a museum, but they looked sturdy enough, as did the little desk under the window a little further away and the bookcases lining the far wall. It was a strange sight, the room, but he didn’t think about it much longer, attention caught by the man leaning against the fireplace mantel. 

It was startling seeing Strange in what appeared to be a normal suit, red tie poking out that seemed vaguely familiar somehow. One arm was crossed over his chest as his other hand held up a glass of champagne, the dark glove delicately holding on to the flute. Where he’d gotten it, he wasn’t sure; he could have sworn he hadn’t left the ballroom with it. 

He smirked at Tony, clearly not surprised by his entrance. Tony watched, frozen in place as the sorcerer took a delicate sip of his drink before pushing away from the fireplace and stalking over towards him. 

Tony didn’t know what to feel or do, watching the sorcerer’s moves without understanding them, nerves on edge, every cell in his body screaming of danger. 

“Champagne?”

It took Tony a minute for the question to sink in. Stephen was watching Tony with a quirked eyebrow as he shoved the flute at him. He took it, sense finally kicking back in as soon as the cold glass touched his skin. 

He narrowed his eyes at Strange, taking a step back to put some space between them. 

“What are you doing here?” He hissed, cursing that Captain Dickwad had made him leave the suit at the Tower. Sure, he wasn’t walking around with his shield either, but he was still enhanced. Nat had most likely snuck a small arsenal under her cocktail dress, anyway. 

“Auch, Stark, and here I thought we were having a moment,” the sorcerer lulled, voice low and smooth. “Aren’t you glad to see me?”

Tony didn’t answer, still glaring at Stephen as his hands clutched around the glass in anger. 

“Oh, I don’t believe that.” Stephen tutted, strutting over to the old chaise lounge and draping himself over it in a delicate movement. Tony was surprised the furniture didn’t creak and snap in two. “I couldn’t help notice you don’t have a date, after all. Couldn’t leave you on your lonesome now, could I?”

Tony rolled his eyes, fury coursing through him, and he took a swig of the champagne without thinking. Too late he considered the idea of poison. Sure, Strange had drank from it earlier and he had been pretty adamant about not hurting him, but he was still a villain. It tasted alright, however, so he took another swig and leaned his back against the door to watch the sorcerer. 

“Bring a date next time. Noted. Was that all?”

Something flashed in the sorcerer’s eyes. Tony found satisfaction in the way his smirk fell into a growl for just a second, the sorcerer’s poker-face wavering slightly. It was always exhilarating getting under someone’s skin, but Tony found he especially liked getting under Stephen’s. Perhaps because the sorcerer could so easily get under his. 

“Bring a date and they won’t survive the night.”

Tony frowned and couldn’t help rolling his eyes. His stomach twisted uncomfortably at the sorcerer’s clear jealousy. 

It had been a bluff either way. He didn’t have anyone he’d want to take with him. 

“So, you’re just here on a social call? Pretty sure you weren’t on the guest list.”

“I crash building on a daily basis, crashing parties is child’s play.”

“Didn’t seem like the party type is all.”

“Oh, au contraire,” Stephen smirked, sitting up a little to catch Tony’s eyes more easily, “I love them. Though the requirement is that I’m in the centre of attention, and with your presence the spotlight falls to you. Not that I blame them, mind you, that ass of yours is one to behold, but I get grumpy in the shadows.” 

Tony blamed the alcohol for the heating of his cheeks, forcing his face into a scoff as he glanced away towards the window. It looked out on Central Park, the trees barren as winter neared. 

He could feel Strange still watching him, and when he turned back, he was closer than he had expected, making him gasp slightly in surprise. 

The sorcerer had stood up from his seat and stalked closer, merely a foot apart from him now and smirk so clear from this close. 

“Good to see your face is fully healed.” Stephen let out, turning a considering glance towards where the bruise had been, “I don’t think Rogers would have liked my reaction if he’d left a permanent mark.”

“I still haven’t told you what happened,” Tony challenged, fire returning to his veins, “or are you going back on your word?”

“Don’t think I gave you my _word _per se,” Stephen hummed, smirk playing on his lips. Tony felt the anger returning, balling his hand into a fist at his side as he took in the sight of the sorcerer leaning closer still, crowding him against the door. His hand still holding the champagne flute felt useless. 

Stephen, either noticing the twitch of his hands against the glass or reading his mind - he still hadn’t ruled it out - plucked the glass out of his hand, taking a sip before making it disappear into thin air. “I can be creative, but if you’ve changed your mind and want to confess I’m all ears.”

He didn’t. Rogers was a dick, but he’d never let anyone be tortured and killed on his watch. Not after Afghanistan, not ever. He still had morals after all, contrary to popular belief. 

He placed his palm against the door, leaning closer still and trapping Tony in place. Tony could feel his breath hitching, chest burning with lack of oxygen as he tried to control the urge to punch the sorcerer away. 

Or pull him closer.

Before having to choose, however, the distant sound of screams reached his ears, and he immediately growled, grabbing the sorcerer by his shoulders and throwing him away, pushing him against the chaise which finally broke under the weight of the two men thrown onto it. 

The wood creaked and snapped, but Tony didn’t care, eyes solely on the sorcerer’s body in the middle of the ruins, his own arms on his throat and keeping him down. 

“I’m quite enjoying this turn of events,” Stephen had the audacity to _purr_, riling Tony up even further and making him yank the sorcerer back up a little to slam him down once more for good measure. 

“What did you do?” He growled, the smile still on the sorcerer’s face making his blood boil. He had been played and he hated himself for having made it so easy. 

“Me?” Stephen asked, feigning innocence as his blue eyes flashed with mirth, “I have an alibi, your honour.”

He checked his watch, confused as to why he hadn’t gotten any distress messages only to find it had somehow been silenced.

“You were just distracting me. Should have known,” Tony spit out, angrier at himself at this point. 

“Why didn’t you?” The sorcerer asked, voice getting tight with how hard Tony was pressing into his neck, yet his eyebrows cocked smugly. “Could it be you were finally warming up to my company?”

“Fuck you,” Tony spat, pressing down further before releasing and stumbling away from Stephen, getting up and heading towards the door, ripping it open to run back to the event hall. 

It was mostly empty by now, though remnants of a fight were clearly visible. Some walls had crumbling holes in them, and more than one of the chandeliers were lying shattered on the floor. Steve and Nat were talking in the middle of the room, faces grim and angry, and they turned towards him as he entered the room.

“What happened?”

“Sorcerer’s infiltrated, trying to steal some artefacts from the vault downstairs. Thor recognised one of them and a fight broke out.” Nat explained, eyes piercing his. Her expression seemed calm, admittedly a little harder than usual, but Tony knew she was angry. 

“Where were you?” Steve levelled at him, anger clear in his voice as he glared at Tony as if all of this was his fault. He hadn’t wrecked the room. He hadn’t picked a fight with the sorcerers in the middle of a crowded ballroom. He would have known better. 

“Strange ambushed me in the hallway earlier. Kept me busy.”

“Why didn’t you notify us?” Steve asked accusingly, and Tony had to fight from rolling his eyes at him. He would have to roll over again and show his belly, accept the lecture and hopefully get home soon. 

Fuck all of them. He was too angry, fire still boiling his veins. 

“I said he kept me busy. As in kept me from alerting anyone, obviously. You think he’s an amateur? He’s been handing us our asses for months but now suddenly I should have been able to defeat him on my own?” Tony ground out, uncaring about angering the captain anymore. “_Someone_ made me leave behind my suits.”

Steve scoffed, annoyance flaring behind his eyes at the accusation, but apparently Tony had made a point, because he shut up for once and turned away, walking towards the door. Natasha sent Tony one last considering look before following him at the heels. 

The other Avengers that had been in the room watched him before heading out as well. He almost preferred their suspicious glances over the pitying look he received from Scott. Rhodey was no where to be found, probably outside talking to whichever authorities had showed up. 

As soon as the earth was safe, he would burn the Avengers Initiative to the ground.


	3. tennessee

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Didn't post this on Tumblr but decided I might as well add it here as a bit of extra context

Tony didn’t like losing, but he knew when to admit defeat.

The Avengers were strong, but the sorcerer had mere strength in numbers; enhanced weren’t made every day after all, and the sorcerer’s could recruit anyone they’d want. Magic and power, a strong incentive for anyone.

Wanda had already moved to the other side. _Willingly,_ however much the team liked to claim she had been taken.

She hadn’t actively fought against them, just disappeared into their organisation. Tony wanted to hate her for it, but could he really blame her? They could teach her how to control and hone her powers, and being a villain wasn’t anything new to her.

The thought of ever facing her on the battle ground again made his blood run cold, but this far she hadn’t shown herself. It was but a small relief, as it only haunted his nightmares thinking of how powerful she would return.

He was glad, that at least he wasn’t forced to be around her. The few weeks she had been at the tower had been torture, no matter how much she tried to avoid him and he her, he could still feel her presence. Of course no one had listened to his protests about her joining the team, and he knew somewhere somehow Steve blamed him for her betrayal. Didn’t he always?

Yet he couldn’t just give the sorcerers everything they wanted. Their goals and plans weren’t always clear, but he needed to try. Every time they had to battle the sorcerer’s they lost, but the team still had the naive idea that someday their strength would win against their _literal magic_.

Tony didn’t actually mind though. It was a great distraction, a good reason to get out of the compound, and the way his teammates were a little more humbled at the end of the day, a little less smug and a little weaker.

It still always fell on him.

Somehow always the last one standing, the best protected, yet never managing to finish their opponents off. If he could just deliver the final blow, exploit their weaknesses,…

“Mr. Stark?”

“Yeah, kid?” Tony asked, looking away from the trees sliding by to glance at Peter next to him.

“Exactly how smart is Harley?” The teen asked, visibly worrying his lip even as he tried to look casual.

Tony had spoken at a conference in Nashville. He hated speaking for a bunch of stuffy business men, avoided them if possible with excuses of varying degrees of ridiculous. He even especially hated Nashville, dreadful city, but he had chosen this convention purposefully.

It got him a pass out of the tower and away from the team for a while. Something he very much needed.  
  
Even better; he could skip out on part of the conference and head down to little old Rose Hill to meet up with an old friend.

He was excited to see Harley again after all these years. They had kept in touch, Tony helping him work out his ideas and teaching him more about the suits and AI’s. He had probably been one of the only people besides Rhodey and Pepper who had actually cared about JARVIS’ death.

He liked the kid - teen now - but he hadn’t actually had a time to visit. Contact in general had watered down a bit after the Ultron fiasco. He missed his snark and quips as much as he missed Peter’s excited rambling when he wasn’t around, and it gave both teens a great opportunity to meet. 

“Well he was pretty brilliant when we met and he’s had a few years to work in a real top of the art lab, so pretty smart I’d say,” Tony smirked, watching the worrying ripple through the rest of the kids face. He rolled his eyes fondly, reached up his hand to ruffle Peter’s hair. “Don’t worry, kid, he’s excited to meet you. Wants to know about your webs so you’ll have something to talk about.”

Relief smoothed out his features, but Tony could still see his hands twitch slightly. It was just regular nerves however, and Tony was certain the worry would disappear as soon as the teens would start rambling about who knows what.

They stopped in front of the familiar house before long, smile already plastered across his face before he’d even stepped out of the car. Peter followed a little more subdued, and Tony’s grin only widened when he noticed the teen already waiting for them in front of the garage.

“You’ve grown, squirt.”

“You’ve shrunk.”

“Haha,” Tony rolled his eyes, already reaching out to envelop Harley into a hug. The teen seemed surprised by the movement, but wrapped his arms around Tony in turn.

When he pulled back he motioned Peter over, the fifteen year old watching the older teen nervously. He placed a comforting arm around his shoulder as he pointed towards Harley.

“Peter, this is Harley.”

Peter sputtered out a nervous ‘hi’ and shook Harley’s hand, the oldest teen looking at the spider in amusement. He had grown quite a lot, almost as tall as Tony by now, but he still looked like Harley. Curly hair a little darker than a few years back, and shorter around the ears, but eyes just as blue.

They moved into Harley’s lab. Another reason why Tony had decided to make the trip now; he needed some decent lab time with people that didn’t get on his nerves every five seconds. He didn’t mind Bruce, but he wasn’t considered good supervision so a third party was still always present. He hated it. They always were so subtle about it as well, pretending to just hang out instead of obviously keeping an eye on him.

Every time he complained about it they pretended he was paranoid and that they just wanted to spend time in the lab themselves.

Being in the lab with Peter and Harley immediately helped clear his mind, relaxing him to his core for the first time in a while.

As expected, both teens quickly grew used to each other, talking before long about things Tony couldn’t follow. Tony didn’t mind, content to listen to their rambling while working on his own project.

He had been able to work on some aspects of it at the lab or during the few snatches of unsupervised minutes. All schematics and data neatly hidden away where even Nat wouldn’t be able to find it. The big work - assembling everything - would be impossible to accomplish without anyone asking questions.

“Peter, can you help me with this please? Harley can work on the AI codes, right, kid?” he glanced up at Harley who nodded excitedly, immediately moving to the laptop to start working.

“What do you want me to do?” 

“Just check everything over and tell me if something’s off.”

“Alright.”

Tony turned to Peter, careful to leave to front of the suit he was working on hidden as he showed Peter the wiring inside, explaining to him how everything worked and what still needed to be done.

It was efficient, working with the two teens, and he couldn’t help pride bustling in his chest as he realised how brilliant these kids truly were. Sometimes it was hard to remember that not every kid knew basic coding before learning to write their name and that most kids barely accomplished anything by the age of 25.

These kids were geniuses, and perhaps if they’d grown up in the same environment as him they would have already taken over the world by now.

Okay, perhaps a little over the top, but he was proud, nonetheless.

“Alright, I think that’s it,” Tony proclaimed with a huge grin as he had checked over the final wire. Harley confirmed the AI should be completely functional, and was already excited about testing her out.

“Cool! Are you going to tell us what it is, now?” Peter whined, looking about ready to burst out of his skin in excitement. Tony grinned at him and leaned forward over the table, grabbing the edges of the suit.

“You ready?” Both teens nodded, Harley curious and Peter excited, and his smile widened as he flipped the suit around to show the front of Peter’s new suit.

“Wait, is that - ?” Peter started, looking at it with wide eyes.

“Jup,” Tony let out, popping the p as he smoothed out the fabric. “I got sick of seeing you running around in your pyjama’s.”

“They’re not py - thank you mister stark!” Peter cut himself off glancing between the suit and Tony in awe.

Tony rolled his eyes, tired of watching Peter squirm in excitement and handed the suit to him. “Here, put it on and try it out. We’ll still need to upload the programming and the AI will only be accessible after you’ve completed the training protocol but at least it’s better protection than what you have now.”

Peter grabbed the suit in excitement, almost stumbling over himself when he tried to pull off his shoes. Tony took a moment to glance at Harley, who was watching them with a soft smile.

“I also have something for you, don’t worry.” Tony smiled as Harley raised a curious eyebrow at him. “Well don’t actually _have_ anything. But instead of _giving_ you your own AI, I’m going to teach you to make one.”

_“Wait_,” Harley looked at him in confusion, “Really?? What for?”

Tony shrugged with a small smile, “you tell me, kid. I had an AI years before I became Iron Man. They can help you around the lab, when working on projects, or serve as protection. That’s the fun in making your own: you can code them for anything.”

Tony took a minute to think that over, “well except world destruction, domination, genocide, stealing candy from babies, and so on and so forth. I can and will take it away from you.”

Harley rolled his eyes, already used to Tony’s antics and Tony knew the kid was way too good to actually hurt a fly. Well at least without being provoked.

The teen walked around the table to throw his arms around Tony, and this time it was his turn to be taken aback. He happily squeezed back, however, up until a twatting sound caught his attention.

A web was stuck to the wall an inch from where Harley and Tony were standing, and he turned his head towards Peter. He was watching Tony sheepishly from where he’d been toying with his web shooters, hiding his hands behind his back as if Tony hadn’t already caught him.

“See, now that’s what we’re not going to do.”

The voice of FRIDAY informing him of an incoming call was enough to distract him, and he groaned internally at the name flashing on his glasses. 

“Yeah cap,” he answered with all the politeness he could muster, “it better be something good cause this is my day off.”

“You have to come back now. The sorcerers are planning something.”

“The sorcerers are always planning something. Call me when something’s actually going on.” He moved to end the call before he lost his nerve, annoyance clear in his tone.

“Stark, listen to me,” Captain spoke, authority waving through the small receiver in Tony’s ear. Tony hated himself for it but stopped in his tracks nonetheless. “Camera’s spotted one of them near the Brooklyn bridge. we have to stop them.”

“How come you have a small army of people in New York right now but I’m so desperately needed? I’m sure you can lose this once on your own.” _Or will you not have anyone to blame for your defeat then?_ Stark thought to himself. He didn’t want to seem too upset in front of the teens, but the captain was working wonders on his nerves.

_“_You really care more about your ‘day off’ than helping people?”

Tony felt like ripping the captain’s head off, and he died a little inside because it worked every time. He hated that the captain always knew what buttons the press.

It almost made him not want to go. Defiant till the end. But he had to, he knew he did. Not going will only make things worse with the team later and he didn’t quite feel like dealing with that today.

“I’ll be there.” He replied before curtly ending the call and turning towards the teens.

“I have to go. Peter, Happy will take you to the hotel for tonight and I should be back tomorrow morning to make the trip back to New York. Harley, I’m so sorry for cutting this trip short. I promise we will start on your AI soon. Still on for Thursday video chats?”

“You’re on,” Harley smiled, disappointment well hidden.


	4. tighter

The sorcerers were elusive. They never spoke of their plans, never showing a regular pattern, no connection between the things they stole or destroyed. 

At times when it seemed like they had figured out their motives, reports came in later about artefacts having been stolen or an important figure having been killed somewhere else. It didn’t help that Strange set out attacks just to draw Tony out, therefore complicating the puzzle they were trying to piece together.

It was infuriating, and Tony desperately hoped this attack had meaning or he’d actually have to kill Strange for interrupting his time with the teens.

He arrived in Brooklyn late, but by how much, Tony wasn’t sure. The amount of damage already done to the surrounding structures would suggest they had been going for a while, but for the Avengers all it really took was five minutes. 

He let the annoyance about his careless teammates fuel him as he surveyed the battle, sorcerers and Avengers spread out over a few blocks. 

It was mainly concentrated by the entrance to the bridge, at least, the space a little more open than the more residential center. 

Nat was in the street, fighting a sorcerer they had gotten to know as Mordo, distracting him as Clint tried to take aim from a nearby building. 

The arrow would have hit its mark, but it dissipated into thin air as it came too close to the sorcerer. He glanced behind him with a manic grin before tossing Clint back from his place on the roof with a simple spell, his groan of pain clear despite the loud noises of battle around them. 

Nat grit her teeth and tried stepping up her game, but the sorcerers were too fast and she was a fool for trying to fight them with bare hands and weapons that couldn’t penetrate their shields. 

Tony looked over the rest of the battle ground, skipping over Hill and Sam and glancing towards Thor. Thor was the most equipped to deal with the sorcerers. Even they weren’t immune to lightning, and he always managed to keep some of them busy on trying to deflect his strikes. 

His eyes settled when he finally found Strange, however, fighting against Steve. 

Well, fighting - it was more like a matador messing with a bull. 

Steve was clearly angry, muscle strain visible from Tony’s spot in the sky as he attacked and attacked and attacked while Stephen just danced around him, hands moving through the air in fluid movements as he easily sidestepped Steve’s lunges. It was distracting how graceful the sorcerer was, robes curling around him as he moved in sync with his cloak. 

Tony landed behind Stephen, blaster pointed at the back of his head and ready to deflect any attacks on his person. 

He wondered how Stephen would fight today. Would he get up close and personal, using hand-to-hand, or would he dart around, spells following in quick succession as he toyed with the engineer. Either way Tony knew it was going to be maddening, that the sorcerer would know exactly how to drive him up the wall. 

“You better have a good reason for forcing me out here,” he ground out, pulling the sorcerer’s attention to him. Stephen turned with a smile, cloak waving at Tony in excitement. “This was my day off.”

“Oh good, you made it!” Stephen grinned, completely abandoning his fight with Steve to stalk over towards Tony, not minding the weapons aimed at him. The Captain glared at Tony, trying once more to throw his shield at Stephen, who deflected without even looking. 

“I’m already pissed off as it is, Strange, don’t make things worse for yourself,” Tony snarled, keeping his gaze fixed on the sorcerer.

“But things keep getting better and better!” Stephen purred, winking at Tony as he let his eyes roam over Tony’s body. It was a ridiculous movement, purely for show as he was completely covered in the same armour Stephen had known for months. 

Scoffing, he fired up his weapons, Stephen throwing up shields to block the attack, before using his sling ring to get away.

Tony cursed, but it wasn’t surprising. The bastard was slippery, waving through space easily and making Tony’s head spin, seemingly being at multiple places at once. 

A hand on his shoulder warned him, before Stephen pressed a kiss to the cheek of his mask and darted away again, disappeared into another portal. 

Tony stumbled back in bewilderment, turning around towards where he’d last been with a growl. Surveying the area around him, he tried to see where the sorcerer had run off to, angry that he always managed to get so close. It wasn’t the first time Stephen darted closely just to run a hand over his back or side, the teasing touches infuriating Tony even further. It made Tony wish he’d just fucking end him right then and there, instead of showcasing how powerless he was against magic. 

It was frustrating, getting toyed with, with the sorcerers’ skills and magic winning over their brute force every time. There was always something new, something surprising that threw them off their rhythm. And Strange was the worst of all, being extra annoying just for the sake of it. Teasing and flirting and messing with Tony’s mind. 

He almost preferred him angry and merciless, so he would finally stop messing around and get to the point. At least when he was angry he was less calculated, driven by rage clouding his intelligent mind. 

He recognised the sparks of an opening portal to his left and smirked, ready to try out the newest addition to his suit. 

The metal whips sprung out before the portal had even fully formed, clasping around the sorcerer as he stepped through and yanking him off-balance. 

Vanko had been onto something, but Tony couldn’t deny they were inspired by Stephen’s. They were more agile, more easily to control than Vanko’s were, and Tony wouldn’t have cared for them at all if not for throwing it in Stephen’s face. Showing him he could adapt, could get better, and would find better and better ways to fight against them. That he would never stop fighting him until one day he would win, he would defeat the sorcerer once and for all. 

Stephen yelped in surprise, and Tony grinned in satisfaction as he pulled the whips towards him. The metal retracted into his suit until Stephen was standing in front of him, the remaining ropes around his throat and arms keeping him from doing magic. 

“Well, well, how the tables have turned,” Tony smirked, sure it was clear enough in his voice. The sorcerer was watching him in amusement however, despite his predicament, making Tony’s stomach twist. His blue eyes sparkled with mirth, the grey streaks in his hair striking from this close even as his face remained unfairly young. 

“Shame, Stark, tie me up properly or not at all,” he tutted, leaning his head forward towards him, trying to close the distance between them even as the metal dug further into his neck. Tony’s gaze flicked to the pale stretch of the sorcerer’s throat, before glaring back into his eyes. “Come on, sweetheart, you can pull them tighter; I can take it.”

Tony shook his head in disbelief, exasperation at the sorcerer’s theatrics bubbling underneath his skin. The moment of confusion was all Stephen needed however, and Tony realised his mistake as soon as he saw the smirk crawl onto Stephen’s face. 

The sorcerer, tied with his hands behind his back and held in place by the ropes around his neck, jumped up, wrapping his legs around Tony’s waist in one swift movement. 

The motion shocked Tony enough to loosen the ropes, but instead of ducking away, Stephen only leaned closer, wrapping his freed arms around Tony’s neck. Tony stumbled back, trying to get away from the sorcerer, even as his hands grabbed at Stephen’s thighs to steady him on instinct. 

Stephen sat comfortably, smirking at Tony who was starting to heat up in his suit. “Now if you take off the mask, we can have some real fun.”

Why did Stephen’s voice always have to be so low and smooth, making Tony’s head spin and distracting him from the matter at hand? Couldn’t his voice be just as grating and annoying as the sorcerer himself? It must be the world’s cruelest punishment, designed to make Tony suffer even more. 

Tony growled and tossed him off, firing up his thrusters to get away from the frustrating bastard. He floated in the air, Stephen not taking long to join him with his cloak fluttering gracefully in the wind. A small pout was visible as he booed Tony, but Tony’d had enough. 

He shouldn’t even be here. If it wasn’t for Stephen, he wouldn’t have had to cut his time in Tennessee short. He needed to end whatever the sorcerer was planning, had seen enough of him for a lifetime. 

“Can anyone tell me why they’re here?”

No one answered him, and he rolled his eyes before looking around to figure it out himself. 

“FRIDAY, scan the nearby buildings for any sorcerers or anything of importance.” It took the AI a second to complete her scan, during which he continued trying to get a hold of Stephen again, the sorcerer only dodging him, darting around with that infuriating smile of his. 

Steve had moved on to fighting other sorcerers for what use it was going to do, and FRIDAY finally spoke up as he sent Stephen flying with a well-aimed missile. It wasn’t much and he would recover soon enough, but at least it brought some spark of satisfaction, knowing he wasn’t completely powerless against the sorcerer, that Stephen was still human and therefore still susceptible to injury. 

“There was a call to the authorities about a disturbance at a mansion a few blocks away,” FRIDAY’s Irish lilt rang through his speakers, “eye witness describe sorcerer activity.”

He turned in the direction FRIDAY pointed him, but the smirk on Stephen’s face showed he was already too late. 

“Too bad we finished early,” he sighed dramatically, “but I’ll make sure to see you soon, Stark.” He winked at Tony and disappeared along with the other sorcerers. 

Gritting his teeth, he hurried over to the building, already scared of what he would find. The front door of the house was already blown off, when Tony got there, people crowding around the place to see what the commotion was about. 

Apparently, a collector lived there, the sorcerers having taken some artefacts and burning whatever was left. Luckily, most inhabitants had been smart enough to stay out of the sorcerers’ way, but the bodyguard of the family hadn’t been so humble. 

It made his stomach twist, thinking of Happy, knowing that if he’d been in the same scenario, he would have jumped into danger no matter how much more powerful his opponent was. Happy was stubborn like that. 

Tony landed on the street outside, listened to the people’s explanations about what had happened and gave his condolences. He hated how he had failed, how they always seemed to fail. It was too easy for the sorcerer to keep them busy, overpowering the Avengers by their sheer strength in numbers. 

“If you hadn’t stopped to flirt with him you could have blasted his head off before he’d even turned around!” Steve had stopped next to him, arms crossed as he too glared at the building, flicking an accusing glance at Tony. 

Tony didn’t comment, trying to keep his temper under control and not let the fire consume him from the inside. 


	5. arrhythmia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The comments I'm receiving on this fic are officially the best ever so thanks for anyone who's left something both here as on Tumblr! 
> 
> Originally posted on Tumblr @funkylittlebidiot

“Tony, we need to talk.”

Tony didn’t even look up from his work. He knew it infuriated the captain, but he didn’t care, wouldn’t let himself be bossed around his own lab.

He was already barely allowed five minutes of peace at a time before someone came to bother him and he wasn’t allowed to put up restrictions.

The entire building is everyone’s home after all, and they should be able to reach him at all times for if there were something to go wrong. Being antisocial and locking yourself away won’t help the team dynamic; they should be able to trust everyone in their safe spaces.

It was bullshit, Tony knew, but what could he do?

After Ultron, having his own unsupervised lab was officially vetoed by Steve, and even if there had been a vote it would have been unanimous.

“I’m working.”

“It’s important,” Steve insisted, walking closer to stand in front of the table Tony was working on, arms crossed in that stance that screamed of his superiority complex.

“So is this,” Tony countered, reaching over to grab the wrench as he focussed his attention on FRIDAY. His suit had been damaged during the mission from earlier in the day, and he wanted to get it fixed before some other idiots (Stephen) decided to attack. “Are those test results in yet, baby girl?”

“Not yet, boss, still running.”

“Perfect, so you have a minute.” Steve spoke up. Tony rolled his eyes, finally looking up and piercing his annoyed gaze.

“You still here?” He was already in a sour mood as it was. They had finished today’s mission without too much problem, yes his suit had gotten damaged but it was the only thing that had even gotten any scrapes at all. It had been a clean mission, and he should be glad for a job well done.

Then why, he couldn’t help but wonder, did he keep messing up against the sorcerers? They failed most times, _Tony_ failed most times. Their magic shouldn’t be that much harder to beat than HYDRA weapons and alien tech. Tony had so many ideas on how the could inhibit them from doing magic in battle, to protect themselves and other but he kept letting himself get distracted.

The sorcerer too easily got under his skin, and it was absolutely infuriating Tony.

“Your childish behaviour is doing none of us any favours. You need to start being more of a team player.”

Tony couldn’t help the scowl falling over his face. He was already beating himself up enough as it was and now Rogers dared blaming_ him_ for their pathetic teamwork?

How fucking _dare_ he?

He was nothing but courteous, always putting his own misgivings aside to work as a team during missions.

Yes, things didn’t always work out according to plan, and Tony - they _all - _had to step up their game if they wanted to defeat the sorcerers. But unlike Rogers’ implications, he wasn’t a child. He knew the importance of what they were doing, and wasn’t going to risk innocent lives because he didn’t get along with his colleagues.

That he would even imply otherwise was enough for Tony’s ears to start ringing.

“Listen up, _cap,_” he started, Steve was already sighing, knowing Tony was going to throw another one of his ‘tantrums’. Tony hated it, hated how no matter what he did or said, it would always fall on deaf ears. “Perhaps you’d be a better team leader if you weren’t so afraid to own up to your own mistakes.”

“I wouldn’t expect anything better from you, though,” he continued, itching to hit the captain where it hurt. To get some kind of indication that he was at least hearing him. “As you didn’t actually get to that part of the military training, huh, _private_ Rogers.”

Tony didn’t regret saying it, even as Rogers eyes met his in fury.

It had made sense in the beginning, having the Captain America become team leader. Tony had been naive and hopeful back then, thinking the world could rally behind the symbol of peace.

But in the end, the world was bigger than just America, and over time Rogers had proven his absolute lack of leader instincts. He always had personal motives that didn’t line up with the greatest good, with the survival of the most people.

And it was impossible to believe how much money Tony has already spent on cleaning up his messes.

“The rest of the team clearly doesn’t think so,” Rogers fired back, leaning closer over the table that separated them, “The actual team members that have earned their spot. So, honestly Tony, I couldn’t care less about your opinion. I already had the support of the only Stark that ever mattered.”

Tony flinched back from the Captain’s word in disbelief, anger crawling through him as a hint of satisfaction shone through Roger’s eyes. It shouldn’t hurt as much as it did. He was absolutely disgusted that after all this time he still struggled with his daddy issues, angry with the captain for the ‘impossible’ standard he’d set for his father’s son. 

He fought for something to say, for anything that would make him win against Steve no matter how petty. A second later, however, he realised the captain had been frozen in place.

He blinked, leaning forward to inspect his face, still with that infuriating smile, hard around his lips. Tony poked him in the cheek, but absolutely got no reaction, as if he’d suddenly been replaced by a wax statue. “What the-“

“He’s lucky the spell’s reversible,” a tight voice spoke up from behind him, and Tony immediately turned towards the sorcerer, gauntlet forming around his hand as he aimed. Anticipation ran through his veins, and he almost wished the sorcerer to start something so he could take his anger out on him.

Stephen was sitting on a work bench, feet dangling in front of him as he leaned back on his hands and glared at Steve. The cloak let go of his shoulders, and Tony yelped as it flew towards him, trying to aim at it without destroying his lab in the process. The fabric was too agile, however, swooping around him to settle on his shoulders and holding on tightly.

He redirected his repulser back to Strange, instead. He was certain he hadn’t heard a portal opening, the sound something so familiar by now that it should have been a Pavlovian response to turn around. “How the fuck did you get in here? And what is your bratty bedsheet doing?”

Yelping as the Cloak slapped him over the head, he continued glaring at Stephen.

“Be nice, it likes you,” Stephen drawled out as he flicked his gaze to Tony.

He squinted his eyes at the sorcerer, his attention putting him on edge. “That still doesn’t answer my first question.”

“Oh, Stark, cute of you to think your silly tower is safe from me.” Stephen smiled, and it was so genuine it made Tony’s cheeks heat up.

In anger of course.

The tower was highly secure, it wasn’t Tony’s fault that he hadn’t figured magic out yet. That he hadn’t had any time or way to figure out the science behind it and adjust his technology accordingly. “In contrast to our dear captain over there, however, I know not to force my presence on others.”

_Did everyone have to be so fucking infuriating?_ “If you’re not forcing your presence on me right now, then what are you doing?”

Stephen raised an eyebrow and glanced at the ceiling in thought. Tony could breathe for a second with his eyes no longer on him, the tightness in his chest easing slightly. “Touché, guess my contempt got the best of me. See I don’t like people messing with what’s mine.”

“I’m not yours,” Tony growled, but dropped his glove, feeling ridiculous still holding it up while it seemed to have zero effect on the sorcerer.

“A man can dream,” Stephen sighed, dropping his gaze back to Tony to run an appreciative glance over his body. He shifted uncomfortably, fingers twitching at his side as he turned away from him.

Perhaps not the best move, exposing his back to his enemy, but the blasted cloak was still on his shoulders anyway.

His heart sped up as he could hear the sorcerer jumping down from the table, glancing back to see what he was doing. He was just walking around however, surveying the different projects he’d been working on as he slowly made his way towards Tony. Tony watched him in silence, curious as to what he would do, what his plan was. There had to be an ulterior motive to him being here, though there was literally nothing Tony could think of that the sorcerer could be interested in.

Well except for himself, of course.

“Shouldn’t you be off doing evil?” Tony eventually asked, no longer able to keep the question to himself, folding his hands over his chest and leaning against the table.

“Not until later tonight,” Stephen hummed, stopping to pet DUM-E’s claw. Tony raised his eyebrow at the movement. No one ever acknowledge the bots except for him and Rhodey.

His attention quickly snapped back towards his actual words, however. “What?”

Stephen gave him a pointed look, rolling his eyes softly at him. Softly? Not a word Tony would have ever expected to use to describe Stephen. He was all harsh movements and harsher words, whether they were flirtily directed at Tony or used in anger against his teammates. Tony found the softness suited him, lighting his eyes up and smoothing out his features. “I’m kidding. You can rest easy tonight. You look like you can use it.”

“You insulting me? That’s a first,” Tony smirked. He knew he looked terrible. Had barely slept five hours in the last two days, but he’d been busy. Steve had decided they needed extra training - they did - but as he still had some responsibility at SI and he also needed to update everyone’s gear he was stretched thin.

“Don’t worry,” Stephen smirked right back, stopping in front of Tony. Tony glanced up at him, feeling every inch of height difference between them. Curse his father’s genes.

Stephen leaned forward and Tony froze.

They were already standing unnecessarily close, his scent overwhelming his senses, and he had to fight his own body not to lean into it. His weak heart had to be the cause of the arrhythmia he experienced, there was no other explanation.

The sorcerer’s lips passed his own, however, his hand cupping his ear like a fifth grader sharing a secret. “You’re still the most enchanting person in the multiverse.”

Tony hated the shiver running down his spine.

Biting his lip, he let the familiar anger course through him as his hands clutched tightly at his side. Stephen leaned back, incessant smirk sparkling in his eyes, and Tony had reached his limit.

With a swift movement, he used his elbow to push Stephen back, forcing more distance between the two of them. He let his gauntlet shift into a blade, pushing it against Stephen’s throat as he growled. 

“Get out of my lab.”

The sorcerer didn’t let it dampen his spirits, glancing down at Tony with a pleased expression, before motioning for the cloak to return to him.

“Probably for the best,” Stephen sighed, glance filling with disgust as it flicked towards Rogers. “Too much time passes and they start asking annoying questions.”

His eyes turned hopeful as he looked back at Tony, still pressing the knife against his skin, with a questioning eyebrow raise. “Unless you want to keep him like this? Personally I think it’s horrible for the decor but we could move it?”

Tony glared at Stephen, only slightly tempted to agree. “Turn him back.”

“Fine,” Stephen sighed, regrettably, “Later Stark.”

Tony watched him disappear from underneath his fingertips, no portal this time, before glancing around the empty lab with something akin to regret. Brushing it off, he retracted the blade and turned his gaze towards Steve, still frozen in place.

He sighed, turning to stand back in front of his workspace and glancing down at his mask.

A frown fell over his face however, when an invisible hand seemed to draw a pink heart on the cheek of his faceplate. Once the heart was completed, the little drawing started moving, beating like a normal heart would, except for the soft stutter every few seconds. He glanced around in bewilderment, before burying his head in his hands and groaning into them.

Leave it to the sorcerer to frustrate him to the bone, always toying with him in more and more unexpected ways. He had to breathe in deeply a few times to shake the annoyance out of his skin, and barely looked up when he heard Steve shift in front of him.

He grabbed his helmet and left the lab without a word to the captain, too angry and frustrated to bother with him right now. 

That infuriating_ asshole_**_._**


	6. playing with fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for everyone leaving comments! I really hope you like this chapter as well and more fun stuff is definitely to come

Everything was becoming too much. 

He was running himself ragged, he knew. To get the team’s approval, the public’s approval and most important of all, his own. 

With every moment of peace, every dot of light on the horizon being ripped to shreds as soon as he thought he was improving. 

He’d been trying all week to get that stupid heart off his helmet. Had to use an old suit in a fight against the sorcerers a few days ago because for the life of him he wouldn’t give Stephen the satisfaction of wearing the heart on his cheek. 

Yet when he thought he had finally done something - created a whole new bleeding edge suit that would not only be without magical graffiti but would surely help him in battle, help them in defeating the sorcerers, help them in protecting civilians more successfully - the others only saw fear. Fear of what his new inventions could do, that it would be uncontrollable. 

Tony couldn’t help but scoff; he had things under control. He always had control over his technology. 

Perhaps unaware of what others were doing with it, in the past, but there was a reason he wasn’t mass-producing his new tech. He knew about his failures, was painfully aware of them, had to live with them every single day. 

Yet, if this was solely for him to use, solely for making the world a better place on Tony’s terms, why could the team not see it as something good? Why break him down, shove their distrustful little hands into anything that gave Tony a slither of happiness and make it about them? 

About their fears and Tony’s past mistakes. 

The team, Stephen, his own pathetic failures… they were all becoming too much. 

He was reaching his limit, ready to boil over. To fly too high and crash into the ocean. 

He needed something to rip apart, something to hit his frustration out on, but he had nothing safe to blow up on the roof and he was not so angry that he’d risk getting people hurt. 

Ideally he could head down to the training room to work out his anger there, maybe beat up a punching bag even Steve shouldn’t be able to kick through. 

But he didn’t want anyone to see him. He didn’t want to even _think_ about his teammates. 

He wanted to do something to piss them all off. Most of all Steve. He felt like some rebellious teenager, thrown back to skipping his dad’s important events to get pissed at a club instead. 

He needed that. Needed that rush of doing something he _knew_ would get him in trouble. Needed to be in control of the situation. Have Steve yell at him for something he did purposefully for once. Wanted to feel smug and reckless and like a goddamn adult making his own decisions without having to apologise for them. 

“New suit?” A voice asked from behind him, bored and languid, the perfect fuel to Tony’s already open flame. “Looks good on you.”

He swivelled around, arms flailing at the movement as he turned angry eyes on the sorcerer. Tony could see the sorcerer’s interest spike slightly, clearly not having expected the harsh reaction. 

He was not flying, instead standing a little further away, cloak nowhere to be spotted. His arms were crossed, leaning against one of the antennae stationed on the roof. Tony still felt the fire lapping away at his skin, heating up even more with the second. 

He hated the sorcerer’s perfect posture, his lean legs leading up to slim hips and broad shoulders, the way his hair was always perfectly in place. The way his expression was always so different yet so infuriating still. 

He didn’t know what he himself looked like. A mess probably. Angry and pissed off, nanotech suit covering only half of his body because he needed to feel the cold February air against his bare arms. Hair tangled from working in the lab all day, and muscle shirt soaked in sweat. 

He stalked up to him, every step making his heart speed up in determination. 

Stopping right in front of the sorcerer, he glared up at him, hating the fact that the sorcerer was taller than him and how fucking blue his eyes were in the dark of the night. 

Stephen just raised a curious eyebrow at him, the usual off-battle boredom returned and pushing Tony over the edge. 

He hated him. Hated the sorcerer for always winning, always besting him and using him like a puppet to play with. Hating him for making his skin itch uncomfortably, for being so goddamn infuriating. 

Stephen squinted down at him, angry suspicion starting to crawl over his own features. “What did they do?” he demanded, almost a soft growl in his fury, mirroring Tony’s own. 

God he was fucking maddening. 

At the very least he could take satisfaction from surprising the sorcerer. 

“Shut up,” he growled back, before he took the last step separating the two of them and grabbed him by the collar, yanking him down into an angry kiss. 

Stephen stalled in surprise, which had Tony smirking against him, lapping into his mouth even further. A low moan was the response, sending reverberations down Tony’s spine in bliss. The angry fire in his core only heating up even more, pulling and pushing like tidal wave as it coursed through him, making him push himself further against the sorcerer. 

He tried reaching for more heat still, more touch, more rough softness as he let go of his collar and let his hand trail up to Stephen’s neck. Keeping him in place as he pulled him down against him, allowing him to taste deeper, touch harder, until every thought was out of his mind. Every regret and mistake of the past dissolving under the sorcerer’s tongue. 

Stephen growled against his lips, pushing back into him, but Tony refused to give up control however.

He was in charge. His terms. His decision. His self-destructive behaviour.

Usually, he hated how attracted he was to the sorcerer, but now he was making the most of it. Enjoying having the powerful man under his fingertips, at his mercy for as long as the illusion lasted. 

His mouth tasted like red wine and something salty, and his hands roamed his torso, dispelling any and all thoughts from Tony’s mind. 

At the back of his head he could hear something about consent, but the sorcerer seemed eager enough, and Tony knew he was powerless to force him into anything. He only had control now because Stephen was letting him have it. He wasn’t a complete idiot, after all; knew the sorcerer could dominate him without second thought.

Stephen pulled back eventually, putting but a breath of distance between them. HIs arms were draped lazily over Tony’s shoulders as he stared at him with an amused smirk. Always that amused smirk. “Stark?”

“I’m going to fuck you now.” Tony gritted out, grabbing the sorcerer by the waist and digging his fingers into his hips as Stephen nodded in agreement. “You’re going to take us somewhere else, and then I’m going to fuck you.”

Stephen perked his eyebrow at the suggestion of moving, probably surprised Tony would even trust him enough to take him away from the tower. Truth is, Tony just didn’t give a shit about his own safety at the moment, and New York rooftops were infested by crawly vigilante’s that he didn’t feel like traumatising. 

Something flashed Stephen’s eyes akin to realisation, immediately chased with a small smirk. Again with the mind reading then. He should be upset about people messing with his head, but he had no discernable proof and he felt clearheaded enough. He didn’t quite care. 

Stephen let go of his neck and pushed him, walking him back a few steps until they were standing in a bedroom, dark furniture filling the space. Tony took a second to look around and search within himself for an ounce of regret, but couldn’t find any. With that confirmation he attacked the sorcerer’s lips again, already missing the touch. 

“Take off the suit,” Stephen ground out between kisses, and Tony complied with a tap against his chest, nano bots retracting into their housing unit. 

The night was harsh, it was angry, fuelled by hatred and primal desire, and for the first time in a long time, Tony felt alive. Felt like he was in charge of his own life and choices. 

Stephen, despite being infuriating in battle and just an all-out asshole, was surprisingly fun in bed, though Tony would never admit it. He took things farther than any of his previous lovers ever dared and he revelled in it. The carelessness of it all, the lack of worry about hurting each other, and Stephen wasn’t shy about voicing his appreciation either. He didn’t necessarily enjoy pain in any context, but they could be rougher, didn’t have to flinch back from forming any bruises. It was exhilarating, just doing whatever they wanted, anger and frustration turning into pleasure and release. 

By the end of the night, Tony was exhausted in all the right ways. His muscles pleasantly strained and skin sticky with sweat. He listened to Stephen’s soft panting next to him, and dared to peak a glance at the sorcerer. He was staring at the ceiling, face devoid of any emotion, cheeks still heated from their earlier exertion. 

Feeling Tony’s eyes on him, he let a smirk crawl onto his face, tilting his head slightly to glance at him. “Don’t get sentimental on me now, Stark.”

Tony huffed, “Hey, I’m not. I just made all _your_ dreams come true.”

Stephen hummed noncommittally, gaze returning to the ceiling, the smug smile staying on his face despite the emptiness of his eyes. “Told you we’d have fun in bed.”

He had. On multiple occasions. In varying degrees of explicit. 

Tony rolled his eyes, earlier bliss starting to fade as his common sense returned to him. He pointed his own stare at the ceiling. The dark wood was starting to lighten along with the sky outside, and Tony was suddenly reminded how he’d ended up there. Where he was, who he was with.

He was - honestly he didn’t know. He had told Stephen to take them away and he had, though where to, Tony wasn’t sure. Most likely to the sorcerer’s base of operations.

Well, that was stupid of him. 

The thought sounded through his head loud and clear, and he immediately jumped up out of bed to stumble around the room, searching for his discarded clothes and cursing his own existence. 

He’d had multiple walks of shame throughout his lifetime - though mostly he was the one being walked away from - but this really topped the cake. 

What kind of _idiot_ goes off to have sex with his enemy? 

Having the heroes out of the way, no matter how attracted Stephen was to him, would only make his life easier. The Avengers were powerful but easily dealt with with magic. Tony had only been protected by Stephen’s attraction to him, and he was pretty sure that same attraction was why they hadn’t just killed his teammates off yet. 

Who was to say what Strange would do now he’d gotten what he wanted? And he was the fool who just gave it to him. 

Stephen was watching him with lazy eyes and Tony glanced at him as his breathing started getting heavier. 

He recognised the symptoms but tried to clamp down on the panic crawling up his spine. Not now. Not here. Not in front of the sorcerer. 

He couldn’t show weakness, had to find a way out of here, but the feeling of being trapped, the imminent feelings of failure were heightening with every breath. He didn’t dare turn back to Stephen, trying to hide the heavy rise and fall of his chest as he grabbed his clothing off the floor. 

He didn’t know what was freaking him out most, Stephen having lead him into a trap somehow or him genuinely not caring at all about Tony being his opponent. That he really had just planned on fucking him and letting him leave to fight him another day and continue this game they had clearly been playing. The game that Tony had let himself be so easily dragged into. 

Not anymore. Taking a deep breath, he turned to face Stephen with a defiant glare, swallowing down any remaining panic. 

Tony could swear Stephen’s gaze wavered slightly, but a second later, Stephen’s piercing blue eyes were gone, along with everything else in the room. 

He blinked against the light of the sun starting to peak over the horizon as he was standing on the roof again. The few pieces of clothing he hadn’t recovered yet were laying at his feet. The only thing missing being his muscle shirt. 

Tony stopped in disbelief as his sigh of relief mixed with a twist of his heart. 

Option two then. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next two parts will be quite short so I'll be posting them together as one chapter. Part one will be posted to my Tumblr either Sunday or Monday evening, and part two (and the update on here) might be later in the week. 
> 
> Tumblr: @funkylittlebidiot


	7. mirro mirror/pillow talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reposted this chapter because I wanted to add something last minute.

“You’re wearing his shirt again.” Wong pointed out, expression subdued as he stared at Stephen through the gaps in the bookcases. It was a useless effort, checking the order in the library, as no sorcerer in their right mind would risk the librarian’s wrath. 

Stephen didn’t have to look down to confirm Wong’s observation. He had chosen the piece of clothing deliberately after all, and he was glad at least that Wong wouldn’t be able to sense the small preservation spell he’d placed on it.

It smelled like Tony, and he’d like to keep it that way.

“And what about it?” Stephen replied, already bored of the conversation as he moved to grab the next book in his ever-growing pile.

Studying usually helped to keep his mind occupied, but over the last few months he’d gotten behind, losing time both by not being able to keep his attention on the books and by wasting time searching out Tony. 

He wasn’t at all interest in his friends’ opinion. Both Wong and Karl had made their thoughts very clear as soon as Stephen’s incessant crush had started.

You think he _wanted_ to be head over heels for his opponent?

Well, it _was_ fun to see how easy it was to rile him up, how flustered his words made the Iron Man even as he tried to hide it. It was fun to know he could say whatever he wanted and tease without repercussions. Tony Stark had become a fun plaything as soon as Stephen had laid his eyes on him.

What could he say; he had a thing for strong men with pretty brown doe eyes who never quite knew to shut up.

Best of all, he didn’t have to worry about getting too involved, because Tony Stark was unobtainable.

Oh what a joke that had become.

His infatuation hadn’t even been his fault.

He’d started teasing Tony because he’d sensed the engineer’s attraction to him. Stark may deny it as much he liked, but Stephen wasn’t blind and knew the man couldn’t help thinking he was hot. He wasn’t going to pretend to be humble about his appearance.

If along the way Stephen’s intrigue had manifested into something more, that was his mistake.

There was something so fascinating about Tony Stark. How there was so much snark in such a tiny body, so much fake bravado mixed with a need for approval. And why the fuck he wasn’t getting any was a mystery to Stephen.

Anyone could see he was the biggest asset the Avengers had.

Perhaps he’d gotten protective, seeing how everyone was treating him, perhaps he liked how his teasing managed to distract the engineer of his troubles. Or maybe he was just vain and shallow, attraction fueled by nothing but his libido telling him Tony Stark was what he needed.

Either way, toying with him was as much of an outlet he was going to get for his feelings.

“You know it can never be more, Stephen,” Wong tutted for the hundredth time. “He’s only a distraction to you. To our cause.”

“We constantly need to adapt our timeline either way,” Stephen waved him off, pretending to skim the next page, “having to go back for a particular book or artefact a week later isn’t going to change the course of history in the long run.”

“You know Mordo is getting more and more annoyed with you.”

“That’s his problem,” Stephen shrugged, “He didn’t seem to mind when it was of use to us. Even the Ancient One hasn’t said anything about it.”

Stephen was done for. Had been for a while.

He just had never expected for his feelings to go deeper than simple attraction. Would have enjoyed a single good fuck with the very alluring superhero and have moved on.

But as the months passed, he found that not only did he lust for the man, he’d stopped enjoying sex with other people, the thought of anyone in his bed that wasn’t Tony appalling. And now he’d experienced first-hand how compatible they truly were, he didn’t think he’d ever want anyone else.

He needed Tony to be his. Wanted him in ways that shouldn’t be possible for him.

He’d never been sentimental, never given a fuck about his partners, but Tony was special, he knew that much.

Didn’t need his third eye wide the fuck open to realize Tony’s importance both to the world and to himself.

He knew Tony was attracted to him, as proven by him finally making the first move, but Stephen wanted more from him.

You could say many things about the evil sorcerer, but he was not delusional. He knew the engineer would never love him the way he did, yet he couldn’t help his own feelings. If fucking was all he was going to get, however, he was going to make the most of it.

At first, the engineer had avoided the roof for a while, instead spending more time in his lab despite the Avengers’ presence. The few times they’d fought each other Tony had remained quiet, even as Stephen had pulled out all the stops. Teased and flirted, using his new obtained information of his likes and dislikes as leverage for the engineer’s attention, yet no dice.

Stephen had contemplated going to search him out first, going to annoy him into caving once more, but Stephen couldn’t. 

Call him a hopeless romantic, but he wanted Tony to come to him. After all he was constantly being manipulated by the Avengers, and Stephen didn’t want to add another person to the list of people using him. He would gladly let Tony use him, instead.

There was also that bit of panic he’d noticed on Tony’s face after. He’d expected anger, sure, but seeing how upset the engineer was had still sent a spike of hurt through him, and by the vishanti he would never admit to that tiny insecurity having worked its way underneath his skin.

Then there were the Avengers, the reason Tony had come to him in the first place.

He swore one day he was going to kill them all. Let Tony be angry at him as much as he wanted just to get those leaches away from his precious love.

His patience had been rewarded, in the end, and it had been a relief when Tony had finally fallen into bed with him a second time. Stephen swore one day he’d stop caring. He’d stop his treacherous heart from getting involved, but it was harder than he had expected. He wanted to touch Tony softly, praise his heart and mind sincerely, so Tony understood how much he truly meant it.

Instead he had to stick to endless teasing, always a hint of snark to hide the truth of his love.

As long as Tony assumed it didn’t go farther than desire, he would be fine.

“He will never understand what we are trying to accomplish.” Wong spoke up once more, pulling Stephen from his thoughts. “Definitely doesn’t approve of the means to our end.”

Stephen knew that, for heaven’s sake.

He stood up, abandoning his books as he glared at his fellow sorcerer. The cloak flew toward him from where it had been exploring the far side of the library, attaching itself to his shoulders at once. He turned his back to Wong in annoyance, the librarian’s irritated sigh following him as he headed towards the hallway, before opening a portal to the Avengers’ tower.

The mirror dimension must have been a stalker’s wet dream. Stephen was very aware he was using it that way at least, so he shouldn’t judge, but he couldn’t help himself.

If Tony could never be his, at least he could have him in his head. 

He was sitting in front of his desk in his room, hologram projected in front of him.

Stephen should have known. It was Thursday, after all, the day of his evening video chats with some teen from Tennessee. 

He took a seat on Tony’s bed, crossing his legs and cupping his cheek with his hand as he watched the engineer. His brown eyes were focused, talking to Harley about AI’s. Stephen knew he’d been trying to teach to kid to code his own for the last couple of weeks, aware that their project should almost be finished by now.

It was intriguing how good Tony was with kids. There was a vigilante running around Queens that Stephen probably shouldn’t know the identity of, and he’d seen Peter sling around with a new suit recently, clearly made by Tony. He didn’t know how Tony kept finding these teenagers, but he was great with them, Stephen couldn’t deny.

Perhaps if Stephen had ever felt the need for children the thought would have pushed him over the edge even more.

He watched as Tony smiled proudly as the first hints of a voice ran through Harley’s garage, and noticed the teen’s own excitement. Tony’s eyes lit up, more vibrant and real than he’d ever seen from him.

Stephen couldn’t help perking up, stretching his legs back out as he got up and made his way towards the desk. He was enthralling, leaning forward slightly to get a better look at the screen, brown eyes scanning the code expertly.

Stephen wished he was able to sit in Tony’s lap, to have the engineer’s focus on him with that same intensity, but perhaps that was taking things too far. Instead, he had to make do with sitting on the desk, facing Tony to get the best view, and let an invisible finger covered in gloves stroke Tony’s cheek.

The flutter of his heart was as unwelcome as ever, but at least he’d get to see him later tonight for real. Would be able to run his hands over his skin as he’d get to pretend to be loved by the most gorgeous man in the multiverse.

\----

Okay, so maybe Tony had started an affair with a super villain.

Did that make him a bad person?

He had tried to resist a repeat performance after their first night, to the point that he’d even avoided going to the roof. The result being he’d have to deal with his teammates more. The frustration building up, along with Stephen’s flirting during battles, had been enough to make him cave, however.

Tony hated how effective the sorcerer’s teasing had become.

Stephen luckily never mentioned their nights in front of the Avengers. He could easily shrug it off and deny it, joke about Stephen not being able to tell dreams from reality, but it would plant seeds of doubt, and Tony could really not afford that right now.

He still always fought him when the sorcerers attacked, stopped him from hurting people and damaging the city too badly. So if at night he waited for him on the roof of the tower, and jumped him as soon as he made an appearance, was that really so bad?

Everyone deserved a little downtime after all.

And Stephen was fun, he was intriguing and didn’t ask many questions. They barely talked, except for the jokes and snarks coming from both sides, and the absolute filth Stephen spewed as soon as they’d gotten a good rhythm going.

He was still as infuriating as ever, however, but Tony loved to channel that pent up energy into a good fuck, the physical strain pulling every ounce of frustration out of his muscles.

It was healthy, he decided, both physically and to fight back the stress that so easily built up during his time with the Avengers. Not sure his cardiologist would count it as a workout routine, but that didn’t really matter anyway. Maybe he should ask? Stephen would probably know, being a doctor and all.

And after all, how could he resist when Stephen was so damn beautiful?

Tony always watched him after sex, using the excuse of post-coital bliss to trace his eyes over his gorgeous features. The way his cheeks dipped, the curl of his lips, the soft expanse of skin by his throat, blotchy and red now due to Tony’s earlier administrations.

Stephen paid him no mind, as usual staring up at the ceiling. Tony often wondered what he was thinking during these moments. His own hatred for the man only returned after he’d been dropped off at the tower again and had gotten some sleep, but Stephen’s face went slack right after.

It was difficult to understand what could be going through his mind. Tony knew his hatred was one-sided, the sorcerer never being shy with his words of admiration or possessive streak, but when it was just the two of them, when he wasn’t playing Tony in the midst of battle or when they weren’t lost in the heat of passion, he was calm, as if lost in thought.

Tony didn’t understand it. And he hated things he didn’t understand.

He was sick of it. Sick of the quiet, sick of the neutrality.

“Why do you hate my teammates so much?”

It was a question that didn’t really warrant an answer, but it got the desired result. Stephen’s face immediately went hard, scoffing up at the ceiling before turning towards Tony with an exasperated eyeroll.

“Because they treat you like garbage.” Stephen said pointedly, locking his eyes with Tony. Tony sighed looking into them, shifting so he was lying on his side and could watch Stephen more easily, pressing his face against the soft pillow that smelt strongly of the sorcerer. “And they complicate my missions.”

“You know,” Tony teased, “at the tower we call your ‘missions’ attacks.”

Stephen hummed uncaringly, moving to look back at the ceiling.

“How do you know I don’t deserve it?” Tony asked quickly, successfully keeping the sorcerer’s blue eyes on him, smiling as Stephen squinted at him.

“Why would you?”

“Because I fucked up and created a super AI that was planning to - and almost succeeded - in destroying the human race.”

Stephen scoffed again at his answer, glaring at Tony. “So if I plan on killing a bunch of people, say a certain Avenger, but something goes wrong and I fail. Does that make me a good person?”

“What?” Tony frowned in bewilderment, lips twisting at the ridiculous question. “No?”

“Of course not, because intentions matter despite the result.” Stephen stated pointedly, eyes flicking away from Tony’s to focus on something behind him. Tony frowned to himself, letting the words sink in. They made sense, logically, but was it really that simple?

“People still got hurt, despite my good intentions, and those people need someone to take responsibility.”

“Why?” Stephen asked, piercing Tony’s gaze with his own once more. “What good will it do their dead loved ones? Your mistakes might be yours, but they’re not always within your control. You’re a fool if you think things are that simple.”

Stephen spoke with such certainty, it was almost contagious. He wanted to believe what he was saying, and knew there was a core of truth in his words. He didn’t want to think this deeply right now, he wanted to continue pretending everything was alright and he was just lying in bed next to some regular hot guy that he’d just had incredible sex with.

“So what happened to Wanda?” Tony asked, hoping his discomfort wasn’t too visible. “We haven’t heard from her since she joined you.”

“Oh don’t worry,” Stephen replied, eyes sparkling with hidden mirth, “she’s safely locked away in the dungeons of Kamar Taj.”

“Wait, what?” Tony frowned, sitting up on his elbow to glare down at Stephen. “So you _did_ kidnap her?”

“Relax, Stark,” Stephen huffed, “she’s there voluntarily. Vishanti forbid she learns from her mistakes.”

“But - Why?” 

“Well, we couldn’t kill her because she might be useful later -”

“That’s not what I meant!” Tony groaned in frustration, sitting up completely and carding his hands through his hair. His heart was starting to speed up, unsure of the cause but being fully aware of the guilt coursing through him. 

“We kept our promise.” Tony glanced back at the sorcerer in confusion. He’d been certain it had been her own choice. He hated her, but he didn’t think he could let her rot there against her will. “If she joined us we would teach her how to control and hone her powers. She’s given books to study and knows that if she tries to escape - which she won’t be able to - we’ll just take her powers away from her. In a few months we’ll review her progress.”

“But why,” Tony asked again, confusion still itching under his skin as he locked eyes with Stephen once more, the sorcerer watching him carefully. “Why bother locking her away at all?”

“She’s dangerous. Her little stunt with Sokovia set the earth on a dangerous path that goes directly at what we were trying to achieve. So, dungeons it is.” Stephen shrugged, tilting his head slightly, “You’re so certain someone needs to take responsibility. Well, it was her, and she’s being punished.”

“I don’t know how to feel about this…”

“Then don’t worry about it; it’s out of your control either way,” Stephen smirked, the sight making Tony burn up slightly. He was right, and Tony couldn’t deny that he felt relieved. The witch hadn’t caused his anxiety issues, but she sure as hell hadn’t helped. He still sometimes woke up in cold sweat, image of Pepper and Rhodey dead on a pile of his mistakes edged into his brain. 

“You’re not torturing her?”

“I could if you want me to-” Stephen cut himself off with a sly grin at Tony’s glare. “No, we are not.”

“She’s there voluntarily?”

“Well, technically she couldn’t leave either way, but she’s not currently being detained against her will.”   
  
Tony stared into Stephen’s eyes, searching for the truth hidden beneath his blue irises, before he relaxed against the mattress once more. “Fine.”

They lay in silence for a while, before Tony couldn’t take it anymore. He needed to be distracted from the witch, from Sokovia, and from the fact that Stephen had done what he’d asked Steve to do months ago. 

“I still miss JARVIS, though,” Tony sighed fondly at the memory of his old friend, hoping to think about something to change to subject, turning to watch Stephen again. 

“Who?” Stephen glared at him in suspicion, making Tony smile slightly at the hint of jealousy.

“My _AI_,” Tony explained, rolling his eyes, “he was destroyed by Ultron when he escaped my lab.”

Stephen nodded in understanding, eyes blinking sleepily and Tony figured it was about time he left. He was exhausted himself. Stephen, the asshole, had attacked some basilisk in Italy earlier in the day and it must already be close to four am. He needed to get some sleep.

“Your AI. He was coding right?”

Tony frowned at the question, but nodded at the sorcerer as he rolled out of bed and stretched his arms over his head. “Duh.”

Stephen sat up a little, leaning onto his elbow as he gave him a pointed look at Tony’s rude answer. He was still lying under the covers, showing no signs of planning to get up any time soon. Tony let himself get distracted at the sight of his bare shoulders, muscled but lean, pale skin expanding under the covers. “Do you still have the chip he was last downloaded onto?”

“Yeah.”

“Give it to me.”

It wasn’t a question, and Tony startled as he glanced back, finally finding his pants on the floor and pulling them on.

“Why?”

“I can bring him back, I think. If you’d want that of course.” Stephen’s bored demeanour had returned, but Tony didn’t pay attention to it this time. The words were of interest however.

“How?”

“Magic.”

“Haha,” Tony rolled his eyes at the cryptic answer, already feeling the hope for the return of his old AI fading, “I don’t need another AI mystery science hybrid.”

“Nothing like that. I promise. I should be able to restore him to right before he was destroyed. Memories and all.” Stephen returned to lying on his back, focusing his gaze back on the ceiling instead of Tony and wrapping his arms under the back of his head. The stretch of his muscles was mesmerising, and Tony had to remind himself to get dressed and get the fuck out of there before the team started asking too many questions.

It was a tantalising prospect. He loved JARVIS. Some people might find that weird, but he had. He had been a friend when he’d had few, a voice of reason, a companion in his most desperate of moments. JARVIS always knew what he needed, knew his self-destructive behaviour better than anyone, had saved his life many times, and could have been the last voice he’d ever heard on multiple occasions.

He missed him. FRIDAY was great, but he was too afraid of letting her close to let her off her leash so to speak. She wasn’t as sentient as JARVIS was. Because that was the truth; JARVIS had basically become a second person, able to think of its own. He’d been his AI for almost twenty years after all.

It would be nice to have another ally at the tower.

“Alright.”


	8. gratitude

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quick note: I read and love all of your comments but don't like responding to them because it feels disgenuine and repetitive, but I do absolutely appreciate them and enjoy reading all of your theories and stuff so thank you!! xx

The lab was calm this early in the morning. The sun was just starting to peak over the horizon, basking the floor in a pink hue as the bots started whirring awake. Tony had returned a little later than usual, to the point that it seemed stupid to go to bed, so he’d decided to finally try out the gift he’d received from Stephen. 

It wasn’t a gift.

A favour.

Whatever it was, Tony couldn’t help hoping Stephen had managed to do it. That he had been speaking the truth when he said that JARVIS could be brought back.

The lab was luckily still empty. Nat and Steve were probably already awake somewhere but hadn’t realised Tony had returned (or in their eyes, had woken up, as they hopefully didn’t know about his nightly disappearances).

He sighed, twiddling with the chip in his hands, nerves twisting in his stomach.

Would it work?

He had been putting off trying it out. Afraid to be disappointed. Afraid of what hearing JARVIS’ voice again would do to him. 

Yet he wanted it.

Taking a deep breath, he moved his hand forward, scanning the chip before being able to halt himself any longer. The scanning took a few seconds. Even with Tony’s highly advanced equipment, JARVIS was still made up out of a lot of data.

It made his heart jump slightly. That it was taking a little longer was promising; it meant there was data on it to explore. What had been left of him after Ultron hadn’t been pretty.

Yet with every extra second, it could mean more complications.

Had it always taken this long? Tony’s heart was beating heavily by the time the system finally beeped in completion, and he held his breath in anticipation. “FRIDAY?”

“JARVIS appears to be fully operational, with his data being similar to his last records before Ultron attacked, Boss.”

“Good Morning, Sir. It appears I have been turned off for a while. It’s currently 6 12 am, April 28th 2016 and the weather in New York is sunny at 42 degrees.”

His eyes were stinging by the time he was finished speaking, tears threatening to spill, and he had to hide his face in his hands as his shoulders were starting to shake.

“I have taken the liberty of sharing my data of the last few years with JARVIS,” FRIDAY spoke up.

“It’s good to be back, sir.”

Tony lifted his head out of his hands to look up at the ceiling, smile splitting his face in two even as he suddenly felt exhausted. “I missed you, JARVIS.” 

“JARVIS?” A confused voice spoke up from the doorway, making Tony jump and sit up straighter. “You brought JARVIS back?”

Tony didn’t know how to answer. He hadn’t been allowed to mess with AI’s anymore, FRIDAY only allowed cause she was already completely functional before Ultron. He could hardly say it had been a gift from - _favour _from Stephen either.

“Just the voice,” Tony lied with a tight smile, hoping his panic didn’t give anything away and praying to god FRIDAY had the good sense to shut the fuck up for now. “For in my suits only. The tower will still be controlled by FRIDAY.”

Steve sent him a suspicious glance, but shrugged before nodding his head towards the hallway. “Come have breakfast with us. Everyone’s already awake but Clint.”

“I have somewhere to be.” He tried to be polite, not feeling like starting a fight right now. His hands were twitching, eager to go up to the roof and contact Stephen.

“Where?” Steve asked, frown digging into his forehead in confusion. He didn’t look upset at least. “It’s barely six thirty.”

“I’m meeting Pepper about some SI documents. Shouldn’t take too long.”

“Alright then.” Steve nodded and turned, and Tony’s shoulders relaxed as soon as the door had closed behind him.

Pepper knew to cover for him, and he refused to let Steve ruin his good mood so he sighed happily, smile on his face as he tapped his arc reactor, nanobots flowing out of his housing unit. 

“JARVIS, can you upload yourself into the suit?”

“Just finished, sir.” JARVIS’ voice sounded through his helmet and Tony felt genuine happiness course through him for the first time in months.

He was on the roof before long. Only once there, however, did he remember he had no way of contacting the sorcerer.

He had always shown up out of nowhere, swiping him away from the Avengers for a few pleasant hours before dropping him back off. All he’d have to do if he felt like seeing him was go up to the roof and he’d be there, but that had always been at night, never early in the morning, especially as he’d just dropped him off about an hour ago.

Tony huffed in frustration. There was no reason for him to want to see the sorcerer. No reason for them to have any line of communication. They had a system, and it worked.

——

Tony was ashamed to admit that when a few hours later, FRIDAY warned them of distress in Buenos Aires, he’d been excited.

Not for the people being hurt or the damage being done, but purely for the prospect of seeing Stephen. He managed to file the self-hatred away however, focussing instead on the opportunity to thank Stephen.

He’d spent all morning talking to JARVIS, absolutely blown away by the fact that he was able to work with him again. He was still the same, sarcasm dialled up to eleven and aware of what Tony needed before he’d even thought about it himself.

The main fight luckily took place in a desolate part of the city. The buildings old and rattled. It was one of those battles that Tony had no clue what the sorcerers were doing. What they could possibly want from the old buildings, what they had to gain from destroying the neighbourhood and causing a panic. 

He barely noticed the other sorcerers, throwing around spells and engaging his teammates.

Tony flew directly at his wizard instead, occupied with an empty suit, controlled by JARVIS, distracting him. Stephen saw him coming last minute, but he was too late to move his arms, Tony crashing into him and sending them both flying. He twisted in the air, so it looked like Stephen had taken control of the roll to throw Tony against the wall.

“JARVIS,” Tony mumbled, and a second later his screen went dark, all communications with the rest of his team falling quiet and making sure no one could hear him.

Original confusion was replaced by a devious smirk as he did what Tony had wanted; pin him further against the wall to trick his teammates. And of course, Stephen didn’t waste the opportunity to purposefully press their hips together.

It shouldn’t work as well as it did with Tony’s suit on, but he could still feel the tug in his belly, the need to take everything off and touch the sorcerer.

“Make us invisible.” He spoke, loud enough so Stephen could hear through his suit and the surrounding chaos. The sorcerer raised an amused eyebrow at him, clearly not expecting Tony’s attitude. They’d been fucking for weeks, fighting for longer, and yet Tony had never mixed those lives together. 

Stephen? Yes, constantly. He flirted so much and talked so filthily that Tony wasn’t even ashamed to admit he left some battles fully hard.

But Tony never acted on it. For all these weeks it had almost been like day Stephen and night Stephen had been two very different people.

Today Stephen was playful, flirty, teasing Tony without even being that sexual, but still Tony couldn’t bring himself to be angry at him. He’d been itching all morning to see him, and he just couldn’t wait until tonight anymore, not for this.

Stephen shrugged and snapped his fingers, the world around them cracking like glass, making Tony glance around in awe. “Did you just break the world?”

“We’re in the mirror dimension. No one can see our hear us, here.” Tony frowned slightly, the seemingly happy Stephen from earlier had diminished, face carefully neutral as he watched Tony, and he hadn’t even made a move yet despite apparently being alone.

It immediately made Tony’s insides twist shyly, earlier bravado fading slightly. He was still excited however, and let his faceplate melt away, revealing his smile to Stephen. He frowned slightly as he saw Stephen freeze, still holding him against the wall and eyes digging into Tony’s in something akin to confusion.

He snapped out of it a second later, breathing out as he raised a questioning eyebrow at Tony and stepped away, spreading his arm to motion around him.

“Well, Stark,” he smirked, “you’ve got me all to yourself. Didn’t really think exhibisionism was your kink, but I’m up for anything.”

Stephen turned his back to Tony in a swift movement, the twist of his ass distracting Tony temporarily before he managed to compose himself. The sorcerer was watching the fight around them evolve with a considering glance. Hulk was running around in the distance, smashing things that was going to cost Tony a lot of money later, and Steve was throwing around cars like he was taking off socks after a long day.

“Hey,” he started, Stephen’s shoulder freezing up slightly once more, before turning back to face him.

“Yes, Stark?” Stephen rolled his eyes at him now, “If you don’t want me to stick your dick in my mouth, why are we here?”

“To thank you.”

Stephen raised his eyebrow at him, clearly unimpressed by that answer. “You could have thanked me this morning. I don’t see how anything I’ve done since then warrants such gratitude. Well, not unless you’re planning on joining the dark side; I’ve been very productive today.”

Tony let the comment slide, as he proceeded.

“I installed JARVIS this morning,” Tony explained, watching the sorcerer’s eyes carefully as realisation fluttered through them. He took a step closer, lips tilting into a grateful smile. “It worked. He’s back. _Thank you.”_

Stephen was frozen in place as he stalked towards him, eyes unmoving from Tony’s. Tony noticed the tightness around his eyes, the confused tilt around his lips which had returned. He’d always admired Stephen’s eyes; how they sparkled like sapphires in the night and shone brightly like the ocean in sunlight.

A smile was still tugging at his lips as he stopped in front of the sorcerer, suddenly reminded of the first time he’d kissed him. He’d been so angry then, but now all he could feel was appreciation and happiness. He leaned up, stretching out his neck to carefully press his lips against Stephen’s.

When he was barely a breath away from the sorcerer’s lips, however, the sorcerer swallowed before taking a step back and clearing his throat.

Tony frowned at him in confusion, heart jumping painfully at the retreat. It was the first time Stephen had rejected him. He had clearly been a fool to assume he never would.

“I’ll see you tonight, Stark.”

Before Tony could say anything else, the sorcerer moved his hands, the air around them untwisting until they were standing in the middle of the battleground again. Tony covered his face with his suit, not wanting anyone to be able to read him.

A second later Stephen was gone, and it wasn’t long before the other sorcerers disappeared as well.

All Tony could do was stare at the place he’d disappeared in confusion, ignoring the questions his teammates were throwing each other.

Tony couldn’t figure it out. He was supposed to be a genius, yet the sorcerer had him stuck.

Ever since their first meeting, Stephen had been so adamant of his attraction to Tony. Never shy about his thoughts and feelings.

Tony always managed to pique his interest, no matter what time of day.

They had a good thing going, in Tony’s opinion, so why had he pulled away?

It didn’t seem like he wanted to stop their … whatever it was their arrangement could be called as he’d assured him that they’d see each other later.

All Tony had wanted to do was show his gratitude, had wanted to kiss Stephen since hearing JARVIS’ voice that morning.

It was a harsh reminder that maybe he’d gotten too comfortable around the sorcerer.

Perhaps he’d stopped hating him over the course of their affair. When had he started feeling excitement to see the sorcerer instead of the pure sexual lust and anger?

They had gotten too used to their nights together. It had become second nature, so much so that the lines between them had blurred.

But evidently only on Tony’s side.


	9. escape

“That was an absolute dick move,” Tony ground out as Stephen’s lips trailed down his cheek towards his neck, his scarred hands mapping his naked back. He loved it when Stephen sat in his lap, having him wrapped around his torso and the sorcerer’s full attention on him. 

Tony revelled in those moments. 

When Stephen had rejected him before the insecurity had gotten under his skin, almost scared to see the sorcerer again later that day. He wouldn’t have been the first person to start getting sick of him over time, to want the dream but not reality, what he appeared to be but not who he was. 

Yet Stephen had been just as enthusiastic as usual, and Tony had wanted everything to go back to normal so he’d rolled with it. It had been his mistake to forget their place, the unspoken rules set up at the beginning of their arrangement. 

And Tony had started pretending to continue being angry with the man. It seemed to be when Stephen was most comfortable; rougher, touchier and more demanding. Tony loved it. Loved to give everything to him but keep him on the edge. 

“You enjoyed it,” Stephen scoffed near his ear, trailing his teeth over his earlobe and carding his hands through Tony’s hair, successfully making him forget everything about their earlier battle. 

Perhaps he had; to some degree. 

It was true that the sorcerer attacks had gotten pettier. Less organised and with less collateral damage. Perhaps it was part of the reason that Tony had allowed their nights to continue. Wasn’t sure what he’d do if anyone were to die due to Stephen. 

Again. 

Tony pushed his thoughts aside as Stephen started pushing him down until his back hit the mattress, the sorcerer making eager work of his shirt, pulling it over his head and attacking his scarred chest. 

He was just starting to pull at Tony’s pants when a sound echoed through the hallway and into their bedroom, making Tony frown as Stephen stiffened on top of him. 

He scoffed at the door, sitting up in Tony’s lap as a considering gaze flicked between him and the exit. Tony stared back at the sorcerer, annoyed at the distance between him and Stephen. 

“You have to wait here or leave.”

“What? Why?” Tony asked in confusion, turning his head towards the door in suspicion, itching to get up and grab his housing unit off the floor, feeling horribly exposed all of a sudden. Stephen was already climbing off of him, gathering his clothes and quickly getting dressed. 

“Wait here then, it most likely won’t take long.” Stephen rolled his eyes, heading towards the door before hesitating and turning back towards Tony. Tony watched him, absolutely baffled by the sudden change in situation. Only a second ago Stephen had been focussed solely on him, now he was a million miles away. 

Sputtering, he managed to ask, anger starting to raise its head, “You really need to attack something else? Didn’t you already do enough damage today.”

Stephen glared at him, eyes flashing and already twisting the nob on the door, “Careful, Stark.”

“No!” Tony sat up straighter, unbothered by the warning tone in Stephen’s voice, “Whatever is going on-“

“- is not in this dimension,” Stephen interrupted him, “there’s nothing you can do anyway. I have to go now so make up your mind about leaving, will you.”

Tony wanted to argue, wanted to tell Stephen to send him back, but apparently he took too long, because Stephen opened the door and disappeared, leaving Tony on his own.

He glared at the door, as if Stephen would be able to see him through the wood, flopping back against the mattress and letting out a frustrated sigh. What the _hell_?

He had just left. 

Tony felt like a brat for being angry at him for it. For demanding Stephen’s full attention when something important was clearly going on. He thought he understood Stephen enough to know he wouldn’t willingly walk away from their … session. 

Yet some part of him knew he should be _more_ outraged, should stop him from doing whatever he was doing. He was his opponent, and the fact that he was predisposed in Stephen’s bedroom now could have been exactly what the sorcerer had planned all along. It could be the big finale, the moment where it all turned out to be a trick, the big betrayal, the play reaching its end to thunderous applause.

But Stephen had said it was in a different dimension - a mind-blowing thought for later - and he had never lied to Tony before. He wanted to belief he was telling the truth, if only for the fact that he wouldn’t know what to do if it wasn’t. 

Not able to lie still with his thoughts for long, Tony got up from the bed and glared around the room. 

With the amount of time he’d spent there by now, he should be more familiar with it, but he’d never really spared their surroundings a second thought. 

It was rather simplistic, with a comfortable chair near the window and a desk against the far wall being the only furniture besides the fourposter bed. 

It really did look like Hogwarts. 

It didn’t take long for Tony to get bored with the lack of interesting objects, nothing to tinker with or no books to read. At least not in languages he understood. 

He pulled his shirt back over his head and hesitated by the door for barely a second before he opened it, letting his curiosity lead him further into the building. 

He stepped into a hallway, almost surprised to find it looking so… bland? It was just a normal old hallway, one wall lined with doors while the other showed windows at regular intervals, looking out on… Manhattan? Tony couldn’t place it but it looked like New York City. 

He had honestly expected to be anywhere else, surprised that all this time they had been this close to the tower. He’d been thinking of Stephen’s bedroom as a kind of hide-out, escaping as far away from the tower as possible. Maybe somewhere in Europe or Asia. 

Stephen’s windows had looked out on a random set of roofs, so he’d known they were in a city, he’d just expected something like Brussels, Prague or Beijing. 

Luckily, the hallway was empty, not sure what would happen if he bumped into another sorcerer. He would probably get killed on the spot. They had never left Stephen’s bedroom, had no reason to, really, and Tony had no reason to belief they would be as courteous as Stephen had been. Tony didn’t have the leverage of sex over them either. 

Sneaking his way forward, he reached the end of the hallway, leading out into a landing overlooking the income hall. A huge window illuminated the stairs leading down, and Tony stared at it for a while. The window was honestly gorgeous, the city lights spreading an almost mystical glow into the foyer. 

His gaze slid down over the wall until it caught on a set of swords hanging a little further away. Tony stepped forward, letting his intrigue lead him as he reached out his hand, trying to feel the smooth, surely centuries old, metal. 

In a flash of deep red, the cloak stopped him. 

It came out of nowhere, wrapping itself around his arm and pulling him back, before settling on his shoulders. Tony looked at it in surprise, glancing around the space to look for its owner but ending up disappointed. “Shouldn’t you be with Stephen?”

The fabric squeezed tighter around his shoulder, and Tony sighed. “Left behind as well, hu?”

He glanced further around the foyer, stiffling a yawn behind his hand. He was in dire need of caffeine if Stephen really expected him to wait here for him. “Okay, fabric - ouch! - fine, _cloak,_where is the kitchen?”

The cloak starting pulling at his shoulders, Tony obediently following its direction down the stairs, reaching the downstairs area as it started leading Tony into another hallway. 

As they rounded a corner however, Tony almost bumped into another body. 

His heart started racing as he stared at the sorcerer in shock, uncertain of what to do now. He’d only ever seen Wong in battle. Not as often as Stephen or Mordo, but when he was out on the field he wasn’t one to be messed with. 

Tony was mostly caught up with Stephen and barely interacted with the other wizards as a result, but the tic-tac, especially, seemed to be afraid of him, for some reason. 

He wasn’t looking forward to finding out the hard way as to why. 

Once again he became very aware of his absent housing unit, cursing himself for not picking it up from the floor before leaving the room. 

“Euhm, hi?” He met Wong’s blank stare with a nervous smile, feeling the cloak wrap around his torso more tightly as he kept his gaze locked on the sorcerer’s. 

Wong rolled his eyes as they flicked towards it, the neutral expression remaining as he looked past Tony and continued on his way with a single line of dialogue. “Kitchen is that way. Stephen should be back soon. Don’t touch anything.”

“Thanks,” Tony managed to drawl out, not sure that was the correct response, as he watched the sorcerer walk away in bewilderment. _Alright then._

He was still frowning when he stepped into the kitchen, the cloak relaxing around his shoulders. 

It was weird being - wherever they were. The building seemed almost cosy, with warm colours and reading nooks spread around. Looking around the kitchen now, it almost looked like a completely normal house. 

He kept the space dark, not bothering trying to look for a light switch, as he let the light spilling in from the hallway illuminate his search for the coffee machine. He found one shoved away behind some plants on the counter and searched the cabinets for coffee beans. When he finally found some he made himself a pot, letting his gaze explore the space while he waited for the machine to finish. 

The kitchen table was quite big and round, surely meant to seat twelve people at least, but there were only about six chairs spread around it, no two matching. It was dark out, but the big window to the left would let in a lot of light during the day, illuminating a bunch of plants spread out on the windowsill. 

He hummed to himself in confusion as he turned back to the cabinets to search for a mug, sighing as soon as the taste of warm coffee relaxed him. 

“Ah, I didn’t know Stephen had a guest.” A voice sounded from the doorway. 

Tony frowned as he turned around, the woman was about … honestly ageless. Completely bald and wearing dark green robes, eyes wide and almost eerie. 

Tony felt like he needed to be scared, knew that whoever this person was was powerful. He could feel it in the air, see it the way she held herself and how even the cloak stilled around his shoulders. 

Yet at the same time her presence was calming. Almost like a Boa constrictor at the zoo. Knew she had the power to kill him but saw no use in bothering. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to intrude. Wong mentioned I could wait in here.”

“Of course, you can,” The woman confirmed, setting Tony at ease a little more still. He didn’t want to let his guard down, wouldn’t allow his eyes to leave the threat in the room, but she only looked amused. “Stephen will be back any minute. I’m only visiting, myself.”

Her voice was soothing. Tony thought if she were to record audio books or maybe a podcast, he’d finally get a regular sleep schedule. 

Her eyes were focused, but glanced around the room idly, clearly unbothered by Tony’s presence as she continued slowly towards the windowsill. 

“Precious plants,” she commented, petting one of the branches, “Stephen overwaters them, of course,” turning her head towards Tony, she rolled her eyes slightly as if they were sharing an inside joke. Tony frowned at the sentiment, not imagining Stephen caring about something as tedious as plants at all. 

“You’re right,” she sighed even as Tony hadn’t spoken, “he gets incredibly bored. It’s a shame really; brilliant mind but focus a mile away.”

“Do you know him well?” He asked, words slipping out before he could stop himself. 

“That’s hard to say,” she started, “there are a lot of sides to a person. I’ve seen almost all of his, but which one matters the most is subjective, of course.”

“And if you’re someone who likes to describe people to their actions, well,…” she hummed considering, glancing back up at Tony, “well, let’s say I’ve seen him make a million different choices in a million different lifetimes.”

“You could have just said yes,” Tony grumbled into his mug, annoyed at the cryptic answer. He’d thought Stephen was bad, but he wasn’t even close. 

The woman sent him an amused look, visible even in the dark. 

“Ancient One?” Tony straightened as he glanced towards Stephen standing in the doorway. His gaze was fixed on the woman, luckily. He was barely five years older than Stephen, after all, and aging pretty decently if he said so himself. 

She didn’t take offense, smile broadening as she turned towards Stephen. “You’re back. Wonderful. I take it everything went smoothly.”

“It did,” Stephen replied politely, and Tony hid a smile behind his mug. It was amusing to see how Stephen turned into a weary schoolboy in front of the - Ancient One? Yeah no he was not going to call her that. 

“Splendid.” She replied, heading towards the hallway. “I’ll speak with Mordo and then I’ll be on my way.” 

She left, leaving Stephen to watch her walk away before turning back towards Tony, face carefully neutral as his eyes locked on Tony’s.

Tony’s stomach bottomed out, remembering why he was down here in the first place. He didn’t know where Stephen had gone off to, or what he’d meant when he said it “wasn’t in this dimension”. 

But he knew that he wanted answers.

“You going to tell me what that was about?” Tony asked, squinting at the sorcerer as he lowered his mug. 

“That was the Ancient One,” Stephen explained vaguely, moving to stand behind the counter along with Tony. His gaze was still watching him carefully, eyes closed off as he they were locked with Tony’s. The cloak floated off his shoulders, hesitate in front of the door before leaving the room completely. Stephen didn’t acknowledge it. 

“Not what I meant.” Though he did have a lot of questions about that as well. He let his face harden, as he glanced away from Stephen’s eyes. “You better tell me where you went off to, because if not you can just send me back now.”

He meant it, even as he couldn’t be more aware of the space between them, how the sorcerer was close enough to touch but keeping his hands to himself. He wanted to look into his eyes, show how serious he was, but he’d probably cave as soon as he did. He focused on his eyebrows instead, not quite as effective but it held the sentiment. 

“Careful,” Stephen warned again, not bothered by Tony’s show in the least as he sent him a stern look. Tony didn’t miss the sorcerer’s Adam’s apple bob slightly. “I’ll do it and where will you be then? 

Tony raised an unimpressed eyebrow, hoping Stephen couldn’t notice how his expression immediately went to his groin.

When Stephen didn’t answer, Tony faked a nonchalant shrug, placing his cup on the counter and turning towards the hallway. He avoided looking at Stephen, not knowing if he’d still be able to walk away otherwise. “Alright I know where the door was -“

Before he’d even set two steps, Stephen growled from behind him, hands gripping Tony’s hips to pull him back. Stephen twisted him in one quick movement, lifting him onto the counter and forcing his legs open. His lips were on his neck barely a second later, biting forcefully into his pulsepoint and Tony had to bite his lip to suppress a moan. 

He bucked forward involuntarily, pressing his growing length against Stephen’s stomach. His hands moved to card in his hair on instinct, forcing his head to stay where it was. 

Tony wanted to object, wanted to abscond from sex until Stephen explained where he’d gone off to, but Stephen was doing a wonderful job distracting him. 

Perhaps he could go celibate later. 

Stephen was never this dominant with him, Tony having told himself that as long as he was in control their nights were okay. It wouldn’t be him giving in to the evil sorcerer. 

But by God, Tony had missed this. Had missed surrendering. 

He always fought back, however dire the situation, and wouldn’t let evil win. 

Having Stephen ravish him now was nothing but a relief, a step back from his daily stress. Tony couldn’t stop him if he’d wanted to, wouldn’t be able to have his limbs cooperate when all they wanted to do was pull Stephen closer. 

He pulled Stephen’s mouth towards his - his only request for now - moaning against his lips as he let Stephen take the lead. Sighing with pleasure, he let his nails trail over Stephen’s neck, smiling at the warmth coursing through him.

A second later Tony felt like he was falling, stomach bottoming out as he gasped. He hit soft mattress, the burgundy sheets so familiar by now. Stephen quickly joined him on the bed, Tony running his hands up his sides as the sorcerer crawled up to his face. 

“You didn’t open a portal.” Tony asked, frowning up at Stephen even as he didn’t really care. All he cared about was Stephen’s eyes, blue irises impossibly thin with his pupils blown wide. 

“Don’t have to in the sanctum,” Stephen ground out as a response. He dipped his hands under his shirt and teased his nipples, leaning down to swallow Tony’s gasp. 

“Fuck,” Tony moaned against him, arching his back up to Stephen, needed more skin against his, needed the sorcerer closer to him as he moved his legs up to wrap around Stephen’s waist. 

“I plan to.” 

Under any other circumstance the response would have annoyed him to high heaven, but the promise drove him crazy in all the right ways now. Swallowing down a moan at Stephen’s insufferable grin as he let Stephen have his way with him. 

————

His eyes were still closed, but he could hear Stephen’s breathing. Too soft and irregular to not be conscious. 

He should panic about having fallen asleep. About having let his guard down around an enemy. But he was too tired. Exhaustion was already pulling him back into darkness, limbs feeling heavy as his breathing evened out once more, disappearing into unconsciousness.

He could still feel Stephen shifting next to him, could feel him rolling closer, his body heat warming his space. A trembling finger moved over his forehead, brushing aside his hair before trailing down along his cheek and brow. A second later the warm hand cupped his cheek, stroking his cheekbone before resting in his neck. 

The last thing Tony remembered before falling back asleep being the soft shivers the touch sent down his spine, and the longing jump of his heart. 


	10. waterloo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again for all the love received! I'm horrible at answering to them but I do appreciate them a lot. Really keeps the creativity flowing. 
> 
> That being said; I hope you enjoy this chapter! x

_His eyes were still closed, but he could hear Stephen’s breathing. Too soft and irregular to not be conscious. He should panic about having fallen asleep. About having let his guard down around an enemy. But he was too tired. Exhaustion was already pulling him back into darkness, limbs feeling heavy as his breathing evened out once more, disappearing into unconsciousness._

_He could still feel Stephen shifting next to him, could feel him rolling closer, his body heat warming his space. A trembling finger moved over his forehead, brushing aside his hair before trailing down along his cheek and brow. A second later a warm hand cupped his cheek, stroking his cheekbone before resting in his neck. _

_The last thing Tony remembered before falling back asleep being the soft shivers the touch sent down his spine, and the longing jump of his heart. _

——-

When he woke up again in the morning, he was lying in his own bed, blankets wrapped tightly around him and sun shining in through the big windows. Sitting up, he glanced around in confusion, but his bedroom was empty as usual, his hologram still set up at his desk where he’d face called Harley the evening before. 

“JARVIS? What time is it?”

“It’s around nine fifteen, sir.”

Tony’s eyes widened in surprise. He must have been exhausted after seeing Stephen, though he couldn’t remember coming back to the tower. He still remembered falling against Stephen, tired and sated after having been absolutely wrecked in all the best ways. 

He couldn’t remember the last time he’d bottomed. Don’t get him wrong, he loved it, it had just been a really long time since he’d been in a relationship - no, had sex with a man. 

He moved to get up, and _Oooh jup_, he felt that. 

A smile slid over his lips however, the discomfort reminding him of Stephen the night before, the lips that trailed over his neck, whispered words uncharacteristically soft, sweet nothings and promises of adorations bordering on sincere. Thinking about it now warmed his heart, but he tried to repress it, needing to get up and ready to head downstairs. 

And if anyone noticed they didn’t say anything about it. Even if they had, he wouldn’t have engaged, wanted to hold on the the bliss of the morning for as long as possible. 

He made it until five pm before everything went to shit. 

He had been playing pool with Rhodey when FRIDAY had warned them about an attack at the UN headquarters.

Disappointment had been his first reaction, bathing his body in cold water as he moved to get ready along with the other Avengers. 

It was quickly replaced by fear as soon as they reached the scene. 

Within five minutes it was clear that the sorcerers weren’t messing around this time. They had a mission, and clearly part of that plan was to get as many Avengers incapacitated as possible.  
Tony watched as Natasha was tossed back, her skull making a sickening cracking noise as it hit a wall, body lulling quiet a second later. 

Clint made his way over towards her, shooting a last arrow before giving in to temptation and moving to check on her. It was the wrong move. 

Mordo appeared out of nowhere, firing a spell Clint was unable to block and he yelled out in pain, falling in a stuttering mess next to Natasha’s - hopefully just - unconscious body. 

Tony stayed quiet while he fought, engaging with some unknown sorcerers as he tried to look around for Stephen. He was nowhere to be found, and though it should be a relief, it scared him. Without his eyes on him, he couldn’t know what he was doing. 

He was faring best against their opponents, with his suit protecting him he was at an advantage against physical weapons, and his repulsors were able to block the occasional spell aimed his way. 

Magic was energy, Stephen had explained one night, as were his blasts.

It barely gave Tony an edge, however, and he knew he wouldn’t be able to hold out much longer. As more and more Avengers fell, more and more sorcerers turned towards him. 

He was sweating inside his suit, limbs moving on instinct as he blocked as many spells he could, gritting his teeth whenever a blast hit home, and trying not to think of how his remaining teammates were struggling around him. 

Breathing heavily, he grunted as he was tossed back a few feet, back forced against a wall. At least no one could attack him from behind, but it was barely a consolation as the five sorcerers in front of him drew closer, surrounding him. Flying up would leave him vulnerable to attacks and JARVIS was working overtime searching for a solution. 

He vaguely noticed a portal opening a little while away, eyes remaining on the immediate threat in front of him. 

“Leave him to me. Go help Wong.” 

The sorcerer’s moved back, creating a portal as they disappeared, leaving only Stephen standing in front of him. 

Tony’s heart didn’t know if it should speed up in relief or terror, unable to read anything off the sorcerer’s face. But Tony was tired, had seen one teammate too many tossed around, and was too pissed about his good day having been ruined. He wasn’t going to give Strange the satisfaction of winning today. 

Firing up his weapons systems. Stephen sidestepped his attacks, dancing back as the cloak drifted him around, swift movements easily blocking Tony’s angry ones.  
  
The dynamic had shifted. Tony had noticed it as soon as Stephen had spoken. He wasn’t playful, wasn’t flirting, wasn’t messing around. He was deadly serious, and that detachment hurt more than any trick would have. 

Tony tried to hit and hit and hurt, but Stephen didn’t give him the opportunity, spells floating around him and barely missing Tony’s form. 

He didn’t know how long they were fighting each other, but a sorcerer called from behind him, alerting Stephen. Tony couldn’t hear what they said, too focussed on not getting hit by yet another spell. 

But when he turned around to face Stephen once more, the sorcerer was gone, and he was left alone in the destroyed meeting hall, bodies of his teammates scattered around him. 

——— 

He was numb. 

He had spent hours in the infirmary as the Avengers luckily opened their eyes one by one. Bruce had been able to help with most of their injuries, the Hulk not having been allowed out with them to the enclosed space of the UN building. 

Yet Natasha would have to stay in bed for the next couple of days, and Steve had been conscious for a while but had drifted back to subconscious as he was still being artificially respirated. They were the worst of the injuries, but others were still shaken from some of the spells they’d been hit with. 

Tony watched them all from the sidelines with not a scratch on him. Needed to know they were okay but feeling like an outsider, having been the last man standing as usual yet not having been able to hurt the sorcerers nearly as much as they’d hurt them. 

He tried to keep the guilt at bay, to not have it burn him up from the inside. But as more and more Avengers regained consciousness, Tony couldn’t stick around anymore. 

He didn’t know how he made it to the roof, only that he was standing outside now, thin sweater just enough to keep out the chill. 

It was later than he usually would have been, and any other day he would have wished for Stephen to be there. To be waiting on him still. 

He stepped towards the edge now, glaring out over New York city. In the distance he could hear sirens, and though logically he knew they weren’t for the attack from earlier anymore, it still seared through his mind, winding him up with every sound.

“Isn’t this the part where you fuck your frustration out on me?”

“Oh actually, I think I’d rather fight you right now,” Tony replied, voice steel as he turned around to face Stephen. He was standing a few feet away from him, as usual without Cloak, and though his face was as detached as it had been earlier, there was something softer underneath. Something careful, almost apologetic.  
  
Tony was projecting. There was no other way; had to be hoping for something there, something that would give Tony any reason to forgive him. Needed Stephen to beg for it so he could give in already. Something that would make it okay that he wanted the sorcerer’s arms wrapped around him. 

Stephen raised an unimpressed eyebrow at Tony’s anger, before shrugging. Tony’s eyes widened when Stephen summoned a blade, throwing it with deadly aim at Tony’s chest.

He just had enough time to roll away, skin scraping over concrete and immediately letting the nano suit cover his body. 

“What the hell?” He yelled at Strange, exasperation making his head fuzzy. It was almost a relief, however, having the anger for the sorcerer returned. Pushing away whatever emotions had been clouding his judgement, head clear for the first time since starting their affair. “What the actual fuck is wrong with you?!”

Stephen shrugged again, and Tony could spit fire. “It’s not my fault you forgot who I am. I am still your enemy, as you are mine.”

Hurt cut through his heart, mixing with his outrage to form a deadly explosive. 

Gritting his teeth, he fired up his repulsors, aiming at Stephen without thinking. He actually had the decency to look surprised, eyes widening slightly as he blocked the blast last minute, still thrown backwards with the force of impact. 

Stephen rolled over the ground, as graceful as ever, ending back up on his feet and twisting his hands in a spell in retaliation. Tony dodged, scorn fuelling his actions, and was about to ask JARVIS to fire up the missiles, before he stopped in his tracks. 

Fuck this. Fuck Stephen and his magic. 

He let the suit flow into its housing unit, Stephen watching him with a curious expression, face hard. He moved his hand to his chest, ripping the unit off in a fluid movement and tossing it aside. 

They had been fighting for months. And mind you Tony was still planning on fighting him now, anger not close to dissipating. But if Stephen truly saw him as an enemy … _let him hurt him_. 

Stephen was still watching Tony suspiciously, stance defensive as he noticed the fire in Tony’s eyes. Tony leapt forward, throwing a punch which Stephen blocked, immediately moving his leg to kick Stephen in the hip.

Stephen growled, retaliating by breaking through Tony’s blind spots. He got a few good hits in, the pain of the blows reverberating through his body and clearing his mind. 

They’d fought often enough for Tony to know all the tricks he had up his sleeves, but he didn’t pull out any weapons out of nowhere, didn’t use the ring to sneak just out of his reach and attack him from behind. 

He stayed in front of him, matching him in movements but nothing more. It infuriated Tony; needed Stephen to just get it all over with and win for good; he’d had enough, was so sick of losing and feeling absolutely powerless when it came to Stephen. 

Stephen eventually got in a good kick Tony should have been able to block, sending him back a few steps. He growled in anger and surged forward, grabbing Strange by the shoulders with a twist and slamming him into the ground with a move Natasha would have been proud of.

Stephen groaned in pain, and Tony fell down on top of him, making sure to keep him in place as he straddled his hips. 

“What are you doing?” Tony demanded, ignoring the clench of his heart as he watched Stephen underneath him. 

The same image he’d seen so many times now. 

Stephen sprawled underneath him, face flushed and smiling in pleasure, infuriatingly pretty as he teased Tony. He’d never known anyone who could speak so prettily while being fucked, who’d managed to seem in control while surrendering to another person. 

This was nothing like that. 

Stephen sighed, rolling his head back to look up at the sky instead of Tony, looking utterly defeated. Tony had seen him in battle, but his face had never been this hard, this angry towards _him_. He swallowed at the sight, trying to fit the pieces together and avoid the pull in his chest. 

“Now what, Stark?” He muttered, still avoiding Tony’s gaze. The teasing was back, which was anything but a relief as it felt diluted and forced. “You beat me.”

“I didn’t,” Tony frowned, anger fading as it was replaced by confusion. He had magic, he could push him off easily, their position anything but a checkmate. 

“You ended up on top,” Stephen supplied, jaw tightening as his eyes finally met Tony in a challenging glare. It wasn’t convincing, and Tony’s heart was beating anxiously, speeding up with the second. He didn’t understand what was happening. 

Why didn’t he fight back? 

Stephen’s eyes softened as he noticed, but he avoided his gaze as he laid his head back again, swallowing before speaking, voice laced with exhaustion. “I won’t hurt you, Tony.” 

“Why not?”

Stephen still didn’t look at him, ignoring the question and staring off into the distance. He still looked angry, jaw tight and glare aimed at the stars, so why would he not just fucking answer?

“Why not?!” Tony leaned forward to yell at him, letting go of his arms so he could force Stephen to look at him.

“I can’t!” Stephen spit out, glare shifting towards Tony in defiance. 

What? That didn’t make any sense! It didn’t -

Oh. 

_Oh. _

Tony’s heart jumped pleasantly, stomach soaring as if he was on a roller coaster. 

Searching Stephen’s pale blue eyes, it was all so clear now. The anger at the world, mirroring Tony’s own feelings, the urge to be closer, the pain at seeing him so close yet so far. 

He took a deep breath before leaning down, pressing his lips against Stephen’s and kissing him senseless. 

They had kissed thousands of time before, but this one was more meaningful somehow, the knowledge of Stephen’s confession along with his own gnawing feelings heightening the experience. 

Stephen’s lips moved hesitantly against him even as Tony pressed harder, hoping that if he just kissed him deeply enough, the butterflies in his stomach would settle down. Stephen’s freed arms moved up to tentatively card through Tony’s hair, holding him in place and their lips locked. 

He shuffled further back until he was positioned on Stephen’s lap, not once breaking the kiss, and pulled Stephen up with him. Stephen’s arms dropping to circle his waste, hands roaming over his back. 

The fluttering in his stomach was only getting worse, but Tony didn’t care, wrapping his own arms around the sorcerer’s neck and pulling him closer still. He nipped at Stephen’s bottom lip one last time before pulling back, needing air to fill his lungs as he pressed his forehead against Stephen’s. Stephen’s eyes were closed as he tried to regain his own breathing, and Tony’s heart stuttered at the sight. 

“Stephen -“

“No, Tony,” he interrupted him, eyes finally opening and watching Tony with a calm determination. “We can’t.” 

Tony frowned, chest tightening with fear. “I- what?”

“Tony,” Stephen started, halting slightly as his lips twisted into a sad smile, “_my love,_ I don’t deserve you. I have already destroyed too many things dear to me.”

“Stephen, don’t,” Tony whispered, bordering on desperation as he gripped onto his robes. 

“We’re on different sides.”

“Why do we have to be?” He moved his hands back to cup Stephen’s face, holding him close. “Fuck the Avengers. It’s not a hard choice.”

Even saying it guilt started gnawing at his stomach. They just wanted to make the world a safer space, as did Tony, and they were downstairs hurt while he was up here in the arms of their enemy. Though he did mean it; he wanted Stephen, more than anything. 

Stephen remained quiet, avoiding Tony’s gaze, and it was driving Tony up the wall. His silence said it all, however; it wasn’t that simple. 

He hadn’t forgotten the attack from earlier, the people that had gotten hurt and died because of Stephen and the sorcerers. Tony knew he couldn’t stand behind that without loosing himself. He wanted to help, couldn’t bear seeing people hurting and not be able to do anything about it. 

Tony moved off of Stephen’s lap, shuffling back until he was sitting against the railing. He rested his elbows on his knees, needed to put some space between him and Stephen so he could think. 

Why the fuck did he have to fall in love with a villain? 

Because that’s what it was, and he couldn’t deny it any longer. 

He thought about his broken teammates downstairs, and felt horrible for not caring more. For preferring to sit on the roof with the person that had been responsible for their wounds. 

Stephen had hurt and killed innocent people, damaged the city and wreaked havoc on a daily basis, but Tony still loved him. Loved the way he was so certain, so sure of himself, and seemed to have everything figured out. He loved his hands, soft but harsh at the same time, and the way sunlight reflected in his eyes. He really enjoyed the way he teased him, kept him on his toes and knew how to set him off in all the best ways. 

He really really loved the way Stephen cared for him. That he recognised all the work Tony was putting in and settled his doubts. 

And though Stephen was right in saying that he could never stand by Stephen as he continued on this path, he couldn’t help hope that maybe he could stop him from hurting people. 

Why couldn’t he just figure it out?

Tony sighed, glancing back up at Stephen, whose gaze was pointed towards the horizon, face blank and eyes distant with concealed emotion. He held out his hand, relieved as Stephen’s look shifted towards it before placing his own in Tony’s. Linking their fingers together, they continued sitting in silence, until eventually over the horizon the sun started to rise. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> originally posted on Tumblr @funkylittlebidiot


	11. shadows

Tony hesitated only momentarily before taking the final steps to the front door and knocking. Except his fingers never touched the wood.

Tony stumbled as he felt like he blacked out for a second, swallowing down the nausea and trying to blink away the dark spots in his eyes. This definitely was a lot less pleasant without Stephen’s arms around him.

“It’s the middle of the afternoon.”

He swivelled around, trying to find the source of the voice through his disorientation. His eyes settled on Wong, standing behind a table, books spread out in front of him.

“Good afternoon?” He frowned at him, not sure what he was getting at. Perhaps he should have accounted for the possibility of a sorcerer opening the door that wasn’t Stephen.

“Why are you here, Stark?” Wong sighed in exasperation, sinking back down in his chair as he glared at Tony.

Tony wasn’t sure how much the sorcerer knew about him and Stephen. Obviously he was aware of Tony’s visits every night, having barely bat an eye when he’d ran into him before.

And Wong must know enough not to be alarmed by an Avenger having found their secret hide-out. After all, he could still call on his teammates, take the sorcerers down once and for all. Tony wasn’t quite sure why he hadn’t already. He knew he loved Stephen, and not wanting to lose him was enough to keep quiet for now, but who knew, maybe in a few weeks or months something would change his mind.

Even now there was guilt gnawing at his stomach when he let himself think about the sorcerers for too long, aware of the damage they’d already done to people’s lives.

Yet, all it took was forcing himself to think about Stephen instead to ease that guilt. To file it away for later. Perhaps it was okay as long as he could keep Stephen from hurting anyone while they were together.

“I’m looking for Strange.”

Wong blinked at him, face passive and expressionless, but it said enough. _Obviously. _

“So… can you help me out?”

“Stephen should be back any second.”

Tony checked his watch instinctively for any missed alerts, but before he could worry about Stephen’s absence for too long, he noticed a familiar flash of red and blue in his peripheral vision.

He turned, taking in the part of the room that had previously been at his back. Stephen was floating in the air in front of one of three big windows looking out over the same rooftops as Stephen’s bedroom. A set of couches separated him form Stephen, and he walked around them as he stalked closer to his sorcerer. Confusion set in as he watched him; Stephen’s legs were crossed in front of him, his eyes closed. 

Wong clearly considered Stephen absent, and the slack features of Stephen’s face definitely supported that claim. He was merely here as a body, his mind a hundred miles away. The cloak was wrapped protectively around Stephen’s shoulders, and Tony smiled when it waved at him.

“Do NOT disturb him.” Wong spoke up from behind him, and he huffed before turning back towards his by now second favourite sorcerer.

“What’s he doing?”

“Do not disturb me either.”

Tony sighed, but he had time. He took a seat, making sure to have a good view of Stephen’s unconscious body and tapped at his watch so he could work in silence as he waited.

He hoped it wouldn’t take too long, however, as with every second he was starting to get more and more bored. And it only left time for his mind to run circles around itself, knots forming with every twist. In every way imaginable, this was completely new territory for him. He’d loved before, he’d lost before, but he knew with Stephen everything was heightened.

They’d barely spent time together that wasn’t sexual, barely held a decent conversation, yet the possibilities of what their relationship _could be_, if they let it, were driving Tony insane. If they found a way to make it work, if they managed to figure it out, Tony knew he wouldn’t want anything else.

Despite Stephen being a villain, he knew he was everything Tony wanted. Intelligent, snarky, humorous, absolutely gorgeous, matched Tony in every way possible whether conversational or sexual.

He wanted that. He wanted _him. _And he knew it was a dangerous game to let his feelings continue, to deepen it in the way they were doing, allowing it more meaning than it was supposed to be. He knew he was already in love with him, so he should cut ties. Break it off. Try to move on or better yet, finally lock his heart for good.

Continuing on this path would only lead to pain and misery in the end, but again, the hope that they would find a way was pushing him forward. The mere possibility of working it out, enough to keep him hooked and intrigued. To keep going on this self-destructive path. Tony had never quite learned to steer away from those, anyway.

Stephen had been so still the entire time he’d been here, that Tony immediately noticed when his eyes opened. His breathing became more shallow as he came to and glanced around, raising a questioning eyebrow at Tony’s presence. Stephen’s glance moved to Wong, still at the table behind him, and the sorcerer took that as his cue to leave.

Tony watched him carefully, unsure at how Stephen would react to him being here, but Stephen simply sighed and rolled his eyes with a smirk. He grinned at the sorcerer without even wanting to, getting up out of his chair to step closer to him. “I should have known you’d be stubborn enough to find the sanctum of your own accord.”

“What can I say,” Tony smiled sweetly, “anything is possible when properly motivated.”

“And what was the motivation, might I ask?” Stephen dropped his feet to the floor, elegant as ever, and the Cloak immediately let go of his shoulders as soon as it knew Stephen was fine and switched over to Tony’s. Stephen didn’t even react to the betrayal anymore.

“Isn’t it obvious?” Tony raised his eyebrow. “It’s not as if I have your phone number and I’ve been told I’m very impatient.”

“Well, I’m a busy man, darling, I can’t spend every second with you.” The teasing was almost instinctive, Tony could feel it, and he couldn’t hate it. He only rolled his eyes softly at Stephen, stepping just a little bit closer still as he looked him in the eyes.

“Can you spend an evening with me?”

Stephen squinted at him. “Did you hit your head? We’ve been fucking every night for months.”

Tony refused to let Stephen’s forced obtuse get under his skin, only shook his head softly as he clarified; “I meant as in a date, Stephen. Dinner at eight?”

“You came here just to ask me out on a … a _date?”_

“Jup,” Tony grinned, “like I said; no phone number, and as much as I love having sex with you, I’d like to see you in clothes for once. Preferably a hot suit.”

“So you’re just using this as an excuse to get me in a suit?” Stephen asked, eyebrow raised as he leaned against the bookcases to his left with an amused smile. “What’s in it for me? I see you in suits every day and honestly, I prefer tearing them off.”

“Well,” Tony started, smirking at Stephen, dropping his voice just a bit. “I don’t normally get kinky until after the first date. And not to toot my own horn,” Tony winked, satisfied when he noticed the interest in Stephen’s eyes, “but I’m _really_good at kinky.”

Stephen stayed quiet for a while, his gaze burning Tony’s skin. He already knew he was getting what he wanted, Stephen’s flush and diluted pupils said it all, so he just smiled back at him innocently, blinking slowly with a questioning smile.

As much as he would love for Stephen to drag him off to his bedroom right this second and have a little appetiser before dinner, he was a man of class. So, instead of tearing Stephen’s robes off, he kept his perfect composure, smiled at Stephen one last time before turning away and heading for the door.

He shrugged the cloak off, the fabric hanging in the air sadly as both it and Stephen watched Tony leave.

“Eight pm.” He yelled over his shoulder at Stephen and didn’t miss the sorcerer’s eyes glued to his ass. “You’ll find me.”

——

“Oh, I like this place,” Stephen commented as they stepped inside the establishment Tony had chosen, glancing around with a familiar ease. Tony had been here a few times himself, having chosen it today for its smooth atmosphere. 

There was a bar near the front, marble illuminated with soft blue lights, but Tony had reserved a small table near the back, the shadows perfect to get lost in, and a little more intimate which allowed for easier conversation. 

“Sorcerers spend a lot of time in lounges?” Tony asked, teasing tilt around his lips as he turned towards the hostess and asked for their table.

“No, but surgeons do.”

He kept forgetting Stephen used to be a doctor. He _knew_… the bastard insisted everyone call him that after all, but then again Captain America wasn’t really a captain either. Stephen placed a hand in the small of his back as the hostess lead them to their table, and Tony let himself lean into the touch.

“If it wasn’t for my glamour, Veronica would have definitely recognised me.”

“Veronica?” Tony frowned, before realising he was talking about the woman, and he turned towards Stephen with a glare. “Wait you also slept with her?”

Stephen’s face immediately darkened, moving his hand until it was gripping at Tony’s waist, pulling him against his body. Tony only grinned up at him, using his hip to bump Stephen’s slightly as he winked. “That’s what you get for trying to make me jealous, asshole.”

The sorcerer loosened his grip and rolled his eyes in annoyance, but Tony still noticed the small blush on his cheekbones. He grinned in satisfaction as he stepped away from him and pulled out one of the lounge chairs, motioning for Stephen to take it, “now sit and behave.”

Stephen stared at him with a raised eyebrow, before taking the opposite chair and sitting down with a bored expression bordering on challenging.

“You just like being difficult, don’t you?” Tony sighed and glared at Stephen, knowing it wasn’t convincing in the least. He sat down opposite him, watching Stephen’s features carefully. He couldn’t help it. Stephen’s face looked like it was sculpted from marvel, smooth and hard, striking eyes that couldn’t help but draw him in. Even his hair was perfect at all times, deadly still and handsome.

He couldn’t wait to run his hands through it and mess it all up.

“Tony?”

Tony hummed as he was pulled out of his thoughts, letting his gaze drop back to Stephen’s eyes. The sorcerer was watching him with a subdued expression, eyes narrowing slightly at him. His heart jumped nervously at the expression.

“Why are we here?”

Tony frowned, leaning back in his chair as he stared at Stephen in confusion. “As in this lounge? If you don’t like it we can -“

“No,” Stephen rolled his eyes softly. He could feel the sorcerer search his irises, and once again he wondered if Stephen could really read his mind. If he could he wouldn’t have to ask, pretty sure his thoughts and feelings were pretty obvious even without telepathy. “Why are we here.. on a _date?”_

Tony opened his mouth to answer, exasperation already itching at his skin as he rolled his eyes at the sorcerer. But Stephen interrupted him, leaning forward a little to watch Tony more intently. “I know what you said earlier, but I thought it was pretty clear yesterday that this wouldn’t work out.”

He didn’t miss the sadness in Stephen’s tone. “Why not?”

Stephen tilted his head and sent Tony a look. “You know why.”

He did.

“I don’t.”

Stephen sighed in frustration, his hand moving up to card through his hair, before smiling down sadly at Tony. Tony hated how much he loved that look, how he couldn’t help find it incredibly sexy and how it made his heart jump happily. “You want to save everyone. And I can only tell you it’s not possible.”

The words were enough to dampen his spirits, looking away from Stephen and fixing his gaze on his drink instead. “Explain to me why. What is it you’re trying to do? And why is it so important that you have to kill innocent people over it?”

“We don’t have to kill innocent people, it’s just easier that way,” Stephen’s voice was calm, almost bored, and it made Tony’s grip tighten around his glass. “In the long run, a few lives really don’t matter at all. And the people we kill intentionally, well, those aren’t quite so innocent. At least not in their role for the future.”

“You’re really not winning me over, doc.”

“It’s not about achieving things now. It’s not about instant gratification,” Stephen pressed on, making Tony glance up at him slightly. He was starting to look agitated, staring at Tony as if that alone could make him understand. “We’re just meant to aid things along. Stop the world from spiralling away from its chosen path.”

“What?”

“Everything happens for a reason, Tony. I used to think that you could control your own life but you really have no say in the matter. There’s a force bigger than all of us,” Stephen sounded almost bitter at that last part, moving up his hand to take a sip of his drink. His voice turned teasing as he glanced at Tony over the rim of his glass, smirking slightly as he added; “The Avengers are nothing in the face of the universe. It’s quite relaxing fighting you, really.”

Tony glared at him and Stephen raised an amused eyebrow at his defiance. “Don’t worry, Stark, you’re my favourite for a reason. I don’t enjoy easy pray.”

Why he was so easily distracted from the matter at hand, Tony didn’t know. Stephen must have noticed Tony’s face fall slightly, because his gaze softened as he tried to meet his eyes. He could feel his ears turning red at being caught but tried to play it off. “You called me Tony before.”

Stephen’s face brightened again into a devilish grin, leaning forward over their little table as he cupped Tony’s jaw in his fingers, tilting his head to meet Stephen’s. Tony swallowed looking into his eyes, basking in the intensity of his stare. The way his eyes were lidded and playful and horribly sincere.

Stephen leaned towards him, Tony immediately itching forward himself, his mouth opening up underneath the pressure of Stephen’s scarred fingers digging into his flesh as he welcomed Stephen’s tongue.

He let himself be lost in it, in Stephen, sitting together in the dark booth of the lounge like any other couple would. Like it was just them, two meaningless people in an infinite universe. Kiss soft but passionate, like they had all the time in the world and treasuring each second.

“I’ve called you many things before, _my love_.” Stephen purred, when he pulled back, thumb wiping a bit of spit from the corner of Tony’s lips. Tony didn’t miss the way the sorcerer’s smile tilted even more at the affectionate term, the flash of pure glee mixed with the possessiveness of the pronoun.

Tony felt like he could explode. Like he could die happy. Like everything would be okay as long as he was with Stephen. 

It wasn’t so bad, Tony had convinced himself. Staying apart now, after they had spent the nights together for months, seemed pointless. If they had to be on different sides during the day, they could still enjoy each other’s company in the shadows. At night there were no sides, just the two of them and the mess of feelings between them.

——

Tony glanced towards Stephen, the sorcerer staring at the ceiling as usual, though his expression was softer than Tony was used to. The fluttering of his heart reminded him that Stephen loved him, as he did him, and even as it went unsaid, that was all that really mattered at the moment.

Smiling to himself, he rolled over until he was lying on top of Stephen, leaning his chin on his chest so he could watch him. He looked bemused at the movement, eyes softening as they met Tony’s, and he tentatively wrapped his arms around Tony’s back, pressing him closer in the process. Tony smiled in approval, glad to see the sparkle in the sorcerer’s eyes, and pressed a kiss to his collar bone before placing his ear against the Stephen’s chest, listening to the soft rhythm of his heart as he enjoyed the feeling of his strong arms around him.

They had never touched after sex before, the lines between them clear from the beginning. Tony couldn’t help himself anymore, and as he knew the sorcerer felt the same way, he was finished with boundaries. Needed them to change and adapt to fit their new truths.

Stephen smelt amazing, musky and warm, and Tony revelled in it, the proximity, being able to touch softly, affection coursing through him even as his brain yelled about Stephen being a villain. He was aware, but he was safe in his arms nonetheless, and had made peace with loving him anyway.

Stephen’s hands moved up, starting to softly pet Tony’s hair and Tony knew he was done for.

He would never be able to give this up willingly.


	12. interruption

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again thank you for all the lovely comments! 💕 They honestly make writing this fic so much more fun!

Despite what the Avengers might think, not all of the sorcerers’ missions involved bells and whistles. More often than not, their missions were quiet, taking out a politician here or there, pushing people to make certain decisions or strategically placing a relic somewhere.

It was like chess, shifting the pieces until they had arranged the board in their favour.

Stephen was taking his time today, lazily stalking through the halls of the Smithsonian. He’d never really been a fan of history, preferring biology and the life sciences, but since becoming a sorcerer he had a newfound appreciation.

Becoming a sorcerer had been about both taking back control and surrendering it. Both strengthening himself and trusting The Ancient One to lead them. There was a force higher than all of them, but if the Universe was the drunk uncle, the sorcerers were the ones steering him in the direction of the couch and praying he didn’t throw up on them.

Yet along the way, he’d found reading about history and spells to be soothing. He was learning to learn for the first time in his life. Not to become a surgeon. Not to become the smartest person in the room.

Sure, his goal had been to become a sorcerer, needed to learn magic and grow his power, but it had been nice to get his mind off of his own misery, away from the hospital he was supposed to be at.

Even now, with everything going on, the museum was the first thing to get his mind away from Tony.

Tony, whom he had somehow tricked into wanting to be with him. 

The energy around him was definitely shifting as he neared the far end of the building, the relic surely not being far away.

The museum was quite calm at this hour, the only sound coming from the groups of students filtered throughout the displays. Stephen didn’t pay them any attention, easily following the threads of energy pulling him closer.

Tony had been spending the nights with him for the last couple of weeks. Ever since their ‘date’. Stephen still wasn’t sure how he’d ended up at this point, how he had ended up in Tony Stark’s inner circle. Even after all his teasing and flirting, he’d never expected anything more to come off it. Had expected that to be all he was ever going to get, but Tony’s shows of trust in him were silent but true. 

Like the first time Tony had surrendered control to him. The night he’d left to fix that little squabble in the fifteenth dimension. The night Tony had threatened to leave. The night he’d slept in his bed for the first time.

It had been a line Stephen had never thought they would cross. Had thought Tony would use him as a plaything but nothing more. 

At the time, he could still convince himself that was just what Tony had needed. That it didn’t mean anything more than that. That Tony had fallen asleep out of exhaustion, unable to think about the risk. That it didn’t mean that Tony trusted him. 

Yet, now, Tony fully understood the extent of Stephen’s feelings for him, and he stayed. Asked him on a date. Fell asleep in his arms and pressed sweet kisses to his collarbone. 

Stephen honestly didn’t know what he’d done to deserve any of it. 

The signal seemed to come from a closed exhibition about ancient Egypt, which seemed about right according to his research. He ignored the no access signs, stepped around them and pushed his way through the doors. They fell closed again behind him and he glanced around the hall he was in, taking in the ancient artefacts and murals. It was clear why it was closed off; some parts of the hall were still empty, others only halfway through being set up.

“I don’t think you’re supposed to be here.”

Stephen turned around at the voice, spell curling at his fingertips as he took in the person following him.

“Spiderman?” He frowned at the teen in front of him. To anyone else he should look like a random staff member, the glamour around him strong and steady. Yet Peter seemed to be looking through it, white eyes focussed on his features as if having to strain to see clearly.

Stephen figured it made sense; the spell should only work on people not looking for it, not having wanted to waste energy on anything stronger. If his spider senses made him alert of something off, it should be enough to work through it. Stephen dropped the spell and glamour all together, knowing the strain would turn into a headache soon if Peter didn’t let up. “Shouldn’t you be in Queens?”

“Fieldtr-,” Peter choked on his words, and Stephen felt a smile pull at his lips. “I mean… I knew what you were up to and came to thwart your plan!”

“Really?” Stephen lulled, leaning an arm on the statue to his left. He could see the spider’s huge white eyes narrow slightly at him touching the art. It reminded him of Wong, so he only smiled wider, putting more weight on the truly ugly bronze. “So you came all the way out here? On your own? That’s brave.”

“I’m sure Mr. Stark will be happy to see you taking such responsibility all on your own.” Stephen continued, keeping his voice low but teasing, “One blast to that suit of yours and I’m sure alarms will be blaring. It’s been a while since I’ve seen him,” he lied, “I wouldn’t mind pulling him out here, would you?”

“He won’t mind me stopping you!” Peter’s eyes narrowed in determination, though he seemed a little more subdued about the thought of alerting Tony. Stephen thought it was adorable. He agreed, of course; Tony’s heart was weak enough as it was, didn’t need the fright of thinking Peter was in danger.

“Tell you what,” he started, stepping away from the statue and closer towards Peter. The Spiderman stiffened at his movement, hands twitching at his side. “I’ll allow you to try and fight me without alerting Stark. You won’t win, but it might be good practice.”

“I don’t need practice!” Peter scoffed and crossed his arms in front of him, stance defensive as he glared at the sorcerer. Stephen quickly moved his hand, throwing a streak of smoke at him. The teen tried to dodge, but with his arms crossed over his chest he was too late to move, clearly not having expected an attack. It hit him straight in the chest, dissipating as soon as it touched him.

“Boom. You’re dead.”

Peter startled, hands dropping as he stared at his chest in panic. “I am?! Did you just poison me?”

“Relax, kid,” Stephen smirked. He was starting to see why Tony had such a soft-spot for him. The teen was amusing, his heroism honourable, but by the Vishanti was he naive. “Just proving a point.”

Peter sighed in relief before frowning back up at him. “How do I know you’re not lying?”

Stephen raised an approving eyebrow at him. So at least he was not completely gullible. “Are you dead yet?”

“No.”

Stephen gave him a pointed look and Peter sighed at the loss, practically projecting his pout through his mask. “Did that alert Mr. Stark?”

“No.”

“Why not?”

“I told you I would let you practice without Stark’s knowledge.”

“Won’t he be angry?”

A chuckle almost escaped him, and he rolled his eyes at the teen, hoping it didn’t show the fondness he felt bubbling up in his chest. “Should have thought about that before sneaking away from your class.” 

The teens shoulders drooped slightly, so Stephen maintained; “Might as well learn something.”

His mission could wait just a little while, and he could use the relaxation. Also, seeing the teen being so eager to stand up for what was right, he knew he would get himself in trouble eventually. Maybe perhaps he didn’t want Tony to have to deal with an injured Peter. 

Stephen knew well enough that there were plenty sorcerers who wouldn’t bat an eye at killing an innocent teenager, and even the ones that would, wouldn’t be aware of the Spiderman’s true identity.

Instead of answering, Peter gave him a considering look before quickly throwing a web at him and darting away. Stephen smirked as he easily deflected, turning around towards Peter who was weaving through the different artefacts and cases.

“Mr. Strange, sir,” he yelled, voice uncertain, “can we time out for a second?”

“Really?” Stephen sighed in exasperation. By the Vishanti, how did this kid become a vigilante? “First thing: it’s doctor. Second; you just initiated a fight and now you’re asking for a time-out? I can guarantee you that won’t work in real life.”

“No, it’s just that I don’t want to break anything.”

Stephen stilled, glancing around the hall. The kid was right. With a quick snap of his wrists he shifted them into the mirror dimension, ignoring Peter’s awes as he continued their little battle. The relic could wait a little longer.

* * *

“He did _what_?” Tony yelled in exasperation, burying his face in his hands and groaning into them.

“Relax,” Stephen replied, voice smooth as he was focussing on the food he was making. “I wouldn’t have hurt him.”

“_I_ know that,” Tony looked up from his hands, glaring at Stephen, “but _he_doesn’t know that.”

He was in the sanctum again, basically spending most of his time here now. JARVIS would alert him if anyone was looking for him, so he didn’t have to feel bad about it either. He could relax and enjoy watching Stephen in the kitchen, ignoring the smell of his cooking to focus on him instead. He was wearing casual clothes for once, loose sweatpants and a shirt Tony could swear had been his at some point.  
  
It was a good look, he couldn’t deny.

“I’m going to kill him,” Tony grunted, pulling out his phone and searching for Peter’s contact. The tracker luckily said he was back home by now, and he trusted May to keep an eye on him for tonight. He glanced back at Stephen from his place at the kitchen island. “What were you doing in the Smithsonian anyway?”

“I thought I wasn’t allowed to talk to you about my ‘evil-doing’,” Stephen smirked at him, glancing back down as he moved the pot off the stove.

Tony huffed. Sure, blame him for not wanting to be considered an accomplice.

They still fought. Or “fought”. 

It was mainly for show at this point, ramming each other against buildings until the homoerotic tension became too much and one of them snapped.

Tony noticed Stephen get rougher and rougher with the Avengers, the furious lines on his face sending sad waves trough him until he managed to pull his sorcerer’s attention back to him. 

His eyes always softened, always returned to their teasing, their eternal joy at being around Tony. He could swear he’d never had anyone in his life who lit up solely because he was around and Tony was addicted to it. Addicted to Stephen’s affection, his protection and passion.

He really had been an idiot for not noticing it sooner, for not figure Stephen’s true feelings out months ago, and the only excuse he had was that Stephen was an expert at hiding his emotions.

But these days they were always so clear, always present, never-ending.

But just like any addiction, it was ripping Tony apart from the inside. Tony hated it. Hated the feeling of watching people in terror, about not being able to do anything to help them. While at the same time his heart couldn’t help but sigh happily at the sight of Stephen.

Tony hated how he was angry at Stephen, despite the love the sorcerer so freely gave him. The love Tony couldn’t help but return.

Yet he felt his anger justified. It bothered him that he never knew what Stephen was up to. Wanted to be able to prevent Stephen from hurting anyone if possible.

Wanted to control his blasting range.

Every battle now he was terrified, terrified Stephen would cross a line he wouldn’t be able to forgive. Would break something between them that couldn’t be fixed.

Because he recognised that even if he wouldn’t be able to forgive something he were to do in the future, he would never be able to stop loving him. And that divide might one day be the end of him.

“And besides,” Stephen continued, pulling Tony out of his thoughts, “he did really well once he got into it.”

“Don’t you praise his stupidity,” Tony glared at Stephen, the man smirking at his words. _Wait a second-_ “How do you even know about him?”

Stephen’s smirk only deepened as he placed two plates on the table, putting what was left in the fridge for the other habitants of the sanctum. Tony shook his head in exasperation. He had guessed at the sorcerer following him around at times, but it was still weird to have it confirmed. “You’re such a stalker.”

He stood up from the barstool, heading over to the dining table. Stephen turned him once he was close enough, pulling him close and wrapping his arms around his torso from behind, talking close to his ear, voice maddeningly low. “Don’t be mad, my love. Can you blame me for not wanting to take my eyes off of you?”

“I can’t believe you’re making a massive breach of privacy sound cute.”

“You_ like_ the attention.” Stephen purred, placing a kiss underneath Tony’s ear, the touch sending shivers down his spine.

Damn Stephen for knowing him so well.

Tony turned around in his hold, pushing Stephen back with a dark look until he was sitting in one of the chairs. Their food was going to get cold, but that’s what microwaves were for.

He looked down at Stephen, smirking at being able to tower above him for once as Stephen’s hands fell to his hips, gaze fixed on Tony’s filled with hunger. “I still think you need to be punished.”

He leaned forward, agonisingly slow as he watched Stephen’s look darken, but before his lips finally reached Stephen’s, JARVIS spoke up from his earpiece, interrupting the moment.

“Sir, Rogers has called an emergency meeting and insisted on your presence.”

Tony wanted to groan, about to lean back out of Stephen’s space and check what JARVIS was on about, but Stephen didn’t let him. He growled before Tony could, grabbing his head and pressing him down, swiping his tongue over his lips to immediately ask for entrance. Tony melted under his touch - how couldn’t he - and he fell forward into Stephen’s lap, successfully having lost control to the sorcerer.

He almost forgot about JARVIS’ warning, and it took the AI reminding him for him to get enough self-control back to break the kiss between them. He couldn’t quite yet move off of Stephen’s lap though, but he took small victories.

“I really have to go,” he started, moving his hand up to brush a strand of hair away from Stephen’s forehead.

“Alright,” Stephen stated casually, allowing Tony to climb off of him. Tony smiled at him, before his expression faltered into a suspicious glare.

“You’re going to follow me aren’t you?”

Stephen stood up, brushing the wrinkles off his pants as he answered, “Well, my evening plans just cleared up so …”

Tony sighed and rolled his eyes, but leaned forward to tilt Stephen’s chin into a sweet kiss.

“In any case, I was promised to be punished for it so..”

Groaning, he bit at Stephen’s lips before forcing himself to lean back. “You better stop that right now.”

He’d never get out of here otherwise, and Steve had made clear his presence at the emergency meeting was mandatory. “And don’t meddle, or I’m not punishing _or_ praising you at all for the next week.”

“As if you’d make it that long,” Stephen only smirked, tapping Tony against the ass as the engineer turned away from him. Tony bit his lip to keep from dignifying that with an answer, and crossed his arms.

Stephen winked at his defensive stance and opened a portal into Tony’s bedroom. As soon as Tony had stepped through, Stephen was gone.

He rolled his eyes as he walked towards the door and made his way through the hall towards the meeting room, knowing he wasn’t alone for a second despite the empty hallways.


	13. emergency

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually almost forgot to add this chapter oops
> 
> thanks to the person commenting on About Him to remind me I have an AO3 account to run 😬
> 
> also thank you for al the lovely comments on this fic because I absolutely love all of them! 
> 
> This and the next chapter are going to be a little shorter again (around 2000 each) but the one after that is already over 3000 (though I might end up splitting it in two, who knows). I don't know about after that cause I haven't yet written it 👌🏻 
> 
> anyway I hope you enjoy it nonetheless and that you all have a lovely week!

He breathed in deeply before opening the door, immediately tensing up as soon as he noticed everyone already present. Rhodey was sitting next to the only empty spot, looking up at Tony with a slightly worried expression. Tony smiled to sate his best friend, ignoring everyone else in the room watching him carefully. 

He sat down, trying to fold into himself and take up as little space as possible. He had realised a while ago that keeping the attention off of him kept the meetings as short as possible. There were some hills he was willing to die on, some decisions he wouldn’t let up on, but until he knew what the meeting was about he could stay quiet. 

A pressure fell onto him, and Tony flicked his eyes towards the heavens to keep himself from reacting as an invisible body made himself comfortable in his lap, carelessly throwing an arm around his shoulder and leaning back against him. 

He could feel Stephen’s smirk in the air in front of him, but he composed himself, tightening his crossed arms over his chest as he glared at the wall opposite him. Rhodey glanced at him again, confused look on his face as he leaned closer. 

“Tones, are you okay?”

“Peachy,” Tony was proud of the easy smile he managed to pull off, but Rhodes still didn’t look convinced. Stephen was being obnoxious, yes, but at least he was enjoying himself instead of gearing up to kill the Avengers one by one. And it didn’t seem like he was going to take it farther than using him as a chair, which he was grateful for. “I promise, honeybear.”

He could feel Stephen stiffen on his lap, but Tony just rolled his eyes and smirked. 

As he took in the different Avengers talking between each other, he casually shifted Stephen so he was sitting more comfortably in his lap. Making it so that to anyone unaware of the sorcerer’s presence, it would look like a random shift in position.

Stephen relaxed back against him, apparently getting over his moment of jealousy. He wasn’t going to pretend he didn’t love the possessive streak in Stephen. Wasn’t going to deny the satisfaction coursing through him whenever it showed. In some twisted way, it was proof to Tony that he cared. And though he was already aware of the sorcerer’s love, it was nice to have it confirmed in these small ways nonetheless. 

Yes, Tony might pull it out of him purposefully, mention a random name and watch him react, but he wasn’t cruel enough to see it through for longer than necessary. Especially when he hadn’t meant to in the first place. After all, he definitely didn’t want Stephen to consider his best friend a threat. He cared too much about Rhodey’s wellbeing for that. 

Everyone seemed to be there already, yet the meeting wasn’t starting. If that wasn’t enough indication that nothing life-threatening was going on, he didn’t know what was. He sighed, already regretted having shown up at all, and took back his vow of silence; “is this meeting going to start or what? I was doing things, and would like to get back to that as soon as possible.”

The Avengers all looked at him, Rogers clearing his throat before ignoring Tony’s annoyance and starting the meeting. Natasha sent him a curious glance, but Tony ignored it, leaning back in his seat as he tried to tune out Rogers’ voice.

Tony could feel the air shift next to his ear, and it send shivers down his spine. 

A whisper pierced through the barrier of reality, quiet but clear. “I’m ‘things’ now, am I?”

Tony rolled his eyes and felt his scowl darken as his pulse started beating faster, but he kept his gaze fixed on Rogers as Stephen shifted in his lap. He leaned his back against Tony’s chest as he too focussed on the meeting, apparently unbothered by Tony ignoring him. He was fighting the urge to wrap his arms around Stephen’s waist and pull him closer; it would look ridiculous to everyone in the room who wasn’t aware of Stephen’s presence.

His thoughts were pulled back to Rogers as soon as he noticed everyone’s eyes on him. He frowned, refusing to look apologetic as he asked him to repeat his question. 

“I said that Sam and I were going to Greece to track down a lead.”

Tony frowned, and through his own confusion he didn’t notice Stephen tense against him. He leaned forward as much he could with the sorcerer still in his lap and turned his full attention on Rogers. “What lead?”

“You weren’t paying attention at all, were you?” 

“Are you even surprised,” Clint cut in from where he was leaning back on his chair. He was going for humor but missed the mark, tone a little too sharp. Tony didn’t care one bit, would have been fine ignoring the archer all-together, but apparently someone had other plans. 

A scraping heard over the floor was their only warning before Clint yelped and fell backwards, letting out a noise of pain as his back hit the ground. 

Tony might have been fooled by it being an accident, if physics didn’t contradict it. Clint’s chair hadn’t been back nearly far enough to be sent teetering backwards by his body mass. 

No one seemed to think twice about it though, so he only sent Stephen a warning glare as everyone was too busy either laughing at Clint, helping him get back up or in Natasha’s case, doing both. 

“Does it really matter at this point?” Tony groaned, continuing on as if nothing had happened, “Just whatever,” he waved everyone off as they turned their attention back to him. 

“So why call this ‘emergency’ meeting? Just to say you’re leaving the country? I’m pretty sure we’ll survive without the two of you for a few days.”

Rogers frowned back at him, as if he couldn’t understand how Tony didn’t recognise the importance of this meeting. Steve looked at him like that a lot. 

Tony wasn’t sure if it was a general lack of understanding of how Tony worked or just a dislike of his person. It made him feel like a child each time. He was aware that Steve had spent years in an ice berg, but he was still only in his mid twenties. Yet, he talked to Tony like _he_ was the pubescent teenager that was only around to be difficult. “You’ll be down two valuable players, Tony! You have to account for that.”

“Look, no offence,” Tony countered. He recognised he was being petty and starting unnecessary troubles, but they had gotten him into a bad mood. “But this could have been communicated through a company email. ‘Dear Avengers, we’re sad to inform you that you’ll be down two valuable players. Train accordingly and make sure to account for it in the on-call schedule. Take care. Love, Cap.’ That’s all it takes.”

Tony was so distracted by the argument that followed, that he didn’t notice Stephen’s presence fading away. As soon as he’d realised the sorcerer’s absence, however, he stopped in his tracks, swallowing back his words mid-sentence.

“Look,” he changed gears instead, and held up his hands in surrender as he already sensed at least three people about to interrupt him. “Fine. I’m sorry. But, we know now. You and bird man out of the country. Got it. Was that all?” 

Glancing around the room, he waited for an answer, and when no one spoke up, he excused himself. He barely paid anyone any attention - the confusion clearly keeping them from arguing - as he left. 

He had made it a few hallways until a voice called him back. If it hadn’t been Rhodey maybe he would have ignored it and continued on, nonetheless, but as it was, he could spare a few minutes.

Schooling his features into an effortless smile, he turned around to face his best friend. “What’s up, armadillo?”

“Armadillo, really?” Rhodey snorted, but there was something off. Tony could sense it in the air between them. “That’s your worst one yet.”

“Oh come on, with the armour?” He joked, trying to not make it obvious that he wanted to get back on his way. It was a horrible feeling, in a way. It wasn’t Rhodey’s fault either. He loved him, would always love him. He was his family, after all. “You can’t tell me it doesn’t fit.”

Rhodey didn’t answer, only rolled his eyes as a small smile tugged at his lips. There was that flash of worry again, though. Tony didn’t understand where it was coming from. In the meetings it might have been in place. Must be a habit at this point, to worry about Tony causing a scene.

But he was doing better than he had in a long while. He wasn’t spending excessive amounts of time in the lab anymore, actually getting a few hours of uninterrupted sleep in Stephen’s arms and had been eating better. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d gotten into an argument with Steve - at least from before today - and he was generally happier.

Rhodes must have caught on to his thoughtful expression, so tuned into each other by now after decades of knowing each other. They had lived together for years after all, seen both of each others’ lowest moments. Even if there had been periods of time where they’d barely seen each other for months - both having busy careers - they never lost that touch.

It made Tony feel uneasy, now. He didn’t want to feel it, but much like his love for Stephen it wasn’t something he could choose or control. Tony hadn’t kept anything from Rhodey since the Iron Man suit - except for when he was dying that one time but that’s neither here nor there.

He didn’t want to keep secrets from Rhodey, and he didn’t want Stephen to be a secret either. But he knew Rhodey wouldn’t approve, and he didn’t want to hear from one of the most rational and trusted people in his life all the ways his relationship with Stephen was a bad idea.

“Tones, are you okay?”

“I’m fine, Rhodey,” Tony smiled at him, feeling the knot built in his stomach as affection pulled at it. “I promise.”

Rhodey gave him a considering look, before his shoulders relaxed and he sighed shaking his head. Tony released a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding as he noticed the soft smile pulling at Rhodey’s lips. “Alright then.”

His smile turned into a smirk as he did a one-eighty and changed topics. “You’ve got a date for next week’s gala yet?”

Tony grinned back at his friend, falling back into their comfortable teasing easily. “You asking me out, platypus?”

“In your dreams,” Rhodey huffed, but he looked pleased, “I have to go now. Enjoy your night.”

And with one pointed look, he turned around and started walking back towards his own bedroom. Tony took a minute to watch him leave, before continuing on his way.

By the time he’d made it back to his bedroom, he’d already forgotten all about the meeting and Rhodey, mind solely worried about Stephen, and why he’d disappeared earlier. But when he walked into his bedroom, all worries immediately melted from his brain, much like everything else still hiding in there. 

For Stephen was laying on his bed, very much naked and - dear gods - tied up to his headboard with those dark red whips of his. 

He managed to stop himself from climbing onto the bed, however, narrowing his eyes at the sorcerer as he fought with his own stubbornness.

Stephen was watching him with amusement as Tony still couldn’t stop himself from pulling off his tie and starting at unbuttoning his shirt. “I told you you weren’t allowed to meddle.”

“You have no proof,” Stephen only smirked, and, well, thank god he made the tower soundproof.

Sense came back to him only a few hours later, when he was lying on his back in the middle of the bed, breath already returned to him and Stephen pressed closely against his chest, legs tangled with his. 

He carded his hands through Stephen’s hair, the sorcerer idly tracing the scars on his chest. When Stephen turned his head to look up at him, careful expression on his face, Tony couldn’t help but smile and kiss the frown on his face. 

“What?”

“You’re okay with Steve looking for Barnes?”

“Who?” Tony looked down at him in confusion, smile faltering slightly as he caught Stephen’s frown deepening.

“Barnes? The Winter Soldier?”

“Oh, is that what the lead’s about,” Tony rolled his eyes as it clicked. Steve had told him about Barnes a while ago, after he himself had found out about him still being alive. 

He hadn’t realised he was looking for him again, but he guessed most things from Sokovia were cleared up by now. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be? I can’t fault him for wanting to find his best friend.”

“You forgave him?”

“Well, it’s not like he was in control as the Winter Soldier,” Tony shrugged, “and honestly I don’t know much about him or what he did. Haven’t been really paying much attention.”

Tony frowned down at Stephen, tightening his arms around the sorcerer as he noticed the scowl forming on his face. The softness of earlier was fading out of his expression, harsh lines of anger cutting into his face as his blue eyes darkened. 

“Babe, what-,” Tony started, moving his hands to cup Stephen’s face, “Are you angry at me? I forgave _you_ didn’t I? Am still forgiving you for most of what you’re doing, I-“

“_No_, Tony,” Stephen interrupted him, pushing off his chest and sitting up, draping a leg over his waist so he was straddling him. “That’s not what I’m upset about.”

There was a dangerous edge to his voice, and Tony hated that he was aroused by it, pushing his libido aside to focus on the cause of Stephen’s anger. 

“Then what-,” His question was cut short by Stephen’s lips on his, Stephen pressing into him and blurring his mind. The sorcerer pulled back abruptly, mid-kiss, and when he did, the anger had shifted to something else. His eyes were distracted, frowning at a spot on the pillow next to Tony’s head as if confused. “What’s wrong?”

Stephen pushed away from him, Tony feeling the cold of the distance between their bodies as Stephen got off of his lap, and started picking up his clothing and pulling it on. “I’m sorry, Tones. I have to go.”

“What? Why?” Tony asked in bewilderment, mind trying to catch up to the sudden change in mood. 

“Emergency meeting of my own. I have to go speak with the Ancient One.” 

“Why?” Tony repeated, more urgently now as he sat up as well, glaring at Stephen. He wasn’t angry at the sorcerer, though perhaps just a little bit; always so cryptic, and leaving him on his own for the night. 

“Tones…” Stephen leaned over towards him as soon as he was dressed, pressing an urgent kiss to Tony’s lips before moving back. “I just need to check something with her. It’s important. I’ll see you tomorrow, I promise.”

And Stephen left, resigning Tony to think about why he’d suddenly disappeared. What he’d said to make the sorcerer leave so quickly. 


	14. catalyst

He arrived in Kathmandu around noon local time, the ancient temple wide awake and its inhabitants moving around its halls with purpose. He hadn’t been at Kamar Taj in a while, main focus on New York and Tony Stark, but it was still just as familiar, the old space having become home in the months he’d spent there studying and training. 

It didn’t take long for him to reach the chamber of the Ancient One. She refused to acknowledge the room as hers or an office, considering the sacred space open to everyone, but every habitant of the temple knew to find her there. It’s where she spent most of her time after all, and yes there was a desk, as even their leader knew the importance of enriching the mind. 

He threw all pretense out of the window as he burst through her doors, considering his news too urgent to worry about etikette. She didn’t startle at his rude entrance, merely turned around from where she’d been staring into the flames in the old, stone fireplace against the far wall. 

“Stephen,” she started, smile kind as she motioned for him to come in, ignoring the fact he already was. “What can I help you with?”

“You said the timeline had changed,” he started messily, realising he hadn’t stopped for a second to sort out his thoughts before coming here. He took a breath, focussing back on his realisation from earlier. “Rogers knows about Barnes. Yet Tony doesn’t. All signs lead to the Civil War still happening.” 

“Rogers has known about the Winter Soldier from before Sokovia.” Stephen felt all of his nerves buzzing with urgency, yet the Ancient One’s voice was calm, showing no indication of any of his words being of any concern. “It wasn’t avoidable and wasn’t supposed to be avoided.” 

“He knew about it before Ultron, yet he didn’t tell Tony?” Stephen spluttered in incredulity, anger starting to boil underneath his skin. “I thought Sokovia was what started the break of the Avengers?”

“If Sokovia hadn’t happened, Stark most likely would have never found out about it. Or if he had, it would have been under better circumstances and they could have worked through it.”

“It doesn’t _matter_,” The Ancient One interrupted him before he’d even started his outrage, causing Stephen to glare at her. “What _you _do next, _does._”

“What am I supposed to do?” Stephen balked, “_Not_ tell Tony that Rogers knows who killed his parents? And is actively looking for him to welcome him back into his arms?”

“You _are_ going to tell him,” she answered easily, making Stephen stop up short, squinting at her in suspicion. “More like, you’re going to _show _him. At Friday’s gala.”

Stephen’s stomach dropped as he stared at her in disbelief. He had known about the gala for a while, had known they were supposed to disrupt it and knew there were supposed to be casualties. If there weren’t, no one would care enough for it to be a big enough impact. They needed it, needed people in outrage, needed people to demand a change, to rally for safety. 

On top of that, the event would be a gathering of a bunch of important figures they needed to get rid of, the perfect shot to kill two birds with one stone. 

Yet, he’d been worrying about it for the last couple of weeks, knowing it would cause Tony to rethink everything they had built this far. Stephen wouldn’t even have blamed him. Even as Stephen’s own hands remained clean, Tony would never forgive him for standing by while people died. 

He’d still had hope, however, that maybe – just _maybe – _if Stephen managed to get Tony to fall in love with him before then, if he’d get Tony to _understand_ the importance of what they were doing, maybe he’d stay. Maybe he’d consider Stephen too important for him to leave. Maybe they could figure it out.

He knew Tony wanted it to work, but he also understood that for that to happen they needed compromises. And as it was, Stephen wasn’t able to give him anything worthy enough to match Tony’s love. 

And now he wouldn’t just have a hand in yet another attack, he’d have to throw a wrench into everything Tony knew. In all the progress he’d made. Stephen knew it wasn’t easy coming to terms with the death of a loved one, and to undo all understanding Stark had about the death of his parents _and _do it in front of everyone attending the gala… it was too cruel to be forgiven. 

Not only would he be picking at the wounds the loss of his family had left behind, he would be breaking up any bit of hope Tony had of building a new one with the Avengers. 

“If I do this, he’ll never forgive me,” Stephen ground out, mind going a hundred miles an hour, trying to find a solution. A possible way this could be fixed without doing what needed to be done. He wasn’t quite ready to throw in the towel, wasn’t ready to give Tony up yet even as he’d known it to be inevitable. 

“He will,” The Ancient One stated simply. It wasn’t confidence rolling off her, but ease. She was watching him with that imploring gaze of hers, trying to see a million different truths and possibilities. As if she was in at least five different moments at any one time. 

“How can you be so sure? We can find another way- We can still fight him in the end - Tony will be able to stop him, isn’t that the point? Isn’t that why he’s so important?” Stephen rambled, turning to start pacing around the room. He didn’t pace. Hadn’t paced since his student years, but he couldn’t help himself now. “Eliminating the witch should have been enough…”

“Miss Maximoff would have been a possible catalyst, but as you may well know there are multiple ways to break something that’s already cracked.” 

He believed in Tony. 

Avoidance was the best option, of course it was. Wanda had set a course of events in motion that shouldn’t have transpired. They had been trying to stop that from happening. Meddling where needed to stop the Avengers from falling apart even as Stephen hated it. 

They needed them together. 

But as much as they needed to be able to work on their team, they had other matters to attend to, and it was clear they couldn’t do both. Every time the Avengers tried fighting against the sorcerers, or any enemy really, more and more cracks appeared between them. 

Stephen knew that they were doomed in the end. Sokovia had already happened. Maybe if it hadn’t their team could have grown closer and bonded more, worked out their issues and difference, but Stephen was aware of Tony. Aware of the fact that the person that would have pulled them together in the end was drifting away, was being misled and broken in two. 

The witch had placed distrust amongst the team, aimed directly at the most important piece. 

It was the quake that set the ball rolling.

They needed to get it on a different path. Stephen trusted the Ancient One, trusted her when she said they needed to do this, but he knew it would be the cataclysm to his relationship with Tony. Perhaps he was selfish, but he couldn’t care about the world when all he wanted was to be in Tony’s arm. 

“He will be able to stop the mad Titan if it were to come to it,” she started, eyes piercing Stephen’s as he glanced at her hopefully, “but you won’t like the price he’ll have to pay. The price _you’ll_ have to pay.”

Stephen stopped in his tracks, snapping his head towards her as he felt his heart starting to break, anxiety coursing through him as it stopped and reset. 

_NO._ It couldn’t be- He wouldn’t. 

He wouldn’t let it happen. 

“We can still prevent it any other way! I can keep him safe!” He rarely yelled at her. She was to be respected after all, but he needed it to be the truth, needed it to happen. Any other option that would keep Tony safe and happy and with him. 

She stared at her, eyes pitying, and Stephen hated it, hated the feeling it sent through him. The feeling of powerlessness, a lack of control. He thought he’d gotten used to that. That it had been the reason he learned magic, the knowledge he’d gained at Kamar Taj; things can’t be controlled, and that’s okay. It’s the way of the universe. But feeling it used against him once more, after he already lost his hands, his profession, his passion, he couldn’t let it happen again. 

He had trusted her with everything up until now, but he couldn’t let this happen. Needed control back in his own hands. Needed to be fully prepared for anything. Couldn’t take the risk that she was lying, that there was any other possible path she had missed. “Show me.”

The Ancient One nodded her head in approval, already moving her hands in front of her, the Eye around her neck starting to glow. “As you wish.”

And he saw. He saw everything. Every possible path, every possible choice, every possible scenario. Ages passed, millennia passed, and time after time he saw Tony die in front of him. Felt every stab, every blow, every cracking of a skull like a punch to the chest. Every time he saw Tony’s eyes close, a piece of him died too. 

In some scenario’s Tony didn’t look at him, refused to, anger and hate clear in his features, and though those moments hurt, it was easier than when Tony clung onto him, whispering words of love in his ear with his final breath. 

The Ancient One had been right; every time the Mad Titan made it to earth, got hands on more than one stone, either half the universe died, or Tony did. 

It was equal in every way. 

Scale perfectly balanced. 

He would have picked Tony every time, but he knew he’d lose him either way. Knew Tony would be lost to his own self-hatred and guilt. Didn’t want to see the man he loved hurt in any way. 

Knew that every time one of his teens were to die it would be the end of him. Every time that friend of his - Rhodes - would leave his side he’d crumble to the floor and be unable to get up. 

Stephen knew he had no choice. They needed to prevent Thanos from coming to earth. Needed to succeed in their mission, put the earth back on its right path, even if it meant Tony would hate him forever. 

“If we can’t keep the Avengers together,” Stephen started as soon as he’d caught his breath, letting a feeling of calmth settle over him as he forced himself to be at peace with losing Tony. As long as he lived, as long as he was happy, even if it was without him. “What do we do then?”

“Keeping the Avengers together was the best option before. We have shifted our timeline enough that there is second option. What you must do now is not about rallying the Avengers, it’s about delivering the final blow.”

“Tell me,” he demanded, stepping closer towards her. 

“He must leave the Avengers of his own accord. He needs to come out on top.”


	15. past and future

The event was classy and refined, which meant, naturally, that it was boring as fuck. If the gala was in their honor, the least they could have done was hire a better DJ or perhaps a live pianist.

What they got instead were some speakers with ‘tasteful’ background music and a bunch of suck-ups begging for their attention.

Of course, Tony wasn’t going to complain out loud. It wasn’t really the event he had a problem with; it was that they had thrown it in the first place.

Sure, it was a nice gesture, but Tony hadn’t become a superhero to receive thanks. If he’d wanted to go to fancy events, he would have remained a weapons manufacturer. At least then, he could ditch without anyone batting an eye.

He had better things to do tonight, but he was stuck, forced to play nice, and smooch his way around. The worst part was that _they _were the ones needing to suck up to politicians and reporters, be charming enough to make the damage done to the city okay somehow.

Tony hadn’t been the one the cause it. _Had _been the one to pay for it, but somehow he was still forced to attend.

“Kind of makes you miss the old days, huh?”

He turned around to find Rhodey standing behind him, a sparkle in his eyes as he took a sip of champagne.

Tony’s eyes fell on the glass, reminded of Stephen, before smiling up at his oldest friend. “Yeah, not as fun without the strippers.”

Rhodey chuckled, shaking his head as he turned towards the crowd.

His friend had been right to miss the past, admittedly not for the strippers or random hookups. Things had been simple, and though Rhodey had often been gone, they still seemingly spent more time together than they got now.

Rhodey was busy working coordination with the military, and along with Tony’s own many responsibilities, there wasn’t a lot of time the two of them could spend together.

Tony felt guilt crawl up his chest, knowing the time he’d been spending with Stephen had definitely cut into any time he could have gotten with Rhodey. He couldn’t help it, however.

Even now, he was wishing he wasn’t here, missing the night he could have spent with Stephen, laying in his strong arms and tracing the veins on his neck and chest.

Especially since Stephen had seemingly gotten more affectionate in the last week. He was often quiet, which wasn’t unusual for him, but he held onto Tony, held him so tenderly it made Tony’s heartburn.

Rhodey glanced at him suspiciously at the forlorn sigh that managed to escape him, but he quickly schooled his expression, taking a sip of his whiskey and glancing around the room again. Perfectly timed, some guy in a uniform motioned Rhodey over, allowing Tony to relax.

He knew they probably wanted him to come along as well, but he made a quick excuse and headed in the other direction. Rhodey rolled his eyes at him but waved him off, used to his antics by now.

He made his way around the room, aimlessly, trying to avoid Steve’s gaze at least. Somewhere across the hall, Thor’s booming laugh echoed over the crowd. Maybe he could find Bruce and start a conversation, that ought to keep him busy for a while.

Suddenly he felt a soft pressure on his lower back, and he turned around to see who was touching him. He frowned when he found no one there, certain he could still feel a hand carefully guiding him.

His heart jumped pleasantly as a smirk formed on his face, smiling up at where Stephen’s face should be. The bastard was stalking him again, but Tony couldn’t mind, the sorcerer’s presence immediately lightening his mood and relaxing his shoulders. He sighed out a content smile as he stopped right before Stephen could lead him out of the room, digging his heels into the ground as he fought against his own desire.

“Not yet,” Tony hissed under his breath, hoping Stephen could still hear him over the sound of the surrounding crowd. “Can’t slip out again.”

The hand left his back, and Tony frowned at the loss of the touch, moving to stand against the wall. He might not be able to leave, but at least it was a little more quiet in this corner, a little more secluded. He sincerely hoped Stephen hadn’t left when Tony couldn’t head out. The sorcerer’s presence was always calming, and just the touch now had been enough to relax him to the bone.

A second later, however, he was cursing his own wish. Stephen, never one to shy away from playing dirty, was trailing kisses down Tony’s neck, ghost lips sending shivers down his back as he managed to hold back a surprised moan.

“Asshole,” he cursed instead, trying not to show anything off with his body language.

Soft fingers trailed over his cheek, and he sighed, glancing around the room in contemplation. Everyone seemed busy enough, and a glance at his watch showed it was getting on the late side anyway. No one could really blame him for getting away just for a little while, in need of some fresh air.

No one noticed him slipping out, and Tony took a second to be grateful for small victories as he made his way through the hall. He’d been in this particular event hall before, and he made his way over towards a balcony looking out over the city that he’d used as an escape the last time he’d been there.

As soon as he’d stepped out into the cool autumn weather, hands were pushing against his chest, crowding him against the wall as Stephen materialised out of thin air and pressed his lips against Tony’s.

Tony smirked into the kiss, eagerly moving his hands to Stephen’s hair to pull him closer.

“Missed you,” he managed to murmur between breaths, the sorcerer humming against his lips in response. Stephen’s hands dropped to his waist, pressing their hips together eagerly.

It was so easy to get lost in Stephen. To focus on the soft tremors of his hands as they moved over his body, and forget all of his worries. To forget Steve, and the Avengers and the gala and aim his attention solely to the lips against his.

“Wait,” Tony broke the kiss, framing the sorcerer’s face with his hands as he pushed him back. He tried to fix Stephen with a stern gaze edging on a glare, but he didn’t really fear the answer. “Are you just here to distract me again? Is there going to be an attack?”

Stephen stayed quiet, eyes roaming Tony’s face, carefully neutral, and Tony felt his gaze darken as his features fell into disbelieving disappointment.

He had asked the question more out of jest, trusted Stephen not to use him like this. He had proven time and time again that he could keep both sides of their relationship separate.

At least he had the decency not to lie to him.

Tony growled, starting to push Stephen away so could head back inside. His heart twisted painfully but Stephen’s hands were on him, holding him back. “Tony wait.”

“Give me one good reason to,” Tony glared at Stephen, hating how his stomach fluttered at the soft plea in Stephen’s eyes.

“You’re going back inside. You’re going to fight the sorcerers and you will lose. Your presence won’t change that just as how my absence won’t.” Tony scowled at the words. He knew Stephen was right. They had been losing for months, and even the satisfaction of keeping them form their price for a little while would be short-lived. “Tony, some things are just out of your control. Today’s events are decided by a force way bigger than the both of us.”

Tony now understood little of what the sorcerers were trying to do. And though he wanted to trust Stephen when he said it was wat was best for the world in the long run, he couldn’t get over the single losses. Couldn’t get over the feeling that maybe if he worked hard enough, thought long enough and became strong enough he would be able to keep everyone safe.

He knew death was part of life, as was loss, he knew it more than anyone. But the deaths due to terrorist attacks felt too senseless. Too illogical to be anything but a horrifying tragedy.

It was terrible to see people get more and more used to it. Had passed the stage of cowering away in their homes and were starting to go out in public again, very much aware of the dangers yet not caring anyway.

In a way it was inspiring, Tony couldn’t help but think, but as they continued being strong and resilient and kept going out again and again and again… Tony wanted to protect those people. Wanted those people to be rewarded for their bravery instead of criticised for their stupidity.

Tony wanted to trust Stephen, but he didn’t want to believe he was right. Didn’t want to know there was no other way.

“Tony, _please-,_“ Stephen pleaded, and it seemed so foreign that Tony stilled. He gazed in Stephen’s eyes in confusion as he tried to search for what Stephen knew that he didn’t. “Please, things will be so much better if you could just walk away. If you’d let me -“

“Can you promise that no one will lose their life today?” He pierced Stephen’s gaze, hard and determined, hand still clutched to his upper arm. His treacherous fingers dug deeper, loving the feeling of Stephen against him. Stephen stayed quiet, which was enough answer he needed. He stepped away from where Stephen had him pinned against the wall, the sorcerer doing nothing to stop him.

Tony almost wished he did. Wished he’d try to keep him there by force, would hurt him or just generally would give him any reason to stop loving him.

He hurried back inside, sparing Stephen one last look. He was watching Tony tentatively, sad eyes trained on his face.

* * *

Tony almost didn’t go. He was angry about so many things, but most of all he was angry that Stephen had been right. They’d fought the sorcerers, too late to get everyone out of the building, and they had lost. More ridiculous of all, _Tony _had lost.

Three of his team members - though they were not necessarily people he agreed with or particularly liked, Tony had trusted them - had lied to him. Had kept secrets. Had played him. Had thought so lowly of him that he’d lose it at the news of his parents having been murdered. As if any person who were to find out such a vile thing didn’t have the right to snap.

They had kept secrets. And played him enough to allow them to search for the killer. Not to apprehend him, punish him and lock him up as not to hurt anyone else, but to what? Forgive him? Pardon him? Get him to join to Avengers?

He was still reeling, still feeling the ice run through his veins as the massive projection, in the middle of the fight against the sorcerers, had played the footage of an isolated road at midnight, December 16th, 1991.

Could see Rogers’ face as he stared at him like he was a rabid animal, about to end everyone in the room.

_“Did you know?” He had asked, not missing how Romanoff shifted closer, just the tiniest bit. How everyone in the room was watching him. Some with pity, others with the same trepidation as Rogers. The fight had gone out of him as one by one the sorcerers left, clearly having done what they had meant to._

_Stephen hadn’t been part of the fight, but Tony almost wished he had. _

_He focussed back on Rogers, vision reddening as he saw the answer he’d been looking for in Rogers’ eyes. He couldn’t understand how he’d missed it. Steve was a terrible liar when put on the spot. _

_Clearly his morals hadn’t interfered with looking into Tony’s eyes with the knowledge of his parents’ fate. Of his _mother’s _fate. He could feel angry tears starting to blur his already hazy vision, everyone in the room as tense as could be. _

_Tony took a few minutes, hidden in his armour that stood still as a statue, as he watched more and more Avengers shift slowly, moving so that most of them were standing on Rogers’ side of the room, quiet apprehension clear on their faces. _

_Sam, Clint, Scott, Maria.._

_The message was clear as could be. _

_At least Thor and Bruce were still in the middle of the room, watching Tony with apprehension, yes, but more to keep a fight from escalating than worry about Tony’s actions._

_“Tones?” The hand on his shoulder had been what had finally snapped him out of his daze, but he couldn’t look up at Rhodey. Didn’t want to watch the man who’d been there for him when he’d gone through the loss of his parents. The man who had sat by his side at their funeral, had dragged Tony there in the first place. The man whose family had taken him in, allowed him to celebrate the holidays with them and make sure he still had people to lean on. The man who’d formed the basis of his sanity. _

_He would break down if he did. Didn’t want to be reminded of any of it. Wanted to forget what he’d seen before it was burned in his brain for good. _

_He’d turned and fled. _

He had ended up at the Sanctum three hours later.

He hadn’t planned to come, but he had anyway. Had grown tired of drinking, had grown tired of flying to distract himself, had grown tired of the voice in his head. And despite how angry Tony was at him, Stephen was still the one person who always managed to make him forget. Was still his escape.

So he was back at the sanctum, the doors easily opening up for him. The building was busier than usual, the sorcerers from earlier still in New York and milling around the building. They stopped their conversation as he walked by, but they only watched him with interest, not caution. Didn’t look at him like he was a time bomb about to go off.

He found Stephen in his bedroom, sitting on the edge of his bed as he stared out the window. His head snapped towards Tony at once, brows furrowing as surprise and acceptance warred on his face.

There was something in his eyes Tony hadn’t seen before. He always kept his emotions expertly hidden, except for the few times Tony managed to lower his guard. Tony always revelled in those moments, the glances he got at the affection the sorcerer felt for him.

Now it was more like a calm sadness, though Tony knew there was more emotions in his irises than Tony could probably ever describe. As much as he wished he could, he still couldn’t always read the sorcerer. More often than not he was a complete mystery.

Tony hated things he couldn’t understand, yet here he was in love with the sorcerer that in so many ways was still an enigma.

He had one leg pulled onto the bed with him, the other dangling over the edge, half turned towards Tony.

“How long have you known?” Tony asked, his own voice strange to his ears.

“For a long while. Before we even knew each other,” Stephen’s voice was low and dark, and it took Tony a second to recognise the tone as angry. “I was under the impression that Rogers had told you. That you _knew, _Tony. I only realised you didn’t about a week ago, after the meeting.”

Tony swallowed against the burning coal stuck in his throat. It explained the sudden anger he had seen on Stephen’s face, the reason he’d left so quickly. He still didn’t know where the hesitation and fear had come from after, but that didn’t matter right now.

What mattered was that Stephen had forced his hand. Had forced the Avengers’ hand. Had forced him into the situation at the gala in the first place.

He would have been fine not knowing, or in the very least, have been told instead of shown, the image of his mother struggling for her last breath still flashing in front of his eyes.

He gritted his teeth, hoping his voice didn’t sound too hoarse as he continued, “Why not tell me? Why like this?”

“It’s what needed to happen.” Tony watched the sorcerer, watched his face, hard as stone, and noticed the exhaustion in his eyes, the sadness and determination.

What he couldn’t find, however, was regret.

He remembered Stephen’s pleas, had known Tony would get his heart broken, but wouldn’t be able to walk away from the Avengers, from people getting hurt.

Tony wanted to be angry at him. Wanted to yell about having been played. But he couldn’t. Stephen had been right, had only wanted to protect him from the truth. He had never lied to him once, the truth delayed but not omitted completely. Even if it meant they were enemies.

And they weren’t. Not anymore.

He had been right about another thing as well; Tony couldn’t save everyone. No one could. But he was going to try his damn hardest to save as many people as possible.

He walked up to him slowly, the sorcerer watching him carefully. He opened his arm once Tony was close enough in hopeful invitation, and Tony gladly stepped closer, wrapping his arms around his torso as Stephen pulled him onto his lap and enveloped him in a hug. He could feel Stephen’s chest against his, could feel the soft breath of relief that he couldn’t hold back. The sorcerer’s scent made everything okay, even as silent tears started rolling down his cheeks. The way he felt warm and comfortable and safe and loved.

“I thought you’d be angry with me.” The whisper was soft, voice wavering slightly, and Tony wrapped his arms tighter around Stephen.

“You weren’t the one who lied.”

“I could have just told you …”

“This was part of your plan to save the world?” Tony interrupted him, leaning back to cup Stephen’s face.

“Yes…,” Stephen breathed out, and despite it all Tony still couldn’t see any regret. It was enough for Tony.

Tony kissed him, clearly much to Stephen’s surprise.

He could feel him still against his lips, before hesitantly responding, quickly turning desperate, as if he couldn’t believe Tony really still wanted to kiss him, wanted him, and was about to change his mind any second. “I trust you.”

Despite it all, despite how little the sorcerer cared about the general human population, he trusted Stephen to do right by _him_.

Stephen had told him that he couldn’t hurt Tony. And Tony had understood because he’d very much felt the same. So if Stephen told him it had been what needed to happen, he knew he was speaking the truth.

It didn’t matter what the team thought, it didn’t even matter that Tony himself thought he was a failure, only managing to ruin everything despite his best efforts, Stephen loved him as he did Stephen, and Tony was starting to think that perhaps that was all it took.

“I want to be in control,” he muttered into the sorcerer’s neck, Stephen pressing a soft kiss against his crown.

“I know, love.”

“Tell me about the Big Plan or whatever. Tell me exactly what needs to happen.”

“I can’t,” Stephen sighed hesitantly, making Tony frown at him, “for the simple reason of I don’t know. Only the Ancient One does.”

“Because us knowing would affect the outcome?” Tony guessed, exhaustion washing over him. Stephen nodded, but it didn’t even matter. Tony didn’t care.

Because he was done being on a different side as Stephen. He was done having to deal with the Avengers. He was done with losing.

It was time he took matters into his own hands.


	16. important

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is for everyone ignoring their family today whether you're celebrating the holidays or not ✌🏼

Tony woke up with a gasp, his whole body tense, fighting against Stephen’s arms, which tightened around him. His lungs still screamed for air, and Stephen’s embrace fell away from him as he moved to sit up. 

He needed space, needed time for his mind to wake fully, and catch up with reality. 

“Tony?” Stephen’s voice was clear, piercing through the sound of his mother’s screams still ringing through his ears. A firm but scarred hand cupped his neck, and the cool touch became his sole focus. His breathing stabilizing as he focussed on the sensation, only turning to look at Stephen once it was under control. 

He sighed as soon as his eyes locked with Stephen’s blue ones, and it took a few minutes of staring and Stephen rubbing comforting circles against his skin with his thumb for him to be able to expel the images completely. The stress in his muscles took a little longer to fade away, but Tony let himself be pulled back against Stephen, easing as he could hear the sound of Stephen’s heartbeat through his torso. 

He felt horrible with the cold sweat still sticking to his skin, and the room was at least two degrees hotter than it was supposed to be, but Tony needed the sorcerer’s warmth anyway. Stephen kicked back the sheets, allowing the cold air to brush their bodies as he held onto Tony, the engineer digging deeper against his chest. 

He hated it. Hated the panic still stuck in his chest, the heaviness on his body holding him down while at the same time his muscles were aching with the need to get up. Get ahead of the situation, even if there was no situation to get ahead of. Not immediately anyway. 

Everything would happen in time, as it was supposed to, but Tony couldn’t shake the feeling that he was supposed to _now._ That he would miss something.

To make matters worse, even as he was lying against Stephen, he couldn’t get his mind off of the video, the pain that had edged his way underneath his heart throbbing as a reminder. 

Tony rolled away from Stephen, the sorcerer letting go of him at once. He checked the time, finding it to be only five in the morning, the sky outside still dark.

He tied his watch around his wrist, leaving it dark as he was afraid to catch a glimpse of the news, knowing the events of the gala must have already been outed, the trending topic at the moment.

He didn’t know what he was more afraid of; their opinion on the Stark’s having been murdered, or whether or not they would stand with the Avengers. 

“Tony?” He glanced back towards Stephen, also sitting up now, holding out a hesitant hand. “Let’s go get some breakfast.” 

“I’m not hungry.”

“Too bad, but I don’t care,” Stephen huffed haughtily, making Tony roll his eyes at him but submit easily enough. He couldn’t stay in bed any longer anyway, wouldn’t be able to get any more sleep, and needed to keep his mind distracted. 

He pocketed his phone off the nightstand and took Stephen’s hand as the doctor pulled him off the bed. Taking a second to appreciate Stephen in his casual look - sweatpants and another one of Tony’s t-shirts, he let himself be pulled along, keeping heir hands linked as they stepped into the empty hallway and made their way down to the kitchen. 

The sanctum was quiet again, most sorcerers asleep or having returned to Kamar Taj. Tony was glad for it. He knew it was only a matter of time. If he truly were to stand with Stephen, the sorcerers would become his allies instead of enemies. Yet, for now, he appreciated the tranquility. 

As they reached the kitchen, Tony immediately beelined for the coffee machine, glad for the bag of expensive beans he’d stashed there earlier. They made their respective drinks without talking, comfortable in the silence as they moved around the dark space. 

With his coffee mug in hand, he went to stand next to Stephen, still working on his tea, and leaned against him, the warmth and scent of the sorcerer pulling him in. 

“So…,” Tony started, letting go of his mug with his left hand so he could grab Stephen’s right one as it was resting on the countertop in front of them. He linked their fingers together, inspecting the scarred flesh in the moonlight streaming in from the windows. Stephen moved to pull his hand back, but Tony didn’t let him, putting up light resistance as not to hurt him as he kept his hand securely in his. “What happened to your hands?”

The sorcerer had done a great job covering up his past for the Avengers. Tony clearly remembered the first few days after having fought Stephen - no, doctor Strange - for the first time. He’d scoured the internet looking for anything on the mysterious villain. Yet all he’d been able to find were articles on Neurology and praise for the accomplished surgeon. 

His resume was surely impressive, as were the many pictures of Stephen in a suit. Still, it didn’t explain why said neurosurgeon was suddenly throwing around orange sparkly mandalas and causing terror in Sydney. 

It had been hard for him to reconcile the two. He’d been sure Strange had been the evil twin, but every source claimed Stephen to have been born alone. 

Further proof came in the form of a lack of evidence of doctor Stephen Strange even existing after the summer of 2014. He hadn’t been able to find anything, and the only person at General Metro Hospital that even seemed to remember Stephen refused to give up his “personal information.” 

It had been infuriating. 

He’d noticed the scars before - not too difficult to figure out why he’d stopped operating once he knew - but he had no idea how it had happened. Stephen had gloves he wore often, but Tony loved his hands, and he was grateful any moment they weren’t covered up. 

“You want to know about my hands?” Stephen turned to him with a raised eyebrow, watching Tony with wary eyes. “After all that’s happened, that’s what you want to know?”

“It might cheer me up,” Tony teased, though it didn’t feel as airy as he’d wanted it to be. Stephen looked at him, eyes sad but intense. Tony was used to it by now, used to how Stephen needed a few seconds to search his face, to confirm his reading of the engineer. “Please?”

The sorcerer’s sigh turned into a chuckle in the dark, squeezing his hand with all the strength he had. 

“I was in an accident. My car drove off a cliff, and the shattered glass cut my hands to pieces.” Stephen’s voice was quiet yet clear in the empty of the early morning, and Tony observed him as he continued, eyes distant as he focussed on memories rather forgotten. “They put in eleven stainless steel pins.”

Tony took a moment to stay quiet, wait in silence for if the sorcerer wanted to add anything. That didn’t seem the case, though, rather Stephen sinking further into unwanted flashbacks. The shadows on his face accentuated his sadness, and Tony’s heart ached for him. It was refreshing to focus on someone else’s pain instead of his own. To know that Stephen was there, and in a way just as messed up as Tony. That he wasn’t alone. 

“So, how did that lead to you becoming a sorcerer?” Tony asked, hoping to pull Stephen away from the past and back to him. Or at least a somewhat better time in his life. 

“I thought there was a cure at Kamar Taj,” Stephen shrugged. 

“Was there?”

Stephen watched him with a strange look, tilt at his lip making Tony smile and relax. “There was.”

“Then why didn’t you use it?” he frowned down at their hands. His thumb traced one of the more prominent scars on Stephen’s index finger before he pulled them up to press a soft kiss against the back of his palm. 

“I found something I needed more.”

“Magic?” Tony chuckled, leaning back and taking a sip of his forgotten coffee, placing the cooling mug on the counter after. 

“Purpose.”

Tony rolled his eyes but used their linked hands to pull Stephen into a kiss, nonetheless. 

Purely for the sensation of Stephen’s lips against his, was he glad he’d come here the night before. Being able to lay and talk with him had been wonderful, allowing him almost to forget everything; allowed him to focus on Stephen instead, on the man he loved today instead of the parents he’d lost way too young. But something about kissing Stephen was like coming home. 

He needed that, was addicted to it, to that feeling of safety and ease, the way Stephen was warm and careful, able to read him like a book and give him exactly what he needed. 

Stephen was the one who pulled back, and Tony wasn’t above whining for him in disgruntlement. He blinked his eyes open in annoyance to find Stephen watching him, chuckle clear in his eyes that quickly turned soft. “Someone’s at the door for you.”

“Here?” Tony frowned, immediately on guard. His fingers still locked with Stephen’s started tensing, so he pulled them back. Stephen placed a quick kiss on his cheek before stepping away, giving him a view of the hallway through the kitchen door. 

A distant voice called for his name, and Tony frowned as he recognized it as Rhodey’s. 

He quickly went in search of his best friend, finding him in the income hall, doors closing behind him right when Tony walked in. The war machine suit just visible outside on the curb. He looked around the space with wary eyes, putting Tony on guard as he watched his best friend. 

He trusted him, and a huge part of him immediately eased at the sight of him, but he didn’t know how he’d react. What he would say if he found out Tony had found solace in the space of their enemies. Had stood behind murderers without batting an eye. Rhodey was valiant, had always had morals even stronger than Tony’s, though he’d mostly stuck to the rules to decide for him in the end. Had trusted them to be right. 

“Rhodey?” His voice was cautious even to his own ears, and he flinched slightly at the sound, hoping Rhodey wouldn’t notice. Rhodey’s head snapped towards him at once, his shoulders relaxing as his eyes found Tony’s. 

“Tones..” 

Tony recognized the sympathy in his voice, immediately tightening the rope around his heart. It wasn’t just his usual worry; instead, he recognized it as the signature tone he’d used after the death of his parents. Even nearly thirty years later, he still remembered it clear as day. 

“How did you find me?” 

Rhodey must have read his hesitation, collecting himself easily, and changing his posture to his usual air. “JARVIS snitched on you.”

Tony rolled his eyes, tapping his watch to get his AI’s attention, glad for the excuse to look away from Rhodey for a bit. “Really, JARVIS?”

“You haven’t disabled Colonel Rhodes’ access to your location, sir.”

Tony huffed at his disloyal AI but focused on his friend instead, finding it easier now that the topic of his parents was shoved aside for the moment. “So… why are you here?”

“Really, Tones? You think I’d just let you run off like that?”

“I don’t know if you’ve realized, but this is the sorcerer’s base of operations.”

“Yeah, you think I wouldn’t figure out that the sexual tension between you and Strange had mysteriously disappeared?”

Tony squinted at Rhodey’s smug smile, trying and failing to find a response. He had hoped to be smart enough to at least have a decent affair without anyone finding out, but he guessed it hadn’t been fair to underestimate Rhodes like that. He knew Tony better than Tony himself most days. 

It had always been weird to Tony how that could be true. It proved itself again and again, yet Tony couldn’t believe Rhodes could see the real him but stick around, could know the depths of who Tony was yet still praised him the way he did. Treated him the way he did, trusted him with his life. 

His own father had thought him a failure and disgrace.

Rhodey sighed, Tony, relaxing at the sound. “I’m not fighting you again, Tony. I’m with you.”

Tony continued staring at him, his mind a little slow today after all he’d needed to process in the last twelve hours. 

He really had been by his side all these years. He’d always looked out for him, trusted him even as he’d always been skeptical of his judgment. Tony still didn’t understand how he could be worthy of his love; he was only grateful for it every day. 

Rhodey’s gaze shifted to something behind him as he continued, “I may not trust _him_, necessarily, …”

Tony turned to find Stephen having joined them, leaning against the door frame of the living room. He was looking at Tony, careful for his expression, watching out for him as usual. Tony smiled at the sight. Not invisible this time. 

“… but I guess I’m willing to listen.” 

“Look,” Tony sighed, turning back towards Rhodey, “we’re not sure what we’re doing either. But I can’t- I can’t go back to the Avengers.”

“You think I’d ask you to?” Rhodey huffed in incredulity, anger making its first appearance on his face, “You’ve already given them too much to also give them your forgiveness.” 

Tony rolled his eyes, fixing his gaze on the floor. Rhodey was right, and he was aware, but he hated how he couldn’t both save the world the way he needed to and have the good grace of the Avengers. He didn’t know why he so desperately craved it, even after all they’d done to him, but he couldn’t help the feeling of needing to have their approval. Or at the very least have them proven wrong about him. 

“What do you need, Tony?”

What did he need? 

It was a strange notion. Over the last few months, he’d always compromised for everyone else’s needs. Worried about the Avengers above all else, considered it an indirect approach at making sure the earth had everything it required. The only thing he’d permitted himself having been his relationship with Stephen. Already feeling too selfish over that one want. 

But after last night, he was done feeling sorry for himself. No more Avengers. He was going to save the world directly as he’d always planned to. Rogers wasn’t going to hold him back anymore. No one was. 

“I need your eyes and ears, a shower - Stephen,” he turned around to look at his boyfriend, who raised a questioning eyebrow at him, and winked, “you can join me - a state of the art lab, a fresh cup of coffee and Harley Keener.”

“Harley?” Rhodey frowned at him, expertly ignoring his comment about the shower, “the kid from Tennessee? What do you need him for?”

Tony shrugged, a smile forming on his face as he glanced from Rhodey to Stephen. “I need his … energy.”

Rhodey smirked back at him, stepping forward as Tony let himself be enveloped in a hug. “Good to see you egocentric again, Tones.”

Tony sighed as relief flooded through him, clinging onto Rhodey as best he could. He needed the reminder, the confirmation that the most important people were still here. Stood with him. As long as that was the case, he could be fine. He could make it through the day. 

His parents weren’t anymore alive than they were yesterday, but his family was still here, stood with him more than Howard ever had. 

Tony stepped away from Rhodey with one last pat on the back, determination firing up his brain as he motioned past Stephen towards the rest of the building. 

“Well, welcome to the sanctum, then.” 


	17. system changes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy 2020 everyone!

“It’s been seventy-three hours, and he still hasn’t resurfaced,” Steve ground out as he glared at the map laid out on the table in front of him. 

The sight had Rhodey in need to hold back a smile. He’d argued with Tony about letting the Avengers stay in the tower, but he couldn’t help admire Tony’s petty genius. 

He’d given them enough to take away their right to complain, as they should have already been eternally grateful had Tony lent them a handkerchief. Yet, he’d shut down FRIDAY and every other bonus feature Tony had brought to the team.  
  
The tower was nothing but a building at this point. 

The lab had been safely locked down, no one able to go in no matter how hard they tried, along with the extra equipment, leaving the team with nothing but what they had on them at the Gala, and no FRIDAY to help their searches or project their screens. 

No FRIDAY also meant no automatic lighting, which meant Rhodey had already had the pleasure of watching the team members frantically searching around the dark rooms for the light switch they’d never had to use. He’d only hoped Tony had the mind to record it for later enjoyment. 

They were small things, but enough to constantly bother them and remind them of their mistakes. Rhodey knew Tony still controlled the tower for the most part - _he_ didn’t have to search around for lightswitches as FRIDAY still liked him - and he knew at some point the Avengers would come to that same conclusion. 

For now, they were under the impression that Tony would come back to them eventually, that he would end the wallowing in his own misery and swallow down his pride to rejoin their forces. But eventually, they would have to realize this wasn’t a minor hiccup. This wasn’t something that Tony would have to get over and move on from. 

Rhodey assumed that as soon as they realized Tony wasn’t just gone, wasn’t just stepping away, but was instead doing his own thing; they would realize the tower was too compromised. Tony hadn’t mentioned anything about taking down the Avengers, only focussed on protecting the world, but Rhodey silently hoped part of saving the world would mean leaving the Avengers in shambles.

At least get rid of the so-called captain. 

“Is there really no way of finding him?” Steve directed his question at Bruce, the doctor having stayed quiet up until now. There was a tension set in his shoulders, and Rhodey recognized it as him trying to keep his anger under control. Thus far, he wasn’t tingeing green yet, but the Hulk liked Tony and therefore was probably throwing quite the hissy-fit along Bruce’s own upset. 

“No equipment is quite as advanced as Tony’s,” Bruce sighed, rubbing his forehead. He looked exhausted, most likely hadn’t been getting a lot of sleep. “And even if we were to find something to locate him, we still don’t have anything to go on. He’s been working on stealth technology for years, including making his energy signatures untraceable.”

“Scott?” 

The engineer jumped up from where he’d been hiding in the corner, staring at Rogers as his attention rested on him. “Ye- yup? Yes?”

“What about The Wasp? Can she substitute for Tony for the time being?”

Scott cringed, pulling back into himself as his fingers darted around the air in nervous movements. “Yeah, I don’t think she’s going to take well to being Tony’s ‘replacement.’ Besides, she’s still working on getting her mom back, so I don’t think she’ll sympathize with you right now.”

Steve’s face hardened, blinking down at the map again as he clenched his teeth, muscles tensing. 

“Look,” Clint cut in, making Steve look up at the archer, clearly glad for the attention having been pulled off him. He was lounging in one of the chairs, looking around the room in annoyed boredom. “Why not just focus on finding the sorcerers?”

“We can’t go against them without Tony! He’s always been our best bet against them,” Maria argued from where she’d been pacing back and forth, working the red stress ball in her left hand. “We have to solve this first.”

“But the sorcerers are the real problem! There is a reason I didn’t tell him about Bucky!”

“Every man deserves to know the fate of their parents,” Thor growled, for the hundredth time. The main argument had been between him and Steve over the last three days, so much so that they were running in circles around each other; Thor the one who was right, but Steve too stubborn to give in. 

The god speaking up on Tony’s behalf had been a surprise to Rhodey, aware there had never been any love lost between the two of them. Sure, Thor had always been a bit of an outsider, mostly standing above all of the members of the team.

Rhodey felt it only natural; the god had lived for a lot longer than any of them, and by far a lot more powerful than he was probably given credit for. Steve had taken the role of leader, Tony the opponent keeping him challenged, and with the others used to or preferring to stay in the background, it left little space for the Asgardian in said dynamic. 

On top of that, he was often off-world, having his own issues to deal with, but allowing him to fall out of touch with the team's going-ons. 

Even now, Rhodey recognized the choosing of sides wasn’t personal, wasn’t the Asgardian finally picking a side or making a stand, but simply him standing up for his own values and deciding what he was willing to condone or not. Rhodey could respect that, but he couldn’t deny it still left a bitter taste in his mouth. Perhaps because, for him, it was very much personal. 

“So he could find Bucky and kill him? He’s innocent!”

“If you think Tony is the kind of person to need revenge, you don’t know him very well.” Bruce sighed, rubbing his face as he glared around the room. 

“If he isn’t angry, then where is he?” Steve fired back, arms crossed, and chest puffed in defense. 

Rhodey wanted to punch him, but he kept his hands safely locked in his armpits as he bit his tongue. He needed to be able to stay in the Avengers without suspicion. If that meant staying in the background and keeping attention off of him like a fly on the wall, so be it. There was a reason he’d been able to work his way up in the military, after all. 

Luckily for him, he wasn’t the only one acknowledging Tony’s side of the story, and if Thor and Bruce weren’t already two massive powerhouses in their own right, this would have been where they’d earned his respect. 

“Oh, he’s angry, alright,” Thor cut in, booming voice filling the room, “as are we. He’s allowed to be, but anger does not equal vengeance.”

“Either way,” Steve argued, as he glanced behind him to confirm Natasha and Sam’s presence at his sides. Sam looked at him and nodded, but Natasha’s gaze was fixed elsewhere. She was eyeing Vision, the man looking back at her with cold neutrality. “He should have stayed so we could have explained.”

“We?” Bruce cut in, looking at Natasha, whose eyes flicked towards him at the words directed towards her, “you all knew?”

“We knew of the assassination, not whether or not Bucky was the one who’d done it.” Her voice was calm, almost soothing, showing no signs of any of this wearing on her. Rhodey wondered if she had a conscience behind her cold exterior or if she truly only did what people asked of her. He’d never known her to do anything else. 

“If you weren’t even sure, then why not just tell him? You clearly must have known enough to put the pieces together,” Bruce argued again, clearly getting agitated now, but he swallowed it down with impressive ease. “So you and Cap? What about you, Sam?”

“I did,” Sam sighed, looking the most regretful out of all of them. Rhodey had always liked the man, so maybe he was willing to be more lenient towards him. Either way, he could respect a man standing beside his best friend no matter how stupid his choices. 

There had been times Tony had put him in similar positions, and though those moments had always turned out to be right and fair, he couldn’t blame a man for taking the risk and blindly trusting his friend. “but it wasn’t up to me. And honestly, he reacted a lot better than expected for someone who just lost their support system.”

“Maybe because he didn’t,” Rhodey finally ground out, unable to stay quiet any longer, annoyance dripping through his words. He figured it was fine, as no one would believe him not having an opinion on any of this. “None of you were ever his ‘support system.’”

“Then who was?” Steve frowned accusingly. “We were his team!”

“For starters,” Rhodey huffed, “Pep, Happy and _me.”_

“You said ‘for starters,’” Nat raised an eyebrow at him, and Rhodey fixed his glare on her, “who else?”

“Contrary to popular belief, you guys aren’t the center of his world.”

“Then who is?” Rogers inquired again, having Rhodey stare at him in cold exasperation. Honestly, his dimwittedness was working in his favor today. His point wasn’t to get them on Stephen’s trail. 

Rhodey didn’t know what to think of the sorcerer quite yet. 

Months of fighting them had proven him to be powerful, and he’d played with Tony countless times, but he’d never quite _hurt_ him. Some bruises left and right, sure, but nothing more than Tony could handle. 

He knew it wasn’t that simple. The sorcerer had stood by while people died, and along with the sorcerers, had been the cause of multiple deaths. 

But Rhodey was military. He didn’t see things quite as black and white as some of the others in the team. He’d known death and destruction on both sides, knew the term ‘friendly fire’ and how sometimes sacrifices had to be made for the greater good. If they wanted to avoid deaths altogether, they would never go to war; they’d focus on defense only and let the enemies overwhelm them and slaughter them one by one. 

They always tried to prevent deaths, tried to train and prepare every recruit as adequately as possible, but all of them knew that not everyone would make it back home—all to prevent a worse fate for the entire nation. Because not standing up to the threat was worse. 

Now Tony and Stephen had explained what the sorcerers were up to, he could see it from their perspective. He’d hoped Stephen to be fully evil, so he could get Tony to see reason and pull him back. 

Over the months that he’d expected Tony to be seeing Stephen, however, he couldn’t deny the positive effect the sorcerer had had on his best friend’s life. Up to the point that when he’d found them earlier, he’d been relieved the sorcerers were doing something he could almost condone. It hadn’t been something he’d wanted to hear or know, would have wished the earth to follow another path completely, but he’d been assured that wasn’t an option at this point.

And he believed in Tony. 

Knew if anyone could stop the worst from happening, it would be him. 

On top of that, he had also found the beginnings of a silver lining to the sorcerers’ attacks. It hadn’t been said, but Rhodey, who was the main link between the Avengers and Washington, had started to hear rumors. 

More and more officials were buckling under the weight of public outcry. 

People wanted protection, wanted accountability. 

He knew the Avengers were reckless more often than not. He’d seen them suit up and head into battle without any strategic foreplay. Eager to save the day without thinking of the consequences of their actions. They always prepared what they were going to do but somehow failed to account for their enemies' possible retaliation. 

Suspicion was starting to rise that said outcry was what the sorcerers truly needed, what the world truly needed. It would push people to be okay with protective measures more easily, even if the changes are drastic and scary, even if some people would argue on it infringing their comfort or privacy.

“You’re not entitled to know, _captain.”_

“Fine,” Rogers grunted, crossing his arms in front of his chest. “Let’s focus on trying to find him first. FRIDAY is restricted to tell us about his whereabouts. Nat can you hack into her?”

“I can try,” she shrugged, but focussed her eyes on Vision once more, “But what about Vision?”

Vision only stared at her, not acknowledging her inquiry at all, so Steve was the one to frown at her and ask the question that had the whole room confused. “What about him?”

“He’s part JARVIS,” Natasha shrugged, “Tony somehow managed to instal JARVIS again, so can’t Vision connect with its data and find Stark for us?”

The question seemed innocent, but Rhodey knew she meant more than just finding him. If Vision really could work as a link between the two, he could very much learn every secret Tony had JARVIS keep for him, every project he was working on and plan for the future. Every conversation could be listened in on. Rhodey fixed his gaze on Vision like everyone else in the room, but instead of doubt or intrigue, it was fear that was keeping him engaged. 

“Actually, miss Romanoff,” Vision spoke up for the first time that evening, voice calm and smooth as usual, “the new JARVIS only has the same voice as the original, but its coding is completely different.”

Natasha and Vision stared at each other for a little while longer, the rest of the room looking on in confusion at the sudden tension between the two. 

“Tony did say he only used the voice,” Steve cut in, voice certain, “he had no reason to lie.”

The ‘at the time’ hung in the air between all of them, and Rhodey had to do his best not to glare in the _Captain_’s direction. Natasha, either unable to read the android or not finding any signs of deception, relaxed her shoulders and turned towards Steve. “I’ll try hacking FRIDAY then.”

The meeting adjourned, and Rhodey allowed his gaze to linger on Vision, everyone too busy leaving the room and continuing their arguments between each other. The android caught his gaze for just a few seconds, and if Rhodey hadn’t known any better he wouldn’t have thought anything of it. 

But he’d known JARVIS, and due to having spent plenty of time in Tony’s lab over the years, he’d come to recognise some typical signs in his coding. JARVIS was JARVIS, the one and only, and Vision either had somehow been fooled by Tony’s lie or he’d just lied _for_ them. With that context in mind, the look in the android’s eyes had said a lot more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know there was no Tony and Stephen in this chapter T_T but it needed to be written to combat my minor writer's block. 
> 
> But don't worry: they'll be back soon! 
> 
> Thanks to everyone following this story and leaving comments <3 it's always a delight to read and makes writing and posting a lot more enjoyable 
> 
> I hope you all have a wonderful year!


	18. distraction

“Tony?”

“Yeah?” Tony glanced up from where he’d been working on his latest invention. He didn’t even bat an eye anymore at the opening of a portal, only leaning up to accept a kiss from Stephen before turning back to his tools. 

Stephen had placed a permanent portal in the sanctum to Tony’s lab, so the sorcerer appearing through one now meant he had probably come straight from Kamar Taj. 

He could hear the bots whirring in excitement as the Cloak in no doubt had moved to play with them. He was glad Dum-E and U were keeping it distracted. Tony figured it had picked up on Stephen’s increased worry and protectiveness of him, because almost every time he saw the Cloak these days, it was wrapping itself tightly around him, barely allowing him space to breathe.

Either that or the fabric actually wanted to strangle him. Tony chose to believe the first. 

It was kind of weird being in the tower, but waiting on a new lab would take time Tony didn’t feel like he had, and with FRIDAY’s very capable lockdown protocols it was almost like the rest of the tower didn’t exist. It felt like a small victory over the Avengers either way; they wouldn’t be able to take _anything _away from him. 

Tony liked being able to stay in the familiar surroundings. He’d always enjoyed the lab at the tower, the technology as advanced as he could make it and the huge windows giving him a gorgeous view over New York. It had never been his favourite city, but he’d grown fonder of it over the years. 

Minus the little hiccup where even the thought of NYC would have sent him spiralling into an anxiety attack. 

Another bonus about staying in his own lab was that Rhodey could easily come visit and communicate with him when needed. He had his best friend keep an eye on the Avengers, and he didn’t even feel bad about it. 

Rhodey was the most capable for the job, as he was both an in - and outsider, and could place things easily into context. He had always been an invaluable piece of the team, as their link to Washington outside of Fury and SHIELD, which meant he was sure to hear the most important details when it came down to it. 

Tony had always admired Rhodey for his ability to stay impartial and objective. It had always been what he’d needed. Most people had followed him without argument from an early age; either wanting money or approval from the Stark prince. It wasn’t like Tony had been open to anyone’s opinion either, but he’d always admired Rhodey’s ability to say no to him. 

The Avengers on their own weren’t really an issue, but it was great to know what information would leave the team and move higher-up and what not. This far it seemed as if they hadn’t yet disclosed that Tony wasn’t part of the team anymore. Tony didn’t mind too much, it allowed him time to regroup and get a head start without having to worry too much about public outrage and speculation. He knew there were rumours, knew people had seen him leave the gala and that he hadn’t been in public since, and he was almost scared to check how accurate they really were. 

“Remember when I trained with Peter?”

“Please tell me he didn’t pick a fight with yet another evil wizard?”

“Sorcerer.” Stephen huffed, but Tony didn’t answer, only smirked down at his hands as he tried to finish his wiring. The knowledge of the world - or at least half of it - possibly ending had been a lot to take in, and definitely hadn’t been good for his already frayed nerves. So he did what he knew best; he built. The movements were familiar if not calming, and his mind, always three steps ahead, screamed for ways to protect the earth as best he could. 

“I think you should, however,” he continued quietly, coming to rest on Tony’s right. 

“Pick a fight with an evil sorcerer? I already did, babe, and though it ended pretty well for me I’m not looking for another fling.”

Stephen growled - in either jealousy or annoyance, and Tony fought back a smile as the sorcerer wrapped possessive arms around his torso from behind. His chest pressed against Tony’s back, and he clamped his teeth around Tony’s earlobe before hissing into his ear. “You better not.” 

The sting of his teeth soothed by the soft lips almost pulled a surprised moan out of him, but he managed to bite his lip and stay quiet.

Tony leaned back against him, reaching his hand up to card it through Stephen’s hair, pressing him closer, the move prompting Stephen to lean down and start pressing kisses against his pulse. 

“I’m working!” He protested as well as he could with his hand still massaging Stephen’s scalp, his eyes falling closed as he got lost in the sensation of Stephen against him. 

The lips trailing over his neck were heaven, sucking in all the right places and sending shivers down his spine. It made him start to pant slightly, forgetting to breathe regularly as all his focus went to the warm bites against his skin. 

It really didn’t take much for Tony to give into Stephen. 

He’d been in blissful concentration, mind focussed solely on his latest task and away from the troubles that ailed him. It had always been his favourite state of being, where nothing mattered except the tools in his hands and the sound of metal against metal. 

Stephen against him was the only feeling that topped that sensation. 

Tony swivelled around on his stool so he could wrap his legs around Stephen’s, the loss of the doctor at his neck soothed by the sight now in front of him. He grinned up at the sorcerer, hands finding a hold at his collar. 

The sunlight shining in from the huge windows basked him in a golden glow, making him look like more of a god than he already did. Tony suddenly felt a wave of longing for his mansion, thinking about living there with Stephen, waking up in the morning to the sound of the ocean and Stephen wrapped around him. He wondered what it would have been like, if they had met earlier. 

Would they have even gotten along? Would Stephen have even bothered chasing after him? Would Tony still have found him as intriguingly alluring had he not been a villain? 

Tony could imagine it, could imagine them in the orange sunrise, lounging in Tony’s old patio chairs together, tangled up in each other as they watched over the golden waves. Would Stephen have still been a surgeon? Would he still have as much time for Tony as he did now? 

He dismissed that line of thinking, blaming his inherent neediness, and filing it away. There was nothing wrong with being happy things turned out the way they had, after all, even if Stephen had suffered, even if because of it, half of the world might end if they didn’t do anything to stop it. 

He winked, Stephen’s eyes dark as they followed Tony’s movements. “You were saying?”

“I think you should train with me,” Tony raised an eyebrow at Stephen, the sorcerer continuing his explanation. Whatever was on his mind was clearly important enough to continue despite the easy distraction of their bodies against each other. Stephen had gotten distracted by less. “You’ve fought magic before, but I can help you learn to cover your blindspots and use the best parts of your suit. I can help you learn how to beat me.” 

“Alright, but why?” 

Stephen’s expression was neutral and collected, eyeing Tony as the earlier arousal faded from his pupils. “Because if in any way we’d need to fight each other again, I wouldn’t want to win.”

Tony’s frown only deepened, gripping onto Stephen’s collar more tightly. Stephen’s smile turned reassuring as he noticed Tony’s distress, and Tony tried to pull comfort from the gesture. He wanted to turn it into a joke, say something about him having already beaten Stephen, on the roof when they’d first committed to each other. But it would only lead to Stephen explaining what he already knew; he meant fight for real, magic and all, fight to _beat him, _maim and kill. 

He understood Stephen’s sentiment, but it was difficult to agree with the plan when he wouldn’t want to win either. Whatever that even meant. He couldn’t imagine a scenario where either one would have to hurt the other, especially after they were finally on the same side, and even if there was a possible future where they would have to, Tony would rather work towards prevention instead of learning to best his boyfriend.

“It’s not just that, don’t worry,” Stephen’s hands moved up to cup Tony’s face and tilt it back up towards his. Tony hadn’t even realised he’d dropped his gaze to the floor. The soft touch and blue eyes settled him, but he felt the relief of a fluttering heart only when Stephen smirked at him. He couldn’t imagine how that look could have ever made him anything other than incredibly turned on. He worshipped it, worshipped the darkness of it that pulled him in, mixed with nothing but wanton eyes and arrogant air. “If I know you can defeat _me,_ you can defeat everyone.”

A snort escaped him and Stephen raised an unamused eyebrow at the sound, fingers digging into Tony’s thighs. “I’m serious.”

“I know you are, sweetheart,” Tony chuckled, pulling him down into a kiss. Stephen was reluctant to give in, but he couldn’t help melt into him in the end, making Tony lick into his mouth approvingly. 

The kiss was almost disgustingly sweet, having Tony’s muscles contract with want, his heart clenched tightly as he held Stephen close. He could hear from the tiny breaths and sounds forced from Stephen’s throat that the sorcerer felt the same. 

“Sir,” JARVIS spoke up from the ceiling. Tony ignored him as Stephen did something exquisite with his tongue, until the words finally filtered through his brain, “Miss Potts is on the line for you.”

Tony pushed Stephen back, the sorcerer looking at him in dismay. Tony knew he’d pay for it later, and he was already looking forward to it, but now he merely turned back around on his stool in excitement. “Pull her through.”

“Pep? Any news?”

“Yes,” his friend’s voice sounded from the speakers, clear and determined. He’d always admired her efficiency and purpose, and much like with Rhodey he wouldn’t know where he’d be without her, “the transfer from Rose Hill high to Midtown has been approved! And May has agreed to let Harley stay with them.”

“Yes!” Tony pumped his fist in victory, already turning back to face Stephen. The sorcerer had his arms crossed in front of his chest, but his earlier disapproval of having been dismissed had faded into a fond smile and a confused pull of his eyebrows. 

“Why not have him stay at the sanctum?” His voice was deep and smooth, sending shivers up Tony’s spine as he tried to fight the sheepish blush creeping up his cheeks. “We have plenty of space.”

“I don’t want there to be a disparity between them.” He huffed quietly, turning away from Stephen’s amused gaze once more and focusing his attention back on Pepper. “Besides, he’s better off with a responsible parental figure around. Anything else, Pep?”

“Yes, Harley’s flight is supposed to land around eight tonight and May and Peter will pick him up.”

“Alright,” Tony smiled at the ceiling even as Pepper wouldn’t be able to see it. He could still feel Stephen behind him, even as they weren’t touching, and it sent a wave of contentment through him. Soon enough everyone he cared about would be in New York, and he would be able to protect them. He’d make sure of it. “Let them know I’ll pick them up after school tomorrow.”

“Sure. Also-“ Pepper faltered, her tone betraying her worry. It was enough to warn Tony of the upcoming subject. “Tony, are you certain you don’t want to acknowledge some of the rumours going around?”

“Nope, thanks, Pep!” Tony quickly ended the call, refusing to put any thought whatsoever towards media quite yet. He didn’t know why, but the thought of the press was enough to make him feel like his chest was constricting. Perhaps because if he saw the news about the gala and conflict between the Avengers, it would make it real. No matter how aware he was of the situation, perhaps it still hadn’t dawned on him completely. Maybe he just wanted to avoid seeing any footage of the video - _snuff film_ \- of his parents, as even a picture of the road would probably fuel his nightmares even more. 

He could feel Stephen eyeing his back, gearing up to question Tony about his avoidance, so before Stephen could even open his mouth to say anything, he had already swivelled around and stood up from his stool. He crowed the sorcerer against a table, watching as Stephen’s protest died in his throat and his Adam’s apple bobbed in approval. Stephen effortlessly jumped onto the table, immediately wrapping his long legs around Tony and pulling him in. 

The sorcerer’s eyes came at the level of his own now, and Tony took the opportunity to lean into him effortlessly, brushing their lips together in a bruising kiss as he bucked his hips forward. He revelled in Stephen’s suprised mewl, the sorcerer already starting to claw at his back and pull at his shirt. 

Stephen was more than a distraction, obviously, but man did Tony like to use him as one. 


	19. liabilities

“Are you sure none of the Avengers know you’re here?”

“I’m positive, Hap,” Tony sighed out for the millionth time trying to soothe his friend. He was used to Happy’s overprotective side, and even though he’d stepped down as his personal bodyguard on the account of him being Iron Man, he still couldn’t quite get over it. He guessed fifteen years of watching over his safety had left behind its marks. Or maybe Happy had always been this annoying. “They’re at the tower, trying to find the locations of my safe houses.”

“I thought you didn’t have any safe houses?”

“Exactly! I’m Tony fucking Stark; I don’t need them.”

“Doesn’t mean they won’t figure that out any time soon! They can have other sources!” Happy argued, glancing at him through the rear-view mirror before looking through the crowd of students starting to stream from the gates. Tony had no doubt that all these poor kids were war criminals in his friend’s mind. He was watching each with the intensity of a lion trying to protect its pride. “I still think the kids are a liability.”

Tony groaned, leaning his head back against his seat. “I’m filtering you out. Is that what you want? Now I’m not listening to you anymore at all.”

“Tony-,“ Happy’s arguments died in his throat as the door to the car opened, and excited shatter filled the space. Tony sat up straight at once, smiling as Peter peaked his head inside.

“Hey Happy! I- whoa Mr. Stark, you’re here!”

Tony rolled his eyes as he fought against the fond smile creeping up his face. Peter’s eyes were huge and excited, and Tony motioned for him to get in. “Of course, I am! I said I’d get you, didn’t I? Now come in before you notify all of New York of my location.”

“Yea- uh of course,” Peter stumbled over his words as he took a seat across from Tony’s, Harley following and sitting next to him.

Tony watched the other teen for a second, looking for any sign that he’d made the wrong call in having Harley come to New York. Perhaps it wasn’t fair to ask a seventeen-year-old to switch schools in his last year of high school, but as often with Tony’s decisions after something big happened, it had been impulsive.

Harley looked calm and happy though, lips pulled into a worried frown the only sign he wasn’t completely at ease at the moment.

“I just - you know - thought you meant pick up as in have Happy come pick us up and -“

“Tony,” Harley interrupted Peter, who sighed in relief as he was stopped from rambling. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, kid,” Tony replied, though his smile wavered slightly at the teen’s worry.

He never wanted them to have to care about his wellbeing, but he couldn’t deny it being incredibly touching. It had been easier in 2010, when it had just been Harley and he’d had so much on his mind that he hadn’t had the mental capacity to worry about the kid. He’d been so young back then - still is, and definitely shouldn’t have had a role in fighting mutant fire ants.

Having the kid placed in danger was his fault, and even if Harley insisted time and time again that it was fate and they were ‘connected’ it didn’t quite help soothe that guilt. He had been happy trying to make up for it with new toys however, trying to give him opportunities and knowledge in return for Tony still being unable to let go of him fully. Even now he’d brought the kid to New York when who-knew-what would be going down soon. With the Avengers in shambles and placing him as a possible target once more.

“I’m perfectly fine.”

No one was supposed to know about the kids. He’d always made sure the Avengers weren’t aware of their existence or their link to Tony, and he was planning to keep it that way.

Harley watched him carefully, and though he didn’t seem fully convinced, he leaned back in his seat and stayed quiet.

“After all,” Tony’s grin returned fully as Happy started the car, “I’m finally able to take you to my lab! You’ll love it.”

“Really?” Peter asked, eyes wide in excitement. Tony could see Harley was just as excited, but was trying to keep it down, biting his lip to hold back a smile. It immediately calmed his earlier doubts and reassured him of his decision. “Can we meet Dum-E?”

“Of course!”

It didn’t take long for them to reach the sanctum, but during that time Peter had somehow managed to fill Tony in completely on all his classes, how his friends were doing, and was now rambling about the upcoming decathlon championships.

It was refreshing, being able to talk to the teens like this. The few times he’d met Peter in New York was when he came to visit Tony on the roof of Stark Tower, and that time was mainly spent talking about his adventures as Spiderman.

“And so now Liz decided to come to the championships anyway, because it’s what her dad would have wanted. She’s so strong!” Peter continued, mouth moving a mile a minute, “When my mom and dad died I – well I was still very young, so I didn’t really have to worry about my future at the time, I guess. She said her mom is thinking about moving them to Oregon though.”

“Wait,” Tony interrupted as the car had stopped and Happy opened the door, “what happened to her dad?”

“He died recently. They suspect due to a heart attack.”

Tony expressed his condolences as he moved out of the car, both teens following him but falling silent as they looked up at the old building in front of them.

“Is this where you’ve been hiding?” Harley asked. He’d been quiet for most of the ride, allowing Peter to ramble as he himself glanced around New York. Peter had directed some questions at him or dragged him along into explaining some of the things they’d done together over the day, and he always answered them without any trouble, but seemed comfortable letting the younger teen steal the spotlight.

“I don’t _hide, _kid,” Tony huffed, waving Happy off as his friend headed back to SI to continue his job as head of security.

“Well what do _you _call it when you don’t tell anyone where you are?”

“I call it ‘chillaxing’ now back off,” Tony fired back without any bite behind it, having Harley smirk at him as Tony lead the way inside.

Peter’s awes filled the income hall as they entered the building, and Tony was glad Stephen had made sure Wong and Mordo were at Kamar Taj. He wasn’t worried about them reacting badly to the kids, but it would make things a lot smoother.

He led the teens to the lab now. Making his way towards the hall leading towards the kitchen, both teens following apprehensively around the unfamiliar space.

Tony glanced back at them to check they weren’t touching anything dangerous. He’d joked about childproofing the sanctum the day before but Mordo hadn’t been amused. Wong at least had the fun observation that of it was save for Tony to live here, the kids should be fine.

Neither was touching anything, though Peter seemed to be forcefully holding himself back from doing so, as they glanced around the old walls and cabinets.

This part of the sanctum was luckily empty of valuable magical items, as the habitable part of the building, and therefore they didn’t really pose a risk unless they went up to the library or artefact room.

The door to the lab was inconspicuous, the same make as the one opening up into the kitchen, but as soon as it was opened it was clear it wasn’t quite natural.

The transition from old wood to modern technology was jarring, and the brain realised the space didn’t quite fit into building, clearly too big for the old brownstone. The view over New York sixty stories up didn’t quite help the process either. 

Tony dismissed their questions for now, eager to start working again, and was glad the teens were easily distracted by the bots whirring towards them.

“Okay, kids,” Tony spoke, getting their attention back on him, “Time to play.”

Tony felt ten years’ worth of stress fall of his shoulders as he worked with the teens. It was wonderful; he was getting so much done with their help, and the kids’ excitement easily rubbed off on him. It was fun to see how his inventions could still be awe-inducing, how it wasn’t just something expected of him and still warranted praise.

It was also satisfying to see how both Peter and Harley were making so much progress since they started working with him. Harley was almost fully proficient in AI’s and was learning Peter to keep his updated. In no time he’d be able to access the full capabilities of his suit. Meanwhile Peter’s skills with robotics were vastly improving, and he was getting more creative with his inventions.

It was exhilarating.

So much so that he almost didn’t notice Stephen slipping into the lab. _Almost. _

He was the first to turn towards the sorcerer with a smile, the teens so wrapped up in playing with Tony’s Itsy Bitsy Spider protocol, which would make Romanoff think she was actually getting into his servers. It had been something he’d started working on as soon as he’d figured out she’d been an agent all those years ago.

Peter was the first of the teens to look up and notice Stephen, and his eyes widened in fascination. “Doctor Strange! What are you doing here?”

He froze, glancing at Tony sheepishly before recanting his words. “I mean I know him from the internet -“

“Save it, Underoos,” Tony rolled his eyes at him, once more fighting against the smile pulling at his lips. It did really scare him sometimes how naive Peter was. Or at least how he so desperately wanted to be the hero and believe the best in people. He had never been like that, too focussed on his own gratification and desperation for attention, and as soon as he’d turned to doing the right thing it had come with doubts and pain. 

He’d learned quickly enough that humanity can be vile.

Peter’s ears went red, huffing as he looked back down at his screen. “You said you wouldn’t tell.”

“Actually, I did specifically tell you I would.”

Tony gave Peter a break and focussed his attention on Harley instead. The teen was looking up at Stephen, confusion and suspicion taking over his features. “What _is _he doing here though? Are you working with the sorcerers?”

Tony took a second to think over his words. He wanted them to understand, to stand behind him - and hopefully in the end also behind Stephen -, but he didn’t want to tell them about the possible end of the world. It was almost too much for _him _to handle and putting that same burden on a couple of teens was a no-go.

He wanted them to have fun and be kids.

“More like working towards the same goal.” Tony started hesitantly.

Harley had fixed his eyes on him now instead of Stephen, and Tony almost felt ridiculous for twitching under his gaze. He glanced at Stephen, finding the sorcerer looking at him in reassurance, before turning back towards Harley.

“Look, it’s complicated,” Tony continued, more firm this time, “but can you trust me when I say it’s what the world needs?”

Harley was still watching him, Peter glancing between both of them nervously, but then he nodded. “Okay.”

That simple word of affirmation eased his shoulders, the tension slowly leaving the room as Harley continued working with Peter. Tony still watched him for any signs of anger as he moved closer to Stephen, but the teen seemed to have focused back completely on his task.

“Well that went about as well as expected,” Tony whispered, fighting against the urge to lean closer into Stephen’s space. They were standing a little less than a respectable distance apart already, but in a way, it was even more tantalizing.

“They care about you,” Stephen shrugged, voice calm and smooth as he too watched the teens.

He was so grateful for Stephen. 

Stephen who seemed to fit into his life so effortlessly, who could read him so smoothly and knew exactly what he wanted or needed. The sorcerer who placed him above everything else in the world.

To have someone who knew about him and his ego, who instead of assuming Tony thought of himself as above all else, as the most important person in the world, understood the opposite to be true.

And instead of merely praising him for his humility, fought to prove him wrong. To prove that he _was _in fact more important than all else. Tony didn’t quite care about being the best or even leaving a legacy. He wasn’t like his dad in that aspect.

As long as he was Stephen’s most loved, as long as he had the people he cared for around him and safe, everything else wouldn’t matter. 

Yet it was still different. Wasn’t like fighting for Howard’s pride or Steve’s approval.

Because Stephen never made him. 

Tony never felt unheard around him, and Stephen, though not the best with words, always made sure he felt appreciated, loved, wanted. With his soft lingering touches and eyes that followed him around the room. With the way he showed his own vulnerabilities, showing that the relationship wasn’t just one-sided. That they were both people that brought their own issues to the table but considered each other important enough to work through it.

“I-,” Tony started to say something but was interrupted by Peter yelling out at them in a hesitant voice. He had stood up from his seat and started twiddling with the strigs of his sweatshirt.

“Doctor Strange?”

Stephen raised an expectant eyebrow at the teen, though he couldn’t hide his slight surprise from Tony.

“Can we maybe train some more? I really learned a lot last time and -,”

“Wait,” Stephen interrupted him with a frown, but the teasing glint in his eye was clear as day. Tony was very familiar with it by now. “you’re Spider-Man?”

Tony rolled his eyes and pushed Stephen’s shoulder, but he had to admit it was funny to watch Peter’s eyes go wide, gaping between Tony and Stephen.

_“He didn’t know_?”

Peter’s voice was small but frustrated, but Stephen smirked and eased his exasperation. His voice was low and smooth again when he continued, all teasing having faded away. “I’m joking. I’m ready now if you want.”

“Really?” Peter’s expressive eyes were hopeful, blinking over towards Tony and how could he say no to that?

“Fine,” Tony rolled his eyes, and glanced over at Stephen who was watching him with an amused expression. “But be careful.”

Stephen nodded in agreement and motioned for Peter to follow him. Tony’s eyes followed their movements out of the lab, Peter trailing after Stephen, almost bouncing in excitement.

Once they were gone, Tony turned back around. Harley was still sitting in front of the computer screen, eyes fixed on the keyboard. He sighed as he moved to take Peter’s empty seat, watching the teen until he looked back up at Tony. 

“You okay, kid?”

He was quiet for a while, seemingly collecting his thoughts, but eventually he spoke, words careful; “I’m not sure.”

Harley had changed a lot over the last couple of years, had learned to be careful about some topics, and grown more considerate of Tony’s triggers and limits, but one thing had always remained; he was never shy with his words around Tony. Seeing him so cautious made his stomach twist.

Placing a hand on Harley’s shoulder now, he hoped it came of as comforting, or in some way reassuring that he hadn’t changed. At least not drastically.

“Look,” he started, Harley still looking at him, “I know it’s confusing; and honestly I’m not sure either.”

He paused for a second, seeing if Harley would intervene or comment. Harley didn’t, but his expression became more thoughtful.

“But I know that I’ll probably always have doubts. So, I figured, why not have doubts while spending time with the people I care about.” 

Harley shrugged as if to say he had a point, but his words were still unsure. “Alright. And you care about him?”

“I do,” he replied hesitantly, but his answer seemed to soothe the teen, so he repeated with more certainty. “I really do.”

Harley, apparently sated by that confession, turned back towards his screen and started typing again. Meanwhile, Tony’s doubt acted up once more, and he couldn’t help but ask for reassurance. “You don’t mind I dragged you out to New York?”

“Well, sharing a room with Peter is not ideal. He just won’t stop talking,” Harley whined, but Tony knew he was joking, and it definitely helped ease his fears. “But aunt May is really kind, and Midtown is so much nicer than my old school.”

“Really?” Tony smiled, faking surprise, “but Rose Hill was so … charming.”

Harley rolled his eyes at him, and Tony could feel a huge weight lift off his shoulders. 

Whatever else would have to happen, he still had the people he cared about behind him, and that was all that really mattered. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is extremely slow-moving but plot is coming I promise!


	20. chorus

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I changed the title. Why? Because I couldn't take the old name serious and cringed every time I had to use it
> 
> happy reading!

Tony stopped in the entrance to the living room, leaning against the doorframe as he crossed his arms. Stephen was lounging on one of the couches, long limbs sprawled over the back and armrests. His attention was fixed on the ceiling, eyes annoyed as he listened to Mordo complain.

From what Tony could follow, the other sorcerer was making a comment about Stephen’s bratty attitude, which, you know, _fair_. Stephen merely rolled his eyes, leaning further against the leather of the couch as he started trailing his hands elegantly through the air to accentuate his words.

Wong was sitting at the table, barely paying their bantering any attention as his focus remained on his books, throwing in a cutting comment here or there. Today they seemed mostly aimed towards Stephen, Tony’s boyfriend ignoring any and all negativity and continuing with his own conversation.

It wasn’t unusual to find the three of them hanging out in the same space, but this far they’d almost always been working or studying. To see them all hanging out in their spare time was a first, mostly because from what Tony had gathered, studying was their spare time. It’s something Tony really enjoyed about the sorcerers; they were interested in what they were doing and truly enjoyed learning.

The Avengers had always bugged him into taking a break from his work, to relax with them every once in a while. And though he could recognise their good intentions, it was annoying still how they didn’t seem to get that working in his lab was his relaxation. That just because to them it felt like it was Tony’s obligation, it didn’t mean Tony thought of it the same way.

“Stephen,” Tony stepped forward, sauntering over towards his boyfriend. Stephen’s eyes immediately moved towards him as he fell silent. “Get off your perky little ass and put on some workout clothes.”

“Oh, darling, you have such a way with words,” Stephen teased, having Tony smile as he leaned down to press a lingering kiss against his lips.

When Tony leaned back up, Stephen followed, chasing his lips, but instead of continuing their kiss, he let his mouth pull into a grin as he did as told. The move had left him in a sitting position, and he pushed Tony away, standing up in one elegant movement. With a snap and push of his fingers, he had changed, eyeing Tony with a smirk on his face. “Waiting on you now.”

Tony could feel his eyes already darkening, focused on the man in front of him. He’d never seen Stephen in his workout clothes before. Sweatpants and T-shirt’s (mostly his own), suits and robes, but this was a whole new treat.

The outfit was clearly in the same style as the robes, but the cut and fit were more favourable for strenuous movements, arms free of fabric exposing his thin but sculpted muscles. His top didn’t come as low as with his usual outfit, showing him that his assumption of the robes being unfavourable for his ass was truly misguided.

If Tony didn’t have this much composure, he’d surely be salivating all over the floor.

“Get out. Both of you,” Mordo groaned from his seat, hand rubbing at his temples. Tony’s grin was directed at Stephen, who only tsk-ed at his friend before pulling Tony into an extra languid kiss.

It felt petty, stupid and dumb, but he couldn’t help melting into it. Satisfaction coursed through him when Mordo only groaned louder.

“Enough,” Tony pulled back as he rolled his eyes, controlling his breathing. “Let’s go.”

Stephen shrugged as if to say ‘your loss’, before letting go of Tony and heading towards the exit.

To his surprise, Stephen opened a portal as soon as they were in the hallway, and Tony stepped up to it without hesitation, standing next to Stephen as he looked up at his boyfriend. “There’s a gym a little down the street, you know.”

Stephen rolled his eyes, pushing lightly at Tony’s back. “We’re training with _magic_, Tony. Safest place for that is Kamar Taj.”

It was strange stepping through the portal and being in a completely different time zone. He usually stayed within New York, more accurately the sanctum and Tower, so taking a portal to a completely new place was disorienting. It was already dark outside in Nepal, but there were still some sorcerers milling around. Tony eyed them warily, but Stephen paid them no mind, simply started moving down the hall. Tony could only follow as he tried not to get distracted by the new environment.

They ended up in a courtyard, Stephen slowing down before he turned back to face Tony. Without much ado he shrugged, spreading his arms wide. “Alright, attack me.”

Tony frowned at him in exasparation, smile tugging at his lips. “Just attack you? I thought you were going to _teach _me stuff, dojo master.”

“Not a dojo,” Stephen rolled his eyes, eliciting a smirk from Tony. “And you already know how to fight; I’ll just point out what you can do better.”

“Fine,” Tony huffed as he glanced around the dark courtyard, only lit up by a few lanterns hanging from the edge of the building. “But, darling, as much as I love hearing your grunts and pants, I’m thinking we need some music. JARVIS? Something upbeat please.”

By a small miracle, JARVIS found qspeakers to connect to, and a second later music was blasting through the yard. Tony wondered if the noise would bother the habitants of the temple, but Stephen didn’t say anything of it, so he figured it was fine.

Stephen smirked at him as he took a few steps back. Tony’s eyes followed his movements, tapping the arc reactor chest plate to let Bleeding Edge crawl over him.

There were no words after that. Tony fired the first blast per Stephen’s request, and their fight continued from there. The spells Stephen aimed at him were seemingly harmless. Every time one made it past his defence it made a dinging sound against his suit but faded away painlessly.

Tony had thought he knew what fighting Stephen was like, but where the sorcerer would usually stick close to him and worm himself around his body, attacks close range, he stayed far away now. He used the cloak to float away from him whenever Tony tried to get close, continuing his attack from a distance.

In a way it was even more frustrating, as Tony’s body craved the attention, annoyed that the sorcerer stayed so far out of his reach. Yet he wanted to focus, wanted to show that he wasn’t useless against magic, and forced his mind to stay on the task at hand.

It seemed harder fighting from afar.

He figured out why, quickly enough; it gave Stephen more room and time to work on his spells, hands moving in more complicated designs. Tony retaliated by using his own long-range weapons, but Stephen was quick, blocking the blasts each time and Tony was too afraid of hurting him to hope for anything less.

There were plenty of weapons in his suit to end this fight quickly, but it would be too destructive, and final. The point was to train his combat skills, without immediately dropping the atomic bombs. But on the other hand, there wasn’t much he could do against literal magic. No roundhouse kick would suffice against a sorcerer who could simply fly out of his reach or drop through a portal.

But Stephen gave him some tips, and they tried again, and it didn’t improve much, but at least less spells were hitting their target.

It was two hours later when Stephen finally called an end to their little ‘sparring session’ and Tony panted slightly as he let his suit bleed away.

Tony was glad to see the sorcerer immediately coming closer to him, creating a small portal and handing him some water. He drank it as directed, keeping his eyes on Stephen’s neck as he downed a bottle of his own. Stephen was watching him in turn, almost calculating, worried. Tony couldn’t quite place it, and it bugged him, wondering what he could possibly have on his mind that had him so hesitant. 

“What?”

“Now there’s this thing between us,” he started, unsure, after a few seconds, keeping careful eyes on Tony’s face, “I think it’s only fair I update you on what’s been going on with Wanda.”

Tony chuckled, choosing the focus on the first part of that sentence as he took a step closer to the sorcerer. “Really, Stephen? You’re still calling this a _thing_?”

Stephen looked at him in apprehension, before sighing, stepping closer to Tony and wrapping his arms around him. They were both sweaty and smelly, but Tony didn’t mind, only smiling up at the sorcerer. From close by he could easily see the red dusting the sorcerer’s cheekbones after their earlier exhaustion, and Tony could swear it brought out the colour of his eyes even more. “What would you like to call it then? Clandestine hook-up Premium?”

“I don’t know, _doc_, how about relationship to start?” Stephen rolled his eyes and was about to say something, but Tony shut him up, pressing his lips against Stephen’s just long enough to startle him into silence before he was leaning back again.

“Now what were you saying about Wanda?”

“She’s soon to be released from her training quarters.”

“You mean the dungeons?”

“Same difference,” Stephen waved off.

“What does that mean? She’s free again?” Tony couldn’t help the discomfort spreading through him, the fear at the possibility of seeing the witch again, now stronger than ever, apparently. He’d been so wrapped up in Stephen that he hadn’t thought about the witch and her presence in the ancient temple, but now the thought was in his mind he couldn’t help feel like the witch was going to jump out at him any second, mess with his mind again or just outright murder him.

“She passed the evaluation I mentioned. She has much improved and surrendered completely to the order.” Stephen was watching him, but Tony looked away, frown fixed over his eyes as he stared at the tiles on the floor. “She will still not be allowed to leave Kamar Taj just yet, but she’ll join regular apprenticeship training.”

“Order? Really?” Tony tried to joke, but he knew it was shallow.

“Tony-,” Stephen started, voice soft and pleading, but Tony stepped away, needing more air to breathe.

“No, no, I’m fine-,” he countered, and after a second of thought, started pacing up and down the stretch of room. He wasn’t particularly fond of the thought of anyone being locked in a dungeon, and he didn’t quite hate Maximoff enough to be upset about her progress, but it was a strange feeling, nonetheless.

Even today they were in the same building. For now, still locked up, but in a few days free to roam around.

He knew she would still remain in Kamar Taj, and Tony would return to New York, but somehow it still felt too close. Like every step she took to improvement brought her closer to him.

To her revenge on him.

Not that he wasn’t quite sure he deserved it. Especially after abandoning the Avengers.

Stephen opened his mouth to say something, but was cut short by Mordo calling out to them. Both him and Wong were standing in the entrance to the courtyard, motioning at them to join them. “There’s a meeting about to start.”

“I didn’t know of this,” Stephen frowned, glancing at Tony, but he stepped closer either way.

“I should come, right?” Tony asked hesitantly, moving to follow him. Stephen seemed surprised by the question, stopping in his tracks to glance between Tony and his friends. “I mean I’m with you now, aren’t I?”

——

“This attack in Brussels should lure out the Avengers, which will be the last straw public outrage needs to set up restrictions on them. It will also show that Iron Man is not with them, which should dehumanise them even more.”

Mordo’s voice was calm, edging on routine, even as he continued, making Tony’s blood run cold. He seemed to be the only one in the room however, the rest simply following with a bored gaze or nodding along. “There will be five casualties that are unavoidable. The Ancient One has calculated these five to be enough to make it worth people’s attention and be the most beneficial for the future.”

Even as he tried to focus on the technical, on Mordo continuing his explanation, on anything else, he couldn’t stop seeing the faces projected on the screen. There were five pictures, all in all not too bad, but Tony couldn’t stop seeing the one picture from the left.

It depicted a young girl, around four or five, with curly brown hair and blue eyes. The picture had a name underneath it. _Sophia._

On the left, there was another picture showing a woman who looked very much like the little girl, probably either her mother or older sister. Tony secretly hoped it was the first, didn’t want her poor parents losing two children. 

He stayed quiet though, sinking into his seat as the sorcerers around him were watching bald leader lady - he still refused to refer to her as ‘The Ancient One’ - as she stepped up next to reiterate the importance and following steps. His lip was starting to bleed with how much he was biting into it, trying to stay still.

He wanted to object, wanted to call bullshit and somehow get them to stop what they were doing. But he had chosen this. He had chosen to stand behind them. He knew what the consequences were if they didn’t. Stephen had told them about the threat they were trying to avoid. The threat he had seen coming for months if not years.

It was what’s necessary. But a part of his brain screamed at him to find another solution. That there was a way to stop those people from being killed without fucking over everyone’s future.

He could feel Stephen’s eyes on him, but he avoided his gaze, still glaring at the screen instead.

As soon as the meeting was adjourned, he got up from his seat and moved towards the door, walking through the hallway with purpose as he felt a familiar anger coursing through him.

“Tony!” Stephen was following him, voice careful but edging on a warning.

“Make a portal.”

Stephen stayed quiet but complied, Tony barging straight through it into their income hall. A hand pulled at his arm, begging him to stop as the portal disappeared behind them.

“Tony! Please, I know you-,”

“No!” Tony was yelling now, turning around to face Stephen as he couldn’t help letting the anger spill over. “I know I don’t have a right to be mad right now, but I _hate this. _I hate being responsible for their deaths!”

“You aren’t responsible,” Stephen countered, on the edge of raising his voice. He was clearly trying to stay calm and certain, trying to soothe Tony, but his own frustration was starting to bleed through, starting to sound like his old teachers trying to explain why he had to ‘show his work’ on a maths test, irritated and determined. “The _universe _is. You have no say in this nor are you able to prevent it from happening. I won’t let you.”

“Then let Thanos come! We’ll find another way; there’s _always _another way!”

“No,” Stephen’s eyes had gone cold, voice hard and stern, leaving no room for argument. “I will not risk _the only _thing I care about because you don’t believe the end justifies the means.”

“I just wish I didn’t know. I _knew _I couldn’t save everyone, but I wish I didn’t _know!_” He knew his anger was now edging on bitterness, the distaste in his mouth and spirals of doubt in his head. Would he have made the same choice if not blinded by his love for Stephen? Were all of these deaths caused by his selfishness?

He deflated, anger settling down as he let his exhaustion take over, his defeat filtering into his words as he spoke. “I wish I hadn’t known about any of this.”

Stephen’s cold eyes flashed for barely a second, yet it was enough for Tony to detect the hurt in them. The sorcerer took a step back from him, and Tony tried not to pay attention to the movement, tried to ignore the sinking feeling in his stomach. Was there a dark version of butterflies?

“Wish you hadn’t known _me?_”

“I-…,” 

He was looking for something to say, but his mind was blank, anger draining from him as exhaustion took its place

“I can’t do this right now,” Tony sighed, hating himself even more. He didn’t look at Stephen, couldn’t watch his reaction. His regrets were selfish and completely unfair, but he couldn’t help feeling them.

He gave Stephen a second to say something, but the sorcerer didn’t, still watching him with that cold gaze of his. Tony couldn’t stand it anymore, but he also didn’t have any answers, didn’t have anything to make it better, so instead he left him alone in the cold income hall.


	21. promise

He regretted what he’d said - or hadn’t said - as soon as the door to the lab had closed behind him, but his mind couldn’t let him care about turning around and making it right. Not before he did what he’d come to the lab for. He needed to work it off, wouldn’t be fair to Stephen to grovel for forgiveness now if he wasn’t completely sure, if his conscience didn’t completely allow it. He needed to find something first, something to fix it, to make it better, to make sure whatever sacrifices would be made would be worth it.

“JARVIS,” he sighed as he ran a hand over his face, stepping away from the door and deeper into the lab as he went to stand behind his favorite worktable, “Open the unnamed project file please.”

He’d chosen to know. Had chosen Stephen, but he hadn’t quite been aware just how many they wouldn’t be able to save. Apparently, he’d been under the impression that joining the sorcerer would give him some control, would give him a way to stop them and lessen the casualties. But as it turned out even as he’d convinced them to not kill anyone unnecessarily, the amount of people that still needed to die was substantial, and too much for Tony to handle.

All he could do now was make their deaths worth it. Was make sure Thanos would never happen, that he’d protect the earth.

His dad had told him he had the key to the future - _was _the key to the future. He’d long given up on trying to make Howard proud of him, but he hoped now the man had spoken the truth. That he really would be the person that would make sure the earth could move forward, that he could help give it the time it needed to grow and expand, the make it a better place for everyone.

That he could stop half the world from being wiped out.

While he worked, his mind wandered back to Stephen and their fight. Working always helped clear his mind, and though some part of him was still angry, he recognised he’d been unfair to Stephen. The sorcerer had been in his line of fire, but he hadn’t been upset with him. He’d been upset with the world, and the feeling of powerlessness coursing through his veins.

Of course, he didn’t regret meeting Stephen. Right? Right.

It wasn’t even a question. He should have objected as soon as Stephen had brought up the notion. But wasn’t that exactly what he’d meant? He’d wished he hadn’t known, and he only knew because of Stephen, because he couldn’t help giving into him.

When Tony finally emerged from the lab, he was feeling a little more satisfied. His project from the last few days was finally getting somewhere. JARVIS was running test protocols and starting assembly on the first prototype. It only softened the pain a little bit.

He’d expected to find the sorcerer in the library or kitchen, hoped to bribe him with some tea and affection into forgiving him. Wanted to assure him that he would never regret meeting him or being with him and would choose him time and time again.

What he got instead, was an empty building.

He didn’t even have to do a tour of the rooms to see if Stephen was hiding somewhere; the aura of the sanctum felt off. Tony could barely even belief his own thoughts; him talking about aura’s and energies in the air, but it was true.

Whenever Stephen was present, it would be warm and comfortable, reflecting the emotions of its master, but now it felt empty and cold. Even worse, the aura felt almost broken, ripping through the air in the hall. Tony entertained the idea that maybe Stephen was home after all, just feeling terrible, but that thought was quickly replaced as he stepped into the entrance hall.

There were clear signs of a battle, and Tony’s heart started racing as he climbed the stairs two steps at a time into the artefact room. He wasn’t allowed in there on his own - fair - but he knew those glass cases used to be not-broken.

Also, he was pretty sure that was a body.

It wasn’t long before panic started overtaking him. He’d been locked in the lab for over twenty hours, so there was no telling how much time had passed since Stephen and the sorcerers had left. He hoped they’d left of their own accord at least, but there was no telling that for sure either, there were clear signs of a fight, not who would have won it.

“JARVIS? FRIDAY?” he asked, voice wavering as he spoke into his com. “Bench EDITH for now. I need all your attention on tracking down Stephen.”

^^^^^^^^

The last 24 hours hadn’t been Stephen’s favourite. In fact, the only day that probably topped it on the list of very bad days was his accident. It had started with his fight with Tony, but he hadn’t even had much time to wallow in self-hatred before Kaecilius had attacked, which of course had led to the death of the Ancient One. And now Dormammu was rising.

Just when they’d thought they were getting somewhere in their mission, getting the earth on its right track, something happened that might be the end of the universe after all. He wondered slightly if she’d anticipated it. She’d always been a step ahead, always knew exactly what needed to be done, had used the time stone to puzzle out their path a million times. She must have seen it happen.

Yet where had it brought her? She was dead, and Hong Kong was already falling apart, the dark dimension ripping apart reality as they knew it, starting from the sanctum.

Tony crossed his mind as it so often did, barely able to go a minute without thinking about the man, hopefully still locked away in his lab. It might not matter soon anymore, either way. Dormammu would be unstoppable, and everything they’d built would be lost.

It wasn’t ideal, but he had to. He was the only one able to control the time stone, the only one able to do this. For the universe, for Tony.

Hating himself as he rose up into the sky, he flew towards the dark dimension. He hoped Tony would forgive him, would get over him soon. Now he had seen how horrible their actions truly were, he probably would already be, might have already been planning on leaving him anyway. He wouldn’t miss Stephen, but he would be safe. And that’s all that mattered to him.

He flew towards the dark Dimension and forced all thought of Tony out of his mind.

^^^^^^^^^^

Tony landed in Hong Kong next to Wong and Karl. They glanced over towards him, but their eyes were fixed on something in the sky. It wasn’t hard for him to find what they were looking for. Everything was still, frozen in place, the building - Hong Kong Sanctum, Tony presumed by the looks of it - frozen even in the middle of collapse. The people around them were just as stiff, the world having been paused in the middle. Tony wondered how far the spell worked, what its reach was, but he only felt lucky that whatever magical war was going on had been enough to stand out on an energy reading. 

The only thing that was moving besides the people on the ground - Mordo and Wong in front of him and some weird looking fellows who Tony could only assume were the bad guys standing opposite them - was a red streak in the sky, moving in a straight, determined line towards the center of the chaos. It took him a second to recognize it as Stephen and his stomach dropped as soon as he did, his heart sinking in despair.

“Stephen!” Tony yelled, taking a step forward as he was about to fly after him, but Wong grabbed his arm, the only reason he didn’t shrug him off being the spell that linked him to the ground.

He gritted his teeth, glaring at Wong as his heart jumped anxiously, mixing with anger. “What is he doing? I have to stop him!”

Wong didn’t answer, keeping his eyes fixed on the hole in the sky. Tony followed his gaze and tried to struggle, but he could only watch him disappear into the darkness. He felt his heart lurch painfully, knot forming in his throat as he felt panic coursing through him. It was too similar, too painful, memories from the past mixing with visions of the present, combining with the loss of Stephen numbing his heart. He was coming back. There was no way Stephen was gone. He knew all about disappearing into darkness, it wasn’t a one-way trip. It couldn’t be.

“He joined the dark dimension,” Mordo drawled out, voice disgusted and betrayed, as the guys with the messed-up eyes started chuckling.

“Even the doctor has given in to the pull of Dormammu.”

Tony wanted to protest, debunk such horrid claims. Stephen would never join… whatever dormammu was. But he felt too numb, too cold, too alone. Stephen was still gone. The portal in the sky started closing up, but Tony barely saw it, barely noticed he was able to move again as Wong’s hand fell from his arm. The librarian was the only one still looking up, keeping his eyes fixed on the colors swirling back into themselves.

“Tony-,” the voice sound soft and broken, almost disbelieving. Tony barely recognized it, didn’t dare hope it to be true as he turned around. Stephen’s feet just touched down on the ground when Tony’s eyes met his, and his heart jumped up into his throat as he stared at the sorcerer in front of him.

He wanted to run over towards him, to make sure it was really him, but after assessing Tony was in fact here Stephen’s eyes moved to the zealots as he spoke. “I’ve made a bargain. Your wishes will come true; immortality as part of the one. You will not enjoy it.”

Tony watched horrified as the men started crying out in pain, skin almost burning from the inside out as they were lifted up towards the hole in the sky right as it was closing up, the sanctum fixing itself right after.

His eyes found Stephen again barely a second later, uncertainty coursing through him as the weight of their fight from yesterday returned. Stephen was watching him as well now, his own insecurity clear. It seemed to be eating away at him, and Tony wanted it to be over. The distance between them seemed too vast, a lot bigger than even when Stephen had gone into the dark dimension. Tony hated it; he wanted them to go back to the ways they were, everything else be damned.

“Stephen,” he breathed out, dropping bleeding edge as he finally stepped forward, about to throw his arms around the sorcerer’s neck. Before he could, however, Stephen took a step back, turning away from him and focusing on Wong. “The Ancient One is dead. We have to continue without her.”

Tony retreated as he watched Stephen, once again having widened the distance between them. Crossing his arms against his chest, he took a step back himself, allowing the sorcerers to discuss the matter between themselves. Now he had pushed Stephen out of his head for a bit he could recognize the complications concerning the Ancient One’s death. He only hoped that was the only reason he had rejected Tony.

“She was a liar,” Mordo cut in, disgust clear in his voice, “how do we know what she told us wasn’t a lie either? She was pulling power from Dormammu after all.”

“She wasn’t a liar,” Stephen glared back, “and I saw what would happen. She showed me even before all of this. We need to continue.”

Wong looked around them, indicating the people starting to wake around them, going on with their day as some of them started throwing them weird glances. “We can discuss this back at the sanctum.”

“Fine,” Stephen sighed, turning around to create the portal. He went through first, followed by Wong and Mordo, and Tony tried to fight against the dread forming in his chest as the portal closed behind him.

They headed into the parlour, and Tony followed only because he didn’t know what else to do. He stayed quiet however, letting the sorcerers discuss whatever they needed as he tried to follow along from his seat on the couch. It was difficult though. His mind kept drifting back towards Stephen, now in a heated debate with Mordo, and tried to shake off the anxiety and loneliness still enflaming his skin.

Yet the sorcerers were running in circles around each other, without getting closer to an answer. He’d always been bad at staying quiet when in a bad mood.

“The Ancient One couldn’t have been the only one able to use the stone or whatever, so just find someone else who can replace her.” He couldn’t keep the annoyance out of his tone, making Wong and Mordo look at him with raised eyebrows before glancing at each other. He didn’t care. He was used to disharmonious teams.

“So be it,” Mordo hissed, but he was glaring at Stephen instead of Tony. “But keep in mind that she could have been steering the earth towards destruction instead of wanting to save it.”

“Which will be easily verified once we check the timeline for ourselves.” Stephen replied for the millionth time, squaring off with Mordo before the other sorcerer finally gave in, sighing and rolling his eyes before storming out of the room. Wong watched Stephen tentatively before giving the both of them a small nod and undoubtedly heading towards the library. 

Once both were gone, Stephen finally turned towards Tony, and Tony could feel some of the weight lift off his shoulders. The sorcerer watched him tentatively, hesitation clear in his movements. Tony stared back in defiance, before he remembered he was in fact the one who needed to apologize.

He had no right to blame him for staying angry despite all of this. He still had no idea what had happened in the 24 hours he had missed, and only now was the exhaustion and grief starting to show on Stephen’s face.

“Look, I’m sorry,” Tony sighed, running a hand over his face as he realized he hadn’t slept either. “Of course, I don’t regret meeting you.”

“Tony, I don’t want you to agree to this only because you think you almost lost me,” Stephen started carefully, his voice a lot softer than he would have expected. Yet there was still a stern edge underneath it, the hints of desperation and determination coursing through his tone. “The only reason you joined us in the first place is because of the Avengers.”

“No,” Tony frowned in incredulity, “I joined you because I love you.”

Stephen stared at him as if at a loss for words, dumbfounded as he blinked in confusion, eyebrows knitted together. It would be cute if it wasn’t so heartbreaking.

“Stephen,” Tony spluttered, leaning back against the couch as he looked up at the doctor. Stephen was looking back at him in doubt, and Tony had to fight not to roll his eyes in exasperation. “Please tell me you knew that.”

“Then promise me,” Stephen took a step closer towards him, almost begging as he woke up from the daze he’d been in as despair took its place. “Promise, you won’t do anything to stop it. It has to happen. Promise me or I’ll walk away. I can’t -,” he cleared his throat, it sounded almost painful as he followed it up with a swallow, looking away from him as if the sight of him was too much. Tony’s heart broke at his words, itching to hold the sorcerer close. “Just promise me.”

“I promise,” Tony whispered, voice hoarse as he stared at Stephen. He couldn’t not. He needed him, needed him more than air to breathe.

He looked so broken then, so small despite being taller than him, and he sighed, shoulders falling in relief as the fight faded out of him. Stephen allowed Tony to pull him in his lap, the sorcerer going limp against him. Stephen’s head immediately turned into his neck, air tickling his skin as he let out a breath. Tony held onto him, glad that he still could, that the sorcerer was safe with him.

“Hey,” he whispered, moving his hand to cup Stephen’s cheek and pull him out of his neck. Stephen looked at him, eyebrows knitted together as he still stared at Tony in doubt. It was only natural to pull him closer, just noticing Stephen blink before their lips met. Stephen reciprocated enthusiastically, kiss quickly turning heated as he held on as if Tony was going to disappear any second, like they only had a moment.

It was with difficulty that Tony pulled away, but he had to, had to look Stephen in the eyes and make sure he knew. “I love you.”

He sat back while Stephen stared at him, smile pulling at his lip as he watched the sorcerer. Dread for the future still lay dormant inside of him, but for now all that mattered was Stephen sitting in his lap.

When it was clear Stephen was still frozen, he inched forward again, missing the sorcerer’s lips against his. It was what the sorcerer had needed to start moving again, gladly attacked his mouth once more, pressing deeper into him. Tony let himself be pushed onto his back, laying down on the couch as Stephen fell on top of him.

He moved his hand down, trailing his fingers over his chest as his other hand pressed at his neck, keeping him locked against him. When Stephen hissed in pain, however, he pulled back as if burned. “You’re hurt?”

“Just a minor stab wound.” Stephen growled impatiently, moving his attention to Tony’s neck now Tony was going to use his mouth for talking. Tony wanted to object, wanted to get the full story out of Stephen and make sure he wasn’t wounded anywhere else, but Stephen’s tongue on his neck felt too nice, and he couldn’t help but melt into the feeling, all thoughts banished from his mind. 


	22. crossed lines

“I think it’s time to give up, Steve.”

He looked up from staring at the map, something he’d been doing obsessively over the last few days. The lights were out, but it didn’t matter now as the morning sun was fixed right on the table in front of him. It only showed New York. Nat could appreciate starting small before focusing on the big picture, but there was no telling if Tony was even still in the states.

For as long as she’d known him, she knew he often opted against staying in America when running away from his problems. She remembered Monaco not so fondly and recalled something about a mansion in Dubai. It had been her job to know only a handful of years ago, but now it seemed like he was a complete stranger.

“How can you say that?” Steve asked in incredulity, voice almost angry that she’d even suggested the possibility. It was easy to understand his need to hold on, to keep searching. He himself had been lost before. But he had wanted to be found. “He has to come back at some point.”

“Why?” She shrugged, sauntering over and taking a chair across from him. “He might forgive you for this, but he will never trust you again. Will never stand behind your judgment in the field.”

“He has to!” Steve started as he had done about a million times now, faith in the truth of his words never wavering. “If he wants to be a part of the Avengers, he-.”

“And what if he doesn’t?” Natasha countered. It had been on her mind a while now, had been looking for the right moment to bring the notion to the captain. Tony had been slipping away for months, and they had been fools not to see it. Everyone else on the team seemed to have already come to the same conclusion; “He doesn’t need us, Steve; we’ve needed him.”

He looked confused by that statement, forehead furrowed and fingers pinching his chin. He stuttered a few times before finding the words he needed. Natasha braced herself for the denial, the avoidance, his thick-headedness refusing to think rationally about the situation.

“He might not need to be part of the Avengers,” Steve started instead, tone calmer and more calculated than she would have expected from him. Though the captain was often so determined about his beliefs, it was only seldom that it wasn’t anything but hopeful delusion. “But he _wants_ to be.”

It was something she had found herself liking about Steve, when they had first met. The thought that everything would play out in the end if only they believed hard enough. She had believed once too, but it had quickly been stamped out of her during her youth. She was reminded of it now, to the point she would have missed the last part of his sentence if it hadn’t been for her training.

Natasha sighed, leaning back in her chair. She was aware. It would be a lie to say she hadn’t been using that exact fact to manipulate Tony into doing whatever she needed of him. She knew it hadn’t been fair, but she had told herself it had been for the greater good.

They needed him and all he had to offer, so if that meant playing into his insecurities every once in a while, or making him feel bad about himself, so be it.

Now she considered the notion that she may have misjudged him. Fury had warned her not to breeze so lightly over his assessment that he may surprise her if she managed to look past her prejudices.

Perhaps she hadn’t wanted to admit she was wrong. She had never been before, after all. And truly, what had been most likely? That she, with all her previous successes, had been wrong or that Tony Stark was exactly the man he projected himself to be?

Yes, he craved approval more than anyone, and they had been - if subconsciously on Steve’s part - abusing that fact. But everyone had a limit for how much they were willing to take, and they had crossed Stark’s line one too many times to make it right.

“He clearly doesn’t want to be anymore.”

She molded over her thoughts a little longer, allowing Steve to think it over as well. But as his eyes remained stubbornly on the window overlooking the city, biting his lip as he often did without realizing, she continued.

In fairness, even when she had thought to know him, she had been wrong, and it had been arrogance keeping her from getting to understand the real him. Even as she’d considered the possibility of having made a mistake, she had refused to believe it.

All things considered, she could have made things right sooner, could have finally reevaluated her earlier analysis even if it wounded her pride. Now, it was too late, and Natasha had always been one to go forward instead of dally in the past.

“That’s exactly the message he left us by taking away FRIDAY and our weapons; he can continue being Iron Man without us.” Steve’s gaze jerked back towards hers, fixing her eyes with a glare as if the mere suggestion was preposterous. She sent him a look, prompting him to think it through. “He’s been doing just that for years before the Avengers were formed. Back then, he wasn’t as important an asset because we had SHIELD behind us. But since its fall, Tony has been the one lining our pockets and providing us with the intel we needed.”

“Then what do we do?”

If she had failed to keep Stark in their corner, so be it, but she could still continue her mission. 

“I’ve spoken with HAMMER tech’s representative. They’d be honored to provide us with the technology and funds we need to keep the Avengers running.”

“We can’t do that! Tony -,” Steve interrupted, spluttering with how quick he wanted to protest.

“Is not coming back,” she finished for him. Even he had to come to that conclusion eventually. “Unless you want this to be the end of the Avengers, we have to take this opportunity.”

Steve thought about it for a while, sitting quietly as he stared out over New York. Nat could read people like toddler books, and Steve especially was an open slate. She might have been wrong about Tony, but he was an outlier in many aspects of life.

With Steve, she could clearly see what he was thinking. The way he looked over the city with that hopeless nostalgia, that grievance for a time long passed. Now the longing wasn’t just for sixty years ago, but for the start of the Avengers, when they had just started finding their footing together and learning to work as a team. Tony had been so eager for them to bond, to form a cohesive group, and though Steve had only seen it as distracting, as Tony not taking anything seriously, she knew he was starting to realize how wrong he had truly been.

She knew Steve needed a little extra convincing, but she was happy to provide. “We can continue what we were doing before; track down Hydra bases, stop the sorcerers whenever possible… and maybe now we’ll have the time to find Barnes.”

He looked like he wanted to protest, but she hid a smirk as she could already see him starting to cave; the thought of his old best friend still ever distracting. Finally, Steve sighed, crumpling up the map in front of him and tossing it in the bin at the end of the room. “Fine, but only if we continue tracking Tony as well.”

* * *

That morning he’d spent in the lab - as most of the last two days. He’d tried to focus on his work - the prototypes for his armor around the world. They’d come out good enough, but Tony didn’t just do good. He wanted great. He _needed _perfect. It was about the protection of the earth, after all. 

Even if they could manage to avoid the conflict completely as the Ancient One had planned, Tony wanted to be ready for any possible hostility in the future.

He liked being Iron Man, but that didn’t mean he wanted to be needed for the rest of his life. He wanted peace in their time. And he wasn’t going to let one bad - disastrous - prototype get in the way of his goal.

Howard had been reprimanded many a time about a rogue project. Jarvis - the first - had told him many stories about agent Carter and how she had often been recruited to clean up his father’s messes. It did stand to reason, however, that he still continued his work. Anything is rarely perfect first try, and some things were too important to give up on.

Who knew what could have happened if Howard hadn’t succeeded in creating the Super Soldier Serum? Yes, there were bad eggs, and not everyone should be entrusted with such powers, but if they hadn’t trusted at least one, the Nazis might have won.

Often it felt like Steve couldn’t understand that. That it isn’t black and white, one choice or the other, but that sometimes people have to create their own third option. There’s nothing unnatural or unfair about that.

He couldn’t imagine what Steve would do with his life if he weren’t needed, and sometimes he felt Steve didn’t either.

He hoped the Ancient One had been right, however. Stephen had been studying almost non-stop since her death. Trying to learn everything known about the time stone and how to use it. He’d been making great progress, but puzzling the timeline together as the Ancient One had done would take time. All they had to go on now were the Ancient One’s notes, but Mordo was still hard-pressed to believe her word.

Hence why Stephen was working on checking the validity of her claims. He’d lost his mentor and friend, and somehow the responsibility of taking her place had landed on him. Tony was familiar with the feeling and couldn’t fault Stephen for needing time to work through it, even if he’d missed the sorcerer’s presence over the last few days.

Some part of him had hoped that maybe the attack in Brussels would be delayed because of it. But they couldn’t risk it. Their one good timeline too delicate to risk messing up.

It was still a struggle to accept, probably always would be, but Tony was learning to live with it. He had Stephen, and at the moment, he was focussing on that fact as much as possible. It’s why he was also glad to have something to work on, the project keeping him motivated and distracted even as he knew the tragedy about to strike.

But fate always seemed to want to test him, anyway.

Tony growled, aiming his repulsors at Steve and firing without remorse. They both hit the target; Rogers only able to block the first one before being thrown back a few steps. He steadied his footing and retaliated by throwing his Shield at Tony. He dodged, firing at Rogers once more, but as soon as the shield made it back to his hands, he changed tactics.

“JARVIS, pull all -,” he was interrupted by Rogers throwing his shield, but instead of aiming it at Tony, it hit its target on the ceiling above him. It cracked, huge slabs of concrete falling down and crushing him underneath the suit.

He groaned as he took a minute to collect himself, wondering why he’d even come at all. The apprentices would have managed to pull off the explosion, but Rhodey had warned him the Avengers would be in Brussels today.

Apparently, they had been tracking a lead for Barnes, and that it crossed their paths today seemed like a sick cosmic joke. Rhodey could only do so much to divert their attention, and though the Avengers had rarely defeated the sorcerers, their chances of beating apprentices were a lot higher. Or at least they could evacuate the building before it was supposed to or otherwise mess with their plans. Hence, Tony had shown up, after all, to distract the Avengers and make sure everything went according to their strategies.

It had worked, the explosion already having rippled through the shopping center, but Tony couldn’t quite yet relax.

He sighed one last time before moving to push his way out of the rubble. It was an easy fix, the nanobots shifting to lift the blocks off of him.

However, when he stood, glaring at Rogers as he tried to decide on what missile to launch at the super-soldier, there was a cracking sound making its way above him. The hole in the ceiling had started splitting outwards, a line edging its way in the stone until another slab of concrete came down on top of a mound of debris a little further away. He wouldn’t have thought twice about it until he thought he could hear the distant sound of crying.

“JARVIS,” he asked in a panic, his AI already on it and showing him the heat signature of a body hidden underneath the rubble. There were only supposed to be five casualties, which was already five too many for Tony’s liking, and to his knowledge, they should have been killed instantly. 

Anger coursed through him as he stared back at Rogers, the super-soldier uncaring about the extra damage he’d caused or possible deaths on his hands. He probably wasn’t even aware of it - just as Tony hadn’t without his suit - but it still showed one of the many faults of the Avengers; they didn’t account for all possibilities. Assumed they were the only people on the planet. “JARVIS, send me a box for this collectible.”

Tony kept a defensive stand after that, trying to protect the structure's integrity as much as possible. Steve seemed to finally catch on with his weird tactic only by the time Veronica arrived. It was made for Bruce, but he was sure the Hulk wouldn’t mind sharing. The armor wrapped itself around Rogers, the soldier looking around in angry confusion as it trapped him inside. He tried to punch through it, but by the time he could, if he ever would, the suit would have already taken him somewhere; he couldn’t cause any more destruction.

He had barely even seen the pod disappear before he was moving over towards the pile of rubble, carefully lifting off the pieces of debris with JARVIS’ help. Visions of Pepper swam in front of his mind, glad he was aware of the dangers as he found a way to clean up enough space to crawl into the little alcove. It was a little burrow, formed by an unusually sturdy metal table holding up the debris. A little girl was sitting in the far corner underneath it; legs pulled to her chest, and hands clenched over her ears as her tears ran freely down her cheeks. Tony recognized her in an instant as his heart broke into a million pieces, noticing the hand that was sticking out from under the debris, reaching out towards the child. He hoped she hadn’t seen it yet, pulling her attention to him as he spoke softly.

“Hey, Sophia,” the little girl looked up at him, blue eyes wide and scared, shuffling farther away from him, new tears forming in her eyes as her back struck debris, trapping her in. She started breathing heavily, whining as sobs ran through her little body.

“Hey, now,” he tried to soothe her, letting the suit crawl away and into his chest piece, reaching out his free arm. “See? I’m friendly. You’re safe now; I’ll protect you.”

She looked at him in doubt, but it was clear her need for comfort was winning out over her fear, edging closer as she reached out her own hand to touch Tony’s. Tony cupped it firmly in his own hands, softly pulling at her arm until she came willing, crying as she fell against him, tiny arms holding onto him.

The guilt building in his chest was paralyzing, but he only held on to Sophia, and carefully behind her back, he reached out a hand to the arm sticking out from the debris, checking for a pulse but as expected, finding only cold skin. 

“It’s okay,” Tony soothed the child, but as he felt her breathing against his chest, the severity of his predicament filtered through.

She shouldn’t be alive. His stepping in had been a mistake - a reflex he couldn’t fight off. He didn’t know why the earlier explosion had missed her if she had been meant to be forgotten in her little alcove or crushed when clean up teams tried to clear away the rubble.

He had stepped in when he shouldn’t have, and now his promise was echoing in the back of his head. _Promise you won’t do anything to stop it._

He hadn’t stopped it, yet he had messed up anyway, had caused four people’s deaths to be for nothing. Because there was no way, he was going to have an active hand in this girl’s death.

“_Fuck.”_

When he made it back to the sanctum, Stephen was waiting for him, face hard as he looked over his form, eyes settling on the girl at his side who watched him with scared eyes. Tony stared back at him in defiance, taking in his crossed arms and how his hands were balled into surely painful fists. They didn’t speak, Stephen barely waiting a beat before he turned around and walked away. Tony felt it like a blow to his chest, but he shifted the feeling into determination as he took in a breath and turned towards Sophia.

“Do you like cheeseburgers?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The people who read About Them probably already guessed this was going to happen 😂
> 
> What can I say; I'm a sucker for supreme fam.


	23. just like that

Stephen still hadn’t returned four days later, which was… well; he wasn’t going to lie and say it was fine. Even if he stuck to his decision and couldn’t bring himself to regret it, even if he didn’t understand Stephen’s reaction… he missed him, and it was hard.

He hid away in the lab for most of the day, in case Stephen would need something from the sanctum, but on the other hand, he couldn’t help hope bump into him when he did leave the lab for food or the occasional attempt at sleep.

He should probably move out, besides. Stephen had been pretty clear that he wouldn’t be able to handle the timeline being fucked up. Why? Tony didn’t know, but he was willing to respect his boundaries either way.

That didn’t mean he couldn’t hope for him to forgive him still.

Sophia was slowly adjusting to the sanctum, sitting quietly at a table in the lab while Tony worked. Peter had brought her a coloring book when he first met her, and he was keeping her entertained with youtube videos now while he and Harley worked on finalizing EDITH’s code.

If the timeline was fucked due to his decision to help Sophia, he might as well make sure the deaths were worth it. If he wanted to be able to look Sophia in the eyes without feeling guilty for her mothers’ death, it was the least he could do. He’d known a threat was coming for years and had filled up quite the project map based on ideas to help protect the earth.

Part of him had always hoped never to have to use those measures, that he had just been paranoid. He knew people would ask questions about the technology, that not everything about it was quite ethical. There would be debates, questions of privacy, and the amount of power put into his hands. But Tony didn’t care. They wouldn’t even have to know until the moment it was needed. According to Peter and Harley, he still had quite a following online, people standing on his side after the video leak that tore apart the Avengers. The events in Brussel had once and for all proven he wasn’t on good terms with the team and that he had Rogers locked in a security prison well…

It had only been temporary. He was keeping track of them, and without decent resources, they could only cause so much harm. He was more worried about them supposedly getting backed by Hammer Tech. The technology was messy at best, and he hoped Rhodey could keep their casualties to a minimum. He felt slightly guilty for letting his best friend babysit them, but Tony knew he was skilled - he had managed to keep Tony in check after all. At least, most of the time.

“Are you sure everything’s fine?” Harley asked hesitantly, interrupting his thoughts as he glanced up at him with serious eyes.

“Why wouldn’t it be?” Tony shrugged, avoiding the teens questioning gaze by staring at the monitor. He knew he didn’t look great with the little amount of sleep he’d gotten over the last few days, but he’d looked worse, and it wasn’t like he had any control over it; sleeping had been hard without the sorcerer by his side.

It was almost ridiculous. They hadn’t even been sleeping next to each other that long, but still, Tony couldn’t bring himself to get used to an empty bed again.

Harley looked at him, almost as tall as himself by now, and Tony could tell he was trying not to roll his eyes. “That’s not an answer.”

“No, but it is a question.”

Harley huffed but dropped the matter altogether. He returned his focus to the screen in front of him, even as his face stayed scrunched in a calculating frown.

“I’m going to get some coffee.” He sighed, stepping away from the computer and glancing over towards Peter and Sophia, “Can you guys watch Sophia for a minute?”

“Of course,” Peter answered distractedly, focussed on the cartoon they were watching. Tony rolled his eyes fondly, ruffled Harley’s hair as he stepped past him - much to the teen’s annoyance - and headed for the door.

Perhaps he should try to sleep tonight. He could feel his body starting to shut down, his brain getting foggier and foggier despite the copious amount of coffee he was consuming.

_“I like your shampoo.”_

_Stephen hummed in question, unable to look away from the book he was reading in the corner of the room. Tony was still lying in bed, dressed in - well, nothing. He didn’t mind the sorcerer’s attention having been pulled away from him. It had been endearing, actually, to have the doctor be completely aroused - and trust Tony, he had been - yet still able to pull away because of an epiphany._

_He was skimming pages now, trying to catch up with the few pages he hadn’t managed to focus on the day before. Tony didn’t really understand what it was about. Stephen had tried to explain his thought process while profusely apologizing, blushing as he had stumbled out of bed towards his books. To be honest, Tony hadn’t quite been paying attention, still too fixated on the sorcerer’s skin slipping out from underneath his fingers. _

_Yet, he thought he got his reasoning behind his new idea. It seemed interesting, even if there had been words Tony hadn’t been able to understand. Tony always loved to learn new things, but most things were just too easy for him, no two ways about it. _

_But magic was new; it was - terrifying but exciting in the right hands. And there was the logic behind it; he could feel it. Could feel the patterns in between the words and spells; he just hadn’t figured it out yet. _

_But that wasn’t why he was watching Stephen in amusement now. No, he was pretty sure he’d just witnessed his favorite expression of the sorcerer, something even better than his orgasm face. It had been almost domestic, that moment of excited breakthrough. That feeling where everything finally fit into place was something Tony knew and loved almost as much as being with – no, he wasn’t going to think about his feelings. This was nothing more than the occasional – well, rather frequent – hook-up. _

_He’d thought the sorcerer to be more than just attracted to him based on the way he teased and played in battle, always overprotective and wanting the best for him for some strange and convoluted reason. Yet as soon as he’d shown the tiniest bit of gratitude and positive emotion towards him, he’d shut down until Tony’s anger had returned. _

_“Is that cedar?” _

_Stephen glanced up at him when he spoke again, finally tearing his gaze away from the pages. Tony wasn’t trying to distract him, but he had never been one to stay quiet for long. At least not when he was comfortable around someone, and more and more, he was starting to think he was getting there with Stephen. It hadn’t been an active choice on his part, but he had felt it to be true. He trusted the sorcerer, and somehow, they were on the same page, despite being from different books. _

_Something softened in Stephen’s eyes when they found Tony, tilting his head as he lowered the book. “It’s Master Bane’s special blend. He likes to keep busy.”_

_“Can you fix me a bottle?” He asked, smirk around his lips as he could see the sorcerer’s eyes fall, tracing the curve of his ass. His legs were pulled under him as he leaned against one of the bedposts, the covers barely having covered him even before Stephen had rushed his way out from underneath. He knew he formed a pretty picture, but seeing the confirmation in the dilation of the doctor’s pupils still managed to get his blood flowing once more. _

_Stephen closed the book, tossing it aside as he stood up out of the chair, his hungry eyes fixed on Tony. Tony took a moment to run his own appreciative gaze over Stephen’s body before the sorcerer was stood above him, grabbing the back of his neck and tilting his head into a searing kiss. _

_Tony moaned happily into the touch, preening with the sorcerer’s attention on him and the heat pooling in his stomach, but was the first to pull away. “You know you can continue with your study, right? I don’t mind watching.”_

_“I can finish later,” Stephen rolled his eyes, barely finishing his sentence before he was kissing Tony again._

_“I’m serious,” Tony breathed out between touches, but Stephen was already pushing him back into the covers, the engineer all too happy to oblige. “I like watching you.”_

_Stephen pulled back as if burned, hanging over Tony as he stared at him, eyes raking over his features. Tony fought against the urge to squirm underneath the inch of distance between their bodies. His eyes were hard, and Tony frowned, displeased, knowing he had fucked up. _

_Ever since Tony had thanked him for JARVIS, their encounters had been fuelled by hatred completely faked on Tony’s part. He had figured it was the way Stephen preferred, and once again, that suspicion seemed confirmed. _

_He didn’t know why the sorcerer reacted the way he did, especially as he had been the one so caring of Tony. _

_Tony wanted that, had loved this moment of tranquillity and peace, where they could just be, could enjoy the other’s presence and feel like they had all the time in the world. Not rushed, not faked, not holding back on whatever it was that was building between them. _

_“Please, Stephen,” Tony whispered, reaching up a hand to lock it behind Stephen’s head, preventing him from getting further away than he already was. He still hung frozen above him, eyes staring at him without really seeing. Tony let his hand travel down, cupping the sorcerer’s cheek and trailing his thumbs over the skin underneath his right eye. “Let me be soft, just this once.”_

_Stephen stared as if mesmerized, allowing himself to be pulled down until their lips were barely grazing together again. Tony refused to move, refused to initiate, only breathed out slowly, knowing his breath must be tickling Stephen’s lips. Eventually, Stephen let go, and Tony’s heart sang in relief when Stephen’s full pressure fell on him again, mouth moving hesitantly but speeding up quickly. _

_Tony grinned into the kiss, hands tangling in Stephen’s hair as he turned them around and pressed Stephen into the mattress, his fingers digging into Tony’s back as he allowed Tony to touch him tenderly._

He was pulled out of his thoughts as the door to the lab closed behind him, the hallway eerily quiet without the noise of the bots and children.

He felt the disappointment only secondarily, avoiding the thought as he focused on the sorcerer in front of him, even if it hadn’t been the one he had wanted to see. It was Wong, watching him with bored eyes as per usual. There was something familiar about the scene, reminding him of the first time he’d wandered around the sanctum. Back then, it had been new, driven by curiosity; now, it was merely a habit to roam the halls, to make his way into the kitchen for a pot of coffee or maybe a piece of fruit. It still startled him now, awkward tension coursing through his body. He hadn’t seen anyone since Stephen left, and he had no idea where he stood with the other sorcerers.

Wong didn’t seem faced by his presence; however, merely nodding in acknowledgment before continuing his way.

“Wait-,” Tony called out as he winced at the sudden noise. Already hating the question before it had even left his mouth. “Have you heard from Stephen?”

“Of course,” Wong answered with a frown, “He’s at Kamar Taj working with the Time Stone.”

He could have guessed that much, himself, didn’t give any more clearance on the situation. He wondered if Stephen had even said anything to Wong; he hadn’t to Tony after all.

“I have an idea to enhance my inventions with magic,” Tony started instead, moving on from his broken heart to focus on the matter at hand, “do you have anyone who could help me with this?”

Wong stilled, eyes moving up as he frowned at the possibility. It had been a hopeful thought peeking through his exhaustion-riddled mind. He had always assumed there had to be some kind of pattern in the sorcerers' spellwork, some method to the madness.

At the very least, it could be something to keep his mind off of Stephen, focus the memories on the technical and useful.

“Our magic has never been integrated with technology before. Some have tried, and I’m sure it isn’t impossible-,” he started, looking over Tony in a calculative gaze. He looked like he was considering something while also already knowing exactly what he wanted. “There is someone whom I think would be perfect, though. Her magic is different than ours, but it has shown great compatibility with technology before. You may not like it, however.”

“Wanda,” Tony breathed as the pieces clicked together. It wasn’t hard to figure out who he meant. And though he seemed to have a point, he wasn’t looking forward to letting the witch anywhere _near _his inventions ever again. Let alone his mind. “No way.”

“She has changed, Stark,” Wong sighed, but not unkindly. Not like the Avengers trying to stop him from holding on to a ‘petty’ grudge. For the first time ever, Wong sounded exhausted. Tony assumed the last few days since the death of the Ancient One, and the looming threat of Thanos becoming more and more real hadn’t been easy for the librarian either. “Messing with the forces of the universe is not something we take kindly to or let people easily get away with. She has shown great progress, and I believe it will be beneficial for both of you to work on this project together.”

Tony stayed quiet, letting the thoughts roam through his head as he considered his options. He had no doubt Wong would allow him another partner if he truly insisted, but he also trusted his judgment. He hadn’t known him for long, but Stephen had, and he trusted him more than his own mind at times.

Wong was pragmatic and loyal, and either he had memorized a bunch of fortune cookie fortunes, or he was genuinely a wise man. He also couldn’t deny Wanda’s power. Shudders still rang through him when he remembered the mind control she had put him through, the visions and terrors. Still, he also knew how useful her telekinesis had been to them, how multifaceted and adaptable her magic truly was.

And besides all of it, the powers were derived from an infinity stone. Thanos wanted them, which meant Tony needed to be able to learn everything he possibly could about the little gems.

Stephen was guarding time, and Vision had the mind stone. If only they could find a way to neutralize their powers, make them useless to Thanos, or use them against him before he even had a chance to lay a finger on a single one.

Wanda was going to be useful to him, and if that meant he had to set aside his own fears and differences, he was going to do just that.

“Fine.” Tony sighed, aware of the pleased glint that crossed Wong’s eyes at his agreement. “Have her here by tonight.”

“I will let her know.”

“Thank you,” he nodded, bracing himself as he forced out his next words. “One last request.”

Wong only raised an eyebrow in question. 

“Can you create a new permanent portal? This time to my new loft?”

“You’re not staying in the sanctum anymore?” Wong blinked as if confused. Perhaps Stephen hadn’t been forthcoming about their issues after all. Honest, Tony didn’t quite know where they stood, either. There hadn’t been words exchanged, and though it was easy to assume they could work through this, the deal had been clear. Just like that, the sorcerer had left, and everything had changed once again. 

“I don’t want Stephen to have to avoid his own home,” Tony answered simply, trying to hide the sadness underneath his words, “I just need to be able to get to my lab in the tower and contact you if needed. I still want to help with anything I can.”

Wong was quiet for a while before shaking his head as if exasperated. He whispered something under his breath, but Tony couldn’t hear from that far away. Turning around, however, he placed the pile of books and scrolls on the table, freeing his arms as he sighed and rolled up his sleeves.

“Right. Do you have a picture?”


	24. irreplaceable

“Sophia, it’s bedtime!” He called after checking the little girl’s new bedroom. The previous few days, she had slept on the couch he used whenever he got a little too into his work, crashing onto it when every last drop of energy had been drained from him. He hadn’t wanted to leave her alone in a bedroom in the sanctum, and this way, he could easily keep an eye on her.

Now they had moved into their new loft; she had her own bedroom. He didn’t want her to get too dependent on sleeping around other people. That wasn’t good for young children or something, he… he should probably read a parenting book at some point.

When there was no answer coming from the living room, he peeked his head back out into the hallway, calling again before heading over to check on her.

She was sitting on the couch where he’d left her previously, blanket wrapped around herself.

“Didn’t you hear me, kid?” he asked in amusement, leaning against the doorway and trying to catch her eyes, which were stubbornly pointed at the black screen of the TV.

“No.”

“No, you didn’t hear me?”

“No, I don’t want to go to bed.” She replied, frown deepening as she scrunched her little face together, pulling the blanket closer around her. “I want to watch Frozen.”

Tony took a step forward, tilting his head in question as confusion started setting in. She had never fussed about going to sleep before, and she must be exhausted. He could see it in her face; her eyes already struggling to stay open. “You just watched frozen.”

“I want to watch it again.” She reiterated, stubbornness coating her words. She almost reminded him of Stephen, but Tony barely paid that thought any attention; most things reminded him of the sorcerer.

“Okay,” he started carefully, trying to figure out what to do. “You can watch it again tomorrow. Now you need to go to sleep.”

She shook her head, and Tony noticed tears were forming in the corners of her eyes, still not looking at him.

He was starting to realize he had no idea what he was doing. 

What had he been thinking? That he could raise a child? That he could be a parent?

How could he, when he’d barely had any of his own? 

He’d never considered himself to be good with kids. The teens, sure, they could hold their own against him; they were already people in their own right. Four-year-olds, not so much.

They needed guidance and firmness or whatever, something steady and loving. Tony wouldn’t really know. He barely remembered his own childhood, and either way, he wasn’t sure his parents were the best example. His mom had loved him plenty, and Tony had always entertained the idea that if they’d never died, he would have turned out okay in the end. He had always assumed his mother at least would have been able to help him grow into a respectable adult. As soon as he’d stop being a nineteen-year-old prat. 

Yet, he wouldn’t really wish anyone a dad like his either. He knew there were worse dads, was sure some part of Howard must have cared, but Tony had never really witnessed it, never felt it. Between Howard and the years of trauma he’d built up since then… let’s just say he’d never truly considered becoming a father.

With Pepper there had been a time, sure, that he’d let himself think about getting married and following the steps. Live a respectable life with a respectable woman, have some kids to continue the Stark name. But he’d never really _considered _it. Never thought it through or allowed himself to imagine what exactly that would entail. 

Perhaps he should ask Pepper to look into a good adoption agency. Give Sophia a fair chance at parents that could actually do right by her. There wasn’t much he could do about it right now, though.

Sighing, he rubbed his temples, taking a step closer to the couch, watching as Sophia’s lip started trembling. He kneeled in front of her, steadying himself as he noticed her heavy breathing. Finally, her eyes caught his, unable to ignore him from this close.

“Why don’t you want to go to sleep?”

“I want mama to put me to bed.” It was almost a whine, but Tony could tell she was trying not to. Her tears started running freely, lip trembling even more with the force of trying to hold them back. 

Tony had to fight to keep his composure, not to give in then and there, not to let the self-hatred boil over and make it about him. This girl deserved much better than he was ever going to be able to give him. She’d probably grow up to hate him in the end anyway, as soon as she learned the truth about his involvement in her mother’s death.

He needed to get to work, needed to feel tools in his hand, and like he was doing something, like he was actually making things better, making things right.

But that wasn’t what Sophia needed right now. He couldn’t just walk away when it got to be too much, couldn’t escape into his lab anymore because there was another person completely dependant on him.

He could at least try to be there for her when she still wanted him to be. 

She was still not really looking at him; big eyes focussed on his cheek as she tried to swallow down the tears. She was starting to tremble, and Tony forced out a sad smile, pulling the blanket closer around her even as he knew she wasn’t cold. He hoped to reassure her at least a little bit. But how could he really? Like there was a way to make it okay.

“I’m sorry, Sophia,” he sighed, feeling his throat close up. “What can I do?”

She was silent for a long minute, lip still trembling and tears now running freely, but eventually, she leaned closer to him and fell against his chest, sobbing into his t-shirt. Tony hadn’t expected it, but he gladly wrapped his arms around her to pull her closer. If this were what she needed, he would gladly provide.

^^^^^^^^^^

He was lying against his headboard when he heard the footsteps coming from the living room, followed by muffled voices. He had expected them, but he checked with JARVIS anyway to confirm his suspicion. Once again, there was a spike of disappointment when he confirmed the second person to be Wong instead of Stephen, but it was a feeling he guessed he needed to get used to.

Glancing down at Sophia, fast asleep against his chest, he put down the tablet he’d been working on and slowly snuck out from underneath the sleeping child.

He closed the bedroom door behind him and braced himself as he headed into the living room. It was easiest to focus on Wong first. The sorcerer had turned towards him as soon as he’d heard him enter and nodded at him in greeting. Tony returned the gesture, keeping his eyes a little longer. “You sure about this?”

“I am,” Wong answered simply, making Tony sigh as he fought against the tension in his chest. He didn’t know what he’d expected. Wong wasn’t the kind of guy to go ‘actually you know what. This is a dumb idea. I’ll bring you Sara instead. She’s very kind and terribly at mind control magic’. It would have been nice if he had been, however.

“Fine,” he gritted his teeth, not really seeing another option. Bracing himself, he put up a smile and turned towards the young adult standing a few steps to his left. “Maximoff. Good to see you again.”

He’d known seeing her again after all this time would be weird. They had never really been on good terms, both avoiding each other as much as possible for the short amount of time they’d both been on the same team. Yet, he hadn’t anticipated just how uncomfortable he would truly feel.

She looked different than he remembered. In his head, she had always look angry and intense, smothered with red smoke and hair floating dangerously behind her like a winter storm. It might be a little overdramatic, but that’s been his experience with her so far.

Now she looked almost demure. Her hair was pulled in a high ponytail, usual curls almost drooping and straightened out, and she was wearing casual clothes, merely jeans and a red wool sweater. Her face looked a combination of bored and annoyed, which would have been a relief if it wasn’t so disquieting. Her eyes were still as intense, but at least they weren’t burning holes into his own. 

Why it was so unsettling, Tony couldn’t quite place. Surely it should have been better than the passionate hatred he had always noticed before.

“You’re a terrible liar, Stark,” she huffed, rolling her eyes. Her tone was amused, however, glancing around the apartment. “If I knew all it took was getting you to fall in love with a sorcerer to get you this miserable, I’d have set you up months ago.”

Tony frowned at her. He knew rationally she was joking; it was just weird coming from her. It almost reminded him of the Avengers, though even they would never joke this openly at his expense. In a way, it was refreshing.

“Don’t mind her,” Wong sighed, rolling his eyes. “She’s just always in a cranky mood.”

Wanda shrugged at Wong’s comment, crossing her arms over her chest and turning her gaze towards the windows overlooking the city. Tony guessed it had been a while since she’d been in New York, maybe even since she’d seen a place other than Kamar Taj.

“Right,” Tony started, unsure, puffing out his chest and putting on his big boy face. He never liked showing his discomfort in front of people. He’d been taught from an early age that you had to take whatever someone said to you, even if it hurt your feelings. He’d never been as good as Howard would have liked, but he’d managed to get by. “I take it Wong told you what I wanted to do?”

Her eyes slid towards him without turning her head, but she nodded, quickly focusing on the window once more. He noticed her shoulders relax by the second. Tony guessed he couldn’t blame her for being tense. She had been avoiding him as much as he had her, but he’d always assumed it had been because she hated the sight of him.

“Good, cause I want to get started as soon as-,” He was interrupted by Sophia running into the room and calling his name. He frowned as he saw her. She seemed distressed, but as soon as she noticed Tony, she relaxed and ran up to him, wordlessly holding up her arms.

Tony picked her up in a swift movement, placing her on his hip as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders.

She must have woken up and panicked when she couldn’t see Tony, but he had the vague impression she was already starting to fall asleep against his shoulder again. He petted the back of her head, hoping to comfort her, but he kept his focus on Wanda, who had turned back from the window and was now watching them with confusion. “How long have you had a child?”

“About five days now.”

She perked her eyebrow at his answer, probably noticing the defensive tone in his voice, but he breathed through his annoyance. “Look, just go back to the sanctum and get some sleep. We’ll start tomorrow at nine.”

She nodded and glanced at Wong, and they left swiftly, using the permanent portal Wong had put in earlier.

“FRIDAY, lights out, please,” Tony sighed as the apartment was empty again, rolling out his shoulders as he rocked Sophia slightly around the dim room. 

^^^^^^^^^

“Are you sure this is a good idea?”

It hadn’t been the first time since leaving May’s apartment that Peter had asked the question, so Harley didn’t bother with a response. If Peter had really been this worried, he should have stopped him before they’d snuck out of his window. He shouldn’t have entertained his worries as they had tried to fall asleep, and he definitely shouldn’t have told him of the portal leading straight to Kamar Taj. 

The thing was that Harley might be a little overprotective of Tony. He was well aware. He wasn’t one to let go of people that got close to him. His own father had gotten away, but he wasn’t going to let anyone else sneak out from under him. This also meant he had to make sure the people he cared about wanted to stick around, that they were happy.

Tony wasn’t happy. 

He had been for a while, Harley had been able to tell. Even if he didn’t necessarily trust the sorcerer - he didn’t trust easily, so it wasn’t necessarily _Stephen_’s fault, but he _was _a villain - he had been able to tell that Tony had been more content. It had shown through him feeling at ease enough to introduce him to them. The Avengers had never gotten the same curtesy.

The sanctum door opened easily to them. Harley wasn’t sure if it was magic or wards or just that they had forgotten to lock the door, either way, he was grateful for it as he turned around to shush Peter before sneaking further inside.

“_I’m _the one with spider sneak ability, you know,” Peter mumbled behind him. Harley glared at him over his shoulder, continuing his way inside. The sanctum seemed mostly empty. Tony should be in his flat with Sophia by now, or in his lab, he guessed. No one else should be around.

“So, where were those doors?” Harley whispered at Peter. The other teen still seemed reluctant, but he stepped in front of him, leading them into a hallway to their left.

If Peter didn’t want Harley to sneak out to find Stephen, then he shouldn’t have told him exactly how to get to him. And it was Stephen’s own fault for taking Peter to train in Kamar Taj in the first place.

The doors were much like the ones leading to Tony’s lab and apartment; only this one looked out easily into a dark room with stone walls. 

Harley perked up when he noticed it, glad their plan was working, and he took the lead again, patting Peter on the head as he passed him. Peter hissed in annoyance, and Harley could feel him roll his eyes. He wasn’t worried about Peter actually getting - or at least staying - mad at him. He’d buy him a churro or something.

The dark room opened into a library, and Harley looked around the new space in intrigue. He had a mission and needed to stay focused, but man, this place was weird. “Are sorcerers too good for normal bookshelves? Surely they would provide more storage space.”

Peter nervously shushed him, and Harley shrugged as they continue walking. Voices were coming from the adjourning room, and Peter pulled Harley aside to hide behind the wall next to the doorway. Harley tried to listen to what they were saying, sure he could recognize the voice as Strange’s.

“This is not about whether or not I love him!” they could hear Stephen yell. Harley snuck closer, Peter climbing onto the wall towards the ceiling to be able to be stealthier. He peeked his head around the door, recognizing the man Stephen was yelling at from the news. His name was Mordo if he remembered correctly, but he didn’t quite care, merely focusing on Stephen’s words. “There’s no point in loving him if we don’t find a way to fix this!”

It hadn’t been his plan to eavesdrop.

He hadn’t truly had a plan. He had just wanted to talk to Stephen. Peter had assured he was nice, and Harley had to admit he thought his magic was pretty cool, but that didn’t matter right now.

“Strange,” Mordo argued, voice strained, “even if there is a timeline where everything works out the way you want it, there still won’t be a guarantee that it will work out! We’ve tried multiple now, and each time something eventually throws us off course!”

“Then what do you suggest?” Stephen asked. It didn’t sound like a question. He sounded angry, desperate. “We just give up? Go with the flow? See what happens? Go to Bora Bora and wait for the universe to end?”

Another voice sounded up, softer, and more careful. Harley knew it was Wong, the only other sorcerer they’d been introduced to. “We’re merely suggesting you don’t run yourself ragged. Stark-,”

“No,” Stephen snarled. Harley was surprised by the force of it, almost flinching back at how pained it sounded. “Don’t talk to me about him. I need to focus. I need to find a way-,”

There was something about the tone of his voice that made Harley back away. Peter looked at him worriedly, but he only shook his head silently at him. This wasn’t their business. Stephen was right; he needed to focus.

Because Harley had a sneaking suspicion, something priceless was on the line.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SORRY THEY'RE NOT TOGETHER YET
> 
> all in due time 😬
> 
> thanks for all the lovely comments! they mean the world 💕


	25. letting go

Tony only noticed the lines of stress on Stephen’s face because he knew his sorcerer. They seemed unassuming to the untrained eye, but Tony noticed the difference at once. He hadn’t seen Stephen this stressed before ever, the skin under his eyes just the tiniest bit darker than usual and hands eerily unmoving, covered in his gloves.

Usually he only steadied them with magic when the shaking became too much to bear, or when he wanted to portray an image of strength. Tony didn’t understand; he only ever saw Stephen’s resilience when looking at his hands, loved their feel against his and the way they carefully mapped out his skin. There was nothing weak about how they pushed Tony into the mattress or held Tony’s attention in an iron grip.

He avoided looking at Tony as he entered, but at this point the engineer couldn’t be sure if it was on purpose or because he just hadn’t noticed his presence yet.

Tony looked his fill while he could. He hadn’t seen Stephen in almost two weeks, and though it hurt to have the sorcerer so close now yet having to keep his distance… it was a relief to see him, still.

“Right,” Stephen started, no trace of the exhaustion he must surely be feeling in his voice. “I’ve managed to start searching for possible solutions with the time stone, but it’s going slowly. I can’t yet see multiple at a time as the Ancient One had, and this far all signs point to Thanos’ arrival being inevitable. In other words, we need to start working on defence and pushing to give earth its best chance.”

“Isn’t that what we have been doing before?” A master spoke up from across the table. Tony barely spared him a glance, focussing on Stephen’s face which remained impassive despite the annoyed tone of the other master. “It still wasn’t enough.”

“Time is a fickle thing, Master Finnigan,” Tony had to smirk at the words, so professional sounding yet full of disdain. He wanted to catch Stephen’s eyes, share his amusement, but then he was reminded that they weren’t … well they just weren’t anymore. He glanced back down at his lap, sadness quickly replaced by annoyance. “That doesn’t mean we can stop trying. Any other helpful input or can we get back to trying to save the universe?”

Master Finnigan grumbled but stayed quiet, no other sorcerers speaking up as they continued the meeting. After his first words, Stephen allowed Mordo to take over, sitting down in his chair and following the meeting attentively. He remained quiet for the most part, only answering questions when asked. Tony guessed he must have discussed all of it with Mordo before, the master able to answer most questions as if he’d been the one to come up with them.

Tony … well, he wasn’t paying as much attention as he’d like. Instead his mind stayed focussed solely on Stephen, watching intently as the man continued to ignore him, carefully avoiding Tony’s gaze.

He didn’t look in Tony’s direction once, even if Tony had been sure he must have felt his glare against his neck.

Tony leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms as he tried not to scowl. He needed to focus on the meeting, needed to focus on getting things in order and preparing for the final event. Yet, he felt like a slighted ex, pouting about Stephen not paying him attention, about him ignoring him like he meant nothing. He knew he did, he knew Stephen cared for him. He had known for months. Had known since their very first meeting.

Back then the sorcerers rarely attacked directly. They sent creatures of other dimensions, cast spells that messed with everyone’s day and tossed random people into portals whenever they pleased. He guessed with what he knew now, the people weren’t so random after all, but back then it had been infuriating trying to find a pattern. Because there hadn’t been one. Just whatever they had needed to do to shift the timeline closer to their choosing.

Wanda had still been on their team when they had tried tracking them down, interviewing the abductees without getting any useful information and fighting the creatures they sent. Back then they’d still been certain they could beat the sorcerers, like they had beaten everything before that.

The first time the sorcerers attacked in person, it was almost tied, both sides being able to deal out heavy blows, but then Stephen had shown up…

He was gorgeous, all swift movement and calculated power, moving around the battlefield like he was on a different plain entirely, like nothing could truly touch him and he knew it.

The lines on his face were bored as he pulled artefacts out of thin air and swept the floor from underneath every avenger. He looked truly annoyed as he did, clearly hoping to get it over with as quickly as possible, like he had more important, more interesting places to be.

Knowing Stephen now, he’d probably wanted to get back to his studies as quickly as possible, viewing the field work as tedious and stupid, something for the apprentices to amuse themselves with.

Back then it had been infuriating.

Tony had lived for protecting people, yet this sorcerer was so efficient at hurting them without even caring. Perhaps it had been jealousy at his power, at how easy it must be to protect the earth if he had what Stephen did.

It still wasn’t an explanation as to why he hadn’t been able to keep his eyes off of him, however.

It had distracted him while fighting the other sorcerers, made him slow and stupid, until eventually Stephen noticed him too.

Tony still clearly remembered the amused tilt of his lip as he stopped mid air to look at him. He was sweating inside his suit by then, helmet already knocked off during a previous blow and panting heavily. Even as Stephen hadn’t been attacking him yet, Tony had already been glaring at him, which had clearly only piqued his interest more.

He stopped fighting Natasha like it was nothing, like she wasn’t worth his breath, floating upwards to watch Tony battle instead. He could feel his eyes on him as he tried to ward off a group of apprentices, burning his skin and setting his blood boiling. He looked untouchable up in the air, and Tony only felt annoyed and weak.

That had been the first time Stephen’s attention had been on him fully, and it had never really left since then, yet here they were, and it bothered him more than that first moment.

He tried to follow the meeting, he really did, but they were talking about defence and wards and pieces put in place. Tony knew his role wasn’t tied to any of it so he didn’t mind too much that his attention was still slipping. Yet, he didn’t even want to think about Stephen anymore, despite it usually being all he did. It hurt to look at him, to think of him as if he wasn’t sitting only five feet away, refusing to meet his eyes.

Instead he let his mind wander back to his inventions.

Working with Wanda was… well it wasn’t as bad as he’d expected.

They barely had to talk, so they didn’t. He worked on the coding and deciphering the books and the previous research done by sorcerers he’d gotten from Wong, trying to find a way to set up tests to integrate the magic with his technology. Wanda sat in the corner doing her own research, practicing spells and trying to find more information on the infinity stones.

Whenever Tony wanted to try something, they worked together - after pointing the children towards the safety of the kitchen -, but merely following the steps and praying it worked. This far they had managed to put magic in electrical objects but couldn’t connect the two.

The first tests seemed to be promising this far. EDITH had been fully completed; they only needed a way to get the magic fused into it to be activated by the machine itself instead of a sorcerer. The coding was different, needed to pull into the energy field of the universe, but Tony was sure he would manage it eventually.

He just needed someone more versed in magical theory.

Wanda was powerful, but no one knew magic the way Stephen did. Maybe he should corner him after the meeting, and ask him for his idea on the matter, after all.

He might corner him just because.

Yet by the time he’d gotten up out of his chair, Stephen was already gone.

Not one to give up that easily, he scoured the halls anyway trying to find a way to locate Stephen. It was only pure coincidence that he eventually bumped into him in the sanctum while heading back to his lab in defeat.

He was sure he hadn’t imagined the way Stephen’s back stiffened at the sound of his footsteps, but he didn’t turn around. He didn’t continue his way up the stairs either, however, which Tony took as an invitation to walk closer and open his mouth.

“Stephen-,” Tony started, hating how desperate his voice sounded without really knowing what to say. He shifted his tone once his thoughts were collected, taking a deep breath as he continued, anxious fire burning under his skin. “We need to talk…”

Tony noticed his gloves were gone, longingly staring at the pale hand holding on tightly to the bannister. He rolled his shoulders back, standing up straight as he moved to continue his way up the stairs, not even acknowledging him.

“_Seriously?_” Tony baffled, looking up at Stephen’s form in disbelieve, irritation starting to crawl underneath his skin. Stephen glanced back at him, sending him a warning glare as he stopped once more, a warning which Tony quickly ignored.

“You walked away.” Tony growled at him, crossing his arms to try and stop the incessant twitching of his fingers.

Tony hadn’t intended to grovel, hadn’t intended to get angry. He didn’t feel like he had the right…, but seeing Stephen so blatantly ignore him, look at him with such a cold glare … Tony couldn’t help himself.

For months the mere sight of him had been enough to set Tony’s blood boiling, the only thing able to cool him down being Stephen’s pale skin against his, his hands that always seemed to be cold mapping out his body. Or perhaps it had just shifted the burn to something else, to passion instead of anger, a healthy way of letting go.

Perhaps that was the reason Tony was getting so fired up now, having been starved of his cooling agent for too long, the heat inside him begging for a release.

Because even as his mind screamed at him to just let it go, to leave Stephen to his rightful hurt…, he couldn’t. It didn’t _feel _rightful.

Was one mistake enough for the sorcerer to give up on him like so many others had? Like the Avengers that Stephen had despised for that exact reason. Didn’t it make him a hypocrite to abandon him like they had?

“Stark-…,”

“Don’t you dare,” Tony snapped, taking a step forward in anger. His hand shot up again, unable to stay still after all as it pointed an accusing finger at Stephen. The man already towered over him normally, but the fact that he was stood halfway up the stairs definitely didn’t help. Tony didn’t let it bother him as he fought back.****“Don’t ‘Stark’ me, _Stephen.”_

“I didn’t try to mess up, alright!” Now he was going, he couldn’t stop himself anymore, mouth three interstates further than his mind, desperately trying to keep track of his thoughts as they spiralled through his head. Yet, he was pleased to find his voice coming out harsh and determined, mirroring the anger that was taking the lead. “Even if that’s all I seem to be able to do. But, no, I don’t regret it this time! Do I wish the easy path had worked out? Yes, of course, but you can’t hold it against me that I couldn’t kill an innocent child!”

Anger was shifting over Stephen’s own face now, the cold exterior broken as his own emotions surfaced. He managed to stay quiet however, about to turn away and continue up the stairs, keeping his thoughts to himself, about to walk away from the conversation, away from Tony. 

“Look, I love you,” Tony started, unsure as to why he even tried to play that card, but he hated the lack of Stephen’s attention, the fear that if he let the sorcerer walk away again, it would be the end of.. whatever was still going between the two of them, “and I don’t care that you didn’t say it back, but I know you do too! You’re seriously going to keep holding this against me instead of trying to forgive me? And working this out together?”

“I don’t see what’s the _point_, Tony!” Stephen swivelled around, finally looking Tony in the eyes, his own hard with frustrated anger. “I don’t know how to _fix this!”_

Stephen’s words, the resentment so clear on his face, twisted his own anger to desperation. Desperation that perhaps this truly was the end, that Stephen truly would leave him, that he’d be alone. That he didn’t deserve any more.

It rose the panic in his chest, quickly followed by images of the world ending, all too familiar by now, except with one noticeable difference; now it wasn’t just Tony not having done enough, it was him as the causality.

Stephen’s eyes shifted towards him momentarily, seemingly noticing the shift in Tony’s feelings, but he didn’t give in, the sorcerer breathing heavily himself now.

He tried to swallow down his inner turmoil, refocus on his anger towards Stephen, but his next words still came out raspy and out of breath, even as he glared daggers at the doctor.

“I know the timeline is fucked Stephen, and possibly so is the universe altogether! I know it’s my fault! But why won’t you just let us fight back together? We can still protect the universe-!”

“I don’t _care _about the universe, Tony!” Stephen roared, making Tony flinch slightly as he took in another shaky breath. Stephen took the few steps down in a flash. Tony almost didn’t realise he was getting closer until he was right in front of him, framing Tony’s face with his hands and tilting it up, his own barely a hair width away. As soon as Tony’s eyes met his, he let his shaking hands drop to Tony’s collar, gripping tightly so the fabric bunched up between his fingers, pulling Tony ever closer towards him. His eyes were still ablaze, anger reflected easily in his icy blue-green eyes. “I don’t care half the universe might die; I care that you risked _your __life _by disobeying the good timeline!”

“I’m not going anywhere,” His words came out as a gasp, like a quiet revelation, and steadying himself he noticed the trembling of Stephen’s hands, still clutching his shirt. From this close he could see the exhaustion and grief behind those hard eyes, the desperation and fear, and he could feel his heart stutter to a halt, understanding finally coursing through him. “Hey-, Stephen - _honey_, I’m not, okay! I’m going to protect us, the teens, Sophia, everyone that matters.”

“You _can’t_! Don’t you think I would have tried anything else? I can’t find the right timeline!”

“Then stop looking!” Tony argued, still breathless with Stephen’s face so close by, with the way his heart called out for the man in front of him. “We know the key factors! So just fight those back step by step!”

“Tony,” Stephen breathed, teeth grinding together, “I don’t want to lose you…”

“Then don’t! Don’t toss me aside.”

Stephen continued staring at him, searching his eyes as if entranced. There was something holding him back, Tony noticed. He moved to cup Stephen’s face, thumb soothing the pale skin. Stephen shuddered slightly at the touch, and eventually, to Tony’s relief, he nodded, only the slightest of movements.

With a sigh, and almost scared that Stephen would change his mind, Tony linked his hands behind Stephen’s head, pulling him down into the crook of his neck. The sorcerer trembled against him, and Tony cupped his hands around Stephen’s fingers, soothing him into easing his grip. Stephen’s breathing was shallow, but eventually he allowed Tony to unhook his shirt and pull Stephen closer, Stephen’s unsteady hands tentatively landing on Tony’s lower back.

Tony could feel Stephen relax against his shoulder, shuddering against the soft skin of his neck, as he himself could feel his nerves fire happily at having Stephen against him again.

They stood together for a while, until eventually Stephen stopped shaking. Tony was the one to pull back, cupping Stephen’s cheek again, his eyes still closed. When he finally opened them to look at Tony, they were reddened, the sight making his heart squeeze uncomfortably. “It’s almost one in the morning in Nepal, Stephen. Please, get some sleep.”

It took another second, but eventually Stephen nodded once more. When he moved to turn around and head up the stairs, however, Tony stopped him, lightly grabbing his hand. With a small smile, he pulled Stephen in the opposite direction, pleased to see him follow without protest.

If Stephen seemed surprised by the new door, he didn’t show it, nor when they stepped into Tony’s flat. Tony relaxed when he could hear the teens’ voices coming from Sophia’s room, but paid it no mind as he pulled Stephen towards his own bedroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was going to wait to get them back together a little while longer but ... well I want them happy again as well 😝
> 
> A big thank you to everyone who commented on the last chapter! and I'm so so sorry this one took a little bit longer than usual 😬
> 
> also the first draft of that final scene was going to be way more intense but it didn't really fit the story or tone 😂 was fun to write though.


	26. differences

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Quarantine everyone! Please do stay at home as much as possible and follow the social distancing and hygiene rules! 
> 
> And please for the love of god stop hoarding toilet paper

His mood was better than it had been in days as he continued working on one of his latest projects. Not EDITH, but rather something to keep his mind off of everything. For a few moments, he didn’t want to think about the future, or what was at stake. He merely wanted to bask in the present, now everything seemed to be going at least a little bit right for him. 

Stephen was hopefully still resting, and Tony couldn’t help but feel like a massive weight had been lifted off his shoulders. 

So, for the first time in a while, music was playing in his lab. Not as loud as usual, but pleasantly in the background, enough to keep his brain engaged and heighten his already great mood, but not enough to drown out the noise of the other people in the lab. Harley was working on his AI, sending questions and updates his way every so often. Peter was sitting opposite him with a bunch of books spread around him, preferring to put some time into his schoolwork, and Sophia was sitting on the worktable in front of Tony. 

He had given her a small bowl of grapes and an order to chew carefully before swallowing, and she didn’t mind amusing herself while Tony worked on the nanotech in front of him. If his mother could see her, she would chastises her for playing with her food, but Tony only smiled at the sight, accepting the grapes gratefully every time she offered him one. 

Thinking about his parents was getting easier again, at least, well,… as long as he kept it focussed on the happy memories. Or at least the not bad ones. 

When Wanda walked into the lab, he didn’t even flinch anymore. Her presence had become familiar by now, and though he remained vigilant, she never gave him a reason to regret her presence. As usual she went to sit at one of the desks, opened the book she’d last been reading and continued her studies calmly. 

She always took the one closest to and facing the big windows. It was raining, the noise not making it through the soundproofed walls, but tears were running down the windows, and Wanda kept getting distracted watching them. 

He couldn’t really blame her. The view was even better than his apartment. The windows were dark against the yellow light from the lab, however, with the sky outside a dreary grey. 

He wasn’t really planning on continuing their experiments today. He kind of wanted to wait and see if Stephen had some time to help them as soon as he was feeling better. Usually, there would be a buzz under his skin telling him to go harder and faster, to not waste any minute of prep for the fight at hand. 

But he was sick of constant stress without a resolution. The ceaseless striving towards a deadline that for all he was aware was five or more years away. Or maybe it would be next week. Perhaps Thanos’ fleet was passing into their solar system as he was stood here, thinking, wasting his time. 

If the threat truly was that imminent, Stephen would have foreseen it, he soothed himself, and until that moment - whether they were prepared or not - they’d have to live with the thought looming over them. 

Watching Stephen had shown that he couldn’t work himself to destruction like he had been trying to, that even if they would manage to be completely certain of their victory over Thanos, … Well, Tony knew himself enough by now to realise he’d probably still be worrying. He’d been lucky to have the teens and Sophia as a distraction these last few weeks. If he hadn’t, he might have crashed and burned like Stephen had. 

He didn’t want that, for neither of them, so it was time for him to learn to let go every once in a while. It’s what he wanted for Stephen, at least, for the sorcerer to have moments of peace and happiness in between the worry. So perhaps he should start with trying to be a good example. 

“Tony?”

“Yes, princess,” Tony looked up from his work as the tiny voice pulled him from his thoughts. She scooted closer towards the edge of the table, holding out her hands in a sign that he could decipher all too easily. He helped picked her up and put her down on the floor, and he watched her run off towards Harley, tugging at his sleeve until he let her sit on his lap.

He wanted this for him and Stephen, these tiny moments of quiet domesticity, where they could just exist near each other without the weight of the world crushing them. 

There was a reason he hadn’t told the teens about what they were doing, why he had sided with the sorcerers and what was at risk. Knowledge can be very harmful indeed, and though Tony and Stephen could never return to blissful ignorance, he at least hoped they could get over the worry every once in a while, to just live in the present instead of fearing the future. 

Moment after silent moment passed in the lab, until eventually the teens left to watch a movie with Sophia - after having been warned to stay quiet so they wouldn’t wake Stephen. 

Harley threw him a surprised look at that, but Tony wrote it off as mere concern. He simply watched Harley’s eyebrow raise and pretended not to notice it as the teen smoothed out his features again. 

Tony loved the kid, but he wished he wouldn’t worry for him that much. It only made him feel even more guilty. 

The lab was a lot quieter without them, though, the music seeming almost empty without the presence of the teens. He found himself getting more distracted as he worked, and when FRIDAY spoke up, he almost welcomed the reprieve. 

“Hammer Technology is trying to hack into my coding again, Boss.” She sounded almost annoyed, as much as the AI could, and it made her Scottish accent even more chipped.

“Don’t waste your data, FRIDAY,” Tony shrugged, smile tugging at his lip just imagining Justin getting his knickers in a twist trying to outdo Tony’s genius. This far he hadn’t really been a problem. Sure, it was annoying thinking about Hammer messing with his tower - the project he and Pepper had worked on for months - but at least there was only so much harm he could do. He was certain enough no one could mess with the Tower’s technology, and according to Rhodey all Hammer had really done for the avengers this far was provide money and weapons.

The thought of Hammer Weapons out in the world - and even worse, in the hands of the Avengers - made him uneasy, but Rhodey had assured he had everything under control.

“What’s with Hammer?” 

Tony startled, quickly glancing towards the witch who was watching him with a confused crease in her eyebrows. He wasn’t sure when the silence between them had become comfortable enough for him to forget she was there, and he didn’t really know how to feel about it either. “You don’t know? I left the Avengers cold Turkey.”

Wanda’s confusion deepened slightly, until she finally seemed to get what he meant. A chuckle escaped her then, and it was such a surprising sound, Tony couldn’t help but stare. He wasn’t quite sure what reaction he had expected. She had left the Avengers herself, and apparently of her own volition, but still he had always thought he had been the only Avenger Wanda had had a problem with. 

“Never considered us to be that similar.” 

The words took a moment to filter through his brain, swivelled around his mind for him to taste, and he placed his tools on the table as he turned to face her fully. She seemed to have made the comment offhand, eyes already trained on her book once more, and he really should let it go, but something made him speak up anyway…

“What do you mean?”

The tone in his voice made her look up again, eyebrows once again furrowed. She slowly closed the book and pushed it away, apparently realising the conversation was turning into a thing. He could see her think over her words, feeling them on her tongue before finally speaking. Tony’s hands were resting on the table in front of him, still for once, not fiddling at top speed as they usually would be. 

“I never had any affection for the Avengers,” Wanda started, tilting her head slightly as she continued. “They only ever looked at me with fear, and I don’t have to be a genius to figure out they were just keeping me around because they were afraid of what I could do away from their control.”

“Then why did you stay?” Tony rolled his eyes at his words, gesticulating with his hands as he took them back. “Stay as long as you did, I mean. Why not decline the …_ invitation_ in the first place?”

“It’s not like I had anywhere else to go,” Wanda shrugged, eyes fading as she spoke, mind drifting away slightly before focussing back on the conversation. “But staying around them… I didn’t really like it either. So I did everyone a favour and stuck to myself.”

“And here I thought it was just me you were avoiding.”

Wanda scoffed slightly at that, lips tilting almost pleasantly; “I’m not angry at you anymore. I mean, we’re even right? After Ultron I kind of lost all right to be angry at anyone.”

Tony frowned, frozen in place as he stared at her. “Right.”

It wasn’t exactly what he’d expected. He’d always thought her to be petty and childish, and though every death caused by his weapons whether or not approved by him weighed him down, he had always known Wanda’s anger towards him had been unjust. 

Especially as that anger had torn down an entire city. 

But this… He _wanted_ things to be - if not okay, at least civilised - between them, _wanted_ desperately to have another ally on his side, so he really wanted to just take it as an olive branch and work around their differences. He’d been so good at biting his tongue for so long, and yet,… “Actually, not right.”

It was her turn to freeze now, book halfway open again and gaze moving up to fix on his as her smile started to falter, and maybe it was due to his conversation with Stephen earlier in the day but once again he couldn’t stop now he had started. 

“You manipulated me,” he spoke, voice hard, “You went into my mind and showed me my worst fears. Do you care at all that you violated people’s minds?” 

Tony could feel a knot in his chest unravel as he continued talking, unaware of its presence in the first place, but he revelled in the relief it brought him, and it kept him going, getting surer with each word. “I get that all comes second to the actually disaster that killed thousands, but that doesn’t mean people aren’t still hurting. That they’re not still dealing with the aftereffects of your mind control and the images you put in their heads. 

I can’t speak for the Avengers, but do you wonder why _I _couldn’t trust you?”

Wanda looked frozen, face draining of colour as her smile had completely dropped into slightly parted lips. She didn’t reply, seemingly tongue-tied, but Tony wasn’t really waiting for an answer anyway. 

“It’s because I have no guarantee that what I’m seeing or what I’m feeling is the truth. That my thoughts and emotions are actually mine or that someone else is messing with me. 

I made a lot of choices lately that I don’t regret. Choices that I _wanted_ to make, and that made me happier. But how do I know that it wasn’t because of you? How do I know you didn’t manipulate me into leaving the Avengers? Into making all of this happen, into _falling in love_? How could I possibly trust anything you say?”

Wanda looked at him with wide eyes, frozen in place as she listened to him speak. Tony thought he could see sympathy and the beginning of regret build in her features, but now he’d spoken the words out loud he finally realised how true they were. 

His perception might be screwed; she could be showing him whatever she wanted him to see, and how would Tony be able to tell real from reality? 

He had once seen his company as pure. A saviour to the American people, self-righteous and morally sane. But just because he couldn’t see the poison underneath didn’t mean it wasn’t there. His attention and his view of the world had been shifted, woven together and cleaned up by one of the people he’d trusted most. He’d listened to Obie - Obadiah, and because of that he had made choices, and done things that he never would have if he’d seen the world for what it really was. 

How could he know all of this was right? When all his actions and beliefs could have been shifted into a narrative he would endorse? What if Tony _was_ wrong? How could he possibly ever think that Captain America, the man who people trusted so easily, the man who’d seen the world’s darkest corners and fought purely for the sake of it, be wrong? How could he think himself capable or authorised to make decisions for billions of people? 

“I-I’m,” Wanda started, paling with her words as she blinked through her shock. “I… I didn’t think of it like that.”

Tony sighed, suddenly exhausted, and he shifted his gaze away from the witch and towards the windows. “You know what? It’s fine. I just… I need to start dinner.”

He just saw her nod as if entranced, still frozen in her seat, before he turned around and fled. He was wind up now, spine hurting with tension, and as he leaned on his kitchen counter and tried to breathe through it, he regretted having said anything at all.

He had meant every word, but he couldn’t hold back the anxiety coursing through him now. Acknowledging it had made it more real. He’d chosen to fight, and somewhere his body had known it was in danger. Even though his mind might have known Wanda wouldn’t actually have attacked him anymore, his body was still lingering on the memory of scarlet sparks.

It was when the sound of footsteps running into the kitchen caught his attention, that he finally snapped up and pulled himself out of it. Picking Sophia up as she ran at him was almost instinct by now, and he easily placed her on his hip as he used the pressure of her tiny body as comfort. 

“Hello,” he spoke as she buried her face in his neck, causing Tony to chuckle as her curly hair tickled his chin. “Want to help me make dinner?”

She nodded and Tony could sense she was getting tired, probably exhausted from hanging out with the teens all afternoon. 

Speaking of the devils… “Pete! Harls! Come set the table!”

Collective groans came from the living room and immediately Tony’s good mood was restored again, smiling as he watched the teens trudge in. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No Stephen this chapter but dw he's getting the rest he deserves 🙏🏻
> 
> My exams have been postponed so let's see if my creativity gets the message and I can start writing a lot again 🙃
> 
> Stay sane and healthy and help lessen the strain on healthcare workers by keeping yourself quarantined (infected or not)! 💕


	27. holding on

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope everyone is still happy and healthy! 
> 
> Don't want to talk too much about the big Q going on except for the fact that it's working here in Belgium and daily new cases and deaths are already going down! So I hope other countries will take an example and enforce stronger measures as well! STAY INSIDE! (gives you more time to read fan fictions anyway!)
> 
> Enjoy!

Everyone around him had considered him altruistic for working non-stop. For barely taking the time to sleep, not even bothering with astral projection as he worked himself to the brink of exhaustion time and time again.

Perhaps it was an easy mistake to make.

But Stephen’s motivations had been nothing but selfish, as he had spent the last two weeks trying to save _himself _from inevitable doom.

It seemed ridiculous, that one live saved could have messed up everything they had been working towards, but that was how fragile time was, how hard it was to work against the Universe’s everlasting pull towards chaos.

And in the end, the universe would have that live repaid by Tony to set things right.

Their one good timeline was lost, and Stephen had already seen all the other options that were left. The Ancient One had shown him ages ago, to instil the importance of every task they had. To have him break Tony’s heart by showing him the fate of his parents. 

The Ancient One had warned him about the consequences of Thanos’ arrival, assured him there was no other solution but prevention, that trying to save the universe was futile.

At least for Stephen, because trading away the love of his life was not something Stephen was planning to do, no matter how many lives it would save.

For all he’d already given – his hands, his career, his life (again and again and again and again) – he could not give up Tony.

As mentioned, he wasn’t as selfless as people liked to believe.

If Tony only knew that the price for everyone’s safety was his own life – Stephen knew he would take the deal in an instant. Which is why he would never be allowed to know.

His heart and spirit were some of the things he loved so dearly about Tony, how he put others before him and always fought for a better option, but as much as he wanted to trust that Tony would find another solution now, he couldn’t risk it. Too much was at stake.

So he’d willingly fallen into insanity, searching the timelines again and again, his back and arms burning from trying to carry the weight of the universe on his shoulders.

But not to save the universe. To save himself from inevitable heartbreak.

Because despite his best attempts, he had failed to find a solution, and even worse, he had failed to fall out of love with Tony Stark.

When he woke up, he was surprised to see it was already dark outside, suggesting he had slept for at least eight hours - more, if the sleeping body next to him was any indication. It didn’t feel right just laying here, got him on edge if he focussed too much on lost time with the infinity stone.

So instead, he focussed on Tony. He watched him, face turned toward Stephen’s and mouth slightly parted, his breathing heavy and serene.

It sent a wave of terrible grief through him to see, feeling more helpless than ever about what was to come. He felt like he was drowning, like fate was an anvil tied to his leg pulling him under the surface, away from his life raft called Tony.

He had to turn onto his back as he took a deep breath, staring up at the ceiling as he had done so many nights before. The room was different, not their usual room in the sanctum but Tony’s bedroom in his new loft. It only showed how much things had changed since months before, when everything had just been sex, when Stephen didn’t hold any illusions that it could ever work out between them. That Tony would even want them to.

And now he had had a taste. He had known Tony’s love for real, the softness of his touch and Tony’s laughter against his lips. Had known a time where he could just reach out whenever he wanted and feel Tony underneath his fingertips.

Even staying away for two weeks had been torture, when he’d known Tony was alive, barely out of reach. He didn’t want to think about a life without him, a universe without his smile.

He was halfway out of the bed, hastily sitting up and shifting until he was sitting on the edge of the mattress, about to get up and get back to the library, to distance himself from Tony, when he could hear him groan quietly behind him.

His head snapped back towards Tony at once, trying to compose himself as he noticed the way his face was scrunched up. He frowned when Tony rolled onto his side, still asleep, as he seemed to curl into himself, breathing turning erratic and twitchy.

“My love,” he whispered, turning back and moving closer towards Tony. His hand moved up out of its own volition and he could feel the burning of Tony’s skin through his t-shirt where he was cupping his shoulder. He shook him carefully, trying to gently wake him and pull him back to reality, away from the terrors plaguing his sleep. It took a little more of Tony twitching against him, his movements getting more violent before his eyes finally snapped open with a gasp.

His wide eyes darted around, figuring out his surroundings as he tried to steady his breathing. Stephen lowered himself into the mattress once more, laying back down next to Tony as he tried to focus Tony’s attention on him.

“Stephen?” Tony asked, voice barely a whisper as his eyes found Stephen’s. Stephen’s stomach twisted at the sight, the leftover tendrils of fear and desperation clear in his lovers’ features.

He couldn’t help pulling Tony against him, sighing against his crown as Tony burrowed closer, feeling Tony’s breath of relief against him like it was his own.

“I’m here,” he whispered in the dark, relishing in the shiver that ran down Tony’s spine.

“Please don’t leave again.”

Stephen’s breath caught in his throat, his mind running a mile an hour, head spinning with panic, and yet he could feel his treacherous body melt under Tony’s touch.

He didn’t want to. He really didn’t.

“I- Tony, I don’t- I can’t,” Stephen breathed out eventually, once again aware of his own selfishness.

Tony had told him he loved him. Stephen had walked away leaving Tony to hurt just because he couldn’t …. because he couldn’t. He couldn’t let it in, couldn’t continue this for months to have it eventually taken from him.

He already loved Tony so much it hurt. Not long ago he had thought there was no way to fall even harder, but time and time again Tony had proven him wrong. Whenever Tony smirked at him, he fell another five feet, and every time Tony pressed a kiss to his cheek his feelings deepened.

How much worse would it get by the time Tony was taken from him?

And the worst part was that Tony deserved _everything_. He deserved to live the rest of his live free of pain, spend it with someone he loved and make every second count.

Stephen should have known better and put a stop to it sooner.

But again, he was selfish.

Tony pushed himself away from him, sitting up on the bed as he threw his shoulders back to stretch. “Get up. We’re not doing this here.”

“What?” Stephen frowned in confusion, moving to sit up as well as his hand subconsciously ended up on Tony’s lower back. Tony turned back to smile softly at him, but his eyes spoke of determination.

“If we keep lying here, I might fall asleep and give you an opportunity to escape again,” Tony’s smile deepened when Stephen rolled his eyes. And Stephen was _not _blushing sheepishly. Not that Tony could tell in the dark anyway, so it didn’t matter. “Come on, it’s almost morning anyway.”

Tony crawled out of bed, standing up and holding out his hand for Stephen. He hesitated only momentarily. It’s not like he had any other options really. Tony was right when he said he wouldn’t be able to leave as long as Tony was awake. There was always that part of him that got pulled towards Tony, like a compass arrow towards the north.

Like Tony was the sun and Stephen just a meagre planet orbiting around it, desperate for the light that kept him alive. Stephen was an addict to it, couldn’t say no. He’d always considered himself a disciplined man, able to tell himself when to stop messing around and get to work. There was no use saying no to Tony however, he couldn’t even get himself to try.

So, he took his hand, and because he could - and he was just that pathetic and needy - he linked his fingers with Tony’s.

Tony squeezed softly and led them through the hallway and into the kitchen. Stephen’s eyes immediately found the big windows overlooking the city. It was a completely different part of Manhattan, but nevertheless it reminded him of his old flat. He still often missed his old life - despite being perfectly happy where he was now (besides the world ending threats looming over his head) - and though he had realised after only a few months at Kamar-Taj with Mordo and Wong that he had actually hated the solitude of living alone in his ivory tower, he missed the view.

After only a few seconds however, his eyes were pulled back towards Tony as the older man had let go of his hand in favor of starting the coffee machine.

Sighing to himself, he leaned back against the kitchen island. He could feel the perks of having slept for more than three hours, feeling more alert and able to think more clearly. It was nice, but he still welcomed the idea of a cup of coffee to chase away the lingering bits of exhaustion creeping at the edges of his consciousness.

Tony handed him his coffee, and he took a sip, lowering the mug as soon as he realised Tony’s gaze was focussed on his face.

“Why ‘can’t’ you stay?” Tony’s eyes were piercing into his as he asked the question, and because he wanted to rely on Tony, and knew he would never be able to say it otherwise, he let himself drown in his chocolate eyes – black in the shadows of the night.

“I’m afraid.” His mouth formed the words, brain still focussed on the man in front of him, and a ripple of relief went through him at the admission. He let Tony’s face stave off the flashbacks of the future, the soft skin free of blood reminding him he was still here, still healthy and still within his reach.

He saw Tony swallow in front of him, gaze shifting away from him momentarily, allowing Stephen to catch his breath for a second.

“Well, so am I,” Tony huffed, eyes stern, but Stephen could see the confusion behind it, the insecurity that hid behind so many of Tony’s words. “Shouldn’t we deal with this together? Why does that translate to you ghosting me for two weeks. And yes, I just said ‘ghosting’ like we’re petty high schoolers.”

Stephen rolled his eyes at Tony, fighting off the tilt of his lips that was as natural as breathing around Tony. It was quickly gone as he took a deep breath, gritting his teeth as he moved to place his mug of coffee on the kitchen island behind him.

“Tony, I can’t- I’m terrified of losing you.” He took a moment to swallow down the emotions that were threatening to spill over to the surface, fighting them down as he tried to keep his face stern and neutral, feeling completely out of breath. “I don’t think I would survive that. Or rather I know I would, but I don’t want to.”

“Don’t you think I’m terrified of that as well?” Tony frowned, raising his voice the tiniest bit in frustration. “That you’ll kill yourself searching for a solution that might not be there?”

“That’s completely different!”

“How is that different?”

Because he was not destined to give his life for the universe.

“Tony, I know you.” Stephen stated matter-of-factly, his turn to fix Tony with a look. “You would jump into fire the second there was even the slightest _possibility _there is someone in the burning building. And for good measure you’d stay behind to die just in case.”

Tony was quiet for a second, fidgeting with his mug as he broke their eye contact to stare down at the floor instead. “That’s what Pepper said, when she broke up with me.”

“I didn’t know you and miss Potts were a thing?” Completely beside the point.

“Oh, hush your jealousy, Strange.” Stephen smirked slightly when he noticed the tiny smile pulling at Tony’s lips. He couldn’t help it, even during the most desperate of moments he just needed that bit of release, that tiniest spark of satisfaction coursing through him like a drug.

“Tony, she had a point. I don’t want you to give up being Iron Man or stop inventing but -,”

“But you just don’t know if you can stand with me. Yeah, yeah I know the drill.”

Stephen frowned slightly, frustration starting to build underneath his own skin. Tony hadn’t looked at him in a while, choosing the keep his gaze fixed on his chest instead.

“No, Tony, I would stand with you always, but this isn’t normal circumstances. Thanos is coming and wh- if you die… the chances are too high of that happening.” He breathed out through his nose, gritting his teeth to try and control the shiver of dread even saying the words sent through him. “And I know I can’t ask you to promise me not to kill yourself for the greater good so now I’m just here waiting for that to happen.”

Tony flinched slightly, sheepish grimace crawling up his face. “Sorry.”

Stephen sighed and rubbed his temples, and despite his better judgement, he pulled Tony’s mug out of his hands and put it next to his own mug on the kitchen island. A second later, he was pulling Tony forward, wrapping his arms around him as Tony gingerly did the same.

They stood there together for a moment, both thinking so loud it filled the silent space of the kitchen.

There were some moments Stephen wished he could use the timestone for, to have this moment loop into infinity instead of the countless deaths he’d experienced. It was almost enough for him to sympathise with Kaecilius, had to admit the appeal of immortality in Tony’s arms, free of worry for their inevitable demise. Either due to Thanos or the simplicity of time. 

“Please, just-,” Tony asked, breaking the moment by pulling away from him and fixing him with a glare. Stephen could feel his absence against him like a missing limb, a coldness running deeper than just skin and bone. “Let it be. You can keep an eye on what’s going on with … well with your eye… but… don’t let it destroy you. If our time is really limited wouldn’t you want to make the best of it?”

Stephen hated this. He hated that he knew. He hated that he couldn’t say no to Tony. Hated that he couldn’t just take his offer happily, oblivious to the heartbreak that was to follow, or in the very least that he cared little enough be able to walk away.

He should be able to deal with this as methodically as he had always dealt with his issues.

Shitty parents? Move away from home and get into med school. Feeling powerless and useless? Join a magical cult. The main factor of both being; hard work and years of study.

He should be able to study his way out of this mess. There must be a book somewhere that would tell him how to stop Thanos, a ritual that could keep everyone he cared about save or at the very least some kind of spell or potion to stop him from loving a man fated to be taken from him.

He just needed to keep his wits about him, needed to consider every piece and find a solution.

But everything about his relationship with Tony had been a miscalculation.

He’d always thought everything through - perhaps a little too much. He had toyed with Tony because he could, because he knew Tony would never act on it.

That seemed to have been his first mistake.

And even then, he’d thought it was okay, that it didn’t matter because Tony would never care.

But then he could see the emotion building in Tony’s eyes whenever he looked at him, the affection coming off Tony in waves, and as much as he’d told himself he would be able to keep it at bay, to not let _himself _be foolish enough to think it could ever work out… to try and pretend like it wasn’t real, like it was wishful thinking, a delusion or even a ploy for Tony to defeat his enemy…

Not even three weeks ago Tony had told him he loved him.

In other words, he’d been an idiot. He had let himself fall, had lost his sense enough to allow that to happen.

Perhaps he wasn’t as smart as he had liked to believe. Perhaps there really was no way to control the timeline. How could he control other people’s actions when he couldn’t even control his own?

Perhaps it was time to let go. To let blind hope take over, praying for everything to work out in the end.

With one hand on the wheel he could still steer.

“You know,” Tony started, making Stephen glance back at him. He hadn’t even been aware his gaze had drifted towards the windows. Tony was watching him, eyes still desperate but now with the tiniest speck of cheekiness. His hands moved to link behind his back as he took a step away from Stephen, making him frown in dismay. “We haven’t kissed in two weeks.”

Stephen barely managed to fight back the roll of his eyes, biting his tongue in annoyance. He had already made his decision, but Tony made him want to reconsider just to spite him. If Tony was bothered by his glare, he didn’t show it, only grinned wider, smugness clear in his features.

“Fine.” Stephen breathed out, “But all I can promise is that I won’t overdo it. I will still check this timeline for problems in the near future.”

Tony considered that offer, and Stephen knew the exact moment his actual hesitation turned to teasing. Stephen didn’t even give him a chance to prolong his game, only rolled his eyes and stepped forward to pull Tony’s lips against his own.

The smile against his lips made it all worth it, whatever pain was to follow.

Stephen happily parted his lips under Tony’s guidance, permitting Tony’s touch to loosen his shoulders and chase away the tension from his bones. Pulling at Tony’s shirt he allowed Tony to crowd him against the kitchen island, the scent of his cologne dimming Stephen’s senses until all that was left was him.

Tony’s hands found their way under the t-shirt he’d lent Stephen the previous morning, the skin-to-skin contact sending electricity up his spine as his own scarred hands desperately clutched at Tony’s back. He breathed Tony in, relishing in the taste against his lips, having missed the pressure of their kisses over the last few weeks.

Just when Tony started shifting his hips forward, making heat shoot down to his groin, the sound of crying filtered through the air, and it was so foreign a sound that Stephen immediately startled and snapped his head back, completely disorientated as he was so mercilessly pulled back to reality.

“Shit,” he heard Tony curse quietly in front of him as he took a step back and glanced hesitantly behind him towards the door to the hallway. “Sophia must have had a nightmare -…”

“It’s fine,” Stephen smiled, trying to breathe through the tension that was already creeping back onto his shoulders. “Go check with her. I should probably get back to work-,”

“Stephen,” Tony started, warning tone in his voice as he looked at him sceptically.

“Just to continue my studies,” Stephen soothed the engineer, “I’ll see you later today, I promise.”

“Alright,” Tony sighed, leaning forward on his toes to press a quick kiss against Stephen’s lips, a second later he had pulled back and was heading into the hallway.

Stephen breathed in deeply and listened for Tony’s voice coming from down the hall. As soon as he could hear Tony speak soothing words to the child, he took out his sling ring and created a portal back to Kamar-Taj.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The rumours are true folks, Stephen is in fact a big softie and a dumbass. 
> 
> Was fun to write from Stephen's POV again not going to lie. I missed it. Had to fight to make this chapter not too sweet though! couldn't have it be too out of character even though I just want them to stay in bed and cuddle all day 😬
> 
> Anyway I hoped you liked this chapter! 
> 
> Also if you're bored and looking to read ironstrange fics you might have missed go check out my bookmarks! there's some great stories in there to (re)read! It's not very extensive or up to date and there are definitely masterpieces that I forgot to add but it's a start!


	28. let it be

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little late but it's also a little longer than usual so I hope that makes up for it 😬

He hummed as he cleared up the dishes from lunch, rolling his eyes as he heard Peter and Harley argue about whatever they were amusing Sophia with. The last he’d seen of them they’d been setting up a tea party for Sophia’s stuffed animals, so he wasn’t quite sure he wanted to know what they were yelling about. 

It was amazing to hear the noise though, to have the sound of anyone, let alone his _children_, running through his home. It had never been impossible, of course, but as the years had pushed on, he’d found himself thinking it more and more unlikely. Of course, the teens weren’t actually _his_. Peter had a wonderful aunt who’d raised him, and Harley had a whole family back in Tennessee, yet it was easy to imagine.

Especially with how they acted like older siblings to Sophia, the little girl barely having been with him for three weeks yet already so attuned with his life. Whenever the teens got off from school they’d stop by the sanctum, using the portal in the hall to get to either his lab or apartment. 

Lately the default had become his apartment, as he’d been spending less and less time in the lab. He still made sure to make the necessary updates and advancements he wanted to complete, but instead of sticking around and messing with random tasks to pass the time, he found himself happy to spend some time on the couch watching movies with Sophia instead. 

This morning even, he’d gotten to the lab and hadn’t found anything to amuse himself with, leaving after barely fifteen minutes because he hadn’t felt like working. Instead he’d ended up baking cookies with Sophia and it had been exactly what he’d needed. 

It was a rare feeling, something he’d only felt once in a blue moon after taking on the Iron Man role. In a way, he missed the feeling of a new task, of starting up a new project he was excited about, but with everything going on, he hadn’t really allowed himself to work on projects purely for the hell of it. The latest project he’d worked on for his own benefit had already been completed, still laying unused in the lab, and whenever he thought of something new it was clouded by anxiety for the future, that need to fix the universe by writing the perfect line of coding. 

For once it didn’t push him to do more, to push himself to the brink in trying to perfect everything he did, instead halting his action, keeping him stuck and in need of distraction. Perhaps it was due to the knowledge that he couldn’t control everything anyway, that despite planning everything to a T, things could still go wrong and ruin everything they’d worked for.

It was both a freeing and terrifying thing. 

But like said, he wanted to focus on what was right in front of them, while still working towards the future – yes – but without the constant anxiety for something that might be as good as inevitable. 

It’s what his therapist had told him years ago, and it seemed silly that those same words would still be applicable this many years later, with all the new things that were troubling him. But really, his fears now were only a more real version of what they’d been after the Manhattan attack, like all that worrying was coming to a crescendo as the realisation of those fears was coming closer and closer. 

Tony wanted to have faith, wanted to trust that they would make it through. EDITH would be ready to be launched soon, and then he’d hopefully be able to sleep through the night. He’d have his armour around the world as he’d wanted ever since Wanda had showed him visions of galaxies far away gearing up to attack. 

As he finished wiping down the kitchen counters, he tried to figure out what to do next, feeling quite bored and listless. He didn’t want to think about the fights right now, past or future, so instead he let his mind wander back to that morning, to the joy of having Stephen against him once more, that perfect moment of peace he’d so desperately craved. 

When he had woken up from flashes of his parent’s crash combined with the Sokovia disaster, feeling completely disoriented and breathless, it had been a blessing to find Stephen next to him, to have the sorcerer pull him close and be able to breathe in that familiar sent of cedar and incense. 

Part of him had been surprised to see the sorcerer there, had sagged in relief that it hadn’t just been another dream. And in the dark of the morning it hadn’t been hard to believe everything would be alright. Stephen was there, and though Tony was sure not everything had been said, he’d finally started talking to him, opening up about what was bothering him and leaving a possibility for them to start working through everything together.

There was still that annoying part of him, keeping him on edge, worrying him about where they would stand when they saw each other next. Stephen had promised to see him later today, but Tony couldn’t help but worry about why he had left in the first place. 

It had been confusing lately; whenever he’d seen Stephen in the last month, their interactions had been almost wildly opposite each time, leaving Tony to wonder whether or not there would be kissing or fighting the next time he’d show up. 

And there was a new piece they hadn’t talked about yet.   
  
Sophia. 

He knew who he was committed to most, of course. Knew who was most dependent on him and who he would never willingly abandon. There were times where the little girl looked at him with eyes so bright that every piece of doubt about keeping her were burned from his mind. Even if at times he wondered whether it wouldn’t be best for her to just leave her with a responsible and loving family. To have May - and Happy now they’d gotten close – raise her into a wonderful teenager like Peter.

But she always clung to him with such determination and desperation whenever he left her for too long, that he knew he would never be able to let go of her. 

Which didn’t take away that he desperately hoped for Stephen to stay as well. That he hadn’t loved every minute he’d gotten to spent with Stephen that morning, that he hadn’t treasured the seconds he’d spend in Stephen’s arms. He had missed it, was missing it right now.

So, when Stephen stepped up behind him, the familiar scent wrapping around him like so many times before, his first thought was that he was imagining it. It was calming, and Tony breathed it in like an addict, closing his eyes and leaning into the sorcerer’s warmth. The sultry chuckle rippled through his body like a wave, sending shivers down his spine and into his toes, banishing all thoughts and worries from his mind.

Nothing could ground him like Stephen did, while at the same time lifting him up and away from everything that was bothering him. 

The ghost of lips brushed over his neck, phantom touches pulling a smile to his face before the sorcerer had even laid a hand on him. 

“Missed you,” he hummed, unable to keep his thoughts to himself and gripping the towel in his hand to steady him, trying not to drift away completely in Stephen’s presence, even though there was no reason to hold back; Stephen was his to enjoy again, to use as his own personal comfort blanket if he so pleased. 

When he reached an arm behind him, expecting to feel the thick fabric of the robes, he only felt soft cotton. It wasn’t unusual for Stephen to be in casual clothes around him, but only ever in the sanctum, their home, so Tony hoped at least that was a good sign, that he’d already started to consider Tony’s new space as theirs. Tony’s content only strengthened, turning around to take in his favourite sight. 

He always loved seeing Stephen in his t-shirts - Tony doubted he had any of his own, had burned them as soon as Tony’s came available to him - and of course there was the added benefit of more of his skin being exposed. The t-shirts were always a little too loose, always fell a little too short, and Tony loved it. Loved how it so clearly marked them as ‘not Stephen’s’, made it clear that the sorcerer belonged to someone, belonged to him. 

“Hi,” he smiled up at Stephen, placing a comforting hand on the doctor’s bicep as he felt the hesitation in his stance. 

“Hey,” Stephen answered slyly, voice low, but a sincere smile still started pulling at his lips. “Can I steal you for a few hours?”

“Why?” Tony grinned, raising his eyebrow with a wink. “Taking me on a hot date?”

Stephen snorted slightly, a domestic sound that had Tony’s toes curling. “Depends on what you find hot, I guess. I just thought it would be nice to spar again. Get some exercise, you know, get the blood pumping.”

“Oh, doctor,” Tony smiled sweetly, leaning in closer to Stephen as he breathed in deeply. “You just want an excuse to toss me around again.”

“Perhaps.” Stephen surprised Tony by leaning forward easily, pressing a kiss to his temple as habitual as breathing, before taking a step back and pushing Tony towards the hallway. “Get changed.”

Tony was reeling as he did as instructed, heart beating in delight as the touch warmed him to his fingertips, washing over him like a warm shower. 

* * *

As Stephen watched Tony leave into the hallway, his smile faltered slightly as he leaned against one of the kitchen counters. He wanted to indulge Tony’s fantasy of having nothing to worry about, continuing the normality of their lives even if everything was spiralling towards disaster.

But it was hard.

It’s not like he didn’t enjoy spending time with Tony like this, having him close and smiling at him like everything would be okay, but he still couldn’t rid of that ball of dread in the pit of his stomach. 

Yet, staying away and trying to get over him clearly hadn’t worked either.

“So, did you find a solution?”

Stephen turned to find Harley standing in the doorway leading to the living room, watching Stephen with sceptical hope. He only raised his eyebrow in question. 

While he’d spent some time with Peter now, he’d been alone with Harley yet. He’d seen the teen before, had spent quite some time watching his and Tony’s facecalls back when all he had was a fantasy of their relationship, yet all of those moments had been Harley around the engineer. 

This version of him looked different, slightly more mischievous and clearly fiercely protective. 

“I heard you. You said there would be no point making up with Tony if you didn’t find a solution first. So, did you?”

“Do you often listen in on private conversations?” 

Harley definitely wasn’t pleased by his avoidance, as his frown deepened, and he crossed his arms in front of his chest. Stephen sighed, trying to find a good answer.

He had no problem lying to the teen and saying everything would be fine. It’s what Tony would want after all, to not worry the teens unnecessarily. It would also be completely harmless. It’s not like they would be able to do anything to stop whatever might happen, after all, and if in the end something would happen and his lie would come out, then well… he didn’t really care whether or not the teen hated him for the rest of his life. He would probably hate himself too. 

He still couldn’t quite bring himself to say the words however, as if speaking them out loud would curse it completely, so instead he forced out a truthful non-answer. “I can’t tell you.”

“That’s bullshit.”

“Is it?” Stephen raised an eyebrow at the teen, feeling himself start the smile slightly at the kid’s defiance despite the conversation topic being less than ideal. “The future is so fragile and undetermined, you _sneezing_ at the wrong time could shift everything. So, the simplest of answers is that I don’t know yet. Nothing is set in stone.”

He watched as Harley pursed his lips, glaring down at the floor, arms still wrapped around himself. It seemed less defensive now, more like he was trying to comfort and steady himself. Stephen felt for the kid; he knew what it was like to love Tony, to have to live with past loss and trust issues forced on you by your parents. His own had kicked him out as soon as they’d learned of his sexuality, because he’d become a disappointment, Harley’s dad hadn’t even stuck around long enough to make that judgement. “Then why aren’t you still looking for a way?”

“I _am_,” Stephen had to fight not to snap as his own anxiety started to get the best of him, despite his sympathy, and he sighed to relieve the stress in his body. “As far as I can tell now, there’s nothing bad going to happen in the next 48 hours, so if that means I can make Tony happy by taking a break and spending some time with him, I will.”

Harley looked like he wanted to say something else – maybe disagree with his statement – but eventually he just gritted his teeth and mumbled a ‘fine’, before turning and heading back into the living room. 

Stephen managed to shake the anxiety off of him by the time Tony came back dressed in workout clothes, and the sight of him did make everything just the tiniest bit better. 

* * *

Stephen portalled them to the Kamar-Taj training area, and excitement started coursing through Tony at the sight. His body was screaming for the exercise, adrenaline already starting to pump through his veins as he stepped towards the training mats. The last time they’d trained it had been outside, but it was night in Kamar-Taj now, and this way they would be less of a bother to the other sorcerers. 

Though never having been in this particular hall, it already felt familiar. Most of Kamar-Taj looked much the same, low vaulted ceilings and old stone, dimly lit and smelling distinctly of incense and tea leaves. It always reminded him of Stephen, though it lacked that ping of musk that was so specific to his doctor. 

One thing that was making a reappearance was Stephen’s training robes, and Tony took an appreciative glance once Stephen had changed into them. Stephen sent him a knowing smirk, and Tony grinned as he made a show of licking his lips.

The sorcerer only sent him an unimpressed eyebrow raise, but Tony wasn’t fooled or dissuaded. 

Instead he moved towards the middle of the room, turning back to face Stephen with a smirk, opening his arms wide in a clear invitation. 

Stephen didn’t waste a second, charging at him at once, before disappearing into thin air at the very last second. Tony, who had prepared himself for the impact, stumbled at the force that didn’t come, huffing in annoyance. A tap at his shoulder made him turn around, and he was greeted by a mischievous smile before his feet were taken out from underneath him.

“Auch,” Tony groaned, sighing as he stared up at the ceiling and annoyed at the quick end of their first fight. “If you wanted me on my back you could have just asked.”

“I want you to stay on your feet.” Stephen thrummed from where he was stalking in a circle around him, magic twirling between his fingertips. “That’s the goal after all.”

“Fine.” Tony crawled back up to his feet, facing Stephen with a challenge. “But no magic this time.”

“No.”

“Come on, doc!” Tony smirked, shaking his shoulders loose in excitement. It had been way too long since he’d actually _sparred_ with anyone. 

He’d always loved boxing with Happy, though they’d barely gotten the time since he started working for Pepper, and the last time he’d sparred with Stephen seemed like ages ago. Even then he’d used his suit, and though he’d hopefully always have that to rely on in a real fight, for now he _needed_ that extra bit of strain on his body. He craved that rush, that feeling of his skin burning out every piece of tension from his body. “It’s only fair! Show me what those yoga muscles can do!”

Stephen barely raised an eyebrow, not even acknowledging his quip. The lack of response was starting to annoy him now, and he shook his shoulders again, this time to get rid of the frustration build-up. “Then how will you learn to fight against threats that are more powerful than you?”

“Are you saying you’re no match for me without magic?” Tony teased, wiggling his eyebrows as he puffed his chest, not throwing in the towel quite yet. “Already admitting defeat, doc?”

Stephen rolled his eyes, making Tony’s grin widen. 

He couldn’t help it; Stephen rolling his eyes was as close to losing control over his mask of indifference as he would probably ever get. Even when actually opening up to Tony he still always seemed to have a stubborn hold on his emotions, the closest Tony had ever gotten to Stephen fully letting go being the previous morning, when Tony had cornered him in the sanctum and forced him to talk. 

He had no problem recognising the affection Stephen felt for him, had known for months, and felt it in everything he did. For months it had been hidden in non-action, in his possessiveness and protective streak, and eventually it had filtered through into their conversations. He’d felt it when Tony finally realised the way Stephen looked at him, when he restored JARVIS for him, and whenever he held him close. Tony knew. He wasn’t an idiot. There wasn’t a moment where he didn’t feel loved by the sorcerer, even if only recently the gestures had started showing explicitly and with purpose. 

Yet his upset outburst had probably been the realest, most vulnerable side of Stephen he’d ever gotten to see. He genuinely hoped eventually he’d get the chance to see more of it, but Tony realised that it was an extenuating circumstance. He could feel Stephen holding back at times, thinking over his words carefully whenever he spoke, but with everything going on he could understand Stephen wanting to exercise control over the parts of his life that he could. 

So, whenever Stephen rolled his eyes, Tony couldn’t help but feel the tiniest spark of accomplishment. 

“I have no problem admitting that I’m not as skilled in hand-to-hand as you are.”

“Alright,” Tony shrugged, tightening the wraps around his hands, “then _you_ get to learn something today.”

That eyeroll again. Tony stepped forward, grabbing Stephen by the neck and pressing his lips against Stephen’s. He was mainly doing it to mess with him, yet his own body still sang at the contact, feeling the doctor’s warm skin against his and tasting him on his lips. He could feel the sorcerer go limp against him at once, and Tony licked Stephen’s lower lip for good measure before pushing back with a smirk. He had to fight to not just lean into him further and continue what he’d started, but he knew he’d won, and at the moment he craved the non-sexual physical activity more. They could always have their fun later. 

There was no hiding the faint blush on Stephen’s pale cheeks, and even though Stephen looked like he was already regretting his consent, he let up with a curt ‘fine’.

It had clearly been the right choice as they wrestled until they were lying in a heap on the floor, catching their breaths with smiles on their faces, worries completely forgotten. Tony’s muscles were screaming pleasantly, and his heart was beating healthily. 

Stephen was lying on his back, breathing heavily and smiling wider than ever. Tony revelled in it as he lay halfway sprawled over his side, leg still somewhere near Stephen’s shoulder. Stephen grunted as Tony shifted on top of him, probably due to Tony’s elbow digging into his ribs. It only made Tony smile more as he made himself more comfortable, his head resting on Stephen’s stomach. 

They lay in silence for a while, just basking in the comfort of each other’s presence. Tony was aware of every point of contact between them, loving the warmth coming off the sorcerer and burning him to the bone. 

“I heard you’ve been working with Wanda?” Stephen was the one to eventually break the silence, and Tony tilted his head to be able to look at him. The sorcerer was watching him carefully, probably searching for an ounce of discomfort at the mention of the witch’s name. 

He’d had some time to wonder about Wanda, of course. He hadn’t seen her yet, not knowing whether it was because she was avoiding him again or simply that he’d left the lab before she’d arrived. Tony wasn’t sure what option he was hoping for. He really didn’t … well, he wasn’t angry at her, just not quite comfortable with however this could play out, nervous about whatever reaction he’d set in motion.

“Yeah, I wanted to ask you about that, actually,” Tony answered, focussing on the project instead, smiling at the sorcerer to reassure him, “We’re stuck at getting the bots to activate the magic infused in them. Any thoughts on how to proceed?”

Stephen hummed, glancing away from Tony to look up at the ceiling in thought. Tony watched the way his face scrunched up while thinking and Stephen’s hands moved to start carding through Tony’s hair. “I can’t think of anything at the moment. But I can come take a look at your notes tomorrow.”

“That would be great.”

“Euhm, guys,…,” 

Tony’s head snapped towards Peter in the doorway, holding Sophia’s hand as she was looking around in curiosity. Peter himself was watching the both of them with an apologetic expression, waving at Stephen in greeting. 

“What’s wrong, Pete?”

“Nothing, just… May expects us home soon so…,”

“Yes of course,” Tony shook his head, sitting up straighter. He sent an uncertain glance toward Stephen, but the sorcerer was still lying on his back, absentmindedly watching the proceedings. His face still held the remnants of a smile, however, so Tony just relaxed his shoulders and shook his head again. “Of course! Don’t miss curfew and say hi to May for me.”

“Okay,” Peter sighed nervously, letting go of Sophia’s hand. Sophia immediately ran towards Tony, barrelling against him. Tony rolled backwards a bit with the force of her impact, and despite the nerves twisting in his stomach, he couldn’t help but smile as he fell back against Stephen’s stomach. 

Peter left when he saw Sophia was safely with Tony, and as she curled into his side, head resting against his shoulder, she looked towards Stephen. “Who’s that?”

“That’s Stephen, my-,” he didn’t quite yet dare look towards Stephen himself but hesitated only momentarily before continuing. “My boyfriend.”

“What are you doing?”

“We’re just resting.” Tony replied, tugging a loose strand of hair behind her ear.

“Like a nap?”

“Kind of,” Tony smiled, glancing back towards Stephen who was watching him with soft eyes. “Except we can lay here and still talk to each other.”

“Okay.”

“Okay.”

Sophia immediately started talking about what she’d done with Harley and Peter earlier, voice low and timid, and it wasn’t long before Tony felt Stephen’s fingers in his hair again. It made him smile, the soft reminder that Stephen was still here, and it reassured him a bit, giving him more confidence in the sorcerer staying, in the dream of them one day being a little family. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The comments on the previous chapter were some of the sweetest yet! Thank you! they mean the world to me always!


	29. helping hands

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sure it's still Wednesday somewhere in the world. 
> 
> Little disclaimer since I'm noticing a lot of mistakes after rereading some of my things: I'm not a native English speaker, so if there are some unspoken grammar rules I'm missing I'm sorry. 
> 
> Even in my native language I also tend to write what I hear. For example, I'll be thinking a sentence with the word taught and I know it has to be 'taught' and not 'thought' but because I use 'thought' more often and it sounds alike I'll sometimes just end up writing that. Also even weirder things like writing know instead of just no. I usually catch that when I'm fixing my drafts but if I look right over it my apologies!
> 
> If you notice certain things I tend to do wrong regularly please let me know! Recently someone commented that 'income hall' is not actually a synonym for 'entrance hall' in English which I'd been doing wrong for probably years actually. So please inform me so I don't continue making a fool of myself 😂
> 
> Thank you and I hope you enjoy this - once again quite long - chapter!

“I want to help!” Sophia shouted up at him as she clung to his leg, hand already reaching up to grab one of the vegetables he was trying to cut. She could barely reach the countertop with her hand, but that didn’t seem to slow her dedication. 

“Phia,” Tony started, pushing the knives farther away from the edge, “you can’t help me with this. It’s dangerous.”

“I want to help!” She repeated, frowning in frustration. Tony looked down to find her lip trembling, and her eyes already filling with tears. It was his fault for caving and allowing her to skip her nap earlier; the girl now tired and more easily upset. She’d been too excited, however, and Tony had realized he was yet to learn to say no to her. 

This, he had no problem with denying her, however, as he wasn’t stupid. He didn’t have to be a parent to realize knives and four-year-olds don’t mix. Now, it seemed like he might have to deal with a tantrum, though, and he could feel himself start to panic as he realized he had no idea how to do that. 

He really didn’t want to have to raise his voice; her intentions were merely to be useful and feel included, and if she’d get upset and start crying and screaming and-

“I could use your help, miss Sophia.” Tony glanced back at Stephen in surprise. The sorcerer had been sitting at the kitchen table reviewing Tony and Wanda’s notes from EDITH, but was now calmly looking up at Sophia. 

He was glad the sorcerer had spent the night again after their sparring the previous day, and though once again, he’d spent the morning at Kamar-Taj to study - and undoubtedly check up on the timelines - he’d shown up later in the day as promised. 

Sophia barely spared him a glance, still focussed on trying to figure out how to reach the countertop. “I want to help _Tony!_”

“Just as well, probably,” Stephen replied casually, glancing back down at his book as he turned the page. “I need someone really clever to help me, after all.”

“I’m clever,” Sophia turned to look at him hesitantly, mouth scrunched into a pout, and Tony could see Stephen had won her interest. He stayed quiet, waiting for it to play out as he glanced back at Stephen.

It’s not like he’d expected Stephen to be bad with children. They had never really discussed - well, anything about their relationship, really, besides the fact that they had one - so he had no idea what the sorcerer’s stance on kids was. With the fact that he’d joined an arcane group of sorcerers generally considered to be supervillains, Tony had made his assumptions, though. 

Besides, Stephen had been upset with him for saving her and most likely considered her survival the reason the earth was probably doomed. So, yes, Tony had been nervous about them meeting. 

So far, they seemed to be doing fine, however. Stephen mainly stuck to the background, which Tony didn’t mind as long as he got to have the sorcerer around, and he did answer politely to questions when asked. 

This was definitely a side of Stephen he hadn’t seen before. 

“You sure?” Stephen asked, raising an eyebrow as he glanced back up from his book to catch Sophia’s eyes. The little girl frowned and nodded her head in determination, ready to prove herself. Stephen seemed to consider the child, Sophia puffing her chest and standing taller with his judgment on her, before he nodded and pulled out the chair next to him, indicating Sophia to take a seat. 

Sophia seemed excited at the chance she’d been given and immediately ran over to crawl onto the chair. Tony sighed in relief when a good look at her face showed it free of tears, though there was still a tired sadness present. 

Stephen pushed his books and notes asides, summoned another book and pen, and placed it in front of him. He opened it to a random page, pointing at it and telling Sophia how he was stuck. 

Tony had to hide his grin behind his hand as he noticed he’d summoned a book of puzzles for children, the stress and earlier panic about Sophia’s possible tantrum fading away slowly but steadily. 

Still smiling, Tony turned back to his own task of cutting the vegetables for dinner, listening to Stephen and Sophia’s chatter in the background. 

When he looked back up a little while later, it was to find Stephen watching Sophia in something akin to panic as she kept leaning closer to get a better look at the page, until eventually, she was sitting in his lap. 

She seemed completely at ease there as she continued the puzzle, and Tony smiled as Stephen’s initial terror turned to wonder and eventual acceptance as he continued talking to her, tension easing from his shoulders. 

Tony had to look away if he’d ever want to get dinner done, but by the time it was ready, his heart had grown ten sizes.

He loved how encouraging Stephen had been to Sophia, constantly praising her for finishing puzzles or even finding a single number, asking her to explain because he ‘didn’t get it.’ It filled him with warmth, and through it all, Sophia’s smile had returned fully, eyes full of glee as she proudly exclaimed to Tony that she’d found another seven!

In the end, the new challenge was to get her to put the book down long enough to eat, but she relented when Tony told her she could continue after dinner. Tony took a seat next to Stephen, and the sorcerer glanced up at him curiously when Tony took his hand and pressed a kiss to it. 

He couldn’t help it. He loved his hands, and he loved Stephen, and at this moment, everything was just perfect.

* * *

He’d just finished putting Sophia to bed when he stopped in the living room doorway. Stephen was sitting on the couch, carefully holding one of Sophia’s stuffed animals. He seemed completely absent, mind miles away as he stared at it, face pulled into a delicate frown. 

Tony continued watching him, his heart full of love. 

It was truly unbelievable that the universe would grant him someone like Stephen. Someone caring and loving yet so fiercely protective, who stood up for him against anyone who tried to tear him down. Tony knew for a fact he’d never gotten to this point of happiness in his life if it hadn’t been for Stephen. 

Stephen had been the first person in a long time to tell him he mattered. 

Yes, Rhodey and Pepper had tried to convince him of that very thing, but their love was such a constant and so natural after the years of knowing him that it hadn’t registered anymore. They’d been with him for decades, and Tony knew they would continue to stick by him no matter what, but Stephen had been the first person to look at who Tony was now, had judged him for his actions since becoming Iron Man, and had decided that yes, he was in fact worthy of love. Of appreciation. Of basic human decency. 

Not despite his faults, but because of them. 

It’s due to Stephen that he’d realized his self-worth again, that he’d gotten out of a situation that was only making him miserable. 

And through all of it, Tony was learning to value the good moments, to be hopeful for the future, or at least not spent too much time worrying about it. 

Tony took a step forward, smiling as the movement caused Stephen to snap out of his thoughts, the sorcerer looking up to meet his eyes. 

“Are you okay?” he asked softly as he reached the doctor, Stephen tilting his head so he could keep meeting his gaze. 

Stephen sighed, holding his eyes for another second before dropping them back to the toy. “There’s so much to lose.”

“Hey,” Tony used his finger to tilt Stephen’s chin up again, leaning in closer to plant a soft kiss on his lips. “We’ll figure it out.”

Part of him really believed in his words, while the other just didn't want to lose it any sooner than he had to. He did have hope, and to him, that was most important at the end of the day. It’s what kept him going, what kept him able to fight back and prepare, and what gave him the best chance at accomplishing his goal. 

When Tony moved to pull back, Stephen’s arms wrapped around him, pulling him closer against him until Tony could do nothing but straddle the sorcerer’s lap. He didn’t mind, smiling back at Stephen, carding his hands through Stephen’s hair. “I love you.”

Tony watched as Stephen swallowed, nodding in response as he leaned forward to initiate another kiss. 

* * *

“So, you think we should focus more on-,”

“On connecting the different pieces, so they act as one, yes,” Stephen finished for him. They were sitting on a stone bench in the Kamar-Taj garden, reviewing EDITH’s plans. 

It was a gorgeous day out in Nepal, the trees' colors a combination of dark green, white, and pink, flowers blooming all around, and a combination of smells from the different herb patches filling the air. The weather was lovely, as the teens had pointed out when pitching the idea to spend the day outside. They’d even brought a soccer ball, which they were kicking around with Sophia on the grass a little further away from Stephen and Tony. The cloak had also been introduced to the young girl, and Sophia absolutely loved it, having it chase her around and even playing hide-and-seek. 

Only when the teens had suggested, it had Tony realized he hadn’t really been out in fresh air in a while. It was certainly nice…. Especially as he’d get to sit close to Stephen and listen to his boyfriend’s gorgeous mind at work. 

“That way, any sorcerer could activate the one closest to them from Earth, and everything else would follow like a chain reaction.”

Tony frowned. It was definitely the best solution they’d found, but that didn’t quite mean it was perfect. “We can’t just have any sorcerer be able to activate it, however. Yes, it’s only the shield function, but I still don’t quite trust anyone with that kind of control…”

“We’ll make it specific,” Stephen easily adjusted, turning to face Tony. His eyes were serious, focused fully on the task at hand, face all hard lines, and perfectly cut cheekbones. Tony had to pull himself back to attention. He was usually good at focusing on things he cared about, but it seemed Stephen was more interesting than science in even the worst of days. “Though it’s not a brilliant idea to have only one person able to activate it.”

Now, the sun was burning down on them, highlighting Stephen’s features and making his pale skin shine like a beacon begging Tony to focus on him. His blue eyes had already lost most color, settling on a mesmerizing grey as they centered on the pages in his hands. 

“Tony?”

“I’m not giving up power again,” Tony easily hid his distraction, though clearly, Stephen had caught on, eyes softening as they met Tony’s with an amused tilt of his lips. “Didn’t end well last time, and that had been a machine I created. I can’t trust someone I don’t know; hell, even the people closest to me can have their own agenda.”

Stephen didn’t argue, though he locked eyes with him, calculating gaze fixed on his face. Tony didn’t let up. “_You_ want to learn magic, then?

Tony’s eyes widened in surprise, letting the thought run through his head as he forced out a reluctant ‘no.’

He really didn’t. Despite having grown comfortable around it and having learned to use its advantages… he didn’t want it messing around in him any more than it had to. Besides, it would take too much time, and Tony was quite sure the levels of magic required would take years to build. He already knew what he wanted, however, so he mainly glanced back up at Stephen. “But you can do it.”

“And what if something happened to -,”

“Do not finish that sentence. Nothing will happen.” Tony argued resolutely, not allowing any room for Stephen to go against that statement. 

Stephen sighed, closing his eyes for a second before nodding in agreement. “No, it won’t… But there might be other ways I’m predisposed and can’t do it…”

“I can do it.”

Tony looked up and away from Stephen, finding Wanda standing a few steps away. She was wearing her old leather suit, hair falling in loose waves over her shoulders. The last time he’d seen her wear, it had been an Avengers meeting months - well, actually it had almost been two years by now. It was a little jarring seeing the actual _Scarlet Witch_ again instead of ‘just’ Wanda, but he couldn’t blame her for holding on to it. 

It looked great on her after all, and after getting used to a specific gimmick, it’s hard to lose affection for it. 

Stephen was watching her wearily, very clearly seizing her up as a threat to Tony. He always loved it when Stephen’s protective streak made an appearance, which hadn’t really happened since he’d left the Avengers. It was nice to see it again though - if not extremely attractive - but he merely grabbed Stephen’s hand in reassurance. 

“I know you don’t trust me, which is totally fine,” Wanda sighed, “but I have been working on this with you for the last few weeks.”

“Tony!” He glanced away from Wanda as Sophia came running towards them, cheeks flushed from the exertion of playing outside and cloak chasing after her. “Come play with us!”

“Hi, Wanda,” she directed at the witch once she noticed her presence. Wanda smiled back down and greeted her pleasantly in turn, an amused smile on her face. 

“I need to talk to Wanda for a minute, but Stephen can play with you?” 

“Okay!”

Tony watched with a soft roll of his eyes as Stephen fixed Wanda with a glare, refusing to move. Lightly squeezing the sorcerer’s hand, he managed to get Stephen to look back at him, even if reluctantly. He sent Stephen an encouraging smile, letting him know that he’d be okay and had nothing to be angry about.

“Please, Stephen?” Sophia begged, tugging at his arm. Tony’s heart jumped pleasantly as Stephen sighed before nodding in agreement, getting up from his seat as he allowed the excited child to pull him back towards the teens. A second later, Tony felt the Cloak wrap around his shoulders, hugging his shoulders tightly and protectively. Tony rolled his eyes, catching Stephen’s from a little farther away. The sorcerer only shrugged at him, however, before turning back to Sophia. 

Tony sighed as he watched him go, petting the cloak softly as he let the sight of Stephen with the kids calm him before turning back to face the witch. 

Once his attention was back on her, Wanda sighed, taking a seat on his left. “I’m sorry. What I said… I didn’t quite mean it like that.” 

Wanda took a deep breath, making sure to lock eyes with him as she continued. “I’m sorry. That was a very simplified version of exactly how I changed and realized I was wrong. 

And I did realize my mistake in blaming you in the first place.”

“That’s -” Tony started, feeling a flare of annoyance in the back of his head. He didn’t care about his own feelings in the matter, didn’t even care what Wanda thought of him. 

“I know that wasn’t the issue,” Wanda interrupted apologetically, making Tony look back up at her considering. 

“When I first saw you in Sokovia … I had tunnel vision. All I could think about was that shell with ‘Stark’ written on it, and I couldn’t see past my own hurt, fear, and anger to see the bigger picture. It was easier to focus on the anger, and specifically on the person that anger was fixated on – and I do know that shouldn’t have been you.”

“I’m not trying to deny that I am responsible for what happened to you, Wanda.” Tony sighed, suddenly feeling exhausted despite his earlier excitement. He knew he’d made mistakes, knew he was the reason Stane could abuse his power. After all, he’d given it to him because he hadn’t bothered taking up the simple responsibility of making sure his father’s legacy kept the little purity and morality it had. 

“And I’m not trying to find an excuse for what I did,” Wanda countered, voice calm and controlled. She seemed to be breathing through her words, accent slipping away as she carefully chose her words, “At least, not anymore.”

“Do you know what the Ancient One showed me when I just got to Kamar-Taj?” She paused a minute, looking at Tony expectantly, who only raised a questioning eyebrow at her. “She showed me that I didn’t only destroy an entire city and killed most of its inhabitants… But also that the Sokovia disaster - something I caused - was the event that set our timeline on the path to Thanos.”

Tony remembered Stephen telling him something like that… It must have been somewhere at the beginning of their affair. He hadn’t paid it much attention, knowing that if what she’d said was true, then he’d also had a part in it. She may have messed with his mind, but she hadn’t forced him to mess with science he couldn’t control. 

“Don’t,” Wanda cut through his thoughts, causing him to look back up at her, “It was all me. I knew fear would control you. And before you worry about me reading your mind, I didn’t have to; it’s written all over your face.”

“So, what’s your point?” Tony sighed, shaking his thoughts out of his head and trying to move the conversation away from his own guilt. 

“My point is that it was crushing knowledge!” Wanda was starting to get fired up now, bitterness enriching her accent, “Back with the Avengers… they were willing to pretend like nothing had happened like _I specifically_ didn’t cause thousands of deaths. It was so easy to go along with it, to deny responsibility or let my anger overcloud my guilt.”

Tony didn’t really understand. His anger was usually _caused _by his guilt and aimed at himself, so using it as a cover would never work for him. 

Even with the Avengers, when he’d spent the last few months building up frustration and hatred, it had been directed at himself – much to his therapist’s annoyance. Luckily, he’d learned some healthy coping mechanisms - like fucking it out on Stephen - but he guessed being stuck in a dungeon didn’t leave much space for physical activity or building relationships. 

But if he looked further into his past, he understood holding on to anger to avoid feeling loss. He’d spent years upset with Howard because he’d thought he’d been the cause of their accident, and once again, angry at himself for not saying goodbye properly. 

“I couldn’t stay angry forever, though, and I _needed_ to admit to my mistakes, to take responsibility for all the people I’ve hurt. The anger had to fall away to face my actions and realize how much worse it truly was.” Wanda sighed, turning to face him. “You try and imagine what all that guilt could do to you.”

Tony was well versed in guilt. To him, it usually meant forcing himself to go harder, pushing himself to the brink to try and fix his faults, but he also knew that guilt could be debilitating. That it could keep you in bed for weeks or force you to drink until you couldn’t remember what you’d done. That guilt could make you feel like a miserable existence was all you deserved. “So, how are you still standing?”

“I learned to deal with it. To accept it and learn to believe that my mistakes don’t define me,” Wanda shrugged, “That I was dumb and young, and stupid, and I didn’t _want_ for any of it to happen. That I didn’t want anyone to die… well maybe I wanted you to die, to self-destruct, … but anyway.” 

Tony rolled his eyes as she drifted off. At least she admitted to it. 

She smiled apologetically at him and shrugged. “I have to believe that because otherwise, I’d just let myself waste away in a dungeon. Does that make sense?”

“I guess so,” Tony took pity on her, despite not quite agreeing. Stephen had told him the exact same thing months ago. That your mistakes don’t define you, but your intentions do. He’d always found it a little naive, a bit too simplistic for the state of the world. But he didn’t exist to play judge and executioner. 

And more important than anything she’d said was the sincerity of it. He could feel it in the air, and with Stephen still watching the both of them like a hawk, he doubted she’d be able to mess with his mind. Even the Cloak around his shoulders seemed to have relaxed more. “Intentions matter, right?”

Wanda smiled as her gaze shifted away from him, staring off in the distance. “That’s actually something the Ancient One taught me before she passed; If things keep blowing up around you, you have to belief intentions matter because otherwise, all you can do is stew in your own guilt, and the world would be all the worse for it.”

They sat in silence for a while, Tony watching Peter and Harley absolutely destroy Stephen and Sophia in a game of soccer, while Wanda continued reminiscing about her late mentor. 

“Look,” she finally spoke up again. When he looked back at her, he found her eyes full of determination, combing a hand through her hair to keep it out of her face. Her features were hard now, eyes dark and voice steadier than ever. “I’m not trying to be a good guy. I’m not trying to pretend like what I did wasn’t horrible and unforgivable. I know thousands of people died and that I hurt millions more. I just stopped caring what people think about it. I’m a terrible human being – fine. If that means I can do horrible things to keep this universe from being destroyed, even better. It’s quite the privilege actually, to have been judged already, to not worry about heaven or hell because you already know the answer.”

“Even if I trust what you’re saying and I agreed with you… I don’t know if I could trust you with EDITH.” Tony frowned. He wouldn’t even really feel confident letting Wong or Mordo have that kind of control, though he realized he’d have to have them at least be able to control it. They were the best choices he had, after all, and they really couldn’t risk having only a select group of people know the spell needed to activate the shield. 

“That’s fine.” Wanda shrugged, “I just wanted to be honest. You can have Stephen put restrictions on my magic so that I will only be able to perform the spell with the right intentions.”

Tony raised his eyebrows at her. That was quite smart actually, and if that really was something Stephen could do, then he’d already feel a lot more at ease. He couldn’t help but roll his eyes at her in annoyance, though, but just like Wanda, he was holding back a smile, “Couldn’t you have just led with that?”

“Didn’t I gain at least a little bit of your trust?”

“I guess so.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm very aware Wanda is controversial in this fandom. I personally love her character design so even if I don't vibe with MCU Wanda I can't help being gay for Scarlet Witch 😬
> 
> Thank you so much for the wonderful comments I received on the previous chapter! You're all making me so much happier and reestablishing my confidence in this fic! 💕


	30. To A Wild Rose

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I wrote the first draft of this chapter and hated it, which is why I skipped a week.  
Then I managed to salvage it and actually really liked the end result so I posted it yesterday.
> 
> Except then three hours later I randomly panicked.  
Not really a reason but I ended up deleting the posts anyway because I had to sleep and wanted to think over it again with a clear mind.
> 
> I ended up changing only the last 200 words, so if you've already read it, no sweat. you don't have to read it again because the part I panicked about has literally zero significance to the story. Though I would love to know what your thoughts were on the original version.
> 
> I don't know, I just really want this pic to be good and I was worried it didn't fit right even though it's literally just the closing of a chapter.
> 
> Anyway don't worry about it, I just wanted to explain and apologise for any confusion caused!
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter!

Tony had finished EDITH weeks ago, but today they had finally finished the magic and spells needed to form the shield function. He had considered using a combination of nano tech and holograms to form a protective shield, but that would take too long to figure out, and Tony had to admit he trusted the magic to be sturdier and withhold more force.

Technology was different on every planet, but the magic that flowed throughout the universe was… well, universal. He hoped it would be stronger than the technology of their enemies, but he had no idea what to go off.

Chitauri weapons had been sturdier than earth’s, had drawn on energy that earth hadn’t yet mastered to full capacity and despite their simplistic designs had been quite effective at hurting a lot of opponents at once.

Yet it had been so chaotic and unfair that it was hard to figure out where they truly stood, how far behind they really were. With their sheer numbers alone they should have won, yet six Avengers had managed to defeat them. He wasn’t sure how they’d won, let alone how they’d do it again, and they couldn’t risk being arrogant or making assumptions based on that one experience, either. They’d gotten lucky after all, had had an off-switch, and they’d had superhuman help besides.

Fighting on their own turf was considered an advantage, but it would mean their homes would end up damaged in the chaos. Which is why he’d needed EDITH. If the spell worked it would protect their planet and keep civilians safe, which he wished was what he could truly make their priority.

EDITH would be able to warn them of unwanted guests entering their solar system and would allow them time to prepare their attack while dealing out the first heavy blows. But even if EDITH would withhold against any threats that would come their way no matter how powerful, it would only be truly effective it their enemies had limited resources.

Yet, effective or not, EDITH was ready to be launched.

Now the problem was how to do so without sparking mass debate on the safety and privacy of civilians.

His Iron Man suit had already been heavily criticized for placing too much power in the hands of one man, making a weapon of mass destruction private property – he still denied that description, but he had to admit it wasn’t such a leap to assume it dangerous. If it had been anyone else’s he might even agree.

But these were his hands. He knew he was capable; knew he was only going to use it for good.

Yet, he doubted the public would be so willing to believe him. Especially after the whole Ultron debacle.

Meaning they had to launch it without alerting anyone.

Which was easier said than done.

Despite all the stealth technology they’d used to make it untraceable on radars except his own – something he’d worked on with Harley -, people would notice four massive satellites being shot into space from all around the world. There would be questions they couldn’t answer and regulations they couldn’t follow.

“Blueberry?”

Stephen was sitting on the desk behind him, legs framing his hips and chest pressed against his back. Like a sorcerer-sized backpack. Tony loved it, snuggling in closer to his warmth as he held out the packet of food in front of him. Stephen placed his chin on his shoulder, looking over the blueberries critically before nodding.

Tony turned his head and, pressing a kiss to Stephen’s cheek where he could reach it, handed him a couple before turning back to face Wanda and holding the packet out in offering. The witch politely shook her head no, her mind obviously still fully focussed, trying to find a solution.

It was sunny outside, the light shining in through the glass wall soothing the seriousness of the situation. Tony wished he could be outside again, craving that peaceful feel of walking around Central Park without any thoughts of the apocalypse in his mind.

The prospect of launching EDITH was lifting Tony’s mood however, knowing that even if he’d never be able to feel that careless ever again, at least soon he wouldn’t have to feel quite this defenceless anymore. Their first steps towards a possible victory in motion.

“Can’t you just say they’re regular SI satellites?” 

“There’s like a ninety-nine percent chance that there’s going to be objections even against my ‘normal’ satellites,” Tony answered the witch, shrugging as he glanced at the projection that showed EDITH in all her glory, hidden away in his ‘secret bases’. He’d had JARVIS construct EDITH in a few abandoned warehouses around the world, bases no one had been to in years, so under the radar even Nick Fury wouldn’t have been able to find it had he still been alive. “Even if we have it go through the normal test and regulation controls, and they let it pass – which I doubt they will – that would take at least another year. And that’s with my persuasion to speed it up.”

“We can’t risk waiting that long,” Stephen agreed with him, voice low and serious. Tony waited for him to continue speaking, but he didn’t elaborate, so he only squeezed the sorcerer’s thigh lightly as he turned back to Wanda.

“How about-?”

He was interrupted by the doors of the lab sliding open, and despite having full faith in FRIDAY and his security systems, he couldn’t help holding his breath at the sound. It had been a while since he’d heard it, and with everything else going on he hadn’t really bothered keeping up with the Avengers.

Once he’d confirmed that it was indeed just Rhodey, however, as the only person with access to his lab from the tower, he smiled. “Platypus! How’s it going?”

Rhodey ignored him, glancing around the lab with a frown as he crossed his arms. “Where’s my favourite niece?”

Tony rolled his eyes as he grinned at him, stepping away from Stephen’s grasp as he moved to hug his best friend. “Getting ice cream with May and the boys. No one saw you enter, did they?”

“Of course not.” Rhodey shrugged as he reciprocated the hug, patting Tony’s shoulder; “Hammer tried to install five different types of security cameras throughout the tower but they all mysteriously end up malfunctioning.”

“Yeah, FRIDAY has been busy.” Tony replied, unable to keep the fond note out of his voice. Stepping back, he considered his friend before asking. “We were just figuring out how to launch EDITH without anyone noticing. Any ideas?”

“Even with Hammer’s tech they’d probably notice the launch,” Rhodey frowned after a few seconds of thinking, “You can hack into the pentagon and write in a scheduled launch to erase suspicion, but higher-ups might ask questions if they don’t recognize the launch. If you want to do this without anyone noticing you’re going to have to distract as many officials as possible.”

Wanda shifted on her feet, pulling everyone’s attention to her as she crossed her arms. Her face was pulled into a thoughtful expression, high ponytail accentuating the serious angels of her face as she carefully observed the three men opposite her. “So how do we distract all of them?”

A thought dawned on him then, the sparks of an idea igniting easily in Tony’s mind. He allowed it to linger for a second, thinking over the possible pros and cons before making a decision. They needed to distract officials, which is something Tony had done often in the past. Distraction used to take on the form of alcohol and strippers, be it in helping Rhodey relax or getting on the good side of business partners and rivals alike. 

He hadn’t done it in years, didn’t really feel like partying or drinking or interacting with anyone that wasn’t part of his immediate family. But it would work.

“Rhodey,” he started, his best friend’s dark eyes immediately sending him a suspicious look, recognising his tone and expression. “how high are the chances of the Avengers accepting an invitation to a Stark Industries event attended by none other than Tony Stark himself?”

“If it’s up to Rogers? I’d say pretty high,” he frowned, “why?”

“We’ll throw a party,” Tony explained easily, still trying to figure out the details. He glanced at Stephen, who seemed to be watching him with the same thoughtful expression. Similar cogs seemed to be spinning behind his eyes, which had Tony smile slightly to himself as he pressed against Stephen’s leg, the contact soothing and grounding as always. “Invite all the big guys. Seeing as no one has officially heard from me in months, no one will want to miss it. Especially if I’m scheduled to hold a speech.”

“Didn’t you put Rogers in deep storage the last time you saw him?” Stephen asked from behind him, a hint of amusement tinging his voice.

Tony shivered at the reminder, images of Sophia’s cowering form flashing in front of his eyes. He pushed them away, but let the memory charge his anger as he gritted his teeth. “He deserved it.”

“He did,” Stephen nodded in agreements, voice soft and apologetic for having brought it up, grabbing Tony’s arm lightly, the touch reminding him of his support, that he’d always be at his side, “but it might make them think twice about showing up, don’t you think?”

He had to admit Stephen had a point.

“Rhodey?” Tony grimaced, aiming the question towards Rhodey instead and watching as his best friend shrugged in response.

“Rogers still thinks he can convince you to come back. Romanoff might convince him of the opposite, but seeing as the alternative is continuing working with Hammer… I think they’d give it a chance. As far as I’m aware they don’t actually know you’re working – among other things –,” he paused to send Tony a look, which he easily answered with a wink and smirk, “with Stephen either. They just think you’re still angry.” 

“Perfect,” Tony smiled nervously, despite the angry coils building in his stomach at the insinuation that the Avengers just thought him petty and stubborn. It reminded him he really didn’t want to see them again, a confirmation that he had made the right choice in leaving.

Besides, the last event they’d gone to hadn’t ended great… It felt strange to suddenly feel that familiar pull of anxiety again, something that over the last few weeks had been so easily avoided, put aside to focus on what was in front of him. Just thinking about the Avengers… it made his chest constrict, his heart speeding up despite his better judgement. He turned to face Stephen, the sorcerer already watching him with a worried frown. “You’ll come, right? We’ll make a statement out of it?”

Stephen’s eyes raked over his face, both comforting and unnerving. It was familiar, having the sorcerer checking his features for signs of sincerity or distress, searching for what was underneath the surface, but Tony wasn’t sure which the sorcerer wanted to see, what would convince Stephen to come with him.

“I’ll be there either way, in public or hidden in the shadows, whichever you prefer.”

“I want you next to me.”

“Then that’s where I’ll be.” 

Tony couldn’t help but smile in relief, leaning up to press a quick kiss to Stephen’s lips, the sorcerer squeezing his hip in comfort. He allowed himself to get lost in it, smiling against Stephen’s mouth as he licked against his tongue, tilting his head to get a better angle. 

“If there’s nothing more to discuss…?” Wanda’s amused accent spoke up, interrupting their kiss which was unintentionally turning into something deeper. Tony grinned sheepishly as he pulled back, rolling his eyes at Stephen’s smirk before turning back to face the others with a confident smile.

“There is actually something else…,” Tony started, leaning back against Stephen as he had before, feeling all of Stephen around him, enveloping him with comforting warmth. It was a meagre alternative to having Stephen’s tongue in his mouth, warm lips pressed together in familiar movements, but it would do. “Now we’ve figured out a decent defence, I need to know more about these infinity stones. We need to figure out how to disarm them or how to distort their signal so hopefully we’ll be able to avoid a confrontation altogether. We need to make sure Thanos can never achieve his goals if we fail.”

It had been on his mind for a while, knew that they needed a way to completely eliminate the chances of the stones falling in the wrong hands. He’d wanted to finish EDITH first, because he already felt bad enough at having the protection of people be their second priority. He was terrified of at some point having to choose, having to forego saving civilians for the protection of a stupid rock.

Even knowing it would lead to their death either way couldn’t dull the guilt.

“I think I might be able to offer my assistance.”

A rush of adrenaline went through him as a hand pressed onto his sternum, pushing his back closer against Stephen’s chest as Stephen’s other arm moved in front of him, spell already firing in his hand as it pulled up a barrier between their part of the room and the side where Vision had just phased through the wall. Tony blinked at the sudden interruption, glancing down at how Stephen’s hands were protecting him, his face serious as he glared at the android, spell still holding strong.

“_Vision_!” Wanda breathed, the first one to respond as she had her hand pressed against her own chest and eyes still wide in fear. “You almost gave me a heart attack!”

“My apologies, Wanda,” Vision spoke, nodding at her in greeting, before turning to face Tony and Stephen. Tony was surprised to see the android himself, watching over him critically. Clearly, he should have accounted for the possibility of him being able to get into his lab, but he wasn’t sure what it meant that he’d shown up now.

The timing was suspiciously perfect, as Tony’s eye caught the sparkling gem on his forehead.

“I’m not sure what caused JARVIS’ revival, but it did link with the part of JARVIS that was used in my creation.” Vision explained, and when Tony glanced at Rhodey, it was clear his friend wasn’t that surprised. Tony hadn’t really seen him that much since JARVIS’s … revival, he guessed was in fact a good word. At the time he’d been preoccupied with Stephen, and since the event that tore him away from the Avengers, he hadn’t had contact with anyone but Rhodey.

It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Vision, however. He’d never gotten close to him because he hadn’t been sure what to think of him. He’d been part Ultron after all, but also part JARVIS, and hearing his voice without it being him had been unnerving to say the least. 

“So… you’ve just been eavesdropping on us…,” Tony squinted at him, not really sure what to think of him now either. Rhodey didn’t seem fazed by him being there, didn’t seem worried, and though he trusted his friend’s judgement, he wasn’t quite ready to trust so blindly.

“Not purposefully,” Vision answered, the slightest bit of regret audible in his voice, “and I can assure you I have spoken to no one about anything I learned from JARVIS. I merely thought it would be useful to study the stone on my forehead.”

Tony considered it. It was definitely something he’d had in mind as soon as he’d made his appearance. He’d assumed he would be able to get readings from Stephen’s time stone, but he knew Stephen would be reluctant to part with it, and the sorcerer couldn’t stick around all day because he had his own duties to fulfil.

More interesting as well was how the stone had played a role in Wanda’s powers, and that connection could hopefully show some more insight. A memory of something Wong had said also popped to the front of his mind, how Wanda’s magic had in turn granted life to the android… If they could figure out how to keep Vision alive without the stone… perhaps by exploiting the connection between the android and the witch… they would be able to take back the stone and destroy it.

“Sure,” Tony started, moving his hands to pull Stephen’s arm back down, the sorcerer glancing over at him carefully but obeying his wish as the magic dropped away, breaking the barrier between them. “We could use your help.”

* * *

There was soft music filtering through the sliver of his open bedroom door as Tony stepped out of his bathroom. It was probably some movie or television show Stephen had put on for Sophia, so he didn’t pay it any mind as he moved to get dressed.

His muscles still pulled pleasantly from the workout he’d gotten with Stephen earlier, them having fallen into the rhythm of training together every few days. It was a nice distraction from life, helped relief stress, and with the event coming closer and closer Tony could really use it.

That morning he’d worked out the last details with Pepper and he knew everything was perfect. Tony had full faith in his CEO and best friend, and as Rhodey had predicted, the Avengers had already RSVP’d. Tony wasn’t sure what to think of that.

Why would they agree to come?

He’d never expected Rogers to be so delusional as to think Tony would still come back after what had happened in Brussels and was baffled as to why they would even want him too. It didn’t matter, however, as it worked in their favour now.

He’d already spend some time working with Vision and Wanda, and though they were making progress it was going a lot slower than he would like. He’d hoped Wanda’s magic, as it was already partially integrated with Vision, would be enough to form a replacement for the stone, yet it seemed that there was a lot more to the stone than they’d probably ever understand. 

Once he had finished getting dressed, he left the bedroom, the thoughts immediately pushed from his mind when he noticed the music growing louder as he stepped into the hallway. He realised with a frown that the sound was too loud and too clear to come from a television, too pure to be pulled from speakers, and he slowly made his way over to the living room, carefully following the sound as if moving too quickly would scare it away.

When he’d bought the penthouse about two months ago now, it had been right after saving Sophia and the subsequent cold shoulder from Stephen. He hadn’t thought much about the furnishing, just let Pepper take care of everything, so he’d barely spared the piano overlooking the city a second glance. It had been years since he’d played, anyway, and didn’t think he’d suddenly start feeling the urge to start again now.

So, it was strange that the music was flowing through the penthouse.

A smile was tugging at his lips by the time he got a view of the instrument in the corner of the living room, the image in front of him expected as the only explanation yet so surprising still. He hadn’t known Stephen could play the piano, let alone after his accident, but he was sitting on the stool, fingers moving over the keys as the air filled with a melody Tony didn’t recognise.

Even more precious, was the fact that Sophia was sitting next to him, leaning against his side with wide eyes as she watched over his hands in awe. Stephen looked away from the keys every so often so he could glance down at the sleepy toddler, smile tugging at his own lips as he continued playing with practiced ease.

Tony couldn’t look away.

It was magnetising, the scene so peaceful and calming that all he could do was lean against the wall and hope for it to last forever.

When the song ended way sooner than Tony would have liked, he noticed Sophia had dozed off fully, head still resting against Stephen’s arm in the dim room, chest rising and falling heavily with sleep. Tony watched as Stephen moved his arm, letting the toddler fall against his side instead as he wrapped it around her, steadying her so she wouldn’t fall backwards off the stool.

It’s then that the sorcerer looked up to meet Tony’s eyes, shy smile on his face as he blushed slightly.

“I liked the song,” Tony said as he stepped away from the wall, unable to take his eyes away from the pair, “Mozart?”

Stephen’s eyes shone with mirth, smirking as he replied easily, “Disney. Colours of the Wind to be exact. Sophia recognised it.”

Tony rolled his eyes but couldn’t help the fondness that bloomed in his chest, walking closer until he was standing behind Stephen, wrapping his arms around his neck and dropping his voice to near whisper. “You really are a birthday party attraction.”

Stephen snorted, rolling his eyes at the reference to something Tony had told to him years ago at their first meeting. It had been a very different context, as back in the day Tony definitely wouldn’t have been wrapped around the sorcerer’s neck as a perfect replacement for that cloak of his, let alone been smiling softly at him.

It had been said with disdain, as Stephen had simply been the villain.

Admittedly an incredibly hot one.

“It used to be my sister’s favorite.”

Tony frowned as he recognised the obvious sadness in his tone, squeezing the tiniest bit tighter in comfort, before pulling away. Stephen stopped him however, grabbing his arm with his free hand - the other still wrapped around Sophia - he twisted his head, pulling him closer until he could reach Tony’s lips.

He would never complain, easily pressing in closer as he savoured the taste of Stephen’s mouth against his. The feeling soft and familiar, the kiss warm and languid, dragging Tony down into the depths as he kept falling and falling. It was easy to let the rest of the world disappear, focus solely on the sorcerer in front of him. His cedar musk and tea-stained lips.

Pulling away reluctantly before he lost himself completely, he rested his forehead against Stephen’s fondly, taking a deep, satisfied breath.

“Just give me a minute to put this little miss to bed,” he explained before pressing a last kiss to his lips and standing up straight, picking up Sophia from underneath Stephen’s arm. She didn’t even stir as he pulled her against his chest, already in deep sleep. Stephen watched them with a sad smile, thoughts seemingly pulled somewhere else, but Tony didn’t want his attention to stray, wanted Stephen to share this feeling of deep contentment and affection.

“Hey,” Tony said, voice soft as Stephen’s eyes moved up to meet his, “please continue playing.”

Stephen nodded, earlier sorrow fading away as he turned back towards the piano, clear notes filling the room once more. This time it was a song Tony recognised from his own piano lessons, though he didn’t remember the name, and he smiled as he moved out of the living room. He hoped playing would help distract the sorcerer until he came back, recognising by now how he faded into grief too easily to Tony’s liking.

It didn’t take long for him to tuck Sophia into bed, placing her favorite teddy bear next to her head for if she were to wake up at night, and he closed the bedroom door behind him as he headed back into the living room. He always had JARVIS look over her, who notified him whenever she woke up. The last few nights she’s slept peacefully, however, and he hoped that trend would last.

Stephen continued playing as he entered, and he moved over to him at once, taking Sophia’s place at his side, dropping his head onto Stephen’s shoulder and pressing a kiss against his neck.

Over the last few weeks they’d gotten more comfortable around each other, having had more time to explore the affectionate side of their relationship, untainted by rivalry or upheld walls. Tony didn’t want to hold back anymore, wanted to indulge himself now it was allowed, and as the world would possibly end soon, he didn’t see a reason to fight his own urges. If he wanted to touch the sorcerer, he did. He could lean into him for comfort and hope to be a comfort to the sorcerer in turn.

Stephen still seemed to filter his words, but he would soften up underneath his touch each time, not needing to fear slipping up through body language.

“You’re really hot when you play the piano…,” he murmured into his ear, already in love with the way Stephen’s body reacted to him. The way he shivered as his breath ran down his neck, leg shifting until it was pressing more firmly against his thigh. His hands were still moving over the keys without a hitch, giving the air of perfect composure had it not been for Tony’s front row view. His words earned him a soft chuckle, the sultry sound burning deep into his core. “Is that so…”

“No,” Tony smiled, leaning back so he could look at Stephen’s face, the way his eyebrow tilted in disbelief, “it’s not hot… it’s _sexy_.” He teased, accentuating the word with a wiggle of his eyebrows and a smile spread over his lips.

He waited long enough to watch Stephen roll his eyes, before he leaned in again, trailing kisses over Stephen’s jaw, starting by his ear. He was nearly at his lips when Stephen’s mouth dropped open in pleasure, allowing Tony easy access to plunge his tongue past his lips once he got there. 

It was then that the music truly started. Stephen’s moans like symphonies in his ears, reverberating past his lips as he pressed closer and swallowed them whole. Stephen’s hands grabbed at his hair, pulling at the strands and sending both shivers and sparks through Tony’s body.

Tony wanted Stephen to press him into the cushioned top of the piano bench, but recognising that wouldn't necessarily be comfortable and they weren’t twenty anymore, he settled on giving Stephen one last hungry kiss, before standing up. Pulling at Stephen’s robes, he forced the sorcerer to follow him, his eyes never once leaving his, following Tony’s moves like someone watching a ballet dancer for the first time. 

Apparently making their way to the bedroom was still taking too long for Stephen’s liking, wrapping his arms around Tony’s waist to pull him closer against him, breaking their trance of locked eyes in the dark. It made them stumble slightly, but all Tony could do was grin when Stephen’s lips left wet kisses along his throat. He pressed into the touch, forcing his eyes to stay open as they managed to get to the bedroom door. 

Tony broke away as they reached their bed, turning to face Stephen as his knees bumped against the edge of his mattress, teasing smirk on his lips as his tongue darted out to lick the remnants of Stephen’s taste. 

“Show me how skilled your hands truly are.”

To his surprise, Stephen didn't roll his eyes this time. Instead, still clearly visible in the dark of their room, his pupils blew impossibly wide, lines of his face shifting darker. Tony had to moan at the sight, completely against his will, deep and guttural as he stared up at Stephen in awe. His groin, which had been heating steadily, fully erupting in flames. 

Finally, Stephen crossed the last step between them and gripped at his hips possessively, attacking Tony’s lips in earnest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really want to thank the people who commented on the last chapter! You're all so super sweet and your feedback is seriously appreciated! 💕💕💕


	31. vulnerable

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> before we start; thank you for the lovely comments on the previous chapter! they were so much fun to read and all incredibly sweet so thank you. 💕💕💕

The entrance hall was basked in a pleasant orange glow as Stephen waited by the front door with the teens. Tony was still tucking Sophia into bed, while Harley and Peter were tying their shoelaces and sculpting their hair at the bottom of the stairs.

Their evening would be interesting to say the least, Stephen pondered as he watched over the two teens who had insisted on accompanying them. Harley looked completely at ease in his suit, despite Stephen doubting he’d ever worn one before, and Peter seemed even more giddy than usual, a mix of nerves and excitement clear on his face.

“Peter,” he spoke softly, pulling the teen’s attention to him.

Peter’s eyes were wide, like a deer caught in headlights, as he turned to him. He looked like that whenever addressed directly, but Stephen only smirked fondly each time. He knew it wasn’t personal, had seen the same look directed towards Tony or even Harley a few times before. 

Stephen wondered if it was because he so often got lost in his own thoughts he forgot about the rest of the world until it called for him. Or maybe it was a coping mechanism for tuning out the constant onslaught of sensations yelling for his attention. “Stop messing with your cuffs. You’ll end up looking like a madman.”

Peter nodded, still obviously on edge, and moved to tug at his cuffs again, before grimacing and glancing up at Stephen sheepishly.

“So-,” Tony started as he finally joined them, closing the door to his penthouse behind him. Stephen could see his mind racing a mile a minute from his spot by the door, and he threw Peter a wink as he noticed Tony tugging at his own cuffs. The teen grinned back at him, standing up straight as he carded a hand through his hair. “Everyone ready?”

“Waiting on you.” Stephen spoke easily, voice smooth and steadfast, though the twinkle in Tony’s eyes when they met his indicated that his affection had still shone through.

Tony proved his suspicion as he stepped up next to Stephen instead of heading out the door, slipping an arm around his waist as he pressed a kiss to Stephen’s cheek. Stephen had to fight to keep his composure, biting his tongue to stop himself from reacting as the string of butterflies danced happily around his stomach.

It should be illegal for a grown man to be able to feel like this. Illegal for someone to make _Stephen _feel like this, annoyed at the emotions swarming around his chest as he held on just a little tighter to the engineer.

His mind almost drifted towards unpleasant thoughts of the future, but he reeled them back, allowing Tony’s weight against him to ground him to the present.

Tonight would be a step towards prevention, towards saving Tony. Stephen was fully aware that the chances were low of their actions being enough to change what he’d seen. They’d tried again and again, starting earlier in the line where there had been a billion more possibilities. Yet despite everything, time seemed to be hurtling towards one final goal. Like the universe itself was craving Iron Man’s downfall. 

But he was focusing on the _present_.

The present where they would head out in public - for the first time together - and would spend the evening mingling with people who’d probably love to see him behind bars if not dead. Stephen was looking forward to it, longed to see the Avengers’ faces when they realised who Tony’s date was.

For them to see all they were missing by having treated Tony like crap and chasing him away.

He knew Tony didn’t want a fight to break out, however, so he was going to be on his best behavior.

Swallowing deeply, he glanced down at the shorter man next to him, letting his eyes wander over his suit in appreciation. Even if tonight would be a disaster, at least it was a great excuse to see Tony all dressed up again.

He loved everything the shorter man wore, mind you, even a literal potato sack wouldn’t be able to take away Tony’s beauty, with his radiant smile and eyes like smoked quartz.

But that didn’t mean he couldn’t appreciate the different aspects of Tony’s appeal the different outfits complemented.

Like how the jacket was tailored, accentuating his broad shoulders and slim waist, and how the pants fitted his ass perfectly.

Tony didn’t let himself be put off by the lack of reaction, clearly used to Stephen pretending to be stoic around him, as he only grinned and turned back towards the teens.

“You heard the wizard; everyone out.”

Harley and Peter did as they were told, the oldest huffing in annoyance at their antics, before they piled into the Audi that was waiting for them by the curb.

Happy had driven it here with May, both being on babysitting duty, and Stephen refused to show hesitation as he stepped around the vehicle to the passenger side.

He wanted to ignore the concerned look Tony threw him, but the engineer wasn’t letting up, locking the doors after the teens had gotten in so Stephen couldn’t avoid the worried question.

Glancing up, he was relieved to not find any pity in Tony’s eyes. He wasn’t looking at Stephen like he was fragile or weak. 

Instead his forehead was pulled into a frown, steady eyes meeting his in a stern gaze. “I don’t want to make a big deal out of this if you don’t want me to, but the second you need to stop you tell me.”

Stephen wanted to say something in response but couldn’t decide between snapping at him or reassuring him, annoyed at the tension already building in his shoulders without his consent, so all he could manage was a stony nod. 

Tony gave him one last glance, before sighing in defeat and opening the doors.

They could have used a portal of course, at least to get closer to the venue, but this was the least complicated solution as they needed the car to arrive to the event. They weren’t quite going to make the grant reveal of Tony dating _a sorcerer_quite yet, so subtlety was key, and Stephen was too stubborn to admit that it bothered him in the first place.

Stephen got into the car quickly, slamming the door behind him and locking it, leaving no room for him to flee. He _didn’t _want to make a big deal out of it. It _wasn’t_.

It had been four years since his accident. And no, he hadn’t gotten into a car since then, but he’d experienced worse by now. The crash was nothing next to actually _dying _a couple of times. Some fancy car was not going to bring him to his knees, wouldn’t let himself get defeated by a stupid metal can.

And after all, it hadn’t been the car’s fault he’d crashed. That had been his own hubris and stupidity.

A quick look in the rearview mirror showed Peter watching them, eyebrows knitted together as he’d clearly caught on to the last worried glance Tony sent Stephen before starting the engine.

Stephen refused to meet his eyes, only stared straight ahead, focusing on the cars of the New York traffic as they started their trip. It was dark out, the city mostly empty by now, so it shouldn’t take more than half an hour to get to the event venue. Only ten minutes of open highway. And none spent driving along the edge of a cliff.

By the time the first few minutes had passed, Stephen felt himself relax more, keeping his gaze fixed on the windshield in front of him and the light reflected from Harley’s phone in the back. It was so simplistic, such a domestic scene that it was easy to get distracted by the absurdity of it all.

Him in the car with the man he loved, whose two sons were sitting in the back... God, Stephen didn’t want to lose this. Didn’t want to miss whatever this could turn into.

Though he would have never admitted it, he’d always had this sort of expectation that his life would be like this one day. Despite being aware of his horrid personality and general hatred of most of the human population, a very childish part of him buried deep in his subconscious had been waiting for that moment.

He’d grown up in the backseat of a car with two siblings next to him and parents that contrary to most of his classmates’ had remained happily married.

There had always been that assumption that one day it would be him sitting in the front seat. First with a wife, then quite possibly with a husband, until eventually his parents had drilled into him that that would be unacceptable, so he’d settled for not thinking about it at all.

He noticed they’d gotten onto the highway now, and his lungs spasmed as the car took up speed. His hands were balled at his side, hoping Tony wouldn’t notice as he started breathing through his nose, pursing his lips as he focused on staying quiet, eyes still trained on the road in front of him.

Despite all of it, he’d still felt the loss of that childhood hope the moment he’d veered off that cliff.

He’d been a catch before that. Anyone would have been lucky to even go out on a date with someone like him. He was every parents’ dream son-in-law; the handsome and successful neurosurgeon. It wouldn’t have even mattered whether he’d actually loved them.

By that point he hadn’t even believed in love anymore.

But after his accidents even those faintest sparks of affection he’d felt for that childish daydream had been ripped from him.

For who would ever want a washed-up cripple who was quickly losing all he’d built?

Yet, despite all odds he’d somehow ended up with the most gorgeous soul in the universe wanting him.

“Tony?” Stephen wheezed quietly, swallowing as he let his eyes shift off the road towards the engineer.

Tony looked at him at once, carefully, catching on to Stephen’s need to not alert the teens behind them. He was already slowing down, and Stephen knew he would want to stop on the hard shoulder.

“Don’t,” he gritted out between his teeth, pleading eyes turned towards Tony who was trying his best to stay focused on the road. He reached up his hand for as much he could, feeling completely frozen in his seat. “Just... “

Tony immediately understood the request, biting his teeth as he glanced towards Stephen in hesitation. “Are you sure you don’t prefer both my hands on the wheel? Extra reassurance?”

“I don’t care. I trust you. Please?” Stephen managed out, hating the desperation bubbling in his chest. He just caught Tony’s soft smile before he reached out and linked his fingers with Stephen’s. He sighed quietly at the contact, his body singing with relief as his heart made a watery jump in his chest, squeezing Tony’s hand for all he could. He had to blink against tears that were threatening to spill and glanced away from Tony as the man moved their linked fingers up to kiss the back of Stephen’s hands.

Stephen tried his best to focus on Tony’s skin against him, on the lights passing by coating the car in a hypnotising orange, and on the beating of his heart against his chest.

He was scared and couldn’t even hate himself for it. For Tony’s comfort was helping control his anxiety about driving in a car, but at the same time it was reminding him of all he was going to lose.

A chance in the mirror showed Peter watching them again, worry now clear in his features, and Stephen immediately ducked his head in embarrassment. His fingers twitched in Tony’s hold, who only tightened his grip.

Harley at least seemed oblivious, still tapping away at his phone, the noise disrupting the silence.

Focussing on Tony’s touch was helping, however, and by the time they’d reached the back roads leading towards the event hall, Stephen felt more composed again. Holding onto Tony’s hand like a lifeline, he could start thinking about the evening to come.

When the car rolled to a stop at the manor Pepper had booked for the event, Stephen finally felt his body relax again, glad to not be moving anymore. The front of the building was swarmed with paparazzi, tightly controlled by the security guards Stark Industries had hired. They’d expected them, of course, yet checking up on the teens showed them shifting with nerves.

Stephen wasn’t used to them either. There had been a few events back in his surgeon days that had garnered enough attention to have the press present, but never in this quantity, and he’d only rarely been the focus of that attention. 

Now he’d walk down the carpet with Tony Stark, famous billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, and superhero. Yet Stephen wasn’t nervous.

First things first, he’d be damned if he cared what anyone – let alone the _paparazzi_– thought of him. Second, he was going to walk down the carpet with _Tony Stark, famous billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, and superhero. _And he belonged to _him._

There was nothing else that mattered as Stephen glanced back over towards Tony, their hands still linked over the center console. Tony was watching over the crowd critically, but it was only when he squeezed Stephen’s hand again that Stephen realized that _Tony _was nervous.

He could see it now, in the way his face was unsmiling, eyes intently searching the crowd. Stephen had known it would be difficult for him, with the Avengers on the guestlist unavoidable as it had been the point of the event. He just hadn’t expected him to worry about the press. Tony had grown up with red carpets, but seeing him now, Stephen guessed he’d never grown used to them.

With what he knew about Tony as a person it made sense. They had always made him out to be outgoing and confident, flaunting his personality and transgressions with no remorse, never bothered with trying to hide anything from the public. Perhaps in the past Tony really had been like that, before Stephen had known him, but he doubted it. Tony was confident, sure, but he cared what people thought of him, was constantly striving to make someone proud who never would be, someone who’d passed long ago.

Someone who’d been murdered before getting to see the man Tony would become. 

It wouldn’t have openly bothered him, but the words would have gotten to Tony more than he would have liked to admit.

Stephen squeezed Tony’s hand in turn, but when that didn’t bring the inventor’s eyes back to him, he reached out to tilt his face back himself.

As Tony’s gaze finally met his with a questioning glint, he leaned forward to place a delicate kiss to his lips, glad to feel Tony’s smile form underneath his touch. 

“Relax,” he started when he leaned back, voice low and soothing, “they love you.”

Stephen’s heart jumped pleasantly at the twinkle in Tony’s eyes, warming his chest. The engineer leaned in to kiss him again, before turning to the backseat.

“Ready boys? Last chance to back out.”

“I’m good.” Harley shrugged. He didn’t seem to care about the paparazzi either, a stark contrast to Peter eyeing the crowd like a kid about to get his cavities filled.

“Underoos?”

“I’m fine!” He replied, the lie clear in his eyes as they refused to meet Tony’s, but his voice grew more determined as he continued, “we’re with you.”

Tony hadn’t been a fan of taking the teens, having tried his hardest to keep them as far away from the Avengers – and the public eye – as possible, but they’d insisted on being there. Tony thought it was too dangerous, didn’t want their normal lives ruined by the constant onslaught of attention he’d grown up with, and the teens refused to stay behind, wanting to be there for Tony, fully aware of how hard it would be on him despite Tony’s obvious lies that he didn’t care.

It had been an argument and a half, but the teens hadn’t let up, both as stubborn and protective as their father. So, in the end, Stephen had offered to alter their appearance with magic, and a compromise had been reached.

Stephen knew he was still nervous about it, as he was nervous about everything concerning the Avengers, but he’d done his best in trying to soothe the engineer. Stephen knew the worrying wouldn’t do him any good, but it would only be for a few more hours, and after that everything would be fine again. He personally would see to it that no harm would come to Tony, Peter, or Harley.

“Alright then. Let’s go.” Tony sighed, breathing in deeply before opening his door.

The change was immediate; their tiny bubble of peace in the car disturbed as the immense wave of noise pierced through.

Stephen looked through the windshield at Tony as he made his way to his side of the car, earlier nerves easily hidden behind a charming smile and his tinted glasses. He looked radiant, as he always did, but the starlight image was disturbed by the lines in his face that only Stephen would recognize as discomfort.

It was truly mesmerizing how despite the clear anxiety in his posture, no one seemed to notice it, fully blinded by the brilliance of Tony Stark. Stephen tried to think back to his first impressions of the billionaire, trying to remember if he himself had believed the ruse.

He probably had, but he let that thought drift away as his door was opened by Tony himself, his hand hovering in front of him to help him out of the car. It didn’t matter that he’d fallen for his carefree façade in the past, as he knew better now, had fallen in love with the man behind the mask.

Stephen followed Tony’s example, taking in a deep breath before plastering on a smile and stepping out into the crowd.

People screamed when they noticed Stephen, surprised Tony had finally brought a date since the last time had been years ago, and he let go of Tony’s hand as he effortlessly draped his arm around Tony’s waist. It belonged there, fitting perfectly in the curve of his back, and he pressed the engineer against him.

He smiled at how Tony reacted at once, burying himself even closer as he smiled up at Stephen for barely a second before turning back towards the crowd and waving elegantly, smile worth a thousand bucks plastered on his face.

After taking a second to let the crowd take them in and calm down a bit, Tony stepped away from Stephen to open the door to the back seat, allowing the teens to crawl out. Stephen felt the spell around them charge up around the unfamiliar people as Harley stepped out first, and he was pleased the magic seemed to be holding strong.

He hadn’t expected any different from his own skill after all.

If possible, at the sight of the teens, the noise of the crowd doubled, thrown over them like a lion’s roar, and in the distance, he could already hear the chatter of the gossip channels.

Harley watched over the crowd with a neutral expression. Stephen was amused at how bored he managed to look; shoulders thrown back casually as his hands were slipped into the pockets of his pants. His jaw was more pronounced than usual however, indicating he wasn’t as comfortable as he would like to appear.

Only people who knew him would notice the difference though, unlike Peter whose grin was sincere, but who kept his eyes firmly locked on the younger fans who’d come out with signs and drawings of their favorite hero.

Any attempt to face the taller crowd failed as his eyes widened slightly and his smile faltered with panic before finding solace in the kids, easily distracted by the bright colours and crudely drawn images.

“Ready?” Tony asked underneath his breath, leaning into him so Stephen would be the only one hearing his question. 

Stephen smiled down at him in reassurance, holding out his elbow for Tony to take. “Ready when you are.”

The look Tony directed towards him was blinding as he linked his arm through Stephen’s, the first genuine smile he’d seen from him since stepping out of the car.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> making this chapter was a ride (ha)
> 
> I had originally planned to have it be split over two chapters so then I needed a first part for the entrance hall/car scene and I'd written it but then it took a TURN so it didn't fit anymore and I had to move that scene to the future
> 
> how many unintentional puns is that?
> 
> Also the reason this Gala exists is because I needed an excuse for the both of them to wear suits again and for Stephen to drive a car. and the idea for the car scene specifically came while reading nanosorcerer's I Knew You For A Day which is just brilliant 🥰
> 
> also really wanted to put Sophia in a cute little dress but I could not find a decent excuse for that lmao
> 
> This fic is self-indulgence 🤷🏼


	32. Eros

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been about a month whoops.
> 
> Then it got to long and I couldn't find a good place to split it so have a two-in-one deal
> 
> But I could continue editing and rewriting this chapter for eons so I just had to post and be rid of it.

The ballroom inside the mansion was absolutely gorgeous, no doubt thanks to Tony’s CEO. 

Miss Potts and her team of party planners had done a marvellous job making the old building into a spectacle. The tasteful black-and-white colour scheme and the modern chandeliers left the hall just dim enough to be cozy. A little podium, separated from them by the dance floor, was taken up by a classical band. They filled the room with calming music, while still being able to talk comfortably. 

The sight of the piano made Stephen smile to himself, glancing down at his companion, who was watching over the crowd with a calculating gaze. The throng of people in colourful gowns and suits, armed with glasses of champagne, was definitely less intimidating than the press outside, but Stephen knew this wasn’t a party; it was a battle ground. 

What was hiding behind the calm veil of music and laughter was to blame for his concern.

It only took him one sweep over the crowd to spot the Avengers. 

Stephen had almost expected them to show up in all their star-spangled glory, guns flailing like the barbarians they were. Yet, they had cleaned up nicely, fitting in perfectly with the celebrities around them. 

They hadn’t been the only ones curiously looking at the front doors, waiting to witness Iron Man’s entrance, either. Almost every single person in the room took a break from their conversation to glance towards them. 

They had expected the attention, of course. 

Tony had virtually disappeared into the shadows months ago, leaving a lot of people to question what had happened to the superhero after the debacle of the previous gala. 

On top of that old gossip, there were plenty of other reasons why someone would want to capture Tony’s gaze. 

Stephen had no qualms admitting he took great pleasure in the fact that he’d be the only one who’d have his full attention tonight.

The reason the Avengers were still so easily spotted, despite their camouflage, was the fact that they were clearly on the defence. They stuck out like a sore thumb; the only ones not smiling and chatting politely according to the etiquette required for an event like this.

They were divided over the crowd, seemingly at random yet clearly having placed themselves strategically. He took some comfort in the fact they weren’t complete idiots, recognising that Tony wasn’t their ally anymore. 

It barely took a second before he caught the slight widening of Rogers’ eyes as they met his. Satisfaction coursed through him at how they so clearly spoke of recognition, moving quickly between him and Tony hanging on his arm. It was euphoric, showing him off like this, showing how happy Tony was at his side. 

Yet, despite the pure pleasure he got from watching Rogers and team’s mouths drop to the floor, he was easily distracted from smirking at them as he felt Tony tense up next to him, the teens shifting uneasily behind his back.

Stephen let go of Tony’s arm, wrapping his own around his waist instead, keeping the shorter man close to him as he leaned in to whisper in his ear; “I’ve got you.”

That earned him a soft smile, though Tony’s eyes stayed firmly fixed on the hungry faces watching his every move, eager for but a second of his time. Like vultures watching over their pray, be it money or prestige or a fun night of carnal desire.

It was utterly disgusting to watch, to see them crave Tony’s attention with reasons all but selfless. Wanting to devour him and spit him out as soon as they were done with him, to wring out every perk there was for knowing him without dealing with any of his own needs. Be it anything as simple as a thank you. Leaving him without anything in return. 

Stephen would fight to be worthy of a place at his side, would make sure he wouldn’t be another one of those people who abandoned him more broken and worn out than before he’d met them. It actually hurt, to think of himself as another one of those people, his love only leaving him more bruised. Hurt to think that he was putting his own selfish need for Tony’s affection above his happiness and wellbeing.

Despite the shame of that possibility dragging him down, trying to make him regret the choices he’d made, he’d learned by now that it was too late to back out. Tony had instilled that in him. That leaving would not be an option, would hurt him only more. And so all he could do was fight to make up for his mistakes, to make the best out of it and fight for every second to make sure Tony would never feel abandoned or hurt by him again. He wanted to do right by him, to protect him for as much as he could. Even if he knew he’d be hurt in the end anyway.

That thought sobered him up quickly, though it was like a wave of cold water splashing over him. A reminder that Tony was going to die and he’d have nothing to stop it from happening. Everything was pointing to his death and he was still failing to fix it, to protect him from harm. He needed it, needed his safety more than anything, but it didn’t matter anymore whether or not Tony’s love for him would end up hurting the engineer. 

That Tony loved him only meant that his last few moments could be joyful, spent with someone he loved. That was all Stephen could hold onto. The only solace he could find besides denial.

So he squeezed Tony a little closer, leaned in to press a kiss against his temple, and revelled in the heat of Tony’s skin against his. For however long he’d still get to do so. 

Tony closed his eyes momentarily, leaning his head against Stephen’s shoulder for barely a second, before he put on his game face again and pulled Stephen along to a silver-haired man with glasses.

He wasn’t familiar to Stephen, though Tony greeted him like old friends. 

Content to just lean back and let Tony take the lead in wooing the crowd, he let himself look around at the people present. 

This far no one seemed to have taken a guess at the identity of Tony’s latest arm-candy yet, which was good for now. Stephen wasn’t one to brag, but he was one of the most pronounced villains of New York city after all. That didn’t mean people would recognize his face all too easily, however. The people who’d done enough research to come across the pictures of his surgeon days might figure out his identity, but even then, it wasn’t a given they’d also make the link to Doctor Strange the sorcerer. Stephen hadn’t been one to care about showing up on the evening news, meaning that most news coverage of his villainous activities had been just grainy enough to avoid his identification. 

It was a typical case of hiding in plain sight, really, no one daring to think Tony Stark’s date was a villain. 

The teens had followed them loosely behind, though Stephen could see people were already swarming in to ask them questions. 

Harley and Peter just looked like Harley and Peter to them, despite the glamour that was hiding their identity from everyone else, and Stephen was glad for it. It’s how he so clearly recognised how uncomfortable Peter was. 

He whispered a quiet apology to Tony before leaving his side, the engineer still seemingly enthralled by some story the first... command of the … Rhode Island - or whichever - base was telling. He hadn’t really been paying attention. 

Tony squeezed his hand lightly before letting go, a signal that he had heard him and would be fine. So, still reluctant to leave his side, he headed over to the crowd gathered around the teens. 

“Excuse us,” Stephen interrupted them as he moved to stand behind the teens, one arm around each kids’ shoulder. Nodding politely at the disappointed faces watching them, he carefully led them away. Harley rolled his eyes at him, though he didn’t seem mad, but Peter sighed in relief as Stephen dropped them off in a quiet corner of the room. 

“You don’t have to suck up to them, Pete. If you want them to fuck off you can say so.”

“I don’t want to be rude!” Peter protested, cheeks tinging pink as he turned his gaze to the floor. 

“They’re being rude by making you uncomfortable.”

“I wasn’t uncomfortable,” he tried to argue, but he clearly didn’t believe his argument had much merit, because he drooped off halfway through, puffing his cheeks before shrugging. “Harley was mainly talking anyway, so we were fine.”

Stephen hummed, but didn’t take any of his bullshit. He could hardly believe Harley would be suck up or would even bother trying to be polite. Especially now that he had a false identity to hide behind. 

Instead, he noticed Wanda a little further away. Her eyes were trained on the crowd, clearly in search of someone, but Stephen caught her attention and beckoned her closer. 

They had decided she would make a discreet portal to the inside of the building - as they hadn’t quite trusted the public to be ready for the return of the Scarlet Witch - and had been in charge of looking over the Avengers in their absence. 

It was almost a pity, Stephen pondered, as she looked _powerful._ Her dress of course was a dark red, tastefully hugging her chest and hips before spreading out towards the ground in fine satin. Her hair was pulled away from her face in a stylish ponytail, leaving her shoulders completely bare and giving her a professional glow. 

When Wong had told him that he’d send Wanda to work with Tony, he hadn’t been keen on the idea. He knew how uncomfortable the witch made Tony, and as Stephen had been too busy avoiding him and trying to forget about the engineer altogether, he wouldn’t have been able to check up on them. 

Stephen had kind of grown to like her in the end. He liked that she’d seen past the Avengers’ bullshit, and had stood up for her own values and believes no matter how controversial. At first he’d hated her for what she’d done, hated that her actions were what had led this universe towards the fight against Thanos and a future without Tony. Sometimes he still couldn’t shake that anger. 

But after everything, he wasn’t sure how well he was to believe that idea. That idea that if Sokovia hadn’t happened, the timeline would have been so different to steer clear of the Titan completely. More and more he was starting to believe that time wasn’t so fickle, that it had set its course by the start of the universe, and that one person - or even a group of powerful sorcerers - would be arrogant and foolish to believe their actions, no matter how drastic, would be enough to change it. Like a coil snapping back into place no matter how much you bent it. He was careful of her, but she’d done nothing yet to piss him off, so she was in the clear for now. Besides, he was fully confident that the second red whisks of magic were aimed at Tony, he’d know. If that would be the case he would have zero protest against snapping her pretty little neck. 

When she reached them, her eyes were wide and stormy. Stephen instinctively knew it wasn’t aimed at him, because she continued glanced towards the crowd every so often, still trying to catch whomever she was looking for. “I just talked to Vision…”

“What is it?” He asked at once, picking up on the urgency in her tone. 

“They found Barnes.”

The words made him stop short.

They had known the Avengers were still looking for the Winter Soldier - had never expected the Captain to give up so easily - yet that they’d be doing something so simple and irrelevant, when they’d been trying to keep the world from being destroyed, was kind of throwing him off. He knew they weren’t aware of the danger, of course, but that was probably the most distorting thing about it.

They had been so focused on trying to defeat the Titan before he would find his way towards Earth, that it seemed weird for everyone else to just be going along their normal day. They wouldn’t have been any help of course, which is why they had left the Avengers out in the first place.

He’d allowed them to continue their stupid search for the sole reason that they’d be distracted. 

He just didn’t know how to feel about the Captain actually having gotten his wish. He wanted him to be suffering, to be thinking about nothing but how his actions had led to their downfall and the loss of Tony’s loyalty. Yet, here he was, getting rewarded once more.

“Is he here?” Was his first question to the witch, needing to know whether the soldier was a threat to Tony. 

“No, he’s still in Bulgaria for now,” she replied, looking around her nervously. She had been keeping her own presence hidden from the Avengers, as they still thought her to be missing among the sorcerers - which he guessed she technically was. “But they’ve talked to him already. They’re trying to get him into the US. I know it’s not really important right now, but I thought Tony should know. After the video last time… to find out they’ve found his parents’ murderer…”

“I’ll talk to him…,” he sighed, already getting fed up with this event. This should have been their night, the night where they were the ones with all the trump cards. The night where they showed their power and allegiance off to the world. The night he got to be with Tony and pretend everything was normal while finally making the first steps to a false sense of safety. 

A night where Tony would feel more at ease, and would get the rewards of his struggling, would get to show off to the people who’d treated him like shit. 

But everything was crumbling. 

“Can you keep an eye on Harley and Peter?” He asked and she nodded, despite Harley’s protest that he didn’t need a babysitter. 

He didn’t complain any further, however; always one to put up a show while still doing what he recognised was best for him. Stephen liked that about Harley, as much as he liked Peter’s heart. They were different, yet both wanted the same thing, and Stephen could so clearly see where their love for Tony had influenced their personality. Easily recognised the habits and tricks they’d learned from the billionaire. 

Nodding to Wanda, Harley, and Peter, he turned around to head back towards Tony. His heart stopped when he spotted him. His face was hard, frown clear from across the room, as Rogers and Romanoff were talking to him. Wilson was standing a little bit to the side, watching him sceptically. 

This time when Stephen stepped up to him and placed a calming arm around his waste, Tony didn’t melt into him, didn’t calm down with his presence. Instead, Stephen watched as Tony continued staring the Avengers down, anger obvious in the dark of his eyes. He stayed tense as a statue, fists balled at his side as he his jaw tightened. 

Rogers’ eyes, however, did move from Tony to meet his, watching him in fury and disgust. 

Stephen wasn’t intimidated in the slightest. 

He was simply waiting for an excuse to obliterate him, to finally ruin him as he’d wanted to do for years. 

He still remembered that black eye Steve had given Tony almost two years ago, the anger and fury he’d felt that day still burning under his skin. 

He’d watched the slight tell-tale signs of make up covering his left eye during an on-screen interview. Stephen didn’t even remember what it had been about, too focused on Tony and the way Rogers was watching him carefully like a child about to step out of line. 

Despite everything, he still wouldn’t have harmed anyone unless absolutely necessary, still holding on desperately to the Hippocratic oath he’d sworn so long ago. Yet, he would have killed Steve that day, if not for Tony’s morals getting in the way. Tony’s stubbornness and determination that he was not to be harmed, even after what he’d done. 

He’d still been hoping to get a sliver of respect and gratitude from a team who would never show it. 

“Seriously, Tony?” Rogers spoke, clearly continuing their conversation from earlier. “You’re going to trust him over us?”

Stephen raised an unimpressed eyebrow at him, which made the captain scowl at him even more. But he could see how it was affecting Tony. He worried Tony really was considering his words and tensed slightly when Steve added; “You’ve never been able to recognise fiction from reality.” 

He growled low under his breath. He hadn’t forgotten Tony’s plea to not start a fight, he’d just stopped caring as his fingers charged up with a spell. 

Once again the dynamic between Tony and Steve was clear as day to him. How Rogers could control and manipulate Tony so easily. Rogers wasn’t as stupid as he appeared; he was intelligent enough to recognise Tony’s insecurities and exploit them. 

Stephen knew how Tony, despite everything, had an ingrained sense of inferiority when it came to the captain, no doubt thanks to Howards’ Stark idolisation of him. Which meant that from the very start Tony had to fight against the power imbalance between them. Even had to fight for a spot on the team because the redhead had spend two minutes with him and had decided he was an asshole. 

Before the spell had really formed, Tony had awoken from his anger-frozen state, and grabbed Stephen’s arm to stop him. He kept his gaze on the Captain, letting his hand slide down Stephen’s wrist and into his hand, linking their fingers to keep him calm. 

It worked, though Stephen wouldn’t admit to that. He wasn’t a preschooler. 

“You can still come back, Tony,” Romanoff now spoke. It was clear from her tone that she was going for a different tactic. Using sweet words and playing good cop, while purposefully eliciting his guilt. “You know how valuable you are to us. How many people we could save with your help.”

Stephen sneered at the redhead, and could see the other Avengers move closer to join their discussion. Banner was frowning at them as he made his way through the crowd. Tony had never spoken badly about him, but as he hadn’t done anything to stand up for Tony while he’d been part of their team, Stephen didn't consider him any better than the others. 

Just was they were about to pull Tony’s glare away from Rogers, the music stopped and the lights dimmed a little bit more, leading the crowd’s gaze towards the podium where Miss Potts was standing. 

With the way her eyes were fixed on their little group as she addressed the entire crowd politely, Stephen knew she’d purposefully distracted them. 

Stephen was grateful, glad she had disabled the bomb before it could go off, trying to keep Tony’s wish for a peaceful night. He had to remind himself the Avengers weren’t worth his anger, and he was glad that Tony used the moment of distraction to turn his back on them and let out a shuddering breath. 

Stephen wanted to comfort him, but there was something about Tony’s expression that was holding him back. 

“Good evening, everyone,” Miss Potts started, smiling brightly at the onlookers. With her hair neatly curled around her face and the blue dress she could easily be underestimated, but her eyes spoke of power, keeping her subordinates in check with barely a glance. “We don’t want to let any of you wait in suspense for much longer; the champagne is too good to go to waste. So without further ado, let’s hear from Tony Stark!”

People clapped enthusiastically, clearly thrilled to finally hear from the billionaire. Tony himself stepped forward without hesitation, reaching the podium easily as people parted to let him through. Stephen watched his every movement, looking for anything worrying. 

He was pleasantly surprised by what he found.

He didn’t look nervous or tense anymore, the darkness behind his eyes had shifted from anger to powerful determination, and Stephen felt a wave of awe wash over him. It was a side of him he hadn’t yet been allowed to see, every aspect of Tony he’d gotten to know making him even more and more beautiful. 

Forgetting about the Avengers completely, he stared up at the stage, feeling like a groupie as he hung on Tony’s every word, admiration and love coursing through him. 

“Good evening,” He started. He didn’t smile, didn’t stick to pleasantries, yet the audience didn’t seem to mind. There was no need, as by the end of the speech they’d probably be calling for his arrest. “I know there has been a lot of confusion going around about my work relationship with the Avengers. People have been speculating about the termination of SI’s contract with the Avengers, especially since their collaboration with Hammer Industries has become official.”

There was a small tug at Tony’s lip, like a tiny smirk, but it was enough of an incentive that Stephen noticed the people around him copy the movement, picking up Tony’s cue.

“I’m here to formally confirm I will no longer affiliate myself with the Avengers or stand behind their actions unless indicated otherwise.”

Stephen didn’t notice how the crowd reacted, didn’t notice the Avengers tensing up all around the room; he only had eyes for Tony. Recognised how the weight had been lifted off his shoulders as he had breathed out the words, and Stephen didn’t bother hiding the proud smile crawling over his lips. 

“For years I’ve dedicated myself to help as many people as possible and keep the people of Earth safe. I’ve found myself limited in this regard - and often achieving the opposite of what I’d set out to - when working with the Avengers. This is why, from now on, I will continue to strive towards my goals on my own terms.”

Stephen was proud to watch him, standing tall and confident on the podium. It was clear he was still pissed off by the slight glare in his eyes and the way he was watching straight into the crowd. It still irked Stephen that he couldn’t just rip Rogers’ head off, but he had to make do with looking over his shoulder to catch the horror in his eyes. It brought a satisfied smile to his face as he turned back to watch the billionaire speak. 

The watch on his wrist beeped quietly, causing Stephen’s grin to only broaden. He noticed how Tony reacted to the notification that had undoubtedly popped onto his glasses as well. 

EDITH had been successfully launched and was now orbiting the earth.

“I’ve found new allyship with the sorcerers of Kamar-Taj,” Tony, now fully relaxed as he continued speaking, glanced towards Stephen. The movement, accompanied with a quick wink, so subtle Stephen doubted anyone else would have caught it. “Which allows me to use all resources available and maximise my efforts in protecting as many people as possible.”

“I will not take any questions today. Thank you.”

* * *

Nevertheless, there was a roar of questions from the crowd, some in outrage at the mention of Tony working with known criminals, others in behalf of the Avengers. There were even a few in pure confusion. 

Tony didn’t pay them any attention, acting like there had been nothing strange about his speech.

But before Tony had even taken a step back, he noticed the Avengers rushing over towards him, faces filled with protest and anger at what he’d done. He wasn’t sure what they were most angry about; him working with the sorcerers, known criminals who’d cost hundreds of people their lives over the past few years, or the fact that he’d put the Avengers in a bad light.

Tony wouldn’t be surprised if it was the second option. In a matter of seconds, his good mood was already disintegrating, his satisfaction at finally standing up for himself fading as he recognised an argument would follow. 

He’d won. He was free of them. EDITH was patrolling their solar system. He wasn’t going to let that be ruined.

Yet, the thought of their anger still scared him, if only for the guilt that would follow if anyone were to get hurt because of their disagreement. Yes, some officials were already discussing what cell to put him in, but that was besides the point. 

He braced himself as he took the steps down the stage, but it turned out to be for naught as Stephen was there in a flash, intercepting him before the Avengers could reach them.

There was a small wave of Stephen’s hand that he barely caught, and with the movement it seemed everyone’s concern eased, the crowd quieting down as they went back to what they’d been doing before being interrupted by Pepper.

“What did you do?” He frowned at Stephen, glancing around them at the people who seemed to be enjoying themselves again, even the people from the NSA and FBI. 

“Just a little spell. It didn’t erase their memory, just delayed their outrage.”

“Why?” Tony frowned at him in confusion. Their whole purpose of the event had been to get EDITH launched without anyone noticing. As this had been accomplished, they could leave everyone to their opinion. By the time they’d make their minds up about whether or not Tony was a criminal now too, they’d be back in his loft in the city. 

“Care for a dance, mister Stark?” 

Tony let the question wash over him. Stephen’s low and sultry voice settled into his bones as he glanced down at his extended hand in surprise.

Stephen had successfully caught his attention, making his heart stop short as he sought out his soothing blue eyes as naturally as breathing. A glance towards the Avengers showed them blinking in confusion, clearly knowing something had changed but not being sure as to what exactly.

Tony could feel the tension in his shoulders easing as he gladly accepted the invitation, thoughts about the Avengers quickly pushed from his mind as the last drops of anger faded from his bloodstream. 

“Who knew you could be such a charmer?” The smirk was easy, comforting, natural. As he took Stephen’s hand, fingers tracing the back of Stephen’s palm, the contact still sparked; he would always make his heart race like nothing ever would.

“You did,” Stephen replied simply, the pride for that achievement obvious in his tone, making heat rise to Tony’s cheeks as he rolled his eyes. Yet, Tony couldn’t deny the statement, instead leaning up to press a kiss to Stephen’s cheek.

“Cocky.” Tony smiled as he started tugging him towards the dance floor, already crowded with couples, only turning back to wink at Stephen. “I like that in a man.”

“Don’t I know it.” Stephen was grinning now, pulling Tony back so he was the one leading them onto the dance floor.

They stopped in the middle of the room, hidden between the dancers, and Tony glanced around them quickly to take inventory of his people. 

He could see Vision already leading Wanda among the dancers, moving easily as the witch threw her head back and laughed at something he’d said.

It was a pairing Tony hadn’t expected, but it somehow made perfect sense to him - albeit in a weird kind of way. He’d seen how they’d interacted for years, so perhaps it was more of an inevitability than a serious understanding of their dynamic. Either way he was happy for them.

A quick look around for the teens showed them safe with Rhodey at the edge of the crowd. 

They still looked nervous, but they were smiling along with Rhodey’s words, and when they caught Tony’s eyes it was clear they were confused but happy about the crowd’s sudden calm.

The sight of Harley and Peter proved that he’d made the right decisions, that he’d ended where he’d wanted to. Before he hadn’t been able to spend the time he’d wanted with them, wanting to keep them as far away from the Avengers as possible.

Tony hadn’t really understood why. He just wanted to keep them safe and away from danger. Perhaps he’d just gotten more selfish since starting his relationship with Stephen, or maybe he’d trusted Stephen to protect them, or to at least care for their safety. 

In the end, Peter had met him before Tony could have had a say in keeping them away from each other, but he was glad for it. When he’d heard how well they’d gotten along. Perhaps that had been what had eased his worry. 

His focus was forced back to Stephen when the sorcerer pulled Tony close as a new song started, hand coming to rest on his hip, noses almost touching. Tony felt himself smile up at him, placing his hand on his shoulder as the other accepted Stephen’s. They started swaying, and looking up at Stephen, he could feel himself floating away. 

There were no people clumsily bumping into them, no buzz of over a hundred conversations, nothing but Stephen’s eyes and the music playing softly in the distance.

His mind was full with Stephen; Stephen in the dark, staring up at the ceiling, trying not to feel. Stephen’s hand tracing his brow when he’d thought Tony was asleep. Stephen reading in the library. Stephen pinning him against the mattress, Stephen puzzling with Sophia, Stephen playing the piano… 

Stephen’s beautiful skin and dark hair, the corner of his lips that was lightly pulled up, Stephen’s cologne clogging his senses, Stephen’s cold hand in his. 

Stephen’s eyes were staring down at him intently, studying him carefully with so much love it made Tony feel like he was back in Afghanistan and had a hand wrapped around his heart. Except this time a lot more pleasantly. 

The music changed. As he stared at Stephen he could see something shift behind his pupils, eyes filling with something close to regret as his brow tightened slightly, hand gripping his more firmly. 

Tony willed it to go away, didn’t want this moment to be ruined by Stephen’s fears and his doubts. He wanted this moment, for the both of them. 

So, he leaned closer, almost burying his face in Stephen’s neck so he didn’t have to look at his sadness anymore.

He started swaying them to the melody of the music, taking the lead as Stephen had stilled against him. Humming along, he decided he liked the song. As he let it bring a smile to his face as he sang along in Stephen’s ear, needing Stephen to hear it.

“_Thank you for the happiest year of my life.”_ Tony didn’t know the song, but the refrain was easy enough, repeating the words truthfully in Stephen’s ear. 

He could feel Stephen’s grip on his hip tightening, and for a second Tony was afraid Stephen would push him away. Instead the opposite happened, Stephen pressing him against him fully in a hug and kissing his temple.

Tony could feel the sadness had been replaced by something else, perhaps determination, and he smiled, satisfied with their position. 

There was the refrain again. Tony wasn’t really paying attention to the music, but whenever the words sounded around the hall he couldn’t help but sing them.

_Thank you for the happiest year of my life. _

The last year he’d been with Stephen had been far from perfect. There had been fights - both before and after their relationship had started - they’d had to hide, had to deal with horrible news and tons of stressors. 

Yet the moments of peace in between were more than he could have ever wished for. Everything had had a silver lining, a diamond found amongst the debris. 

He would have never gotten to spend so much time with the teens if it hadn’t been for his break with the Avengers. Their plan in Brussels had failed, but at least it meant Sophia had survived. The knowledge of what was to come was crippling, yet it meant they were prepared for the apocalypse.

None of it would have been possible without Stephen. 

Even without all that, all the pain would have been worth it just to spend one night in Stephen’s arms. 

And he’d gotten so much more. 

Stolen moments in between fights, their first date in the lounge, dinner at the sanctum, nights spend doing nothing but talking…

Looking back to before everything had started, he had to admit that even then, the moments on the battlefield where they’d been teasing each other had been some of his favourite memories. 

However twisted that may seem, the teasing, flirting, insulting each other,… It had all been a way to escape everything else going on around him. A moment of peace within the chaos, something to feel, even if it was anger. 

After all, Ares and Aphrodite had been lovers. Love and War creating Eros, god of passion.

Now he couldn’t imagine anything but love for Stephen, nothing but affection for the man who’d changed his life so drastically. 

The song changed into something a little more upbeat, and he pulled back from their hug. Stephen’s face was unsmiling, but affection shone through his eyes as he started leading Tony again. This time the dance was definitely more playful, pulling a smile onto Tony’s face as Stephen smirked before pushing him out before meeting each other in the middle again. 

A laugh was ripped from his throat and Stephen answered with a smile of his own.

Tony felt like he could stay in this moment forever.

He should have known that the fates wouldn’t be so kind.

Stephen pushed him out a second time, this time Tony knew what to expect, so the movement was smoother. 

Yet, before he’d reached Stephen again, he froze.

No. 

This was ridiculous.

There was no way in hell.

Stephen’s watch beeped as well, indicating that it wasn’t in fact all inside his head. That he wasn’t just imagining the notification on his glasses which read that a fleet of spaceships had just entered their solar system. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was a real bitch to write and I just needed to take a break to make sure I knew everything I wanted to happen in these last few chapters. (and the loose ends I still need to tie up)
> 
> also finishing projects is hard for me.
> 
> But my wonderful friend Paula whom I love with all my heart spent an hour proofreading this without having read any of the previous chapters or even being in the fandom. She's a real one 💕
> 
> Basically yelled about all my caesar sentences : (  
Still believe it's a *style* but whatever she's probably right


	33. inevitable

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In my defense: I had exams in June, meaning I only procrastinated for like a month
> 
> hope you're still interested 💕

Tony’s eyes locked on Stephen’s, the sorcerer feeling his own features harden as his heart shattered. They were frozen in the moment, everyone around them still moving and dancing and laughing, blissfully unaware of doomsday playing out right above their heads.

Stephen let his hand tighten around Tony’s. He was still holding it as they stood still in the middle of their interrupted dance.

They had prepared everything for tonight. They had planned every minute, considered every possibility, and deployed a billion contingencies.

Yet, none of them could have ever expected they would activate EDITH on the exact day Thanos would attack.

Barely a minute ago he’d been admiring the chocolate brown of Tony’s irises; had admired how prettily they looked out from underneath his long eyelashes in their small bubble of peace.

Now they were wide and afraid, silent in their frozen panic. It hurt to look at them; too painful a reminder of what was to come.

A moment before, he’d finally accepted that he needed to stop worrying about the future, fully dedicating himself to Tony’s presence. He’d finally realized that he needed to stop demanding more, and take what he could get. That he had to be grateful for every second he had already gotten and cherish every moment still to come.

It was too late now.

Stephen swallowed, and pulled his walls back up. Tony had done such an efficient job in tearing them down that putting them up again was like moving a mule - a fruitless effort. His mind and heart resisted, wanting to cling onto the love and happiness Tony had provided him over the last few months. Tony looked around them, clearly not sure what to do either. They were in a hall full of people and they needed to get the shield up ASAP.

But what comes next?

They hadn’t yet gotten the time to discuss what would happen after the shield was installed. They’d need more time.

The experiments with the stones weren’t completed; their best bet was the destruction of the mind stone, but whether or not Wanda would succeed in untangling the connection between Vision and the stone without destroying the android remained to be seen.

_They’d thought they’d get more time._

Their actual defensive line this far existed of the sorcerers of Kamar Taj. They were strong and plentiful, but would it be enough to fight back against the legion coming towards them?

Some of the most powerful people on the planet were in the room with them, yet should they include them in their fight? Should they be trusted not to make things worse?

Stephen wasn’t good with trust. He’d never been able to rely on anyone’s hands but his own, no matter how much they trembled. He’d always been a bit of a control freak, always so sure that he himself was the most capable person in the room. Would that be his savior or his downfall? 

“Stephen,” Tony’s panic had shifted towards acceptance way faster than Stephen would have thought possible, his battle instincts kicking in as he tapped away at his watch. “Activate the shield.”

They locked eyes again. Tony looked determined and strong - _beautiful_ \- and Stephen tried to let it fuel him, borrowing from Tony’s strength. Tony squeezed his hand and nodded in reassurance. Stephen couldn’t believe Tony was able to keep himself together, while Stephen felt like falling apart, but he tried to follow his example.

If there was any chance at both of them making it out of this... _scratch that. _

He _had_ to let him go. Had to accept that this was it. 

He needed to protect earth; had to make sure that if Tony wouldn’t make it, at least the people Tony cared about would be safe. It’s the least he could do for him after all the pain Stephen had already brought into his life.

Perhaps this truly was what the universe wanted; inevitable and cruel.

It was time for him to finally accept that.

Stephen squeezed Tony’s hand as Tony nodded again, bracing himself as he told himself this was goodbye. This was all he’d get; a mere touch of his hand as he stared in Tony’s eyes for possibly the last time.

He let go right as the fire alarms went off.

Tony didn’t seem surprised, indicating it had been his doing. He stepped away from Stephen, letting him do what he needed to. Stephen felt the loss of his hand immediately as the world was suddenly a lot colder, but he forced himself to turn around and face the crowd.

The guests were already running, screaming as they scuttled towards the exits, the earlier spell breaking as their panic rose. It was clear no one believed the alarm was a simple fire - not with the Avengers in the room.

He stepped towards the middle of the hall, forming the spell as he went.

The blast hit the middle of the ceiling, right in the mosaic of a flaming sun, and just like that the roof disappeared. Stephen could see the sky clearly now, the stars still shining brightly like everything was normal. Yet, despite Stephen’s limited knowledge of astronomy, he could easily recognize there were more lights than were normal.

Stephen recognized Cassiopeia easily, always having been one of his favorites due to the story behind it. But to its left, Andromeda was unrecognizable by extra stars that shouldn’t be there. They seemingly shone brighter by the second, getting closer to earth with dedicated precision, their course, and destination clear.

He focused next on what they’d practiced.

EDITH should already be in place as Tony had coded the different pods to spread out over the globe. He could feel the magic in them; every pulse emitted from each core as they moved in unison. The spell wasn’t complicated, but it asked for a lot of energy. He focused as he went through the movements, praying it wouldn’t take too much of his strength; he had a feeling he would need everything he had, tonight.

Despite his concentration, he could feel Wanda step up next to him. Waves of power radiated off her as she too spoke the memorized words. Her intention was clear; performing the spell together would preserve much of their energy, allowing both of them to recharge more quickly for the fight to come.

He was grateful for her then, glad he’d - and especially Tony - had made the right decision in trusting her. There was a lot he could learn from Tony - love, and loyalty being only a few examples.

It took a moment for the spell to reach the pod closest to their position on earth, but as soon as it had hit its mark he could see the result. Waves of energy sprawled out over the atmosphere, like golden aurora borealis, forming a web of fire over the earth, a shield of which Stephen could feel the power emanating into his very being.

Despite not knowing whether it would hold, whether it would be enough, he smiled. A glance at Tony behind him, standing next to Harley and Peter who refused to leave his side, showed him staring at his creation in awe.

It was clear that no matter what would happen tonight, the sight of it had been a moment of peace and relief for the engineer. The satisfaction of an achievement he’d been working towards for years; the armor around the world he’d dreamt of every night since New York.

Stephen had to look away. He took the few strides separating him from the teens, focusing on them, instead. Harley and Peter were looking at the sky as well, determination badly concealing the fear in their eyes.

“I’m creating a portal to the penthouse. Tell May and -,”

“We’re not leaving! We can help!” Peter gawked at him, glancing between him and Tony, who stopped staring at the sky when he heard their commotion.

“You’re children!”

“You trained me! You know I can help!”

“I remember beating you quite often.”

“Come on! What’s the point anyway; you need all the help you can get!”

By the Vishanti, he had a point there. He couldn’t help feel annoyed, though it was more at their predicament than at Peter. He hated being pushed into corners, forced to make decisions he didn’t want to make. It’s what had made him a great surgeon - no, what had kept him from being one. It’s why he refused to treat ‘untreatable’ patients. He’d searched for the ones he could help, the ones who’d be saved by a risky procedure he knew he could nail.

Patients who had _options_, where he would get praised for choosing the right one.

“Harley! You don’t even have a suit,” he turned on him instead, hoping to at least send one less kid into battle. Harley had been quiet until now, eyes fixated on Tony, but they switched to Stephen in protest as he was addressed.

“I do! I made my own!”

Stephen rolled his eyes, anxiety welling up underneath his skin, already realizing he wasn’t going to win. “I’m sure you can forgive me for not having full faith in your skills right now.”

“It’s good! Tony already checked over most of it and FRIDAY approved the rest! I’m _not_ leaving!”

“I did.” Tony stepped up next to him, placing a comforting hand on Stephen’s shoulder. “And as much as I hate it... they’re right.”

Tony turned back towards the teens, looking at each one in turn. “But you stick to the outskirts of the fight! No heroism or unnecessary risks! And if at any point, I do tell you to leave, you leave. No questions, no reasoning; just go.”

“Fine,” Peter immediately agreed, clearly relieved he got to stick with them for a little while longer.

Stephen understood them of course, wouldn’t want to sit on the sidelines either if Tony were in danger, but it took away from his ability to watch over the fight. He had already let go of the hope that Tony would make it out alive, but now he’d have to worry about Harley and Peter instead; his goal for doomsday had to be their safety. He had to make sure nothing bad happened to them while trying to prevent Thanos’ goal from being realized.

Nevertheless, he had no choice but to agree to let the teens stay. Peter had already deployed his suit.

“Fine,” he huffed, turning to Tony next. “Let May and Happy know they can take Sophia into the sanctum basement. There’s a safe room protected with spells. It will keep them out of harm’s way.”

“Way ahead of you,” he smiled sadly, tapping his glasses. Stephen assumed that meant Sophia was protected at least, which was only a meager comfort as he knew no spell could hold back the effects of the united stones.

The shield up in the sky was still glowing brightly, but before Stephen could get lost in its hypnotic pulsing, his attention was pulled towards the group of Avengers quickly closing in on them. It was about time they got over their shock, Stephen thought, and make themselves useful by leaving.

Stephen grabbed his sling-ring, needing to get rid of them. But once again, Tony stopped him; “We need them.”

Stephen hated the feeling curling in his chest. _Doubt_. 

He’d never been one to second guess his decisions, but he couldn’t help question his every choice now. Yes or no? Avengers or not? Was he agreeing to let the Avengers stay the key to Tony’s death? Or was it the lack of extra help that did them in?

Stephen hated it, and as he couldn’t trust his own judgment - too terrified of being the one to put Tony in his grave - he allowed Tony to take the lead. This was _his_ battle, which meant he deserved to be the one making the calls, to decide how and with whom he’d make his final stand.

He thought of Wanda, how but five minutes ago he’d been grateful for Tony’s decision of trust, so Stephen nodded as he took a step back. He had to allow Tony to take center stage and had to accept his role as a supporting character.

The rest of the night went by in a blur. The Avengers were filled in - Stephen vaguely recalled Rogers’ anger and confusion, but the rest of the Avengers quickly fell in line behind Tony’s leadership. Stephen guessed they were used to last-minute calls to arms and shifting commands, and with the first attacks starting - the blasts luckily blocked by the shields - there wasn’t much time for discussion.

It all came down to Wanda needing to destroy the mind stone. It wasn’t a perfect tactic and the destruction definitely wouldn’t fix anything, but at least it would prevent the worst.

The cloak of Levitation appeared, and Stephen was glad to feel its weight as it wrapped around his shoulders and squeezed. Stephen used a spell to change into his usual robes and turned to welcome his fellow sorcerers as they had arrived - most likely it had been their portals the cloak had snuck through.

“Wizard!” Stephen glared at Thor as the god caught his attention, but he didn’t seem affected by it. He allowed the man to speak with a curt nod. “The shield won’t hold if Thanos already has the power stone. It will allow him to bend its energy. Or simply snap it out of existence using the Reality Stone.”

Stephen hated this day.

A hand landed on his arm, and Stephen would have blasted it to pieces if he hadn’t recognized it as Tony’s.

“We always knew it would be a temporary fix,” Tony soothed him, but Stephen knew he was unnerved as well. “We just need to use the little time we have to get into position and get the jump on him.”

Easier said than done.

“I just got an interesting call.” As the words came from Rhodes, Stephen allowed them to bring him hope, if only the tiniest bit. He turned to face him, the man’s expression grim. He’d suited up since the last time Stephen had seen him. “Can you make a portal to this location? Reinforcements are, apparently, already waiting on us.”

Rhodes projected a hologram from his wrist, showing an empty courtyard of sorts, the building surrounding it the perfect blend of classic and modern. He fought back the urge to snap ‘I’m not your chauffeur’, recognizing it to be stupid and childish at the moment. He was getting skittish; the battle must already be getting under his skin - or rather the wait for the battle to start.

He did as told. Rhodes had been right about reinforcements waiting for them. A few hundred people were dressed ready for battle, and more Stephen couldn’t see were spread out over the fields beyond the walls. They seemed to be from an African country Stephen didn’t recognize, and he turned to Rhodey with a questioning, but impressed eyebrow raise.

“I met King T’Chaka during a UN meeting. He seemed to recognize a battle was to come and offered his support.”

The first to step through the portal was a young man, though at a second glance he seemed to be around his age. He was the only one dressed in a black suit, a necklace-like string of metal teeth gleaming over his chest.

“Prince T’Challa,” he introduced himself. His expression was smug but inviting. Stephen could tell the tilt of his lip was at home on his face, like a mischievous schoolboy. Stephen would know; he had worn the same expression for years. Prince T’Challa’s looked less arrogant, however. Instead, he gave off a self-aware but charming vibe. “Our satellites were notified of ships nearing our atmosphere. The kingdom of Wakanda offers its assistance.”

Stephen didn’t bother with pleasantries, but Tony stepped forward and took the lead, clearly versed in dealing with royalty. He introduced himself and the others, though Stephen was glad to see he quickly switched over to discussing their battle tactic and the aim of the fight. There was no time to lose, after all, and Stephen was an impatient man.

As if having read his mind, another explosion sounded overhead, urging them to talk faster, drop unnecessary details, and get into position.

The fields behind the event building weren’t ideal for a fight, but they’d have to suck up their complaints. At least it’s far from any towns or farms, Stephen thought as he glanced over the grass spread out for miles. On any other day, it would have been a lovely view; the dark green grass illuminated by the golden waves of energy and the night sky beyond.

Tonight it just looked haunting.

Stephen directed the sorcerers to open more gateways to welcome their allies onto the battlefield, as Tony turned to his own team, ready to guide them into battle. He’d already returned their old equipment, recognizing Hammer tech to be a liability and a hazard - Cap’s ‘shield’ had a dent in it.

“Listen, everyone,” Tony spoke up, voice amplified by his suit. “At any moment Thanos can break through the barrier. Our main objective is to hold their armies back until Wanda can extract the mind stone. According to Thor, the space stone is still secure on Asgard. Worst case scenario, Thanos already has the other three stones. Two _has_ to be enough to beat him.”

“Why not get the Tesseract from Asgard, then,” Bruce asked, hands twitching in front of him. “I prefer the odds of three against three.”

“We can’t spare Thor,” Tony grimaced, “besides, it would be like giving Thanos a three-in-one deal.”

“Asgard stands strong,” Thor agreed, face grim as he stepped forward and examined the battlefield. “Three stones wouldn’t be enough to break through its defenses - not without fatally weakening his army. I assume that’s why he chose to attack Earth first.”

Right then, a power surge boomed over the field, throwing their troops off-balance. Stephen’s stomach dropped as the shield above took the impact instead of bouncing it back, absorbing it as it burned away at the shield like a flame forming a ring of fire in a piece of paper.

Once the hole was of decent size, the shield disappeared completely, the energy replaced by bubbles as they faded off towards the stars.

Tony’s life work, so easily ripped away… It fuelled Stephen with anger, his veins buzzing with determination as he felt like ripping someone’s head off. He preferred studying, but he was good at fighting, enjoyed the adrenaline, and until this moment he’d been too worried about Tony to treasure the anticipation of a good opponent. Now he felt ready for battle.

When Stephen eventually looked back down, and the first of the enemy armies appeared on the field in front of them, he turned to find Tony watching him. His eyes spoke of fear but determination, of love but goodbyes, still desperately searching for any kind of reassurance that his actions were righteous.

Stephen felt like a fraud - for who was he to give Tony that reassurance, to lead him into battle with false confidence - but he nodded nevertheless. He couldn’t help himself. It was too late to explain his hesitation or instill in him that he was just as clueless as the rest of them… but he had a feeling Tony knew. That he wasn’t asking for his intel but merely for his comfort, his presence, and the confirmation that he would stick by him in battle. That they had each other’s back. No matter what.

Tony’s smile was almost imperceptible, and Stephen tried to hold onto the image as they turned away from each other.

* * *

Stephen lost track of Tony almost instantaneously.

The Avengers formed the front lines, the Wakandan army, and the sorcerers spread out behind them while Wanda worked with Vision. Stephen couldn’t care less about the android. If it were up to him he would have already been blasted to pieces with the mind stone destroyed.

But Stephen couldn’t be that selfish anymore. Couldn’t see the world that black and white. He, himself, had been forced to make that choice. He had to give up a loved one for the sake of the universe, and he’d stalled and procrastinated. He’d searched every possibility for a chance at a better outcome.

So, he couldn’t blame Wanda for doing the same.

Yes, eventually he’d had to accept the inevitable, but only because he’d considered every other option and hadn’t been able to find a solution.

He would grant her a chance to do the same.

Either way, he couldn’t think too much about it. The battle raged on, keeping his mind occupied as he formed spell after spell. The Wakandan army truly proved themselves capable fighters, keeping up with the alien troops and advancing against their enemies with little but their skills and weapons. The sorcerers were spread between defense and offense, shielding as many of their own as possible.

Rhodes and Wilson flew overhead, attacking the back of the enemy army through artillery fire.

They were actually winning for a while. Adrenaline surging through all of them as they kept advancing, pushing the enemies back and leaving alien corpses in their wake. Stephen stuck to the back of the fight, wanting to have a decent overview and watch over Harley and Peter as they had the fighters’ backs. He used spells to protect, turned back time if he could - fuck the consequences - and reserved his energy so he could build up to a bigger spell every once in a while, pushing the enemy forces back a few steps. It gave their fighters a moment to breathe before continuing their battle. All the while Stephen was fuelled by his anger, his annoyance, his love for Tony, and his grief. He battled as he’d never done before, remembered every useful spell he’d ever read, and used all of it to press their advantage. 

That was until the Titan finally thought it time to intervene, appearing in a beam of light in the middle of the field. For a second, it seemed like all fighting stopped, the scene was frozen as everyone - friend or foe alike - turned to watch his arrival. He wasn’t anything like Stephen had imagined. Whatever he’d expected, it wasn’t this. He looked like a purple Hulk; pure muscle covered in armor that reminded him of Roman gladiators. A creature so evil shouldn’t be able to smile that wide.

The scene unfroze as a bolt of lightning struck the Titan, but Thanos was faster. He snapped his fingers, redirecting it onto their ranks. The first ones moving again were Rogers and Wilson, and Stephen was content to let them exhaust themselves against their enemy. Except, it wasn’t long before Tony moved towards them.

“_Of course_,” Stephen grumbled as he saw Tony go up against the giant. As they had feared, three stones already glistened in his gauntlet. Every once in awhile, one of them lit up, which was followed by a blast of light pushing them back, or breaking their reality.

“Wong,” Stephen caught his friends’ attention, the older sorcerer fighting beside him. He yelled in confirmation that he was listening. “Watch the kids!”

Once he got assurance that Harley and Peter would be watched over, Stephen joined the fight against Thanos.

It was only when he landed in front of him that he realized he was breaking his own strategy of leaving Tony to fend for his own.

He knew Tony was capable, more than anyone, and that Stephen’s mission was to A, protect the teens, and B, keep the time stone safe. Yes, he’d covered Harley and Peter’s safety, for he trusted Wong more than anyone in this world besides Tony, but here he was bringing attention to himself. It would take but a second for Thanos to realize he was the holder of the time stone. He should have ignored his instinct.

Tony glanced at him at his approach, barely distracted for a minute before putting his full focus on the fight again, the suit making up for his slip in attention.

They battled side by side against a common enemy for once. It would have been a nice moment, but Stephen was still too sane of mind to consider that way of thinking right now.

Yet, Tony was _magnificent_ \- he recognized that at least. He fought and outwitted, fell, and got back up again. Time and time again, he showed his genius, his brilliance, his resilience. The suit updates he’d been working on for the last few weeks clearly paid off; the nanotech was more advanced than ever, carrying firepower Stephen would have thought impossible.

But that’s what Tony did, wasn’t it? Make the impossible possible.

_Anything is possible when properly motivated_, Tony had told him before their first date.

And they were motivated, alright.

Stephen twisted his hands in front of him. The light of the spell illuminated Thanos in front of him, the Cloak wrapped around his gauntlet keeping him from using the stones. He yelled for everyone else to get out of the way. Tony obeyed at once, sidestepping so he was behind him, watching his back. Rogers and Wilson needed more motivation, but glanced at each other and did as told once the fifty Stephen’s were circling them.

He watched from Thanos’ left as the metal bands curled out from his many duplicates. The Cloak flew out of the way before right before they grabbed a hold of Thanos’ arms, keeping him incapacitated. Tony was there in a second, nanotech shaped into a blade as he moved for his neck.

Before it would hit its mark, however, Thanos’ army came to his rescue. The many aliens attacked Stephen’s duplicates until the ropes had lost its grip enough. Thanos twisted free easily after that, turning to his left swiftly and grabbing Stephen by the torso.

He wheezed as he was thrown back, rubble digging into his shoulder. The Titan loomed over him as he growled and ripped the eye off his chest, crushing it into his palm. “A _fake_. I know it’s not far; surrender it now and I may yet spare your life.”

Before he could say anything in turn, a tickling sensation started at his wrist. Thanos seemed confused at the smile that crawled over his lips, despite his throat slowly being squeezed shut. His frown quickly turned into a scowl as the nano suit covered Stephen fully. It gave him the strength and opportunity he needed. The outside of the suit grew hot and burned at Thanos’ flesh until he was forced to release his hold. Not even a second later, the Cloak came for him, gripping onto his shoulders and pulling him out from underneath the Titan. He was already shifting his hands in a new spell, but it faded into stars before it could hit its mark against Thanos’ chest.

Rogers was there in a second, engaging Thanos so Stephen could take a breath.

“I took the liberty of activating your suit,” Tony yelled from where he was holding back Thanos’ allies. Stephen could hear the smile in his voice, despite the fact they were mid-battle. “Hope you don’t mind.”

“Not at all,” Stephen replied dryly. “Like what you see?”

“You know I do.”

Stephen smirked as they continued fighting, pushing back against their enemies together. Some aliens seemed intelligent enough, while others were more like rabid dogs; all teeth and hungry to kill.

They slashed through all of them, throwing spell after spell, Tony’s technology blending perfectly with his magic as they formed a formidable team.

To his left, Wakandan warriors were getting overwhelmed. Stephen turned to aid them, freeing them from underneath the aliens’ claws and shielding them for a moment of reprieve. 

He’d only turned his back for a second when a guttural sound made Stephen freeze. The rest of the battle faded away as horror made his blood run cold before he’d even dared to look. He found the Titan standing behind him, Tony speared on his own blade, eyes wide in shock.

Stephen felt the wound like it was his own, could feel the burning pain as it worked its way through his chest and abdomen. He couldn’t speak, couldn’t protest as his mouth fell open in a silent scream. He was frozen in place, scared to move as he watched Tony choke on his blood. Nanites were scattered over the ground like blood, pieces of Tony’s suit ripped off to leave him vulnerable.

No matter how many times he'd seen it before - how Tony’s many deaths haunted his nightmares - it would never fail to make his heart crumble.

Thanos pulled the sword back. Stephen instinctively reached out but couldn’t do anything to help as Tony cried out in pain and fell to the ground; limp like a puppet whose strings had been cut.

Thanos stood still, triumphant expression on his face as he watched Stephen carefully. His grin was wide and sickening, making Stephen’s stomach roil as he glared at him. His eyes were burning, could feel tears tickling the corners, and he couldn’t look at Tony. Couldn’t meet his eyes.

Instead, he focused his hatred on Thanos.

“The stone… for his life.” The Titan smiled, eyes filled with fake pity, and Stephen burned from the inside out.

He had faced this decision a million times over. Yet, just as before, it was impossible to make.

His love versus the future of the Earth. 

Tony and a chance at saving the world.

It would have been such an easy choice to make if it wasn’t for the fact that Tony’s love was lost either way. He knew Tony would never forgive him for choosing him over the universe, and he knew that Tony would only suffer under the weight of his own guilt.

Death was mercy in so many ways, Thanos had been right about that.

Tony’s cruel fate was inevitable.

“I’m sorry,” he croaked out, exhausted by the weight of his own choice. Tony nodded as if he understood, though Stephen knew he didn’t. He shook his head as he repeated. “I’m _so_ sorry.”

His eyes locked on Tony in one last, silent apology, before he called on his powers.

He summoned the Time stone from where it had been hidden among the stars.

“Stephen!” Tony groaned as he tried to reach out to stop him, voice tight with warning and incredulity. “Don’t!”

The shards that were Stephen’s heart trembled from the betrayal in Tony’s voice, but he was already dull to its pain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _ring ... ring... ring ..._
> 
> follow me on tumblr @funkylittlebidiot for info over next updates


	34. dandelions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s been too long!!! I’m really sorry but there’s a law that states I can’t do anything until it’s ‘the right time to do that thing TM’ and I have no idea whenever that time will be. 
> 
> Anyway, I'm really excited to give you all a new update! There are a few loyal followers of this story and I at least wanted to make sure they weren’t left hanging. It’s only going to be two (or possibly three) chapters after this, so it probably won’t be too long of a wait until it’s finished completely! I hope you enjoy this chapter! 
> 
> 💕💕💕

_It was dark around them; the battleground lit up only by the constant onslaught of spells and the flashes of superhuman powers and alien weapons. Stephen felt the force fighting against his strength as he tried to hold up the wall of water in front of him. _

_Worse than the strain on his hands was the ball of dread in his stomach, his major arteries twisting around his heart and squeezing it into a pulp. He felt breathless like he was standing inside of the water instead, helpless as he watched through a rippling tide, the pressure bearing down on him and pulling him into its depths. _

_He didn't know where the water had come from, didn't know where they were, and yet the logo on the debris a little further away looked familiar. _

_Stephen recognized it from one of Tony's abandoned project files, something he'd seen fleetingly way back when Tony and his relationship had only been an idea in the back of his head. Back then, he'd been an invisible intruder in his personal space instead of an invited guest. Tony had told him eventually what the project had entailed, but Stephen knew that Tony hadn't opened it in months - had given up on the notion along with his team._

_The team that was now fighting alongside them, though Stephen, for the life of him, couldn't remember why. Couldn't figure out if they'd forgiven them, if the sorcerers had been the one having earned forgiveness, or if they'd come to a begrudging truce, pooling their strengths to fight a common enemy._

_Whatever the reason had been, Stephen knew they'd been mistaken to rely on them. He could see them standing around useless while the love of his life once again stared the Titan down on his own._

_That despite the gods and superhumans in their midst, it was Tony who was making the final stand. _

_Stephen knew what was waiting for him, knew the pain in his chest would only multiply as he couldn't stop watching. He couldn't move; utterly powerless as he watched the only person that mattered sacrifice himself for an unworthy universe._

_He wanted to look away. He didn't want to see it happen, but his eyes would have only gone to Peter, and he wasn't convinced that watching the spiderling's reaction to the death of his father figure would be any better. _

_He didn't want this to be the last image he had of Tony - didn't want his last memory of him to be his death - but that was still better than never seeing him again. He needed those extra minutes, even if it meant never being able to shake them from his nightmares. _

_Tony didn't look at him, stubbornly keeping his eyes on the enemy as he held up his hand. The six glittering stones in his gauntlet illuminated the determination on his face._

_Stephen knew he was scared, could read every line of Tony's expression as it shifted with terrified uncertainty. He knew it would hurt, knew it would leave him alone and broken, and Stephen wanted to stop it – wanted to hold him close and protect him from all of it - but he was stuck._

_ And all he could do was watch._

_"I am … "_

_Stephen's head snapped up as a force came out of nowhere, the impact barrelling against his leg. He took a step back out of sheer bewilderment, trying to focus back on the present. When he noticed he couldn't move his left leg, Stephen glanced down, glad to see he hadn't, in fact, become paralyzed. Sophia was holding onto him, smiling up at him with her bright blue eyes._

_A look around showed he was standing in one of the reading rooms of the sanctum. He was holding a book in his hands, though it felt like he'd picked it up ages ago, unable even to remember the title or why he'd needed it in the first place._

_"Hello," Stephen greeted the little girl. A smile easily formed as he looked down at her, despite the pressure in his chest and the memories still weighing his spirits down. Putting the book back on its shelf, he freed his hands so he could scoop Sophia up, placing her on his hip instead. _

_The child seemed satisfied with this, happily throwing her arms around his neck. _

_It was still surprising that she seemed to like him, possibly even enjoyed his company, and was always excited to see him. Perhaps that was just part of her personality – being open to everyone around her – or maybe that was just the simplicity of being a child, able to like and trust even the most undeserving of souls._

_Even more shocking to him was that he enjoyed her company as well._

_He couldn't help it; it was nice to have such an endless source of positivity around, someone who was always excited and wasn't aware of the end of the world looming over them. Sophia formed both a distraction from what was to come and hope for a life after it. A reminder that if by some miracle the dust would settle with everyone still standing, they'd have something to come home to, something to fight for._

_He also couldn't deny how happy she made Tony. How wonderful of a parent Tony already was._

_But that hadn't come as a surprise to Stephen in the least. _

_"What are you doing here, little Miss?"_

_"Tony's mean," she pouted against his neck, and Stephen raised an eyebrow at the response, searching around the room until he found Tony standing in the doorway. He was wearing a suit, suggesting he'd probably had a meeting earlier in the day. Stephen had left too early to know for sure, as he'd wanted a head start on checking today's timelines. _

_The engineer rolled his eyes, stepping further into the room as he explained. "Sophia doesn't want to take her nap."_

_"Not tired!" The muffled voice sounded against the collar of his robes._

_"So, what do you expect me to do?" Stephen frowned at the engineer as he moved to sit on one of the couches spread around the room. He felt Tony's glare on him as he fell against the green cushions, and Sophia squirmed until she was sitting next to him, tucked happily into his side._

_"Well, hanging out with me is obviously too exciting, so I thought she'd have a better chance of being bored to sleep around you." Tony grinned despite Stephen rolling his eyes at him, and Stephen ignored him as he turned towards Sophia instead._

_"We're so going to prove him wrong." He muttered to her, the little girl smiling sleepily at him though Stephen doubted she'd caught their banter. "We're going to read about ancient Mesopotamian magic."_

_Despite the word 'magic' having sparked her interest, it barely took ten minutes of reading from the book he'd conjured from one of the many bookshelves before she was dozing peacefully on his lap. Tony looked up from his spot on the opposite couch as Stephen stopped and put the book down, and Stephen rolled his eyes at his smug grin. _

_Tony had been doing something on his phone as he'd let Stephen lull Sophia to sleep, but he quickly tossed it aside now, excitement sparkling over his features. _

_His eyes followed the engineer as he stood up, walking around the coffee table before he sat down on Stephen's opposite side, leaning into him as he whispered a sincere thank you. _

_Stephen couldn't help smiling at him now, automatically pulled closer towards the engineer's body heat, letting his presence calm his nerves. _

_"You missed lunch," Tony continued, shifting until his arm was resting on the back of the couch behind Stephen, eyes never once leaving Stephen's face. Fighting against the blush threatening to break onto his face at his attention, he leaned into Tony, hand still absentmindedly carding through Sophia's hair. _

_"I lost track of time," Stephen explained vaguely, gaze dropping to the floor as he tried to stop the tidal wave of memories popping up from where they were lurking right underneath the surface of his consciousness. _

_Every timeline this far had been horrible, but that didn't mean that some weren't worse than others, and that morning had been exceptionally terrible. He'd gone too deep perhaps, so desperate to find at least one timeline with a happy ending that he'd let himself get pulled in. Resulting in him getting too close to the feelings and emotions of the Stephens in those realities. _

_When Tony didn't respond, didn't comment, he let his eyes shift back towards his, finding dark brown irises full of worry and understanding. _

_Seeing the engineer frown was the last thing Stephen needed, however, so instead, he inched his face closer, noticing Tony's eyes shift down towards his lips before he fulfilled Stephen's request. _

_Stephen tried to revel in it, wanted to let it consume him, and let it chase away the horrible feelings he'd experienced that morning. It helped a little bit, Tony's mouth his safe space as he pushed past his lips and grabbed at Tony's hair, pressing him closer against him still. _

_He wanted to drown in him, let the warmth of his feelings for Tony overwhelm him entirely until there was nothing to do but beg for air. _

_Their kisses died out naturally, turning into lazy pecks before they leaned back fully, soft smiles on their faces. The memories hadn't disappeared completely, but at least Tony was smiling, face smooth and eyes warm, and that on its own was doing plenty to soothe the images of his many deaths. _

_"I have something for you," Tony spoke quietly, trying not to rouse Sophia. That piqued Stephen's interest, tilting his head in question as he could already feel the smile pulling at his lips. "Can you make a portal to my lab?"_

_"There's a door downstairs," Stephen quipped at once, unimpressed as Tony rolled his eyes._

_"Come on! What good is a sorcerer boyfriend if you still have to take stairs?"_

_Stephen scoffed slightly, leaning forward to press another kiss to Tony's lips. Reminding him just exactly 'why he had a wizard boyfriend' as he possessively pinched his lower lip with his teeth. _

_Yet he caved anyway, not really looking forward to having Tony leave his side even if it was for something as stupid as running down to get something. _

_Stephen really was getting too attached despite his own will._

_Either way, he carefully stood up, taking care not to wake Sophia, as he grabbed his sling ring from where he'd left it on a desk a little further away. _

_By the time it took for Tony to grab whatever it was he'd needed, Stephen had shifted towards the small kitchenette next to the reading room, making sure Sophia wouldn't be bothered as he made himself a cup of tea. He'd called out to the cloak, the fabric now draped over the little girl protectively._

_While he was pouring the boiling water into his mug, he noticed Tony come up next to him, pulling himself up, so he was sitting on the counter, smiling down at Stephen._

_"So?" Stephen asked, blowing on his drink as he turned to face Tony with a small smirk, hip leaning against the counter. "What do you have?"_

_"Well…" Tony seemed almost hesitant now, and it made Stephen stop short, lowering his mug and placing it back down as he grabbed one of Tony's hands instead. It had been to comfort his own worry at seeing Tony's doubt, but it clearly settled the engineer as well as he continued more easily. "I made you something…"_

_That wasn't surprising at all; making things was what he did. Stephen used his finger to tilt Tony's head up, so his gaze met his. Tony sighed as their eyes locked, tension fading out of his shoulders as he smiled bashfully instead._

_"I made you a suit," he sighed nervously, holding out something that reminded Stephen of a watch. Stephen stared, dumbfounded as Tony pressed the bracelet into his hands, words edging on a ramble as he continued. "I made it, so it fits your style of fighting, and you can move around easily in it. I know it's probably nothing compared to your artifacts or whatever, but the cloak can attach to it easily, and I just… I wanted you to be protected. _I_ wanted to protect you… for as much as I can."_

_The watch was smooth, fitting easily around his wrist as he tried it on, and he softly pressed his fingers against the material, not knowing what to say. His brain was quiet and loud at the same time, like the sound of a broken dog whistle. _

_Eventually, he finally managed to progress his feelings when Tony placed a hesitant hand on his cheek, thumb stroking softly over his cheekbone to catch a tear that had managed to escape his eyes. _

_He hated this._

_Hated it._

_Hated how Tony was worried about him, about him getting hurt when Stephen _knew_ he wouldn't. When Stephen couldn't care less about himself as long as Tony was okay. He knew that no armor would be able to protect him from the pain to come._

_And it was so ironic that Stephen couldn't help let out a wet chuckle as he looked up to meet Tony's worried gaze. "You really want to control everything, huh? I thought the point was us trying to accept that we couldn't."_

_"This I can control," Tony spoke with determination, having realized Stephen wasn't upset with him for making him a suit. "Or I can at least try. Please, darling, I can't lose you."_

_It took all Stephen had not to lose it right then and there, to not break down altogether, but he swallowed it all down, fixing his gaze on Tony. He tried to take him in, and hold onto his hand, hold onto the only person he'd ever loved this deeply. The person the universe was intent on ripping away from him. "Fine, if it makes you feel better."_

_He hadn't seen this in the timelines this morning… and he couldn't shake that stupid hope that this was it, that this tiny change would make the difference, would give them the advantage they so desperately needed._

_He had promised Tony he'd only check the timelines in the mornings, and he wasn't going to go back on his promise. Especially seeing as he recognized why Tony had set the rule in the first place._

_This bracelet hadn't been the first time he'd felt like rechecking the timelines; knew that if it hadn't been for Tony, he'd check the eye with every decision he made. With every dinner, every word said, and every second spent away, he'd be hoping and praying that somewhere in the world, someone had made the ultimate change to re-establish their fate into something brighter. _

_Yet, Stephen knew deep down it was hopeless. Stephen was never in danger. Somehow he always made it through unscathed, with only a broken heart to show for the previous battle. _

_Stephen was destined to suffer; he just had to learn to live with it._

_He pulled Tony's hand towards him, pressing a kiss to the inside of his palm as he looked up at him with tired eyes. The battle was yet to begin, but it seemed a certain despondency had already washed over the sorcerer. _

_"Hey," Tony whispered, eyes still fixed on Stephen's, which swam back into focus at his attention. "I love you. We'll be okay."_

_Stephen so desperately wanted to say it back, wanted to express the heat in his stomach, the way the feelings in his chest made him breathless. But he couldn't. Instead, he merely hummed in acknowledgment but pulled tony closer, wrapping his arms around his waist and pressing his face into his stomach._

* * *

Tony watched, chest throbbing and stomach twisting as Stephen handed the time stone over to Thanos. He needed to do something - to stop him - but he was helpless, unable to move as he watched his nightmare of the last few years come true. Night after night, he'd had the same visions; saw the world suffer by his hand. Somehow reality still felt worse than anything his mind could have conjured up. 

The stone glowed brighter as it was placed in its notch on the gauntlet, claiming its place amongst its siblings. He couldn't hold back a pained gasp, his lungs seemingly collapsing in on themselves as he struggled for air. For just a second, he'd forgotten about his injuries, but he was painfully reminded of their presence as they burned and protested his every movement. 

"Tony?" Stephen's voice sounded pained and worried, and Tony only noticed through a thick fog of delirium when Stephen kneeled on the ground in front of him. His hand reached up to cup his face, and for just a moment, Tony forced himself to focus on his touch alone, on the way the familiar skin trembled against his.

Stephen's eyes turned away from him, facing the Titan once more. Tony tried to protest again, yet, all that he could manage was a betrayed wheeze. The sorcerer's fingers, though frail, dug into his arm, as if he could somehow keep Tony here with him by holding on tightly enough.

"Heal him." Stephen's words were firm and angry, filtering through to Tony's consciousness, past the pain and panic caused by his inability to breathe. Dark spots swam in front of his eyes, and it became harder and harder to follow the scene in front of him. 

And then the pain was fading. 

At first, Tony was sure it was the end - that his mind was numbing on its decent - but the opposite was true. Instead of his vision fading into darkness, it cleared, allowing him to focus on the pale blue eyes looking down at him worriedly. Eyes, he focussed on as he finally took a painless breath. 

He managed to sit up with Stephen's help, and Tony's eyes drifted between him and the Titan. His partner's look was longing yet hesitant, as if he wanted to speak but wasn't sure he was allowed to. The Titan ignored them completely, admiring his gauntlet - now filled with four stones - before getting onto a hovercraft and disappearing into the chaos.

"I'm sorry - I couldn't -," Stephen was the one to break the silence after all. Tony wanted to jump up and fight, but he couldn't. He needed a minute to catch his breath, and with Stephen, he'd always been able to pretend it was just the two of them. Even months before they'd gotten to know each other, the battle had melted away each time, his attention zeroing in on Stephen's smirk. 

"You shouldn't have done it." Tony's shoulders were tense, even though the wound had fully healed. "The universe-."

"I had no choice."

"Yes," Tony replied, his voice louder than he'd intended. He bit back the hysteria bubbling in his throat as he continued more firmly. "Yes, you _did_. You were biased!"

Stephen's face fell, his blue eyes turning a steely grey. Tony was way more familiar with that look than he wanted to be, and though for weeks he'd been fighting against it, trying to catch a glimpse of the feelings hidden behind it, he didn't care now. "If you're so ready to die, there's still plenty of opportunities left, but I, for one, would like to stop Thanos before it comes to that."

A sudden ripple of power crashed through the air, knocking Tony forward against Stephen's chest. They were pressed against the ground, Stephen underneath him, and Tony had to look away from his eyes. He focussed on the Cloak instead, but even the fabric seemed cross with him as it rippled around Stephen's shoulders - but Tony might have been projecting that onto it. Though he was still upset, seeing the sorcerer lock him out twisted something inside of him, and he glanced away from Stephen completely.

Around them, both friend and foe had stumbled to the ground, though it didn't look like anyone had been severely harmed. Tony sat up, offering his hand to help Stephen up as well, but the sorcerer ignored it as he got to his feet. 

Tony snubbed the tiny stab of hurt in his chest. He knew he had been harsh on Stephen, but this wasn't some small mistake anymore - everything they did now _mattered_. Every step - every _breath_ \- they took could decide their fate. They shouldn't waste an opportunity to stop Thanos lightly.

"What was that?"

"The mind stone," Stephen said, glancing around the floor before leaning down and pulling his ring from the debris. "Wanda must have managed to destroy it."

"So, we won?" Tony asked, trying not to sound too hopeful. He'd seen what the gauntlet had been able to do with only three stones, and Thanos did not seem the forgiving type.

"Not yet," Stephen grunted. His sentences had become curt and reluctant; Tony refused to let it bother him, though he couldn't fight against the annoyance bubbling in his chest. Tony had JARVIS check the teens before following Stephen through the portal he'd made.

They ended up back in the event hall. Rubble lay off to the side, cracks were running through the walls, revealing the concrete behind it, and the floor was sticky from spilled drinks and covered with glass shards. The room was a little worse for wear, but the damage had been minor. Still, Tony doubted Stark Industries would get its deposit back. 

From Tony's position in the middle of the room, he could see the battle raging on through the shattered floor-to-ceiling windows. With the Titan focussed on them, their side seemed to be winning, having used the mind Stone's blast to their advantage. 

Wanda was sitting on the floor; her arms wrapped protectively around Vision as she glared up at the Titan in defiance. The mind stone was gone, but the android, though a little dazed, was still standing - or well, splayed across Wanda's lap. Wanda had succeeded.

Tony wanted to be happy for her, wanted to bask in the relief of knowing the stone was destroyed, but Thanos' smirk made that impossible. He noticed Stephen form a spell, but the Titan was faster. He waved his hand, and the attack simply disappeared, fading out of existence.

"Don't you see, magician," the Titan mocked, "it's useless now."

"How?" Wanda asked, voice hoarse, "I destroyed the mind stone."

Tony watched as Thanos' eyes shifted towards Stephen. The Titan was smirking, but Stephen's face remained stone. 

Instead of explaining, the Titan merely lifted his gauntlet. Tony braced for the impact of whatever was going to come, but no attack came. Instead, green mist twirled in front of Wanda and Vision, weaving yellow flecks together, causing them to connect and grow until the mind stone was whole once more. 

That's when the panic Tony had been repressing came back all at once. 

The Titan walked up to the witch, expression venomous and unforgiving. Wanda lifted Vision off her lap until he was behind her, but Thanos simply plucked the stone out of the air. "But it's right here?"

Wanda jumped at him, spurring everyone in the room into another battle. 

Tony let himself get lost in it, pushing himself harder and harder. He felt breathless, more desperate than ever before, and he used all of it to his advantage. 

He had a plan, and the chaos of the battled seemed to be working in his favor, but he still needed to time it perfectly. He already felt the nanobots in his gauntlet shift, and he pushed in closer and closer against the Titan.

His suit had already been thorn pretty severely, but he used the most potent weapons he could still conjure and let the reactor's energy deplete to fire the most powerful blasts. 

Stephen's magic pushed with him, distracting the Titan, and Wanda was fighting alongside them. She managed to get up close and fight her way into the Titan's head, using the rest of her magic to hold him in place forcefully.

Thanos managed to break the arm with the gauntlet free, waving it in Stephen's direction. Golden chains wrapped around the sorcerer, anchoring him to the ground and preventing him from doing magic. Whatever could be said about Thanos, it was clear he had a powerful mind; determined and strong-willed. Tony could see Wanda struggling to hold on, but eventually, the Titan broke free from her control, grabbing her by the arm and throwing her on the ground. She lay unmoving, and Tony hoped it was merely because of the exhaustion.

It didn't take much for the Titan to throw Tony away after that. Tony let himself fall to his knees a little in front of the Titan, clutching his arm against his stomach. Thanos' gaze burnt a whole in him, and Tony felt as if he could feel the ground shift with his every movement. 

"With this," the Titan started, causing Tony to look up at him. Thanos was still watching him, lifting his hand in a thoughtless gesture of grandeur. "I'm sure the Asgardian prince won't mind giving me a lift." 

Tony tried to keep his breathing under control as he continued. "Getting the space stone will be easy with the five stones already in my possession."

"Count again." Tony gritted through his teeth, keeping his eyes locked on Thanos and trying not to show how much it cost him. He tore his hand away from where he'd been cradling it to his stomach, showing off the glowing infinity stones on his knuckles. The suit's gauntlet wasn't a perfect fit, and the energy wasn't as contained as he'd liked, but at least the stones weren't in Thanos' possession anymore.

The Titan's eyes widened as his gaze moved from Tony's held-up hand, glittering with the five stones, and his own golden, but empty, gauntlet. 

He could feel Stephen's gaze on him from where he was tied to the ground a few feet to his left. Despite Stephen's earlier comment, Tony wasn't suicidal. He knew that with how much the stones were already burning, actually using them would probably kill him. 

He might have hesitated, but his mind flitted towards Peter and Harley, and to Sophia, hopefully, safe at home. Stephen would take care of her, he trusted, and the teens would achieve great things. He just wouldn't be around to see it. 

He thought of Rhodey, having been there for him since basically the start of his life. Pepper, who'd helped him keep most of his sanity. And Happy, who had been by his side for years, a solid rock that was ever a constant. 

They were safe - or at least Pepper and Happy were. Rhodey would be too once he stopped Thanos. He wasn't self-deprecating enough to think they wouldn't suffer his loss, but they were strong, and Tony knew they would get through it. 

Pepper would be able to go on that date with that doctor she'd been gushing about, Happy and May would be able to grow old together, Rhodey would keep his world safe for him, and they'd all be able to watch Harley and Peter graduate, get married and take the world by storm. 

They would get to live out their lives happy and safe. 

That was all that really mattered to him. It only mattered that the ones he cared for were safe.

He was happy then that Stephen had saved him before if only so he could get to stop Thanos once and for all now. 

He had never been more certain.

This had to be what Stephen had seen, Tony suddenly realized. He'd understood the sorcerer had been trying to hold himself back because of something like this; he just hadn't been sure until now what Stephen had seen exactly. 

He felt a rush of sorrow, though not for himself. 

Despite his resolution, he turned to glance at Stephen after all, and he smiled.

He saw Stephen's mouth open as if trying to say something, but even if he hadn't frozen up, Tony knew he wouldn't have heard him over the blood rushing in his veins anyway. There was that pain in his eyes that he'd gotten so familiar with these last few weeks, but also something akin to hope.

That single spark fuelled Tony, pushing him to take that final step and snap his fingers together. 

He didn't see what happened. All he perceived was the endless pain shooting through his arm, alighting his nerves until it felt like his brain was burning, and before long, he fell into merciful darkness. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the title only kind of makes sense to me but once I came up with it I got attached. I love how you can see which songs i got obsessed with over the last year based on the titles of my fics but anyway 😂 Also my apologies to the one person who follows my POAS playlist; I know it's a mess; the songs needed to go in one place though. on the other hand, if you listen to it closely enough you might get spoiled 😝
> 
> (I still refuse to watch endgame a second time so I basically winged it but it's fine cause endgame is bs anyway and it was probably obvious in the previous chapters but ragnarok didn't happen either - basically everything after Ultron got warped... and some things before that cause, ... you know, Stephen's accident happened earlier than it's supposed to, and the sorcerers are villains... i always liked to think of it as a comic universe you know with the villains just doing random shit every day idk)


	35. Happiest Year

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Actually had this written since the week after I last updated and only did minor edits then. Sorry, it took so long to get around to posting it, but I wasn't sure how I wanted to go about the last few chapters and couldn't be sure I wouldn't want to add to this or rearrange some things.
> 
> I'm quite happy with how it turned out and I hope you'll enjoy it as well 👀

It had been a cold winter, so much the worse without Tony, and it kept its pace into late March. When they’d left the apartment, he’d made sure Sophia was wrapped up against the wind, but she’d already discarded her scarf as she climbed up the slide. Stephen held onto it, watching from a distance as he twisted the fabric in his gloved hands. 

The park was empty, though it was late enough in the day that school should be over, and people would be getting off work. Perhaps the grey weather kept them away. 

Stephen definitely preferred it this way, though he knew Sophia had been disappointed at a lack of possible new friends. 

There was a bittersweet fondness in watching Sophia play. 

She was so imaginative and vibrant, it was impossible not to have her joy rub off on you, but she was so much like Tony; it only made Stephen miss him more. 

He swallowed against the knot in his throat before checking his watch. It had been eight weeks since the fight against Thanos, but thinking about Tony hadn’t gotten any easier. Everything reminded him of the engineer, which made it hard to focus on the happy moments. Still, he somehow always managed to fake a smile around Sophia; She made it almost natural. He was grateful for her every day, and, by extension, grateful for Tony. If it hadn’t been for him, this bundle of happiness wouldn’t have been in his life.

Stephen called Sophia down from the castle, and she slid down the fire pole so she could run up to join him. After Stephen had wrapped the scarf back around her, she carefully grabbed Stephen’s hand and looked up at him. “Are we going home already?”

“We need to stop by the store first,” he answered as he started leading her towards the park exit. “Uncle Rhodey’s coming to dinner, remember?”

“Can we get dessert?” 

“Sure, what would you like?” 

As they walked, Stephen didn’t allow his thoughts to wander. He stayed fully focussed on Sophia, seemingly wrapped up in their conversation about the movie she had watched yesterday. Even though he knew which buildings to avoid, even if their route had been designed to evade certain street corners, shrines for Earth’s Hero still kept popping up around the city. Be it on alley walls, Billboards, or a simple sticker against a pole, New York was determined to honor Tony Stark. 

As gratifying as it was to finally see Tony get his due respect, Stephen hated the constant reminder. 

If it hadn’t been for Sophia needing the normalcy, he would have portalled them back. Then again, if it hadn’t been for Sophia, he’d probably never leave the sanctum in the first place. The walk did him good, the fresh air, and physical activity, even if it meant being painfully aware of Avengers Tower looming over the city to their left. 

They made it back to the sanctum barely an hour later. After the day she’d had, Sophia was in good spirits, especially as Stephen had agreed to buy her chocolate mouse if she promised to eat her vegetables. The entrance hall was lit, the candles against the wall burning steadily, and laughter came from upstairs. 

Stephen recognized Wanda’s airy voice and Vision’s steady tone. He vaguely wondered if Wong was upstairs as well; the other sorcerer had been spending more time at the sanctum, and Stephen assumed it was to keep an eye on him.

At the opposite end of that spectrum stood Mordo, who hadn’t been at the sanctum since the Ancient One had died. Stephen had only seen him once after the fight with Thanos as the other sorcerer seemed to have caught Stephen’s obsession with studying. Mordo had been one of their most skilled sorcerers in the field, but he had barely left the library in the last couple of months. However, he had been less cold after Tony’s sacrifice, and Wong had told him he was slowly getting back to his old self. Stephen was glad for it, having missed one of his closest friends. 

He suspected Mordo was relieved to have learned the Ancient One hadn’t lied after all - that he hadn’t been foolish to put his trust in her. Stephen, however, was starting to feel like she’d set him up. 

She’d always been strangely supportive of his feelings - allowing him to indulge in them. Stephen had just thought it was her way of getting Tony on their side, but now he wondered if she’d known all along. Suppose she’d purposefully lead him down a path of heartbreak and grief. 

He shook this train of thought as he had to follow Sophia, the girl already running off in the direction of Tony’s apartment. It would be a while before he’d be able to think of it as anything but Tony’s, no matter how long he’d now lived there on his own. 

Tony’s penthouse was empty and dark, but Sophia’s tiny voice filled it immediately, starting a conversation with JARVIS about the story she’d been playing out with her dolls. Stephen had considered turning him off, but he hadn’t had the heart to. Sophia enjoyed talking to him, and it was great to have an extra set of - digital - eyes watching her, even if hearing his voice cut through him like a knife. Every word a reminder of the person he’d wanted most. 

Besides, he’d been the one to bring JARVIS back from his proverbial death in the first place. Back then, it has simply been something to please Tony, a bit of joy he could return to his life. It hadn’t been hard either; the 1s and 0s of code weren’t so different as the molecules of an apple.

He urged Sophia to go grab her dolls and continue her play while he went into the kitchen to put the groceries away and start dinner. 

As much as he enjoyed and was grateful for Sophia’s presence, he needed a moment of reprieve. He left the kitchen dark, letting the city stand out through the floor-to-ceiling windows. It made the space feel heavy and soothing, like a warm blanket, and he could almost pretend he was back in his old apartment - way before the accident... before meeting Tony. 

He wouldn’t trade the time he’d had with Tony for anything, and yet... it undeniably would have been easier. Back then, he’d been convinced caring about anyone, but himself was a waste of time. Stephen now knew he was right. It had only brought more heartbreak. 

For every joyful moment he had in his new life, there was a reminder of Tony just a breath away. Each like a piece of paper cutting through his skin, until every once in a while, somebody threw a bucket of acid over him. 

He heard the front door open, and Stephen managed to compose himself. He shook all thoughts of Tony out of his mind and started unpacking the groceries as he listened to Rhodey’s voice coming from the living room. 

Rhodey stepped into the kitchen five minutes later, Sophia on his hip as she told him about their day. 

Stephen’s forced smile was reflected on the older man’s face, the tired grief weighing him down and cutting lines into his skin. He was one of the few people Stephen truly felt comfortable around these days; the only person he didn’t feel like he had to put on a mask around. 

Nodding in greeting, Stephen finished putting away the groceries and started the stove. Cooking was getting more comfortable now he was forced to do it regularly, but he was still grateful when Rhodes stepped up next to him without asking and started peeling the potatoes. Sophia, used to the routine, was fine sitting at the table and working on her puzzle book. 

Dinner passed in the same familiarity. Stephen always felt better after it. He wasn’t sure if it was the presence of another adult, someone who understood his grief, or if it was guilt over keeping Sophia so secluded. The teens still visited whenever they could, but she didn’t have anyone her own age to play with. It couldn’t be easy for the young girl to spend her time surrounded by grieving adults, all the while she missed Tony herself. Especially as she’d only lost her mother a few months before. 

Just like she had then, she took the changes in stride, but there were bad days, days where she cried for either of her lost parents. She hadn’t known Tony that long, but Stephen understood more than anyone how quickly the man could worm his way into your heart. 

* * *

Rhodes left an hour after Sophia had been put to bed. The two men had mainly spent that time in companionable silence, sharing a drink. There wasn’t much that needed to be said; shared grief just felt a lot lighter. 

It was proven the moment the door closed after the colonel. The darkness wasn’t comforting anymore, just somber and cold. 

He took a minute to stand in the quiet, listening for Sophia, before Stephen sighed and grabbed his glass, which still had some whiskey in it. He was already aching to go to bed, but his eyes fell on the instrument standing to the side. 

He’d barely looked at it since - … he didn’t want to revisit the memory attached to it. 

Yet suddenly, he felt it beckon him, and Stephen was too tired to resist its pull. He placed his glass on the top, running a teasing finger over the keys. A single note lit up the room, and Stephen froze, only then recognizing the noise could wake Sophia. There was no noise from her bedroom, though, and he really couldn’t resist. 

He sat down on the stool, placing his hands experimentally onto the keys, and started to play. 

He hadn’t realized what song he’d planned to play until he recognized the notes. They cut through him, pulling him back into Tony’s arms. Back to their last moment of peace. 

Even if Stephen’s eidetic memory hadn’t recalled every word, it wouldn’t have been hard to supply the lyrics to the refrain; they were the words that had haunted him in the last eight weeks.

As during that time, he’d found himself quietly thanking Tony.

Stephen wouldn’t thank him for his sacrifice. 

He _couldn’t_. 

He wasn’t strong nor self-less enough. 

But he thanked him, nonetheless.

Thanked him for the happiest year of his life. 

He’d made him taste happiness as he’d never felt before; made him imagine a life filled with love instead of the loneliness which he’d been so accustomed to. 

If he closed his eyes and focussed on the music, he could still see Tony’s eyes locked on him as they swayed in a dance for just the two of them. His fingers on the keys burned with the feel of Tony’s hand against his skin, holding on tightly - a comforting anchor. 

_Thank you for the happiest year of my life_, the music had sung, his heartbreaking again at the memory of Tony leaning in closer, singing along to the music; his smile so bright it would lit up the North Pole in winter. 

Tony hadn’t listened closely enough to the music, Stephen thought bitterly, as he’d been focussing on every line. 

_Because you gave me peace, and I wasted it._

Stephen had wasted time worrying about Tony’s death, praying he could stop the inevitable from happening.

Tony was everything to him, and yet the time they could have spent together had been wasted by his Sisyphean burden. 

It was a while before he realized he’d stopped playing. His hands rested on the keys, but his eyes were focused on the horizon through the big windows, his mind only seeing the brown of Tony’s irises. He wasn’t sure how long he’d been sitting there like that, but it was a movement in his peripheral vision that eventually caught his attention. 

He turned and stilled. Sophia was standing in the doorway, her favorite teddy bear in her hand. She looked tired but curious, eying the piano longingly. Still, the sadness that she usually seemed to hide so well was unmistakable at the late hour. Her shoulders were slumped, and her face subdued with more than just exhaustion. 

“I’m sorry, Fay, did I wake you?” He asked quietly, swallowing his heartache. 

When she didn’t respond, he patted the seat next to him, indicating she could join him. The young girl seemed relieved, tiny smiles pulling at her lip as she ran over and climbed onto the stool. Stephen helped steady her, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her onto his lap instead. 

The feeling of her leaning back against his chest was familiar by now but still as comforting as ever. He pulled her closer, resting his chin on her crown and letting her curls tickle his nose. 

“When are we going to see Tony again?” The question was unsurprising but still took his breath away. 

Despite it having been weeks and the relatively short time she’d spend with him, she always asked to visit. Tony had that effect on people; he latched himself under your heart and refused to move. Sophia, Stephen had learned since becoming her primary caregiver, was just as stubborn as her father. She held on to the people close to her and didn’t let go. 

Stephen knew it had been too long since he’d taken her. He himself could barely take it. Hospitals had been like a second home to him for years; he knew every little protocol, every scent, every squeak. 

Yet, he still remembered the first time he’d entered a hospital as a late teen. Back then, he’d had to say goodbye to his beloved younger sister, and her death had been quick. He couldn’t imagine what it must be like for Sophia to spend so much time waiting on a loved one who might never wake up.

He held onto Sophia tightly but didn’t answer. If Tony were to die, he couldn’t care less if it was for the universe, but thinking of Tony’s sacrifice specifically for this little girl… he could imagine it - he could _almost_ believe it had been worth it. He needed to hold onto that, needed to believe that if Tony had given his life, it was for his daughter, his sons, for the people he loved, not random strangers Stephen couldn’t care less about.

He kissed the top of her head, and they continued sitting in silence until Stephen noticed the girl had fallen asleep in his arms. 

* * *

Stephen opened his eyes again to find Pepper sitting by Tony’s bedside. He should have known that even the late hour wouldn’t have stopped her from visiting her friend at least once a day. Paperwork was strewn over the chair next to her, indicating she had been working at some point. Stephen’s friend was standing behind her chair; arms wrapped comfortingly around Pepper’s neck.

They smiled at Stephen as he appeared, but Stephen didn’t yet feel up to doing the same. Being in Tony’s room always put a heavy cloud over him, darkening his mood and making him feel more lethargic. 

It wasn’t right for Tony to be so motionless. His energy usually lit up the room - like the sun was the center of their corner of the universe.

But just like any star, its absence was just as decisive as its presence. 

It left the room cold and hopeless, diminishing any form of light that was left.

Pepper collected her papers and got up from the chair, waking Stephen from his thoughts. 

“How’s Sophia holding up?” She asked him, voice quiet. It was a ridiculous notion, Stephen thought humourlessly, as waking Tony from his seemingly endless slumber was the goal. 

Nevertheless, his voice was dimmed too, when he replied; it was an instinct he couldn’t shake. “She’s doing alright, I think, better than we could hope. She’s been through so much already, but she’s resilient. I promised we’d visit Tony tomorrow.”

“You sure you’ll be alright here all night?” Christine asked, even though he’d been sitting by Tony’s bedside every night since he’d been admitted. 

“I’m not actually here, remember,” Stephen smiled but didn’t feel it, and indicated his astral form.

The first few nights, he’d sat by his bedside in person, holding his hand as an anchor. But Tony had refused to wake up, and his body’s needs had betrayed him. Sophia was way too perceptive for her own good, and as Wong had pointed out many times throughout their friendship, sleep deprivation was not a good look on him. He wouldn’t want the young girl worrying about him as well. 

This was a decent enough alternative, and he reassured Pepper and Christine that he’d be okay. The two women smiled sadly at Tony once more before leaving Stephen alone with him.

Even now, Stephen couldn’t be angry at Tony for worming his way into his life. Honestly, who was he kidding? It was his own mistake for falling for the idiot and not leaving well enough alone. 

But he’d given Tony the key to his heart, and the bastard had made copies for all his friends. He should be upset that he’d gotten to care for so many people - especially after he’d been cruelly reminded of the consequences of love - but what Tony had actually done was make sure that Stephen was never alone. Even now, going through the world’s hardest heartbreak, he had people to lean on, people who made it more bearable. Here Stephen was, thanking Tony once more. 

He just wished he could tell him how grateful he was, one day. There would be so much he still needed to say to him. Like how much Stephen loved him.

He’d never gotten around to saying those words - to this day, he’d never let them pass his lips, not even to Tony’s sleeping form. All the months he’d gotten to spend with Tony, all the moments the engineer had said it first - had said it so freely - he hadn’t even been able to say it back. He’d been too afraid of the consequences. Afraid that loving Tony would make it hurt so much more. Yet, just because it remained unspoken didn’t make it any less true. Stephen had known that too. 

“Stephen.”

If it had been any other day, Stephen might have jumped at the sudden appearance, might have been intrigued or elated to hear the voice of his old tutor. 

Today, he mainly sighed, barely lifting his eyes from Tony’s face to meet hers. “You haunt the hospital now? Doesn’t your soul belong to the dark dimension?”

“I’m still dying, actually.” She answered casually, turning her own gaze towards the window overlooking the city. “At this exact moment, we’re standing on the balcony. I merely sent part my mind ahead.” 

“Why?” Stephen asked and didn’t manage to keep all of the scorn out of his voice. It was hard not to get bitter sometimes, watching over Tony’s body as it slowly withered away. The doctors could keep his body alive, sure, but every minute his eyes stayed close, Stephen felt like a piece of Tony’s soul was leaving the world. Every second he stared at him, _begging_ him to twitch, he felt resentment bubble in his stomach like acid. 

A few months ago, she had told him he’d play a more significant role in all of it. Had trusted him to steer the timeline in the right direction. All he’d supposed to do was avoid one big bad from happening, and he’d failed. She’d warned him that allowing Thanos to come to earth meant losing Tony; it was his fault for not achieving the task she’d handed him. 

Maybe she was here to scold him for allowing such a close call. If Tony hadn’t succeeded… who knew where they’d be now. Or perhaps she just came to gloat, to say ‘I told you so.’ 

“I owe you an explanation.” She responded, instead, catching him off guard. He stepped - or well, floated - away from Tony’s bedside, getting closer to the Ancient One as he stared at her. There was a knot in his chest he couldn’t quite place - like a cross between apprehension and hope. He wasn’t even sure what he was hoping for. 

When she’d allowed him to join the sorcerers, she’d been unsure about her decision, and yet she’d seemed to favor him. He knew she’d had expectations of him, thought him useful, and that she hadn’t approved of his arrogance or condescension to their higher cause. And yet, she’d allowed him to spend his time studying as he wanted. She’d only pushed him to get more involved in the bigger scheme once the Avengers had been formed and become a bother. He’d never allowed himself to consider it as anything but the Ancient One needing the most skilled on the frontline. That she couldn’t have him waste his talents when they’d be useful fighting off their enemies. 

Just like she’d allowed his feelings for Tony because they were useful to them.

But he still often wondered; it didn’t feel like that was all of it. 

Only when the Ancient One opened her mouth to speak again, her eyes still fixed on the horizon, he realized he was yet to respond. 

“You’re wondering why you never saw it coming.” It wasn’t a question, so he didn’t answer. He used to respect her for seeing through him, for being able to read him so flawlessly. It had been comforting, being known, now it just felt condescending. Like Stephen was as predictable as a child. “The spell I showed you didn’t show you possible futures; it showed you other realities.”

“What-“ He froze. His brain tried to process her words, but the building indignation made it difficult. He tried to piece the puzzle together, but it didn’t make sense. “Why-“

He swallowed his words, gritting his teeth in anger as he glanced away from her. He didn’t even know where to start.

He’d spend the last two years believing they were steering the world towards a brighter future, that they were simply solving a puzzle - a maze where there was only one right way. That was all; what? A lie? A trick? But to what end? 

Eventually, he decided on asking the ‘how’ first?. He needed to think, needed to start with the semantics, and works his way up. “It’s the time stone, not the reality stone.”

“Time and reality are more entwined than you think. Every time a choice is made, a new timeline branches off. Reality is made anew,” she started explaining and finally turned her gaze away from the unassuming sky to look him in the eyes. Despite Stephen’s anger, he felt a spark of comfort at the familiarity, a sense of longing for the mentor he had lost. “When people discuss the multiverse theory, they get lost at the idea of a thousand new realities. Which is true, but it also pushes our course, _our_ future, in a particular direction. While a million new realities are created when you decide to choose between jam or butter, _you_ decide which reality you will follow.”

“So… what does that mean?” Stephen had a suspicion, but he needed her to say it. Needed to hear it from her.

“You never saw your possible future; you saw the scenarios where you chose jam instead of butter - the realities you left behind. The spell I used sent me ahead. The spell I showed you pushed you ahead and to the left.” 

His eyes settled on Tony’s form once more, timing his breaths with the steady rise and fall of his chest. He already knew all that time he'd spent searching for a solution had been _wasted_ \- but apparently, a solution had never even existed - and this cause she'd supposedly bestowed upon him had been but a lie. There had been no hope in changing their course, just empty promises.

“Why?” he asked again.

It was all he _could_ ask, trying desperately to hold on to the anger when all he was really starting to feel was defeat. 

“You were slipping,” she explained airily. She might as well have shrugged. "You joined our ranks because you had nothing to lose, not a worry in the world. Caring about another person made you determined to keep the world safe, yes, but it also made you reluctant to do what needed to be done. You were afraid of losing Tony by crossing a moral line he wouldn’t be able to forgive, so I had to show that not crossing the line would be worse.”

At his expression, she continued, tone turning into a scold. “Oh, don’t be a hypocrite, Stephen. You were perfectly fine with using others as puppets. I simply had to help you get over your indisposition. And did you not get what you want?”

“I didn’t want this. He’s _dying_.” The words felt like acid, having festered in his throat for months, but he spat them at The Ancient One’s feet now. As soon as they were out, he felt exhaustion settle back into his bones. It was a nice reprieve to pretend for just a moment that he blamed her.

The Ancient One’s gaze turned to Tony, and Stephen could swear there was fondness in her eyes. Her tone was soft when she continued, reassuring and comforting in a way that Stephen wasn’t used to coming from her. She’d been caring, yes, but firm, never comforting. “I won’t pretend to know whether he makes it or not, but he’s not dead yet. It’s as much as we could have hoped for. That is the truth.” 

“You knew this would happen?”

“And it happened as it should.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _ they're just like puppets on a string string string _
> 
> Is it a surprise that Selena Gomez' Rare was my most listened to album of 2020? 😝 (also the song mentioned is Happiest Year by Jaymes young - it's literally too beautiful)
> 
> I don't know how long it will be for the next chapter. I've started it and have some ideas I'll hopefully be able to work out over the next couple of days, but when I'll actually get around to rounding up the last few chapters as usual I have no clue. 
> 
> Anyway, thanks to everyone who's stuck around this long! It's been over a year now, jeez, and I know during the last eight months updates have been slow but I really do appreciate all of you who still comment and leave nice notes! Any feedback on how I've handled this story is great because I've never done a big fic like this before - at least none that have actual plot 💕💕 
> 
> To those who celebrate; I hope you have a wonderful Christmas Eve/Day!


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